as pure as a radish

This is the first time I face death?I started to play the slideshow in my head, and the first time I should have seen a bloody little dead baby taken out of Yu Ting's womb.At that time, I was so frightened that my hands and feet were cold and I trembled intermittently. Facing the question of the weird doctor asking us if we wanted the dead baby, I just shook my head frantically. .The most recent one was Xiaobai.is it damnI know some people say yes and some say no.But shouldn't the crux of the problem be why people should decide whether they deserve to die or not? !

"Hey." Wen Yue called me, "Are you okay?"

Of course I'm not good, besides sadness and anger, there are some very strong emotions surging up, but what do these have to do with Wen Yue.He loves them too, and he already feels sorry for himself, so should I dump my emotional garbage on him?

I just looked at the time, "You leave work so early today? Isn't it nine o'clock on weekdays?"

"Go and drink something." Wen Yue jumped to other topics faster than me.He walked two steps away, remembered something, and turned around, "I forgot to ask... is it convenient for you?"

After buying a few cans of beer at the convenience store, I invited him over to mine.In this cold and twelfth lunar month, you can't stand on the road and drink with the cold wind.

As soon as the door was opened, a smell of stale air that had been stuffy for a long time came out.

"I'm going to open a window." I changed my shoes and went straight to the window.Not only the air, the slippers, tabletops, and window sills have accumulated thin dust.

Opening the windows of the bedroom and kitchen and returning to the living room, Wen Yue was not idle, and he didn't know where he found the rag, and was bending over to wipe the coffee table.

"I invite you to drink, and you don't do the housework." I walked up to take the rag.

Wen Yue didn't give it to me, "The sofa has been cleaned up, you can sit wherever you want."

I pouted, "Hey, this is my house..."

Wen Yue buried her head in wiping the table, without any intention of stopping.It's useless to say more, let's do it.In this way, the two of us spent about half an hour tidying up the house.

After tidying up, I slumped on the sofa and opened a can of beer. The wine was no longer cold, and it was almost lukewarm after half an hour in the heating room.But at this moment, I am not here to taste wine, it is enough to quench my thirst and paralyze myself.

Seeing Wen Yue sitting aside stupidly, I opened a can and pushed it to him, "If you don't want to drink, you only have plain water."

Wen Yue only took a sip and put the beer can back on the coffee table, "What's the world, it's not enough to bully people, but also to bully animals."

Well, that's the topic of the night. "Can I still go and see Xiaobai?" I was wondering if Wenyue buried Xiaobai under a certain tree and made a mark or something.

"The corpse was taken away on the spot." Wen Yue blinked frequently, and I'm not sure if he was holding back tears. "I've inquired about it, but I didn't get any definite information. Some people said that they would be dragged to a certain place and buried in a centralized place, while others said they were all killed, they were not poisonous, and they would definitely be sold."

"Death is not enough to make people satisfied. You have to die badly enough to make people feel comfortable." I glanced at a bag of unopened dog food on the opposite wall, "You have to eat when you buy something, otherwise... ..."

My phone vibrated suddenly, and while I took out the phone and saw the word Liu Ziyun, I remembered that I should call Liu Ziyun tonight.

After we each asked what the other was doing, I walked into the bedroom with my phone in hand.It's not that I have any intimate words to tell Liu Ziyun. After all, I can't even control my own grief and anger at this juncture. It is too demanding to flirt, but I always want to say a few more words to Liu Ziyun, in front of others. It's never polite to talk face to face for too long on the phone.

Liu Ziyun said a few intimate words at first, but probably because of my cold response, she soon switched to explaining some family affairs to me, and our call ended after explaining.I put down my phone, but didn't go out immediately. I sat by the bed and stared blankly for a long time.

After a while, the emotion fell into the abyss, and I couldn't pull it back.

"You..." Wen Yue suddenly came to the bedroom to look for me.

I hurriedly turned my back and wiped the corners of my eyes.

"...Is it because of Xiaobai?" Wen Yue asked slowly.

"A lot." I tried to speak, but I didn't expect that the crying sound was quite obvious, so I quickly shut my mouth.

Wen Yue: "Are you always like this?"

I didn't dare to make any more noises casually. If I still looked miserable and weak, it would be a funny thing.

Wen Yue: "Speak clearly, as if you have seen everything, but actually..."

Before I opened my mouth, I adjusted my breath several times and cleared my throat secretly, "Actually, I'm a coward." I realized that my eyes should not be so red, and I turned back to face Wen Yue. Anyway, I have to face it sooner or later, "Yes, I will In this way, you can talk, do, and can't do it. Ordinary people, how can they be considered ordinary people if they are not bad."

"Why do you say that about yourself?" Wen Yue asked me in turn.

"Didn't you say it first?" I replied.

Wen Yue: "What I want to say and what you understand don't mean the same thing at all."

Me: "Then what do you want to say?"

Wen Yue opened her mouth to speak, but held back. After a while, he said, "It doesn't mean the same thing anyway."

"What do you mean by not being the same?" I followed him, but I quickly realized that we were arguing like this, but what are we arguing about?Is it because you feel uncomfortable and vent your anger through arguing?This is probably the only reasonable explanation.This is even more pathetic. When things go wrong, they are unable to seek revenge from stronger perpetrators. They can only quarrel with each other to vent their anger on the same weak or weaker ones. Oh, what a typical loser style. "Forget it, pretend I didn't say it." I planned to let the quarrel stop on my side.

"Are you angry?" Wen Yue continued.

I walked out of the bedroom, followed by Wen Yue.Picking up the unfinished beer can on the coffee table, I poured another sip into my stomach.The beer is sweet, and this is a taste that adults can only taste. I let this taste stay in my mouth for a while, and then said, "No. At least not to you. It's not that you killed Xiaobai, what can I do You are angry. Besides, Xiaobai is dead, and you are not in a good mood, why should I be angry at a person who is in a bad mood. "

Wen Yue has been listening to me, until I finished the last word, he was still waiting, and after a while, he moved the corner of his mouth slightly, "No...Is there anything else?"

"What else?" I felt his question was a bit inexplicable.

Wen Yue looked at the ground and raised her head, "For me, other things, feelings."

I understood in an instant, but really... is that really the case?how could be?When did it start?Am I so slow?Still... I want to overthrow what I suddenly understood just now, because if that happens, everything will become complicated.