[Net King] Take away my heart

stop all the clocks, cut off the phone

Muted the piano, with muffled drums

Lift out the coffin, let the mourners come

Let the helicopter circle overhead and scream, and write the news that he is dead in the sky

Tie the black gauze to the white neck of the pigeon, and let the trafficman wear black gloves

He used to be my east, my west, my south, my north

My working day, my rest day, my noon, my midnight, my words, my songs

I thought love could be immortal, I was wrong

Don't need any more stars, take each one off

Wrap up the moon, dismantle the sun

Pour the sea, clear the forest

Because there will be nothing, no longer meaningful.

——WHAuden

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Lianhua's father returned to Japan with Lianhua's ashes and letterhead.

He came to the school to find me, and handed over all of Lianhua's unsent letters to me.The letter still remained unopened at first, and Lianhua's father's hair was half gray. I think he didn't want to read these letters, but he was afraid to read them.

After handing the letter to me he left without saying a word.When I watched his back when he walked to the school gate, I suddenly noticed that he shivered, and then he squatted down and sobbed for a while.It took a while to stand up again, and then walked out of the school with difficult steps.

Lianhua's parents divorced after all.

Her death did not restore this family, perhaps from the very beginning, this family was just doomed to be broken and dead for her.

Holding those letters, like holding treasures that I would never meet again in my lifetime, I came to the desk of the news department by myself, sat down and began to read.

I read from morning to night, without going to class, without lunch, without rest, and read all the letters without stopping.After reading those letters, it was almost the end of school, and the last bell of the day echoed throughout the campus.

I was very tired, so tired that I felt that all the strength in my body was exhausted, so after reading the letter, I lay down on the table.

It's just a short break, I thought I could close my eyes to clear my head, and when I open them again, I can stand up as usual, drink some water, eat something, and carry my schoolbag go home.

But I didn't do it.

I just lay on the table alone, closed my eyes tightly, and then my whole body began to tremble unconsciously.

Cold, cold, cold.

Tears overflowed my eyes and I started to sob.Lianhua's letter was squeezed into a ball in my hand, and the more I squeezed, the more tightly I squeezed.Even though I didn't open my eyes to read it, every word in her letter seemed to be engraved in my heart. Bit by bit, my heart was cut open bit by bit.

Blood spurted out.

The blood turned into tears, the tears kept flowing, and the blood became a river.

She is dead.

Miyake Reika died.

This bloody fact, which should have been in front of me early in the morning, hit every nerve and thought of me like destroying the entire earth.

If I hadn't read these letters, perhaps I could have continued to deceive myself that she was alive.She's just somewhere far away, out of reach, out of reach, she's not dead, she just can't come to see me.

The letter was written by Lianhua herself, no one is more familiar with her handwriting than me.There are one or two slightly yellowing marks on the letter paper. I don't know if it is the rainwater that accidentally fell, or the tears she shed.

My Lianhua does not cry easily, my Lianhua is a proud person, so I am finally convinced that it is rainwater.

I imagined Lianhua holding these letters on a light rainy day, her rain boots stepping on the water and rushing to the mailbox.However, the moment she walked to the mailbox, she hesitated again, so she stopped, wandering, wandering, to vote or not to vote?

Just like this, he kept hesitating, pacing back and forth, then inadvertently raised his head, and saw the rainy sky of Verlaine and Rimbaud.

At that moment, the world fell silent.

These letters did not travel across the sea to Japan through the hands of several postmen, but finally returned to their hometown together with her ashes after she died.

I'm sorry, Reika.I couldn't help you, I couldn't save you, I couldn't even fulfill your last wish.

They burned you to ashes and put you in that little box.You returned to your hometown, but you no longer exist.

What else can I do for you?I was so helpless, helpless, powerless.

I couldn't breathe from the deep grief, and I clutched my chest and wept bitterly.Lianhua, tell me, what else can I do for you?

You still love Jack, and you love him to the end of your life, but he doesn't know it.You want to stay by his side, you want to see him again, I can't fulfill your wish, but this is the only thing I can do for you.

I put away Lianhua's letter, cried and stumbled to Jack's classroom.

It was the time when school was over, and a large number of students came out of the classroom and rushed to the corridor. Among the crowd, I saw Marui and Jack who were preparing to go to the tennis club for training.

I was crying, and I was out of breath, and some people were looking at me curiously, and I just rushed to Jack desperately, and grabbed him without knowing it.

"She's dead!"

My grief-stricken shout made the entire boiling corridor suddenly quiet.

Jack looked at me in surprise, and Marui beside him also showed a surprised expression.

"She's dead...you know what, Lianhua is dead! She will never come back...!"

I grabbed Jack by the collar like crazy and shook him like crazy.

"Did you see these letters? Did you see them? She wrote to you...but you ignored her...even if it was alms and sympathy, why couldn't you pity her, why did you ignore her, why To hurt her, why is it so cruel...!"

The world is falling apart, everything is falling apart.Lianhua died, so I also collapsed.

Jack watched it all happen, but he did nothing.He could have replied a letter, or made a phone call, it was an easy thing for him, if he replied, if he called, even if it was just for a while, maybe the pity would be a little more possibility of survival.

But he didn't, he didn't do anything.He just watched Lianhua go to hell alone, to the end of eternal doom.

"Give her back to me, give her back to me...! Kuwahara...! Give me back Lianhua..."

I grabbed Jack's collar tightly and wept bitterly.Jack stared at me blankly, as if he had lost the ability to speak.

I kept crying, I kept questioning Jack, and I took all my grief and hatred out on him.The more I cried, the more hoarse my voice became. Gradually, I was crying until I couldn't even utter a sound. Lianhua's letters fell from my arms to the ground one by one, just like my broken heart. Similarly, you can even hear the cracking sound of "click" when it falls to the ground.

"Good news...!"

When Jingshi rushed over, I was almost so limp that I was about to fall to the ground.

"Good news! What's the matter with you?...Calm down, and speak up if you have something to say!" Jingshi hugged me from behind while trying to tear me away from Jack.

But I grabbed Jack with all my strength, and refused to let go no matter what.

"Give her back to me...give her back to me...!"

I cried out at the top of my lungs words that could never come true.Jack didn't move, didn't resist, just let me beat and punch him.

Jingshi hugged me who was out of control, and managed to move me away from Jack, but the next moment I broke free from him like crazy and rushed back.

"Akiyama! Stop it... that's enough!"

The second person who rushed over to stop me was Renji.

He and Jingshi grabbed me from left to right, pulling me back desperately.I struggled with all my strength, and kept yelling, "I hate you! I hate all of you...!"

Finally, I exhausted my physical strength and had no strength to fight back.I collapsed to the ground, Lian Er held my leg, and Jing Shi held me tightly in his arms.

"no no……!"

I couldn't help crying bitterly, crying until the sky was dark, crying so much that I thought I would die like this.

There is no reason and calm to speak of, and Lianhua's death also took away my hope of survival.She is my vision, my dream, my best friend, and my only reliable partner.

With her gone, there is hell everywhere, despair everywhere.

I can't stand up anymore, I hope I can die with Lianhua just like this.I can't forgive Jack, I can't forgive the world, I can't forgive everything that took Lianhua away.

Cry, cry, cry non-stop, cry until I almost die, cry until I almost faint.Just when I couldn't control my emotional breakdown, a man came up and slapped me heavily in the face silently.

--Snapped.

As the crisp applause fell, my crying stopped.

The person standing in front of him was Sanada.

"wake up."

His face was shrouded in the shadow of the brim of his hat, and with only three short and steady words, he strangled my throat and my body and mind.

I closed my eyes.

Everything is going away.

Falling limply into Jingshi's arms, I began to have a long, long dream.

In that dream, I, Lianhua, Jingshi, parents, grandparents, all lived happily together.There is no pain, no sorrow, no despair, it is a warm world, a world where I want to stop forever and sleep peacefully forever.

Tears soaked my face.

The author has something to say: Note 1: WH Auden (Wystan Hugh Auden, 1907-1973), British homosexual poet.This "Funeral Blues" is a poem he wrote to his dead lover, expressing the intense pain of losing a loved one.

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This is the end of the daily update~ I thank myself for your hard work XDD~

The next chapter is also the last chapter of this perspective, and will be updated the day after tomorrow~

Please girls continue to pay attention~

There will be new notices and news for the next chapter~

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