[Comprehensive] How to pretend to be a victim?

Since the "Three-Day Disappearance Case", Chen Shuyao's daily task is to study how to prevent Sherlock from approaching her, and how to apply the theory to practice.Whether he can solve the case or not, and whether he knows the cause of his death, are all floating clouds, okay?The most important thing is to save your life!

So... One night, after Sherlock finished washing, he pushed open the bedroom door and was hit by someone with a shoehorn on his shoulder.

"From today onwards, you are still sleeping in the living room, and you are not allowed to step into the bedroom at any time when I am in the bedroom!"

"I don't think the stick in your hand is of any use. If I do this..." Sherlock turned sideways, took a step forward, and stood beside Chen Shuyao, "Just dodge it, right?"

Just as Chen Shuyao was dazed, he walked back to the original place after speaking: "No matter in terms of quick thinking, observation ability or action ability, it is obvious that I am far ahead of you. In the same room, you can't escape .If you want to lock yourself in the bedroom, that's fine with me, but it's obviously useless. I used to pick people's locks when I solved the crime."

After finishing speaking, he squeezed his eyes and slightly hooked the corners of his mouth.

"..."

How could he say such a thing so confidently?The point is, she was powerless to refute.

Chen Shuyao held back for a long while before replying harmlessly: "But you have to consider my feelings anyway?"

Sherlock froze for a moment: "In this respect, I think I'm doing a good job. The average foreplay is 15 minutes each time, and it doesn't start until you are |wet|wet enough. And I basically use recognized The woman's favorite posture|position..."

"Stop!" Chen Shuyao felt that her ears were already blind, and her brain was already watts due to the high temperature.

Do you have to make these things so clear? !

"You're shy."

"no!"

"Scientific studies have shown that women will become more and more fond of this kind of piston|piston|sport|sport after being exposed to it. I think you just haven't adapted to it. Maybe..."

Seeing Chen Shuyao retreating quickly, and slamming the door with a "bang", Sherlock froze in place.

"Wrong? Impossible, how could something in the memory palace be wrong?"

Chen Shuyao leaned against the door and shouted: "Mr. Holmes outside the door, your memory palace can be cleaned up. I don't want to see you now, and I don't want to listen to you..."

Then she heard the sound of something | poking | entering | the keyhole, and before she could react, there was a "click" sound behind her, and her and her dear door were pushed open like someone pushing earth.When she turned around, Sherlock was already lying on the bed with his eyes closed, as if he had entered the tranquility of sleep.

"Get up." Chen Shuyao rolled up his sleeves, grabbed his arm and dragged it down.However, someone seemed to be glued to the bed, she tried hard, but he could only move less than a centimeter.She was so angry that she threw his arm to the side of the bed, "How can you be such a rascal? Okay, you won't leave, will you?"

Seeing that Sherlock was still motionless, she leaned over and pulled the pillow: "Then you sleep well, I'll go to the living room."

As soon as the words fell, and before she stood up straight, Sherlock pulled her arm. With a little force from him, she lay directly on his chest. The next moment, she was already tightly held by him, and she raised her eyes to meet him Serious gaze.

"Don't you like me sleeping with my arms around you and saying good night and good morning to you every day?" Before she could answer, Sherlock took the plush toy pig by the bed and compared it to his face, "Obviously, I'm more functional than it." A lot, right?"

Chen Shuyao rolled his eyes at him, but couldn't help chuckling: "It's you, what do you think?"

In the past N days and nights, she just thought of it as Sherlock, holding him tightly in her arms to satisfy her greed.Of course she hopes to fall asleep in his arms, but the problem is that he is like... She can't stand it.

"Although a pig is a very smart animal, I don't think it is comparable to me." Sherlock looked at the pig in his hand, frowned slightly, thought for a while, and then turned to look at her, "Is there any?" ?”

Chen Shuyao couldn't help laughing, and grabbed the pig: "Give it back to me."

Then he pointed at its nose and glanced at Sherlock secretly, "Piggy, let me tell you, no matter how hungry you are, you can't eat a cow at one go. You can divide the cow into many days to eat. For example, every day... Ah bah, eating a meal of beef every once in a while, not only supplements nutrition, satisfies one's needs, but also won't feel tired, right?"

"Theoretically speaking, an adult pig can't beat an adult cow no matter how big or small, so the possibility of eating the whole cow is zero, and there is no problem of eating a meal. Of course, there are differences between domestic pigs and wild boars. The attack will be stronger, if you hit one more..."

"..."

I'm not talking about pigs and cows at all, okay?Sure enough, you can't go round and round when talking to straight men. You think you've already made it obvious, but they are still like ducks to listen to thunder.

Chen Shuyao took a group of deep breaths, and finally calmed down: "I mean, you can't just keep doing it just because you think about it."

Sherlock frowned slightly: "Which one?"

She is really going crazy. Does he have to say that word herself before he can understand?

"That's what you've been doing lately!"

Sherlock couldn't help laughing when she saw her face flushed and she was about to jump in a hurry.

"You're still laughing!" Chen Shuyao pursed her mouth, she put her hands on his chest and was about to sit up, "I want to abandon you decisively, we can't be friends anymore."

"Who wants to be your friend?"

Sherlock held her wrist and slowly placed it behind his neck. She managed to hold on for a few seconds but fell into his arms. He wrapped one arm around her waist, and rubbed her hair with the other hand, the corners of his mouth slightly curled up. : "When you are Mrs. Holmes, you can't lose your temper at every turn."

Chen Shuyao stared blankly at his eyes, blinked her eyes, her cheeks gradually blushed, her heart was already filled with sweetness and warmth, but she still said stiffly: "I haven't promised you yet."

"Oh, you seem to have misunderstood. I didn't mean to propose to you."

"...I still want to sleep on the sofa." Chen Shuyao glanced at him, then struggled to leave, but was still suppressed by Sherlock's arms, he got up and turned off the light, and lifted the quilt to cover the two of them.

In the darkness, there was a warm feeling on her forehead, as if a charm was attached to the forehead of a zombie, and she instantly calmed down.

"I'm sending you a notice, how can a marriage proposal be so hasty."

Chen Shuyao breathed a sigh of relief, and rubbed her arms into his arms, with a smile on the corner of her mouth: "Watson told you?"

"Oh my God, why do you think so? I admit that he did study|deep|deep|deep|deep|deep|deep|in women before me, but with my ability, it's not difficult to catch up with him..."

Chen Shuyao couldn't help chuckling, raised her head and kissed his lips lightly: "Say good night."

Sherlock was stunned for a moment: "Good night, Shuyao."

"Good night, Curly."

In the silence, the two hugged each other silently, and their breathing gradually stabilized.

A ray of sunlight poked his head through the edge of the curtain in the morning, Sherlock slowly opened his eyes, the arm that was being pillowed by someone was already numb, he looked down and saw that the person in his arms was still asleep, and gently lifted her wrapped around her. The hair around the mouth, the corners of the mouth slowly raised.

He never thought that they could have a peaceful night, just embracing each other and falling asleep.But this feeling doesn't seem to be bad.

Lying like this for a long time, Chen Shuyao still has no intention of waking up, and he has already reviewed most of the books stored in his memory palace.In desperation, he had no choice but to lightly |probe|into|into the gap between her neck and the bed with his hand, and slowly raised her head, but just as his arm was withdrawn halfway, he saw her frowning, and hurriedly rubbed her into his arms again. rubbed.

Just not knowing what to do, there was a knock on the door.

Knowing that there was no hope of sneaking away, Sherlock patted her on the cheek: "Wake up."

I saw Chen Shuyao was in a daze, opened his eyes slightly, and looked up at him: "En?"

Then, he hugged his neck, put his head on his neck, and his breathing gradually became steady again.

Hearing the knock on the door getting more and more urgent, Sherlock had no choice but to pull her hand away: "There is a knock on the door, I'll go and have a look."

Sherlock adjusted his pajamas, got out of bed, walked to the door, and was about to open the door when he vaguely saw a person standing outside the window who seemed to be holding a gun.

He held the doorknob's hand, gradually clenched it, and suddenly pulled it away.

"It's not a clear choice to shoot here..." Sherlock frowned and looked at Watson who was holding the child in front of him. , the child is holding a real|pist|gun-shaped water|gun in his hand.

The blond-haired and blue-eyed kid spit out bubbles, turned around and looked around, but aimed the water gun at Sherlock, and then made two "beeps", and the water flowed down Sherlock's curly hair. Drip.

Sherlock frowned and opened his eyes, raised his hand to sip the water from his face: "John, have you started studying children recently? If so, I might kick you out of Baker Street."

"Oh no, of course not. This is Aunt Anna's youngest son. Today Anna promised that she would take care of him, but Anna and I are planning to go out for a picnic, so it's inconvenient to take him, so..."

"Even if a little kid will disturb your date, then you should go downstairs to find Mrs. Hudson. Although she has no children, I believe she will be able to do this well. Bye." Sherlock With a hook at the corner of his mouth, he was about to close the door, but Watson blocked it with his leg.

"Sherlock, Mrs. Hudson just isn't here today..."

"What about Jasmine? If you can't do it, you can find Lestrade. Scotland Yard is lacking innocence." Sherlock suddenly realized, pointing his index finger in the air, "Oh, by the way, I almost forgot about Donovan, maybe she can be there. Gain some parenting experience before marriage."

Watson frowned and stared at him: "Sherlock, I thought you were my best friend."

"In theory yes, but the scoring thing."

"So you just watch my good date get disrupted by a kid?"

Sherlock shrugged disapprovingly: "Who stipulates that watching the children at home and watching TV is not a date?"

"Sherlock!"

"It's early in the morning, what are you arguing about?"

The two followed the sound and saw Chen Shuyao standing behind Sherlock, stretching comfortably.

In the next 1 minute, seeing the completely different and very rich expressions of the two, Chen Shuyao was stunned: "Did something happen?"

The author has something to say: Juan stopped Chen: I have already decided to sever my friendship with the person outside the door.

List:? ? ?

The next day's Daily: Exposed!The same-sex couple who used to spread dog food for many years now go their separate ways because of the children. Is this the loss of humanity or the lack of morality?

Chen, slapped the editor-in-chief's face with a slipper: I'm your sister!