[Comprehensive manga] Ruiguang

At this moment, I almost forgot how to breathe. On my mother’s gentle face, I actually felt that expression made my back chill. The mother with such an expression was so strange that she would call me Ah Chun’s weakness woman.

Just like the pale main color in the ward, the mother's expression was filled with inexplicable gloom.Even though the corners of her mouth were raised slightly, that smile was not as gentle as before.Following her gaze, which was like a two-edged cold front, I slowly lowered my gaze, and in her hand...

It was a knife with the same cold luster as her gaze.

I couldn't help widening my eyes, and let out a soft gasp in surprise, which was infinitely magnified in the quiet ward.

Mother's attention was quickly removed from the knife in her hand, and in the next second, she became dazed again, and gradually looked at me standing outside the door with dull eyes.

"Ah Chun, you are here."

The soft tone is like what I saw a second ago, all are unreal phantoms.

I couldn't put on a fake smile on my froze expression for a long time, but just stood at the door in a daze, feeling awkward.

"Ah Chun, are you upset?" My mother asked me softly, she was still holding the knife that was still reflecting the cold light in her hand, as if it was just an ordinary thing that could be completely ignored.

"Mom..." I called out in a catered manner, without saying anything else.He walked into the ward with his head down, repeated the formulaic action of closing the door, then put his schoolbag on the chair by the wall, and sat down in front of his mother's bed.

I really couldn't make a smirk expression, my mind was so messed up that my head felt a little swollen and painful, and the corners of my mouth were so sour that I couldn't lift it up anymore.I couldn't take my attention away from the knife in my mother's hand, and her nonchalant appearance, I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Ah Chun, how about peeling an apple?" My mother pointed to the apples in the bag on the low cabinet with some peeling paint at the head of the bed, and then stuffed the knife into my hand.

There was still the warmth of her mother's palm on the handle, and she should have held it tightly, so tightly that she didn't even realize that the warmth of her palm had stained the handle.

If my mother's behavior is normal, I shouldn't think of other aspects.It’s just that I was discussing with Pu Xia about the incident more than half a year ago, and my mind was already fixed on the absolute problem with my mother, which made it impossible for me to ignore every detail of her.

In an instant, I felt aggrieved in my heart. If what I wanted to protect for so long was suddenly told to be a big lie, I couldn't imagine how I would feel after that.Now just having such speculation has shaken me, even if I keep hypnotizing myself that it will never happen.

"Okay." I really couldn't pretend to be nonchalant, so I could only lower my head and try to hide my expression.He took the knife, responded in a low voice, and silently took out an apple from the bag, "I'll go wash it."

The pool is in the other direction of the corridor, which is one of the reasons why the area around the mother's ward is always so deserted.I took a knife and an apple, and walked out of the ward as if evading.

Self-righteously weaving all kinds of lies in front of my mother, making her feel that I don’t need to worry about my life, but I never thought that I might be wrapped in bigger lies, and there is no reason for being exposed from the beginning to the end , Probably the same as my original intention, burying is also a disguised form of protection... I understand it this way, after all, it is impossible for my mother to do anything to hurt me, just like I love her.

When I came out of the ward, I happened to meet Dr. Watanabe. I walked in a hurry and almost bumped into him with my head down.

"Oh, Junko-san, there is something I want to tell you." In order to distinguish me from my mother, Watanabe called me by my name directly.When he called me to stop, his expression was very serious, and my mood also sank along with his expression.

He motioned to me to walk away from the ward, then stopped, and said in a solemn tone similar to his expression: "Junzi-san, your mother's recent physical condition is not very optimistic."

"But her spirit looks pretty good..."

"There is no problem mentally." Watanabe said, frowning slowly between his brows, and then raised his hand to compare the position closer to the armpit than the left chest, "It is here, there is a lump, the nurse has already discovered it during the examination There is nipple discharge, and she didn't find out in time before that, it seems that she is deliberately concealing it."

"Milk...discharge? What's that?"

"This kind of symptom... In simple terms, it's breast cancer... In the current situation, the early treatment time has been missed."

"Then...then does she know about herself?"

"I didn't tell her the specific cause of the disease, but I should be the most aware of her physical condition. I mentioned surgery to her before, but she seemed unwilling to accept it, so Junko-san, I hope you can persuade her, It is better to perform this operation as soon as possible.”

After Watanabe told me about this, he left first.I just felt that my brain was buzzing, as if I couldn't even think.

I walked to the sink and turned on the faucet, and the cold water rushed over the apple in my hand, but I seemed to have lost the sense of touch, and I was numb in a daze.Whether it was the incident or the current physical condition of my mother, any one of them forced me to almost collapse, and I couldn't control my whole body trembling.

There was soreness deep in my nasal cavity, I bit my lips tightly, trying to suppress the pain and sorrow that was about to burst out from the bottom of my heart.In the end, these emotions did not pass through the defense wall in the bottom of my heart, turned into tears, and overflowed from the eye sockets unstoppably.

I wanted to cry loudly to vent it, but I didn't dare to make any sound, I just sobbed dully.I tried my best to hold back my voice, and bit my lips tightly, even though they were already pale.

Suddenly, a pair of hands hugged me, and there was warmth on my back.That is the embrace I am familiar with, with a hug full of affection that I have not experienced for a long time.

"Ah Chun." My mother's lips leaned against my ear, and her words were as light as a feather brushing against my ears.

Since my mother was left in my world, I never dared to show sadness in front of her. I was afraid and painful, and I would just hide in the darkness without saying a word.

"Mom...why did you come out of the ward?" I suppressed my sobs, but my voice was already trembling uncontrollably.

"A Chun washes apples for too long, I'm worried." My mother said, tightening her arms around me.

This kind of hug broke me even more. The grievances accumulated in my heart for a long time broke out in an instant, and I cried even more uselessly.

"If I make Ah Chun feel pain, then mother will help you eliminate these pains." The clear words and breaths are completely unlike what a person who has had a mental breakdown and has broken away from the realm of ordinary people can say.

Holding my breath, I took my mother's hand, pulled away from her arms, and turned to face her.I couldn't understand what she was trying to express, so I just looked at her quietly without saying a word.

What my mother said next surprised me even more.

"That police officer came to see me not long ago."

It turned out that in the end, I was the one who had been kept in the dark.

I looked into my mother's eyes, and my vision was hazy.All the mixed emotions in my heart turned into tears.I just kept crying, not knowing what to say, and unable to say anything.

"That police officer, Puxia, told me a lot about you...Ah Chun, I'm really... really, really sorry for you."

The only chance I can think of for Puxia to meet my mother was when I met Puxia in the hospital not long ago, and he told me that my mother did not have an alibi.I thought he hadn't seen his mother.

For my mother's apology, I shook my head vigorously.I don't want to hear her apology to me, let alone know her connection with the incident.I hope it will still be the same as before. I will be an ordinary high school student who may be a bit difficult in obscurity, and she will recuperate in the hospital with peace of mind. Until one day, she and I can go to see the sea of ​​Kanagawa once.

"Ah Chun... If I say, I still love Changzhi, will you hate me?"

I thought my mother would tell me about the murder more than half a year ago, she should know something.But I didn't expect that she actually talked about that man with me.

I can't understand what kind of emotion the love in my mother's mouth is, but I can imagine that it should be a kind of warmth similar to family affection but with subtle differences.But for a mother who said that, I couldn't believe it.

Is it worth loving for a man who dares to bring his mistress home in a fair manner?I can say unequivocally that I hate him enough to kill him.

"I...I can't forgive that woman for killing Changzhi..." The mother narrated in a low voice, as if she had also been touched by some painful past, her voice trembled violently, "I was thinking , After that, I committed suicide... But, Ah Chun, I still have you, I can't bear you..."

My mother was the murderer of Mayu, she told me herself.

The second the lie is broken is the precursor to the collapse of the heart.Not only did I think I was lying to my mother, but I was also lying to myself.In fact, after watching the surveillance video at the police station, I had such a vague premonition in my heart, but I kept avoiding things I didn't want to accept.

"Liar." I choked up and uttered a few broken words in my mouth, "Liar..."

"If you have a mental problem, you can escape the punishment... That incident was finally settled as a robbery, and no one was involved..."

The mother's mental disorder is completely pretending.The reason why she was diagnosed in Tokyo was that she collapsed for a while, but after coming to Kanagawa, she has long since returned to normal.

The result of that incident did not involve anyone, but it was also because of this that my situation became embarrassing, and everyone pointed at me as a murderer.I killed my father, and my mother went crazy, because I am a murderer, so I deserve what I deserve...

I thought about it before, compared to Aihara Masaoyuki and Mayu, I hate killing them more and making me the real culprit of the so-called "murderer".When the murderer and mother scratched the equal sign, the world I had been trying to survive just collapsed.

I cried so much that I couldn't feel the real emotions anymore, what I had was just the real feeling that my chest was hurting like hell.

Watanabe came back from the rounds and saw my mother and I, he just nodded to me politely, out of respect, he didn't approach us.Presumably, he thought I was just grieving for my mother's illness.

In my mother's narration, I didn't hear her mention any information about Ayu Shibai at all.

She did go to the bungalow that night and killed Mayu, but all she saw was Mayu and Aihara Masaoyuki's bodies covered in blood.This is different from what I and Urashita deduced, so what my mother saw was probably the scene where Mayu was dealing with the scene after letting Ayu go.

There is a dark corner in everyone's heart, and the sickness is in this dark bottom. When the wall of the heart collapses, the sickness will be like darkness, swallowing up the purity of the heart.

Mother didn't do anything... Ayu was the culprit.Suddenly this thought came to me.