Manhattanhenge

On such a sweet night, Su Hui only slept for less than two hours, and was dominated by the excitement brought about by hypomania.

Normally, it is difficult for him to stay in a certain room. Even in the middle of the night, he would run to the garden, or even leave the house and walk to the street in the early morning. Only in this way can he consume energy.

But Ning Yixiao is here, even if he is stuck in a room all the time, Su Hui can accept it.

Ning Yixiao is very used to hugging him from behind, with his arms half around his waist, whether he is doing it or simply sleeping in each other's arms, he seems to prefer this posture very much.

And Su Hui also likes to turn her head to look at him, kiss him, and get close to his nose bridge and chin, so she would wake him up occasionally, and Ning Yixiao had to let go of her arms and hug him face to face.

Su Hui deliberately counted, Ning Yixiao slept heavier than he imagined, and changed four sleeping positions in one night, but each of them hugged him.The cutest thing was at four o'clock in the morning, when Su Hui got up and drank a big mouthful of water, and then lay down, Ning Yixiao hugged her waist and buried her face in his chest, making Su Hui even swallow easily.

Just after dawn, the city is still a soft light blue, like soaking in a swimming pool, with a kind of beauty with a sense of transparency.The dim light shines through the white gauze curtains, illuminating the room.

Su Hui got out of bed quietly, his waist was too sore, and the more he lay down, the more uncomfortable it became, but he didn't bother about it, and even felt that Ning Yixiao shouldn't be so gentle because it was his first experience.

A little more pain will make the memory more profound.

Entering and withdrawing, Su Hui felt the danger of being carefully cared for and losing control at the same time, a beautiful contradiction.

He washed in a very low voice, looked in the mirror in the bathroom, carefully observed the traces left on his skin, and the images in his memory appeared in his mind in dislocation.

The temperature in the bathroom was very high, making people dizzy. Thinking of the few unserious words Ning Yixiao said to him in front of the mirror, Su Hui felt a little hot.

Walking out of the bathroom, he picked up the Morpho Aurora that Ning Yixiao had given him, walked to the floor-to-ceiling window, and quietly admired the morning sun.

How can there be such a beautiful butterfly?

And it turned into a butterfly that belonged to him.

At eight o'clock, Su Hui lay down beside the bed, gently traced the shape of Ning Yixiao's hand with his fingertips.

His hands are so beautiful, Su Hui couldn't help expressing emotion in his heart, like the hands in Giovanni Gasparo's oil painting, slender, with prominent muscles and bones, well-defined joints, a little wheat-colored, and blue veins spreading under the skin To the forearm, full of vitality.

Su Hui was trying to hold it, but Ning Yixiao's hand suddenly lifted up and touched his forehead lightly.

He woke up.

Su Hui put both arms on the edge of the bed, leaned forward, put his forehead and face against Ning Yixiao's hand, pressed the tip of his nose against his palm, and rubbed against it.

Ning Yixiao suddenly laughed, with a deep voice, "Only kittens can rub their heads against people."

Su Hui felt that this idea was already deeply ingrained in Ning Yixiao's mind, so she didn't bother to argue with him.But he started to scratch his chin, it was very itchy, Su Hui lowered his head and gently bit Ning Yixiao's fingertips.

But he didn't just bite, but more like using the tip of his teeth to fix it, preventing Ning Yixiao's hand from escaping, the tip of his tongue licked around his fingertips, and then sent it deeper, as if trying to let a part of his body enter his own. .

Ning Yixiao didn't speak, but her breathing became heavier.

He put his other hand over his eyes as if trying to resist, but after a few seconds, he conceded defeat and took the initiative back - poking his fingers in, stirring.

It was difficult for Su Hui to breathe, the tongue nail was moved, and the fingers were almost like a simulation, but it was slower and more gradual.

Transparent saliva dripped from the corner of his mouth, and Su Hui's eyes and chin were wet.

At the moment when he couldn't breathe and choked out because he penetrated too deeply, Ning Yixiao withdrew his hand, pinched Su Hui's cheek with wet fingers, stared at him, with a very shallow smile on his face .

"Su Hui, your face is wet."

What he said made Su Hui feel familiar.

Ning Yixiao leaned over again, regardless of Su Hui's panting, kissed his wet mouth and chin, and tasted it.

But Su Hui leaned forward and uttered a few inaudible words in a breathless voice.

The room is very bright, and the fragrance of flowers gradually wafts into the air, exuding sweetness and fragrance.

The line of sight alternates between stupor and clarity, and the dome light recessed in the ceiling gradually casts double images on the retina.

The bed sheet was tightly clenched, and Su Hui had many hallucinations in his mind. In a flash, he was like a vine growing out of a barren grassland, being nourished and allowed to grow wantonly.

Only the voice was suppressed between Ning Yixiao's fingers, passing as quickly as time.

In Ning Yixiao's arms, Su Hui felt surrounded by love for the first time, seamlessly, he lost consciousness, and even called his first name without surname.

He didn't know that this reminded Ning Yixiao of unpleasant childhood memories, but because Su Hui was so nice and sweet, the happiness he brought covered the hidden pain in Ning Yixiao's heart.

Su Hui, who was far more energetic than ordinary people, finally fell asleep, but only for an hour.

He felt as if he was being crushed by a heavy stone in his sleep, and when Ning Yixiao woke him up, the stone was finally removed, leaving him in soreness and unbearable pain.

Standing up with her hands and leaning against the head of the bed, Su Hui felt her throat hurt.Ning Yixiao came over and brought water for him thoughtfully. He had already changed into yesterday's black shirt. He was very handsome and not too serious.

Su Hui lowered his head and glanced at himself, his whole body was covered with red marks, comparing the two, he was even less serious.

"Are you hungry?" Ning Yixiao asked, "Do you want to go out to eat, or I'll buy it back."

Su Hui began to play tricks, "I can't get up, I'm so tired..." He leaned against the bed, reached out to touch the bedside table, and grabbed the phone, "Come and eat."

Ning Yixiao sat on the edge of the bed, and Su Hui leaned on his shoulder obediently. He reached out and touched Su Hui's smooth back.

Su Hui shouted in a hoarse voice, leaned over to kiss Ning Yixiao for a short time, and then asked him, "Do you like me?"

Ning Yixiao felt that it was unnecessary to ask this question, but still nodded, "I like it."

"How much do you like...to what extent?"

Ning Yixiao thought for a while, "To the extent that I want to give you everything you want."

Su Hui smiled, "Don't lie."

"I'm not lying." Ning Yixiao took his hand, "It will be done."

After he finished speaking, he kissed the top of Su Hui's hair, called him a kitten, and acted like a big boy who just fell in love.

Su Hui thought, he was the same, but usually too mature.

"You like nicknames so much." He asked intentionally, "Will you give them to others too?"

Ning Yixiao looked at him, shook his head, "No."

Never had.

He didn't even know when he felt that Su Hui was like a kitten, maybe it was the first time we met, or maybe it was a certain moment when we got along.

Su Hui lay down on his lap, looking up at him, "It's also the first time I've been nicknamed by someone."

Ning Yixiao stroked his hair, "Really? Don't you have a nickname?"

Su Hui blinked, "Yes."

"What's your name?" Ning Yixiao asked.

"Youyou."

Ning Yixiao raised his eyebrows, "Carefree?"

Su Hui lowered his eyelids, "Excellent yu, top students yu, excellent yu." His tone was a bit self-willed, and he said bluntly: "I don't like this name, it was given by my grandfather. When he was young, he often Call me, I don't think he called me."

Ning Yixiao looked into his eyes, "Who is it calling?"

"The me he expected, a fantasy image." Su Hui dissected his family indifferently, "Just like he often said to me, be a useful person and do useful things. Everything I like to do All of them are defined as useless things by him.”

Ning Yixiao listened, lowered his head, and kissed the tip of Su Hui's nose, "Then besides this nickname?"

"No more." Su Hui buried her face in his arms, "Only kittens."

"Then you just be my kitten." Ning Yixiao stroked his shoulder.

Su Hui thought that there would never be another person in this world who would say such things to him.

During the meal, Ning Yixiao asked him if anyone else knew about his illness.Su Hui shook his head.

"They won't let me speak out." Su Hui said, "I only told you."

After a long pause, he told Ning Yixiao, "I think about it now, probably after my father left, I became ill, but it was not obvious, because I was hypomanic, and I just felt that I had endless energy and could stay up late to study. A lot of things. During the summer vacation when I was 14, I painted a room full of pictures, and one day I suddenly ran to my grandfather and told my grandpa that I wanted to study art."

"Grandpa scolded me and lost all my paints and paintings. I rode my bicycle to chase the garbage truck, but I couldn't find it."

Su Hui said, still laughing, "I still remember him calling me 'brain abnormal' at that time, but I didn't expect it to be a prophecy. I don't know how he felt when he saw the diagnosis sheet later."

Ning Yixiao felt a little distressed. Su Hui, who was thirteen or fourteen years old, must be very cute, but also very pitiful.

He could imagine Su Hui riding a bicycle on the street chasing after the lost painting, but thinking about it made him feel sad.

"Did you go to see a doctor after that?" Ning Yixiao raised his hand and wiped the corner of Su Hui's mouth naturally.

Su Hui shook her head, "I didn't know that at that time. One day after the start of school, I remembered that I was taking an English class, a group discussion, and suddenly I couldn't do it anymore. It was like the sky was falling, and it happened to be on me alone, panting. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't speak or move, and then I started crying, which scared me all over the table."

"Later the teacher contacted my mother, she was on a business trip and asked the driver to come."

Su Hui spoke fluently and quickly, as if he was telling someone else's story, "He took me to the hospital, but the psychiatric department in that hospital was not very good. The plane came back, and the doctor told her that I was severely depressed."

"She didn't understand why I suddenly became depressed. The whole family didn't understand. The only possible possibility was hereditary theory, because my uncle also suffered from mental illness." Su Hui lowered her head and ate a mouthful of porridge. That's all it takes."

Ning Yixiao frowned, "But you are not depressed."

"Well, it was a misdiagnosis." Su Hui pursed her lips, "I found out later that bipolar type [-] can easily be misdiagnosed as depression, because it is hypomania, which is not obvious, but the manifestations of depression are very serious. Many people It was all wrong. But because I was wrongly treated for half a year, the situation is getting worse."

He said casually: "I was 15 years old, I remember it was Wednesday, because on Wednesday, Chen's mother would make plum tomatoes. At eleven o'clock that night, I stabbed here with a utility knife."

Su Hui took his hand and put it under the ribs, "It's here, you saw it yesterday, it's got seven stitches, it's ugly."

Ning Yixiao felt pain, but he couldn't tell where it hurt.

He subconsciously covered Su Hui's old wound, and even began to imagine that if he had been there at that time, it would have been more difficult to suppress the vague pain.

He thought he couldn't empathize with anyone.

"Does it hurt?"

Su Hui held her chin in her hand and stirred the porridge with a spoon, "Actually, I don't feel anything, I'm numb."

Ning Yixiao asked, "What were you thinking at that time?"

Su Hui knew that what he said was cruel to Ning Yixiao, but he didn't want to cheat.

"I just feel like I have nothing to miss."

After finishing speaking, the spoon was thrown down and collided with the porcelain bowl with a ding sound.

He looked at Ning Yixiao, "It would be nice if you showed up earlier."

Maybe this scar can also be withdrawn.

Ning Yixiao's hug is the smallest but most effective healing place in the world, silently filling all his wounds with tenderness.

Su Hui seems to have returned to the day in New York, and his longing for Ning Yixiao reached its peak. He hoped that Ning Yixiao could appear in his difficult adolescence, hug him when everyone denied him, and say that he loved him over and over again. he.

"Actually, my manic period is quite funny."

Su Hui smiled, wanting to make Ning Yixiao happy, "I never told you that people will become very strange during the manic period, for example, they will especially want to buy things, and the desire to shop is extremely strong."

Ning Yixiao stroked his cheek with his fingers, "What did you buy?"

"There are so many, I can't say enough." Su Hui thought for a while, and found the one he thought was the most amazing, "It should have been when I was 17 years old. At that time, I saw a video on the Internet, which was shot by a foreigner. There are a lot of elephants in there that have been killed by poachers."

He sat up from Ning Yixiao's arms, and said to him: "They will kill elephants cruelly in order to get the most complete ivory. At the end of the video, the foreigner calls on everyone to protect the elephant herd. You can adopt an elephant for money." If there are only baby elephants, they will be placed in the elephant conservation base."

"You adopted one?" Ning Yixiao raised his eyebrows.

A somewhat embarrassed smile appeared on Su Hui's face, and he raised his hands to gesture, "Seven...I named them." He sang the seven-note scale while snapping his fingers, "do, re, mi, fa, sol, la, si."

Ning Yixiao was amused by him, "Really? Then where are they now?"

Su Hui sighed, "Although it is said to be adopted, but they cannot be transported back to China, it is equivalent to subsidizing them. The money is used to pay for the care and food expenses of special personnel."

"A lot of money, right?"

Su Hui couldn't help laughing, "I almost maxed out my card, and then my grandfather found out and beat me up, but the donation money can't be refunded, and he wants face the most, so it's impossible for him to ask for a donation." I can only be punished for the money that was taken away, and since then, my mobile phone payment has also been turned off, and only a fixed amount of money is given every day."

As he spoke, he put his arms around Ning Yixiao's neck, "I saved the money for the date."

"You are so cute." Ning Yixiao kissed him, then pinched his face, "The kitten saves the elephant."

Su Hui leaned over and bit his hand, then leaned back on the bed, lit a cigarette and smoked.

He looks beautiful smoking a cigarette, full of sex and melancholy, but the corners of his mouth are raised.In the last moment, it was the innocence of a child, childishly showing him the double-sided pain of adolescence, and now it is an adult again, exhaling gray smoke rings, "Ning Yixiao, I told you everything, there is still time to run."

Ning Yixiao stared at him for a moment, smoked half of the cigarette from his lips, and kissed him with some force, Su Hui even tasted the smell of blood.

When they parted, Ning Yixiao pinched his chin and wiped away the blood on his lips with his thumb.

"Drink plenty of water, the first kiss will break."

Su Hui hooked his neck and asked suddenly, "Have you used up all the boxes?"

Ning Yixiao responded and nodded.

He kissed Ning Yixiao's lips, and gave a very unreliable suggestion, "Don't wear it..."

At the last moment, Ning Yixiao still stood firm.

The little kitty who opened the meat is really hard to fight.

But he told Su Hui very seriously, "When I fell in love with you, you were like this. I don't need you to be healthy or outstanding. That's fine, it's unique in the world."

He said cherishingly, "Su Hui, I love you very much, don't doubt it."

After that, Su Hui seemed to feel that presenting herself as a gift was not enough, so she also made a copy of the key of the "Secret Base", put it in a small box, and gave it to Ning Yixiao on a date.

As soon as Ning Yixiao saw the beautiful box, she had a conditioned reflex, "I didn't mean to say that I don't need expensive gifts."

Su Hui opened the box directly in front of him, only one knee away from the person who proposed in the movie, but what was inside was a brand new key.

He could tell that Ning Yixiao liked it, because he didn't know where to put the key when he got it, and held it in his palm for a long time.

Be it the skin or the inside, he longs to be possessed by Ning Yixiao.

Unlike ordinary couples, they spend most of their dating time walking, because Su Hui likes walking very much, especially in some quiet and beautiful parks or forests, where they can hold Ning Yixiao's hand and talk to him a lot .

He likes plants, and often stops to point them out to Ning Yixiao and tell him the scientific name of this plant.

And Ning Yixiao never gets bored.

Seeing the little blue flowers on the ground, Su Hui suddenly thought of the flowers in her own garden.

"It's time to change the basin of my blue cloudy rain."

Just like that, he suddenly pulled Ning Yixiao into the car and sat all the way to his house.This is Ning Yixiao's second visit, but he still hasn't calmed down his anxiety.

Su Hui pulled him, and went in the same way as last time, "Today, my mother lives with her boyfriend and won't come back. My grandparents are still out of town."

He took Ning Yixiao to the garden, found the fence planted with blue rain, squatted down, and taught Ning Yixiao how to change the pot.But Ning Yixiao saw that he was looking too seriously, and lost his mind.

Seeing that he didn't respond, Su Hui noticed when he looked up, so he grabbed the swaying flower branch and patted Ning Yixiao's face.

Ning Yixiao also came back to his senses, and followed suit, holding the flower stem and sweeping Su Hui's face with the flower, but unexpectedly, Su Hui bit the blue-purple flower directly.

He bit off a few petals, put them close to Ning Yixiao's ear, and blowing, the petals fell to his collar.

Suddenly, a voice came, followed by footsteps.

"Master, Miss is back."

Su Hui frowned and stood up, "Why are you back..."

"Your mother?" Ning Yixiao also stood up, "I'll go back first."

Su Hui was a little irritable, frowned and thought for a while, but still reluctant, grabbed his wrist.

At this moment, the sound of high heels came, stepping on the cobblestone road, and soon, a figure in a long purple dress appeared on the garden path.

"Su Hui." Ji Yanan came closer, and when he saw Ning Yixiao, he changed into a friendly smile, "Did you bring friends over? Why didn't you say anything?"

Su Hui had no choice but to briefly introduce, "This is Ning Yixiao."

Ji Yanan came over and said with a smile, "Hi, I'm Su Hui's mother."

Ning Yixiao nodded slightly, "Hello, Auntie."

"He's much taller than Xiao Hui." Ji Yanan smiled, "Let's stay and have dinner together."

Ning Yixiao subconsciously wanted to refuse, "I'd better not bother..."

"Why do you call this an interruption? It's the first time for Xiao Hui to bring a friend home. If you want to have a meal, do you have any taboos? What do you like to eat?" She asked a lot, and Ning Yixiao said no, everything is fine.

"Okay. Xiaohui, take Yixiao to your room for a while, and then mom will call you." After speaking, Ji Yanan turned and went back.

Ning Yixiao looked at her back and thanked her politely, "Thank you, Auntie."

Ji Yanan turned around again and smiled, "You're welcome, just treat it as being at home."

Her generosity made Ning Yixiao fall into contemplation. This house is beautiful, with beautiful gardens, exquisite decorations and servants. Su Hui also has a warm and friendly mother, and everything runs counter to the place where he lives.

Ning Yixiao can't do it, and it's impossible to treat this place as his home.