Donggong: If Li Chengyin remembered first

What I wanted for a long time is finally available at my fingertips, but I feel that everything has become meaningless.Xiaofeng asked me if I wanted to be emperor.

No one has ever asked me such a strange question.

In the whole world, only this position is the most honorable, who wouldn't want to sit on it?

Since I was sensible, everything I have done, big and small, calculations, conquests, intrigues, open and secret fights, are all for this seat.

But now, the Zen Edict is in his hand.One step away, but I hesitated and stopped.

It's like facing an abyss.

In the past, I only thought it was difficult to be the crown prince. I lived in the shadow of swords and swords every day.But I never hesitated, never timid.Maybe... since there is nothing more to lose, there is nothing to be afraid of.

No matter what is waiting for me in front of me, I still have to go forward.

Those who have no way out naturally have no choice.

What now?

Maybe it's because of the few steps on this road that once made me hesitate and never look back, mixed with Xiaofeng's blood and tears, it made my heart tremble every step of the way.

Hard-hearted and cold-blooded... It seems that Xiaofeng will die.There are gaps in the ice that melt and loosen in the heart, and a little bit of light can shine in, making people warm and cowardly, making people feel the traces of happiness even when they are at the tip of a knife, and they will be nostalgic in their hearts and reluctant to part with it. , He hesitated, He hesitated.

After summer, the weather gets hotter day by day.Xiaofeng's stomach is also bulging day by day, even wearing a skirt, she still looks very pregnant.She often couldn't sleep well and was heavy. She was always uncomfortable whether she was sitting or lying down, and she had to call for help when turning over.In addition, my appetite is not very good, and I eat less.The whole person is sick.

Yong Niang thought of countless ways, but nothing worked.

How can this stand?

I never knew it was so difficult for a woman to be pregnant.I wish I could replace it with my body.I look forward to this summer passing by quickly, and when the baby is born in autumn, everything will be fine, right?

After beating A'Du and leaving, she talked less.Tong Yongniang is still willing to say a few words, but with me, there are fewer and fewer.She often just leans on the imperial concubine's couch and looks out the door in a daze, then becomes quiet and silent, which makes me worried.

The relationship between us seems to be as fragile as a spider's thread.

The more anxious you are, the slower your days pass.Before, Xiaofeng could support people to go around, but in July, her belly became bigger again, her legs were a little swollen, and even going out for a walk in the yard was very difficult.

For the sake of uneasiness, a large group of Gong'e imperial physicians followed her inside and out.But when there were too many people, I was in a hurry, and I still couldn't feel relieved.After leaving her sight for a second, I can't wait to ask her if she is okay.

I simply moved all the memorials of the ministers into the bedroom, and watched Gu Xiaofeng from time to time, watched her eat, and watched her sleep.

If you are not busy, you can play Shuanglu and Leaf cards with her.At first I always win and she is not happy.I let her win and told her to win every time, but she was still not happy.I learned how to be good, and in the three rounds, I always told her to win two rounds and lose one round, and it seemed that she could continue to play.But she was still unhappy, and she was a little lost in thought while playing.With both hands gently holding the golden wrong knife at his waist, it seems that many things are hidden in his heart, and no one can talk about them.

I know she misses A'Du.

I sent many people to look for it, but there was no news at all.A'Du seemed to evaporate from the world, and disappeared with Gu Jian.

I looked at Xiaofeng's dazed look, and I was glad that I didn't make up my mind to kill A'Du that day.She is still alive, so she will come back one day.Xiaofeng's hope is not so pitiful.

Gradually, I also looked forward to A'Du's return.

When it came to the Qixi Festival, as in previous years, the palace chose a high-rise building, tied it with brocade and colorful decorations, and offered seasonal melons and fruits, and waited for the dinner to watch the stars and beg for cleverness.

Xiaofeng moved lazily and refused to go upstairs.She doesn't like the Qiqiao Festival, because on this day, not only can she not sneak out of the palace to mess around, but she also has to pass a colorful thread through nine needle holes in one go, which she can't pass every year, and even the Cowherd and Weaver Girl are disgusting.

"Just catch a few more spiders to weave a web. Why do we have to race through the eye of a needle... The candle is so dark, and the eye of the needle is so small... You have to go through nine of them at once..."

Yong Niang brought a needle with a large hole to hold the sole of the shoe, and said: "Niang Niang, practice your hands first."

Xiaofeng took the needle and thread, twisted and twirled the end of the thread, and passed two of them, but the third one couldn't get in anyway. She tugged anxiously, and the two she had put on came loose again.She was so angry that she immediately threw the thread away.

Yong Niang picked it up, and said: "Otherwise it will be the same as in previous years, the slaves and maidservants are dressed in advance, and the empress just pretends."

Xiaofeng frowned again, "The queen always takes the lead every year, so no one cares about me... This year..."

I put down the memorial and said, "It doesn't matter, even if you spend all night sewing, no one dares to be faster than you."

When she heard it, she glanced at me, said nothing, took the needle and thread from Yong Niang's hand, and started to thread it again.Following Yong Niang's example, she lightly dipped her fingertips in saliva and twisted the end of the thread thinly, while muttering in a low voice: "I don't want to be so ashamed..."

The Jin Tower is set up, and I will carry her up.She hugged my neck carefully, for fear of pressing on my stomach.I couldn't relax, and I was sweating profusely before I went upstairs.

"Li Chengyin..."

"Ok?"

"Is it heavy? Or I'd better go by myself."

I tightened my hands, pretended to weigh it, and said, "It's very heavy."

She struggled to get down, I smiled slightly, and then said: "Xiaofeng, you and the child are more important than anything else in my heart."

She froze for a moment, and I had already stepped on the steps.Amidst the creaking of the wooden stairs, she suddenly buried her head in my neck, and said to herself, "You are always so deceitful."

I stopped, and as soon as the creaking sound disappeared, there was a sudden silence between heaven and earth.I looked at her seriously, lowered my head, and kissed her gently.

After a while, I let go of her and said, "Then...will you believe me?"

Her eyes averted.Silence fell between us again.

Conversations like this have happened several times.It ends in silence.

I am not in a hurry.

I just want her to be by my side all the time.

But today, when I lifted my foot and was about to finish the remaining few steps, she suddenly sighed and said: "Li Chengyin, believe it or not, I seem to be... only you."

That sounded terribly sad.

My heart stings.

After walking the remaining few steps, I carefully put her down and said, "Xiaofeng, I am just like you. In this world, I only have you."

I leaned on her belly and said softly: "The emperor is always lonely. But if you can always be by my side, I won't feel it. In the future...we will have our children...if he is born a boy , then we only want this one child. He will be the unique prince in the future, there is no need to fight or grab, the world will be his. If... it's a girl, that's even better, we can have another... Well! Xiaofeng! He kicked me!"

Xiaofeng covered the place all of a sudden, with a little shyness and tenderness on his face.

I reached out and wrapped her whole body in my arms, as if the whole world was wrapped in my arms, that is, the whole world was wrapped in my arms.

"Xiaofeng", I murmured, "Xiaofeng..."

I think it's too tiring to greet and send off, and there are only female relatives in the palace during the Qiqiao Festival.The emperor's father gave himself the edict of the Zen position, and he almost lived a life of not going out of the door, not going out of the second door, not stepping out of the world, and not asking about world affairs.Today he had dinner as usual, greeted Xiaofeng a few words, and then left.All the concubines also left, only the Empress Dowager, smiling and watching Xiaofeng clumsily thread the needles one by one towards the moon.

After she managed to pass through all nine needles, the Empress Dowager praised her repeatedly, boasting that there are heavens and earths, she is even more dexterous than Gong'e in the embroidery room in the palace, Xiao Feng couldn't hold her face anymore.

I said: "Emperor Grandmother, take a look, are the cracks on my ground big enough?"

The Empress Dowager was taken aback for a moment, and said, "Okay, what are you doing?"

"You boast that Xiaofeng is going to find a crack in the ground to get in. She has a big belly, so why not find a bigger crack in the ground?"

Everyone laughed, and Xiao Feng immediately covered her cheeks with both hands to relax her facial muscles.

I handed her the mung bean soup to cool off the heat, and said, "Are you tired?"

She shook her head, hugged her belly, carefully changed her sitting position, and straightened her curled legs a little.I quietly approached, and kneaded her for a while.She was a bit shy, as if she was afraid of being seen, she shrank her feet, and I immediately grabbed her ankles to stop her from moving.

The candle flames flickered, and her cheeks turned red all of a sudden.

They threaded needles and threads, placed Qiaoguo on the terrace, extinguished the candles and burned incense, and each of them silently thought about the moon.

Xiaofeng is next to me.As soon as the candle was extinguished, the moonlight shone on her face, which was as white as jade.Eyebrows downcast, gentle and amiable.

I don't know what she asked for.

But I solemnly knelt down, facing the begging moon, and quietly said in my heart:

Begging for the love of the two to be happy, to be able to guard the four seasons, to get the son early, and to be safe with the mother and child.

Three prayers.

It was rare for Xiaofeng to be in a happy mood. Seeing me bowing three times solemnly, she pestered me and asked me what I was begging for.

I smiled, raised my eyebrows and teased, "I beg Empress Zhinu to send me another beauty like you."

When she heard it, she turned her face away and pretended to look at the moon, and ignored me.

The candles were lit again, everyone ate the Qiaoguo, caught the spider and put it in a small box, and then they talked and laughed.

It was late at night, and the wind blew a little bit of coolness.Xiaofeng was already yawning, I carried her back, and before entering the hall, the breathing in my arms became steady.

I don't sleep so well in bed on weekdays.I held her and stood in the courtyard for a while, when a few fireflies flew out of the hall.

Today's gift is probably in vain.I thought to myself.

After opening the curtain and entering, the room is full of fluorescent lights, which can be clearly seen even without a candle.

I found a bed and sat down gently, just hugging her like this.Yong Niang found a thin blanket to wrap Xiao Feng around, and went out lightly.There is no one else in the room.Xiaofeng's breathing was deep and steady in my ears. I watched the fireflies fly up and down, and felt that the stars lingered in time forever, as if all the lost things were found, all the cracks were mended, and the soul was suddenly complete at this moment.

Xiaofeng slept peacefully, I don't know how long it has passed, my arms have completely lost consciousness, and there are one or two cock crows in the distance.Is it almost four o'clock?

Xiaofeng woke up suddenly, snorted twice, opened his eyes and saw a room of fireflies, dazed for a while, and then gently stretched out his hand to touch.As if he was afraid of scaring something away, he was cautious and cautious.

As soon as she stretched out her hand, several fireflies flew up and landed elsewhere.I got up to chase, only to realize that it was not like a dream, and turned to look at me.

"Xiao Feng, do you like it?"

She looked at me, then at the fireflies.Softly said: "Li Chengyin, am I dreaming?"

I got up and wrapped my arms around her waist from behind, and reached out to catch a firefly and put it in front of her. With one hand, the firefly flew up like a fleeting meteor.

"Xiaofeng, I caught a hundred fireflies for you. Sing a song for me, okay?"

She didn't seem to hear me, she still stretched out her hand, and the firefly was lingering in her hand, illuminating her cheek from time to time.

I waited patiently for her to speak, and sang the little fox sitting on the sand dunes.I had already tuned it up in my mind, when she suddenly turned around, put her arms around my waist, and tied up her belt.Just like when we got married in the desert.

The Turkic priest sang festive hymns in my mind, and I remembered that day, she tied a belt full of gems and emeralds on me, with a shy and joyful expression, the most beautiful appearance I have ever seen.I have forgotten how hard-hearted and cold-hearted I was. When the wedding was only halfway through, before she could tie the belt for me, I encircled the Yue clan and fought fiercely all night to destroy the entire Turkic clan.

Thinking of these terrible things at this moment, it seems like a lifetime ago.

I don't know if I don't know my past self or my present self.

In short, I untied my belt and tied it on Xiaofeng with the speed of thunder and jingle, as if I was too late for a second.

"Xiaofeng, you are the only wife I love deeply in this life."

The author has something to say:

stay up late bald