The Daily Life of the Immortal King

Yang Huai had never expected the day the curtain fell on him to happen so soon. While he laughed crazily on the surface, inwardly he was unwilling to acknowledge it. He couldn't imagine what kind of person he had offended.

The sound of Heavenly Dao now echoed in his brain, which was spiritual pressure Spirit Heavenly Dao had put on him. The noise of an electric current was like a wave that roared endlessly inside his brain, making Yang Huai want to die.

He wanted to kill himself, and even resolutely bit off his tongue… But the strange thing was that as soon as he bit it off, it actually reattached itself…

The power of Life And Death Heavenly Dao made sure that Yang Huai had no way to free himself by committing suicide.

Instead, he experienced double the pain of killing himself.

Furthermore, his tongue was the only "muscle tissue" on him which remained untouched, since he ultimately had to use his mouth to confess and repent. On the other hand, the rest of his muscles started to atrophy bit by bit, as punishment by Strength Heavenly Dao. Unless Yang Huai realized the error of his ways, the Heavenly Dao punishment wouldn't stop.

Yang Huai looked very wretched, but what was even more tragic was that he was sent to Songhai First Prison's Mahjong Room.

...

Prior to the prison officers sending Yang Huai to the special prison cell, the Mahjong Squad was playing a new game.

The game which the Old Devil, Evil Sword God and the Master of Immortal Mansion, Cheng Yu, were playing today was: Kill the Author!

This was a card game developed using the identities of certain online authors. Each player would select a character at the beginning, and each character had a different HP. Players were dealt five cards at the beginning of the game, and drew three when it was their turn.

The Old Devil's character: Jiang Nan.

Character HP: 8

[Character Skill 1 (Chain of Blades): During play, if Jiang Nan plays three Blade cards, this is deemed as using the "Blade Knights of the Dragon Raja" skill, and every player must reveal their cards on the spot as well as discard two Blade cards. If they don't have enough Blade cards to discard, they lose one HP point. This skill can only be used once in each round.]

[Character Skill 2 (Composure): During play, if Jiang Nan gives up on playing cards, this is deemed as using the "Calmly Delay Updates Technique" skill. All Blade cards become ineffective against Jiang Nan and the other players skip their turns to play cards. When it's Jiang Nan's turn to draw cards, the other characters reveal the Blade cards they have in hand and draw the same number of cards. This skill can only be used once in each round.]

The Master of Immortal Mansion Cheng Yu's character: Heavenly Silkworm Potato

Character HP: 7

[Character Skill 1 (King of Delays in Updates): During play, Heavenly Silkworm Potato can use this skill on another character at the cost of one HP point. The targeted character can only play one card during his next two turns. This skill can only be used once in each round, and cannot be canceled out by any other card.]

[Character Skill 2 (Restricted Technique – Fire Lotus): At any time during play, Heavenly Silkworm Potato can draw two cards each from the discard pile and from the deck. If the four cards are all of different suits, the "Restricted Technique – Fire Lotus" is activated. All the other characters lose their cards and two HP points. Note: This restricted technique can only be used once.]

Evil Sword God's character: Jin <anno data-annotation-id="f04fb9ff-864c-4991-9886-8f454faa5237">Hezai</anno>

Character HP: 6

[Character Skill 1 (A Large Stick): During play, Jin Hezai can pick one male character to wrestle with on the spot. If Jin Hezai wins, this is deemed as having used the ability "A Large Stick," and the loser has to give all his cards to Jin Hezai. The skill can only be used once in each round.]

[Character Skill 2 (View Block): During play, Jin Hezai can play two action cards to use the "I Want the Sky to Never Again Cover My <anno data-annotation-id="c6c2dde7-381d-4b4d-a358-5a09430ca07c">Eyes</anno>" skill. After this skill is activated, every character will be judged by their cards in hand. Players with the hearts suit are forbidden from acting on their next turn. Players with the spades suit must discard one action card; if they don't have any action cards, they lose one HP point. The skill can only be used once in each round.]

The Old Devil played a card against Evil Sword God. "Blade!"

[Card name: Blade]

[Card type: Normal card]

[Card ability: When played, the other party loses one HP point. Can be canceled out by another Blade.]

Evil Sword God without eyeshadow: "Delay Update!"

[Card name: Delay Update]

[Card type: Action card]

[Card ability: Can defend against two Blades. If the other party plays more than two Blades, lose two HP points.]

Cheng Yu: "No Update!"

[Card name: No Update]

[Card type: Action card]

[Card ability: Renders all other action cards ineffective.]

Evil Sword God without eyeshadow -1 HP…

Evil Sword God: "Sil… Silver General Alliance!"

[Card name: Silver General Alliance]

[Card type: Action card]

[Card ability: Immediately draw three cards from the deck.]

Old Devil: "Gold General Alliance!"

[Card name: Gold General Alliance]

[Card type: Action card]

[Card ability: Immediately draw six cards from the deck. If another player used the "Silver General Alliance" on this turn, any card that was originally stolen by that player must be returned.]

The Old Devil: "Give Back <anno data-annotation-id="852c8164-de03-4833-8b25-384bba0cc969">Erii</anno>!"

[Card name: Give Back Erii]

[Card type: Action card]

[Card ability: Steal two cards from the character on the right. If the player doesn't have enough cards, he loses the equivalent number of HP points.]

Evil Sword God looked like he was near tears. "Ahhh… How – how can you bully me like this?! I quit!"

...

At that time, two prison officers of Songhai First Prison were bringing Yang Huai, restrained and laughing wildly, to the prison cell.

The Old Devil: "Hm? Why do we have a newcomer? Brother, is this person at our level?"

The prison officer laughed. "He's far from that, but Director Zhuo specially arranged this for you in case you were bored. This person is suffering some sort of aftereffect and he can't stop laughing. Director Zhuo wanted all of you to think of something."

Think of something?

The Old Devil was blank.

None of them had what it took to be a teacher.

What could they possibly come up with?

It was clear that they were being asked to use force!

"But is this alright?" Cheng Yu furrowed his brow.

He could sense that Yang Huai's realm was in fact very low; there was no way the latter would be able to endure a beating the way Evil Sword God without eyeshadow could.

"Don't worry, this Mr Yang Huai can't be beaten to death – it seems he's been cursed to never die." The prison officer laughed.

Only the leaders and division officers in the prison knew about this at first, and they weren't allowed to leak the information. However, to ensure that Yang Huai's condition could be brought under control, Odd Zhuo had specially told the prison officers escorting Yang Huai to the Mahjong Room – it was fine letting the people in there know.

"Oh." Realization dawned on the Old Devil.

Couldn't be beaten to death…

Great!

Their bones were growing numb after squatting inside day after day, and they were afraid of going overboard when they beat Evil Sword God up every day. And now someone who couldn't be beaten to death had arrived… it looked like Evil Sword God could take some days off now.

Before leaving, the prison officers gave the Old Devil a bottle of medical salve.

"This is?"

"Eyeshadow. When you beat the man up, remember to put this on Evil Sword God."

"…"

<annotations style="display: none;"><ol class="tinymce-annotation-container"><li data-annotation-id="f04fb9ff-864c-4991-9886-8f454faa5237">Author of the hugely popular online novel "The Wukong Biography," set before Wukong becomes the legendary Monkey King.</li><li data-annotation-id="c6c2dde7-381d-4b4d-a358-5a09430ca07c">A phrase Wukong says often in "Wukong Biography."</li><li data-annotation-id="852c8164-de03-4833-8b25-384bba0cc969">A character in the Dragon Raja novels by Jiang Nan.</li></ol></annotations>",