The Best Entertainment Era

A theater in Valencia, north of Los Angeles, near CalArts, just finished an early screening of The House of the Dead.

Logan, an investigator from the Cinema cooperative company, was waiting near the exit early.

Seeing a Latino youth approaching, Logan hurried forward and said, Hi, my name is Logan...

He briefly introduced himself and asked, Can you comment on the House of the Dead that you just watched? If you rated it according to ABCDE, which level would you rate it?

The young Latino felt as if he had just eaten shit: This is definitely the worst zombie movie ever!

Logan hadn't seen the movie, so he was a little surprised. It seemed that the movie was quite popular before it was released, and everyone was hyping up the debut of the wealthy daughter of the Hilton family.

What about scoring? he asked.

The Latino youth pouted: D! No, D—!

Is it that bad? Logan hurriedly recorded it, then gave a small gift, and said, Thank you for your rating.

Later, Logan stopped another white guy.

The beginning is full of game screens, but even though I love going to the arcade to play that game, I still have to say that this is a big bad movie. The white guy is relatively peaceful: The rating is only D.

After asking several people in a row, the highest score Logan got was D.

From point to point, years of working experience have allowed Logan to clearly judge that House of the Dead is a big bad movie!

Even those who were drawn to the film by Paris Hilton said it was utterly awful.

This film is rated E!

Hearing another fan's evaluation, Logan simply didn't know what to say. In Cinema's evaluation criteria, a movie with an E rating is the kind of movie that shouldn't be made.

But the fan's words later refreshed Logan's cognition: But this film has a bad style and bad taste. I like it!

Logan watched the fans leave happily, and almost couldn't hold back a sentence.

There are still people like this.

People who like bad movies must watch it!

The movie sucks, but I had a lot of fun watching it.

Awesome! It's amazing! This is definitely a masterpiece among bad movies!

A bad movie like House of the Dead is very rare, so let's watch it and cherish it.

These people gave House of the Dead a grade of D or less, but said it was very interesting to watch.

Logan couldn't figure out whether it was his own brain that was wrong, or the group of young people's brains were wrong.

Since it's a bad movie, why do you think it looks good?

Could it be that there has been some change in the film market that he doesn't understand?

Logan was a little confused.

At midnight, Eric returned home and immediately began to rush to draft. His good work ethic made him decide to send out film reviews as early as possible.

Be sure to spray the movie House of the Dead.

Recalling the movies he had seen, Eric seemed to feel the horror of director Uwe Ball again.

This kind of horror made Eric burst out of inspiration, and quickly wrote a film review that was magnificent, yet bitter and personal.

In addition to director Uwe Ball, he also targeted Paris Hilton, who has been popular recently, according to the agreement.

That night, Eric posted the film review on his blog, which was published on the National Herald the next day, and was quickly reposted and spread to various movie websites and forums on the Internet.

This film review also attracted great attention.

Ronan saw the comments from the newspaper that Paris Hilton handed over to him when Paris Hilton found his office before get off work on Friday.

This critic has gone too far, Paris Hilton said.

Ronan took the newspaper, flipped through it and said, What's wrong?

Seeing the name of the National Herald, Ronan understood what was going on. He was not surprised that Paris Hilton would read this newspaper. Now Paris Hilton is following the crew in the After running through the publicity, the crew of House of the Dead is full of staff from Embassy Pictures. It is too simple to want Paris Hilton to read a newspaper.

Paris Hilton gritted her teeth and said, I'm going to find someone to kill him!

Ronan reassured: Don't get angry, wait until I finish reading.

Paris Hilton sat on the sofa and sulked alone. The good mood of the new movie was completely ruined.

Ronan soon saw a review article by a full-time film critic signed Eric.

There is no best director in the world, but there are the worst directors. Uwe Ball, the director of the just-released House of the Dead, can be included in the ranks of the worst along with his films.

This film adapted from the game of the same name has an extremely boring shooting style and extremely poor quality of work! Uwe Ball's clumsy directing skills are completely challenging the bottom line of the audience's patience! Now those bad film directors finally They can take a breath. They can put their heads back, smile and sing a song in their hearts: It's okay, I didn't make a movie as bad as Dead House after all.

Equally bad is Miss Paris Hilton, who has been very popular recently. This rich daughter doesn't know what acting is at all. In the movie, she is no different from wood. The overall feeling is a fancy rich girl, posing but very boring. , she should go back to the Hilton Hotel and be her princess, there are so many ways to be famous, instead of playing this horrific character.

The movie House of the Dead is so bad that I don't even want to give it a star. The filming is really bad. The scene of killing zombies is too long, and there are all kinds of cumbersome first half of the rookie and the second half of the sharpshooter. It’s a slow-motion close-up of the characters. It’s disgusting, soft pornography, and the effort is not thankful. I feel like I’m going blind. It’s not a horror movie, or a comedy movie. This is destined to be a bad movie that is cast aside!”

At the end of the premiere, no one applauded at the scene. It was not until a few minutes later that there were sporadic applause, but the applause was more polite. This shows the audience's disgust for this film.

I'm sure that this movie will fail! If you make such a bad movie, you will be punished by the market! If the box office of Dance of Death exceeds 10 million US dollars in North America, I will drink Paris Hilton's footwash !

Seeing this, Ronan nodded secretly. Is this David Villa's idea? Should be eye-catching, right? After all, during this period of time, Paris Hilton was really on fire with the help of the embassy film industry.

I remember an NBA player whose name I don’t remember in my previous life, who said he wanted to drink Scarlett Johansson’s bath water, but it turned out to be the same as golf, and became a long-lasting meme among netizens.

Ronan put down the newspaper and glanced at Paris Hilton who was still angry. It seemed that her reaction was bigger than expected.

In this case, there should be no problem.

Seeing that Ronan had finished reading the newspaper, Paris Hilton immediately said angrily, Ronan, do you know where this newspaper is?

Ronan looked at Paris Hilton in surprise, and asked, What do you want?

I'm going to set fire! Paris Hilton said viciously, Go and burn the editorial office of this newspaper!

Ronan quickly persuaded: Paris, don't be impulsive! Calm down.

Paris Hilton, the spoiled and spoiled young lady who was praised since childhood, said, I can't swallow this breath.

Calm down first. Ronan took a glass of water for Paris Hilton, put it on the table, and said, Paris, if you want to become a star in the future, you have to get used to the cynicism of film critics. They think that only film critics It is the standard by which movies and actors are judged.

He smiled and said, But actually, no.

Paris Hilton looked at Ronan, not understanding what he meant.

Ronan added: Hollywood is actually very simple. For an actor, if the audience likes you and supports you, you are the best.

Paris Hilton asks: Do the audience like me?

Ronan returned to his desk, took out a survey report, handed it to Paris Hilton, and said at the same time: This is a piece of data from the embassy film industry. The basic sampling survey shows that last night House of the Dead was released ahead of schedule. During the screening, nearly 60% of the audience said that they chose to watch the movie House of the Dead because they were influenced by Paris Hilton.

Paris Hilton hurriedly read the report and asked, Really?

Ronan said: The audience likes you.

To be precise, the public is relatively appreciative of Paris Hilton's current personality.

Seeing the data on the report, Paris Hilton seemed to feel better, but she still said, Is this how people scold you? Don't you fight back?

Fight back! Why not fight back! Ronan said, Paris, have you ever thought about it, this is actually a good opportunity to continue to expand your popularity.

Upon hearing that she could become more famous, Paris Hilton immediately regained her spirits and asked, How could this be a good opportunity?

Ronan paced back and forth, seeming to be thinking about important issues.

Hurry up! Paris Hilton urged impatiently.

Ronan sighed secretly. This kind of pampered young lady really didn't have a good temper. He stopped and said slowly: We will counterattack strategically so that this matter can become a hot news. You publicly respond to this person named Ai. Rick's Critic's Statement.

That's it? Paris Hilton was quite disappointed: It's too...

Ronan raised his hand to interrupt her, and said, Paris, do you think this Eric is annoying? He must be punished?

Paris Hilton hardly thought about it, and said, Yeah! Ronan, what do you do?

Ronan smiled and said, Didn't he want to drink your footwashing water? We will satisfy him.

I also want him to drink my footwashing water! Paris Hilton has a bold personality, and she is not embarrassed at all: But...

Ronan said: According to incomplete statistics, the North American box office of House of the Dead including yesterday's advance screening is already close to 6 million US dollars!

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