Tang's dining table

Chapter 1272 I don't get hit by the cannon, you don't get hit by the cannon, who gets hit by the cannon?

Tigers are born to eat meat.

The reason why the cannon was created is that it is born to kill people.

After the second workshop was completed after the cannon was tested, when it was demonstrated to the emperor for the first time, sixteen death row prisoners were tied at the landing point of the cannonball. These sixteen death row prisoners were not ordinary death row prisoners, but death row prisoners moved from Luoyang Lijingmen Tuishiyuan.

These death row prisoners were basically officials or nobles. When they were pulled to the second workshop, their faces were full of blue patterns, and their facial features were flattened. Even if Yun Chu saw a few familiar figures among them, when he asked, these people did not dare to recognize them and only asked for a quick death.

Luoyang Lijingmen Tuishiyuan belongs to a trial institution under the Censorate. The officials in this institution are not normal officials of the Tang Dynasty. It is said that the officials in it have complicated backgrounds. Some of them bought cakes, some were prisoners, some were slaves, and even some were foreigners.

These people were the ones who obtained their official positions by exposing and informing on others during the period when the Queen established the Tonggui in Luoyang. These guys who were in danger of losing their positions were like vicious wolves. As long as the officials and nobles in the court made a mistake, they would bite them fiercely and would not stop until they were killed.

Yun Chu did not want to make trouble, and with the active urging of Hou Sizhi, the judge who transported these people to Chang'an, these sixteen people were blown into pieces by a round of artillery.

The emperor was very happy for several days after seeing this.

It was a bit of a waste of talent to execute the death row prisoners with artillery. Yun Chu felt that at this time, from the perspective of astronomy, geography, climate, or divination, it was very suitable for artillery to be fired.

I just don't know where the shells will fall.

When Yun Chu walked out of the dark room the next day, he found that nothing happened to the Yun family. Fei Jiu was not only alive, but he also ate a pound of buns in one breath in the morning, so he breathed a sigh of relief.

Thank God, the Yun family was not the one who was hit by the artillery.

When Yun Chu was on duty, he no longer walked along Zhuque Street, but went from one market to another to enjoy the fun of ordinary people in Chang'an.

Market life was still worth seeing, whether it was an old woman who was worried about her child's poop and urination early in the morning, or a woman who was carrying a urine bucket and half-undressed and looked like she hadn't woken up yet, these were not things Yun Chu could see casually.

Seeing a small baby poop out an epic feces, Yun Chu rode away on his horse. Just now, if it weren't for the sound of the black horse's hooves that strongly encouraged the baby, the baby would not have achieved such a great feat.

This was all the credit of the court, and Yun Chu didn't dare to take it for granted.

Until half a cake flew down from a second floor and was grabbed by Yun Chu, the usually kind county master finally got angry. Looking at the half cake in his hand, he shouted, and dozens of bad people who had gathered around him early swarmed up. In an instant, the ordinary two-story building was full of big and strong bad people.

A moment later, seven or eight disheveled men, women, old and young were forced by the bad people to kneel in front of Yun Chu's horse.

Judging from the clothes of these people, they were not rich families. Among them, there was a broker wearing yin-yang shoes.

Yun Chu was very angry. How could people waste food like this?

The leader of the bad people took half a cake from Yun Chu, dipped it in a woman's clean bucket, and then distributed the half cake to the eight people to eat. From the white-bearded old man to the toddler, no one was spared.

After they finished eating, the bad people sealed their mouths with leggings and could not be loosened for less than two hours.

Yun Chu was a vigilant official who could often guess when autumn would come from a fallen leaf.

Since the scene of embarrassing food in Chang'an began to appear, it means that the waste and disregard of food by the people of Chang'an has reached a very high level.

This kind of evil trend must be stopped.

Therefore, at the morning meeting of Wannian County Yamen, Yunchu ordered the officials of Wannian County to set an example and practice a simple lifestyle, and to implement the new life movement in Chang'an, where saving is glorious and waste is shameful.

This matter was in the charge of Sihu Yang Jiong, who must carry out the new life movement to the end and implement it in all aspects of Chang'an City. The concept of saving and cherishing food must be instilled in every Chang'an citizen.

For this reason, the county lord Yunchu also wrote a poem to start the new life movement.

"In spring, one grain of millet is planted, and in autumn, ten thousand grains are harvested. There is no idle land in the world, but farmers still starve to death."

As soon as this poem came out, everyone praised Yunchu for writing poems in an unconventional way, and he wrote poems whenever he looked up and down.

The day before yesterday, public toilets were rectified, and today waste was rectified. Everyone in Wannian County Yamen and Chang'an County Yamen was busy. Officials from all over the country left the yamen and went deep into the streets and villages to vigorously publicize the two policies proposed by the county lord and require everyone in Chang'an to abide by them.

The officials even expanded the county lord's requirements to a certain extent, from clean public toilets and cherished food, to sanitation and humanistic environment, and vowed to work hard for 30 days to return a clean and civilized new Chang'an to the county lord.

Ji Wang Li Shen came to Wannian County respectfully, and after entering Yunchu's official residence, he threw his slightly fat body on the chair and knocked on the table to ask for tea.

Yunchu poured a cup of tea for Ji Wang Li Shen, and Li Shen took a sip and said, "There is no feces and urine in the pit, what's the reason?"

Yunchu took a sip of tea and said, "Hold it."

Li Shen sat up straight and said in surprise, "You mean, in the future, I will take the princess and the prince to the toilet to eat, and then go back to the dining room to shit?

The princess and I don't care where we eat, but I feel sorry for your nephew, who has been weak since childhood. Can you please be kind and allow him to eat in a normal environment? "

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Yun Chu thought for a while and said, "It's not impossible, but I'm afraid that it will be bad for the prince to eat in a normal environment."

Li Shen looked at Yun Chu for a while and said, "I will send the prince to the old immortal's courtyard when I go back and have dinner with the old immortal."

Yun Chu looked at Ji Wang Li Shen and said, "Over the years, your family's jade business has been very big. I heard that you have made a lot of money. Now there are many copper coins in the Chang'an treasury that are rusted by the sun and rain. Don't you want to contribute to your country?"

Li Shen shook his head and said, "No!"

Yun Chu refilled Ji Wang Shen's tea and said, "How stingy the prince is. "

Li Shen said: "Don't throw me into the pit. Ever since Taiping, Yong Wangxian and some unknown families began to absorb a large number of copper coins, the Ji Wang Mansion took advantage of the high price and sold all the copper coins. Now, my Ji Wang Mansion probably doesn't even have 50 strings of copper coins."

"Are you scared?" Yun Chu said sarcastically.

Li Shen said: "I visited the second workshop. Have I fallen into the pit?"

Yun Chu laughed and said: "Who made you so curious?"

Li Shen wiped the sweat from his forehead and said: "What are the consequences of being curious?"

Yun Chu smiled and said: "I have heard of a rural slang before, called-curiosity kills the cat."

Li Shen gritted his teeth and said: "No way to live, right? "

Yun Chu spread his hands and said, "If you have the guts, then rebel for me. You rebel in the morning, I will suppress the rebellion at noon, and in the afternoon, I will chop off all the heads of your family members at your doorstep. You have a large family, and I heard that you have hundreds of concubines. It must be a spectacular sight to see the heads of all the concubines rolling all over the ground."

Li Shen imitated Yun Chu and spread his hands and said, "Then what should we do?"

Yun Chu leaned lazily on the chair and said, "It depends on who gets hit. "

Just as the two were sitting in chairs and talking nonsense, a burst of rapid artillery fire suddenly came from Chang'an City. The sound of artillery was rumbling, followed by the loud noise of shells falling to the ground and exploding. Judging from the sound, it was not far from the Wannian County Government Office. The sound of shells made the window frames rustle.

Neither Yunchu nor Li Shen had the intention of getting up and hiding, letting the dust on the beams slowly fall.

The sound of artillery fire lasted for a whole incense stick of time. When the sound of artillery stopped, Yunchu moved his hand from the teacup, took a sip of the teacup, and said to Li Shen, who was pale, "From the sound, it seems not to be the direction of your home."

Li Shen didn't care that the tea was covered with dust, took a sip and said, "It's far away from my home."

Yunchu stood up and pressed Li Shen's shoulders with both hands and said, "Don't worry, the bomb will definitely explode in your home. "

Just as he finished speaking, the rumbling sound of artillery fire was heard again outside. Yun Chu looked at the officials and servants running around outside, sighed, and said to Li Shen during the interval between the bombardments: "No one who deserves to be bombarded will be left out."

Li Shen waved his hand to drive away the dust in front of him and said: "Including your family?"

Yun Chu said: "There is a 40% chance that my family will be bombarded."

Li Shen asked hurriedly: "What about my family?"

Yun Chu sighed: "70%!"

Li Shen smiled and said: "Fortunately, the princess took the prince to serve the old immortal. "

It was always dusty staying in the room, so Yunchu and Li Shen came to the courtyard of Wannian County. Li Shen wanted to play Go with Yunchu, but Yunchu refused, so the two of them played cards to compete for the top.

It was naturally extremely boring for two people to compete for the top, but the two of them sat in the courtyard, drinking tea and playing cards, having a lot of fun.

The people in the county government were originally waiting for the county lord to order the pursuit of the artillery position and capture the evil thieves in one fell swoop, but they found that the county lord not only did not give any orders, but played cards with Ji Wang.

Lu Zhaolin was pale and held a big umbrella to help the county lord shade, but his body was shaking so much that he couldn't even hold the umbrella properly.

Taking the opportunity of Ji Wangshen shuffling the cards, Lu Zhaolin said to Yunchu with his upper and lower teeth shaking: "My lord, Wu Chengsi's mansion was razed to the ground by artillery."

Yunchu said: "Wu Chengsi didn't go on duty today?"

Lu Zhaolin said with a stammer: "He changed to a day off, saying that he would hold a 100th birthday banquet for his second son. ”

Yun Chu nodded and said, “Inform him to go to work as usual tomorrow. Don’t let trivial matters at home delay his work.”

Lu Zhaolin nodded in agreement, and whispered, “The neighboring Wu Sansi residence was not spared either. The bombardment just now should be the Princess Taiping residence.”

Yun Chu did not comment. Seeing that Ji Wangshen had shuffled the cards, the two began to draw cards and studied seriously how to get away first.

After Yun Chu threw a card, he saw Lu Zhaolin still standing by, so he frowned and said, “Have you done such an important job? Did you do it as promised to keep the public toilets free of flying insects?”

Lu Zhaolin said in a crying voice, “I’d better serve the prince and the king first. "

Just as the voice fell, the sound of artillery fire rang out again. This time, the shells landed closer to the Wannian County government office. Yun Chu could even see the black shells flying in the air like meteors.

The cards in Li Shen's hand were scattered all over the ground.

Yun Chu asked Lu Zhaolin: "Are there any bad guests near our government office?"

Lu Zhaolin said: "Chang'an Post Station is nearby."

Yun Chu nodded when he heard this, helped Ji Wangshen pick up the cards from the ground and smiled: "It's your turn to play a card."

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