The First Chaos In History

While talking, Xiang Yu opened the door from the outside, nodded slightly when he saw sitting on the sofa, and walked upstairs.

I hurriedly introduced Hua Mulan: "This is Xiang Yu, and the fat man upstairs just now is Qin Shihuang."

Hua Mulan stood up and said in a little surprise: "Overlord of Chu?" As a military commander, Hua Mulan was more curious about Xiang Yu.

After hearing my introduction, Xiang Yu glanced at Hua Mulan again, and asked me: "A new customer?" He didn't ask much, and went straight to the stairs.

My eyes lit up, and I violently pulled Xiang Yu——

The thoughts in my mind for a moment shocked me: Hua Mulan wants to be a woman, but we can’t help with anything else. Can I introduce Xiang Yu to her as a boyfriend? Haven't I heard that the woman in love is the most beautiful, and the heroine and the Overlord of Western Chu are a perfect couple. Anyway, Yu Ji is nowhere to be seen. Hua Mulan is no worse than Zhang Bing.

Yes, I admit that my thoughts are a bit inconsistent. If Mu Guiying and Liang Hongyu come here, we won’t say anything. I’m not despicable enough to pimp for the hero’s wife. Besides, it’s a violation of the military marriage, which is illegal. ——But isn't Hua Mulan single?

I grabbed Xiang Yu and focused on introducing him: "Brother Yu, this is Hua Mulan, who has served as his father in the army, she is loyal and filial, but she is a good girl!"

Xiang Yu let out a cry, and asked Hua Mulan, "A soldier?"

I hurriedly said: "More than that, this is our Chinese female general who belongs to the first and second genus!" Princess Pingyang, the daughters of the Yang family, and sister Hongyu don't blame me for saying this. For Mulan's happiness, you should temporarily stay on the second line... …

Hua Mulan was a little uncomfortable, and said modestly: "What kind of general is this? It's only been a few years as a pioneer."

Xiang Yu couldn't help asking: "What dynasty are you, and how do you rely on women to fight?"

Hua Mulan wasn't happy now, she frowned and said, "What's wrong with the woman? I've been in hundreds of battles, and I didn't say that I was surrounded by people in an iron barrel!"

Xiang Yu's face sank. This was indeed a bit poisonous to him. It can be seen that Mulan has inherited the glorious tradition of Chinese women's quarrels with sharp teeth and sharp mouths. If it weren't for she was a female, Xiang Yu probably had done it a long time ago. . Finally he said solemnly: "Don't let me meet you on the battlefield!"

"What can you do if you meet?" Hua Mulan said unwillingly; "The cavalry of Rouran (the enemy of Hua MM) is only stronger than Liu Bang's Han army."

The meaning is obvious. That is to say, my enemy is much stronger than yours, but I won and you lost. From this it is calculated: I am much stronger than you.

Xiang Yu shook his hand and snorted: "It's a pointless fight, your mouth is kung fu!" Saying that a good man is about to walk away if he doesn't fight with a woman, Hua Mulan contemptuously said: "Try not to accept it, you are not even the art of war. Can't deduction, right?"

Xiang Yu said "Huh" and had to look at the woman in front of him again. Reached out at me: "Xiaoqiang—"

The two of them caught the fire as soon as they met each other. I only reacted now. Xiang Yu's shout frightened me: "What are you doing, aren't you going to do something with a girl?"

Xiang Yu glared at me and said, "Give me pen and paper."

My soul is flying out of the sky: "You are not going to stand up for life and death, right?"

Xiang Yu impatiently picked up a large piece of white paper and two pens from my desk and walked to Mulan. Handed her one, and immediately drew it on the paper. After a while, mountains, rivers, paths and plains appeared on the paper. Xiang Yu drew a circle in the paper and said to Hua Mulan, "You and I each have 5,000 infantrymen. , Grab this."

Hua Mulan took the pen and said: "Okay!" Then she curiously played with the gel pen in her hand.

I hurriedly went over and watched, and saw that the two of them lined up from one side, and in a short while, the paper was filled with dots representing soldiers—it turns out that there was a game called "Age of Empires" in ancient times.

Xiang Yu drew a circle by a river, and said: "I use this as a supply point. I launch a rapid march to the destination..."

Hua Mulan bluntly circled the hills where he must walk: "I am closer to this place than you, and I am divided into four groups to ambush you like this. Have you ever seen you?"

Xiang Yu smiled contemptuously: "The mere five thousand people have to be divided into four groups. Will you lead soldiers?" However, as Hua Mulan explained, Xiang Yu's expression gradually became serious, and he could see that he had already eaten up his conspiracy. Big loss.

Hua Mulan circled Xiang Yu's soldiers. Then he led an arrow through the mountain and said, "After you get out of this mountain, you have at most 500 left. Even if you give you the destination, can you hold it?"

Xiang Yu was stunned, and finally had to say: "Even if I have only 500 left, I still have a chance to win..." Then he drew a pen on the paper, "As long as I take the lead in rushing back and forth, I can definitely drive you away."

At this time, everyone could see that Xiang Yu was starting to entangle him. You said that he was hitting the stars and suddenly ran out of a hero who was promoted to the rank of monster. Isn't this shameless?

Hua Mulan threw the pen to show her disdain to play with Xiang Yu.

Xiang Yu became angry and said, "Fighting is not just talking about soldiers. Xiang is the enemy of ten thousand people. Are you afraid of your mere five thousand foot soldiers?"

In fact, if you really want to fight, I fully believe that Xiang Yu leads 500 people who are enough to defeat the general generals. Wouldn't the army be wiped out?

There are two main reasons for Xiang Yu’s bad taste. First, Hua Mulan’s vanguard has only 3,000 people. What he is most adept at is the careful calculation of local battles. The battles under the command of Xiang Yu range from tens of thousands to hundreds of thousands. Naturally, there is no shortage of soldiers who can use soldiers. He doesn’t care about the details. Secondly, the two have a history of hundreds of years. During this period, the strategy of war has slipped a lot. Why can Waldner not be able to fight Wang Liqin? It's not that he is old, because he can't keep up with the pace of the times. Why did the Qing Dynasty decline? That's because they are standing still. Why can't Chinese football work-that's because it has not been.

These two people stared at me with big eyes. You don’t like me. I don’t think you’re awkward. I don’t understand. This is how I planned to meet each other properly. In the final analysis, Xiang Yu can’t speak. It seems he This kind of male chauvinism has to be served by a woman with a humanoid type like Yu Ji. Mulan, who has a strong sense of honor and mission, is still looking for a man like Zhongmen Zhonglie, but how can I find Man Zhonglie for her?

Xiang Yu waved his hand and walked away. When he reached the top of the stairs, he couldn't help but turn around and said, "Why don't I take the mountain road?"

Hua Mulan said: "Then you must arrive at your destination later than me. Five thousand to five thousand. I am in the city and you are under the city. Do you know the consequences?"

—

Xiang Yu snorted and disappeared as if. I only discovered today that Brother Yu also has a childish side.

After running Xiang Yu away, Hua Mulan sat cross-legged on the sofa again. Smiled helplessly at me.

I said, "Sister, let me show you what you want." I have to teach her the knowledge of daily life first, and can't let Baozi see my cousin who can't even read the watch or even open the door. I started with the quartz clock on the wall and kept introducing her to the various electrical appliances upstairs.

Qin Shihuang was playing the game and asked without looking back, "Is it a newcomer?"

I hurriedly introduced Hua Mulan: "This is Qin Shihuang. From now on, I can call it Brother Ying."

Hua Mulan smiled at Qin Shihuang. Then he scratched his head and said, "Qin Shihuang... the one was Xiang Yu just now, that's not it..."

I hurriedly made a silent gesture to her, and then quietly told her: "Jing Ke is also downstairs."

Hua Mulan paused and said, "You are too lively, right?"

I nodded: "It's okay. Liu Bang is even more prosperous when he comes back tonight."

Hua Mulan laughed blankly: "Who else are you?"

I said: "Su Wu showed me the gate, stealing protection fees in the suburbs, you don't know the rest, and I will introduce it to you later when I have a chance."

I briefly told Qin Shihuang about Mulandi's deeds. After hearing this, the fat man handed the first machine to Hua Mulan: "Good girl, you play this." This was an expression of the emperor's respect for this loyal and brave woman. .

With sweat on my forehead, I pulled Hua Mulan and walked out: "Brother Ying, please play first, try to close your eyes and get Super Mario through the level."

I told Hua Mulan: "The things in the house are basically like this, and they are no different from yours. It's just a bit more convenient, how to live and how to live."

Hua Mulan said: "It's full of freshness, so it's not convenient-we only need one person to take a bath."

When it's over, it seems that modernization leaves only a shadow on Mulan, and there will be no idlers around her in the future, I am afraid she will not even dare to take a bath.

I said to Xiang Yu, who was smoking in the living room, "Brother Yu, you drive in the car and take Sister Mulan out for a walk."

Xiang Yu pinched the cigarette. Picking up the car key and rushing to Mulan, "Go."

Hua Mulan seemed unwilling to be with Xiang Yu, and said, "Just ride a horse, what kind of car do you take?"

Xiang Yu stood at the top of the stairs and said, "Don't talk nonsense, can you get 100 on horseback?"

Hua Mulan followed him and walked out: "What is Mai..."

I didn't realize it until they walked out the gate: Xiang Yu dared to run away while driving the scrapped golden cup! Damn, there is 100 on the Jinbei Speedometer? The pointer is drawn to the leg, right-

I lay on the glass and yelled at Xiang Yu: "Brother Yu, slow down!" Before the words fell, Xiang Yu and Hua Mulan had run away in black smoke.

I have to say that no matter how Xiang Yu is evaluated in history, Brother Yu is a pure man after all, and never takes his life seriously is his biggest characteristic. His biggest shortcoming is that he doesn't take other people's lives seriously.

I sat downstairs and took a nap. When I opened my eyes, it was already a bit dark. Buns came in with a basket, while turning around and said: "Kezi, wash and eat..." I saw Jing Ke holding a bite behind her. A bite of persimmon was peering around.

Bao Zi entered the door and asked me: "I heard Ke Zi said that a woman came home this afternoon?"

I lied according to the arrangement and said: "My cousin, specially came to our wedding."

"What about people?"

"Go out with Brother Yu."

"I never heard that you have so many sisters and sisters?"

I said, "Wait, who else will come on the day of the work. Our Xiao family is also from a well-known clan."

Baozi contemptuously said: "Didn't you tell me that your grandpa's cousin had accounted for the pseudo security chief?" She asked me, "It should be counted as a person, do you think 10 tables are enough that day?"

I shook my head: "Enough."

A joke, 10 tables, I will definitely come back in 300 days, plus Liangshan heroes, how many tables are there?

After Baozi went upstairs, there was not much time for the car stalling at the door, and then there was a quarrel, Xiang Yu's voice: "...Then the two thousand cavalry on my right flank watched you hit me?" Hua Mulan said, "Yours. The two thousand cavalrymen had long since been touched by me with a dive!"

Xiang Yu's dissatisfied voice: "Come and tell me how can you eat my cavalry with less than three thousand heavy infantry?"

Hua Mulan carried the door on her shoulder and gestured on the palm of her hand: "Didn't I tell you. I will attack your cavalry camp before the attack. Your cavalry can't sleep right away, right?"

...

It seems that the two of them didn't do anything along the way. They changed the map and turned on fire again. I was puzzled. They were both men who have fought for half their lives. Haven't they done enough?

The two came in noisily, Xiang Yu obviously suffered another loss in the art of war, so he repeated the old tricks. The perverted hero reappears in the arena, standing out with one enemy and ten thousand...

Hua Mulan said in a lesson of instruction: "You are always like this. Fighting is not a matter of one person or two people, you have to be careful..."

I interfaced: "Teamwork."

Hua Mulan clapped her hands: "Yes, it's teamwork, you always emphasize..."

I reconnected: "Personal heroism."

Hua Mulan: "Well, personal heroism is not enough!"

Xiang Yu waved his hand and said: "Then you always emphasize conspiracy and tricks? Ten people are absolutely|||one person? Which of my Xiangmou subordinates is not one of the elite, even if my two thousand cavalry are bare buttocks, they still oppose Eat your three thousand infantry."

Hua Mulan grunted and said to me: "Look at this man who is unreasonable? It's good to talk about the art of war. Besides, my person is not paperless. Why can your Chu army be used as two of me? ?"

I heard my head fighting like a fight, and waved my hands again and again and said, "Stop arguing, none of you are my opponents in the war. I only need to send 100 fireworks troops to feint in the front, and then send a special team of 2 people. When the troops drop by your headquarters, everything will be fine for a beheading operation."

Hua Mulan was at a loss, but Xiang Yu was taken aback, and then said: "Our

What are the salute troops and airborne troops? "

I spread my hands and said, "Isn't this over? So the war is impossible to say. How did people fight the ground in the Guandu War, how to fight the ground in the War of Water, how to fight the war of Liberation with millet and rifle? ."

At this moment, Baozi heard someone talking and poked his head out of the stairs to ask: "Cousin is back?"

I waved to her: "Come and I will introduce you."

I pulled Baozi in front of Hua Mulan and said, "Cousin. This is our daughter-in-law, Baozi."

Hua Mulan held the Baozi in her arms and patted her on the shoulder with her right hand. I think this might be their past military salute.

Baozi smiled and said, "I didn't know my cousin was coming, and didn't prepare anything. What would you like to eat tonight?"

Hua Mulan said: "Whatever. Just warm things up. After eating ice bumps for many years, it's just that the stomach is a little bad."

"Is it okay to eat fried noodles?"

Hua Mulan said: "Okay!"

Baozi rubbed his shoulders and whispered to me: "Cousin is really cool." Then he went upstairs.

It’s really cool. Hua Mulan wore a man’s clothes and was vigorous and resolute. I guess Baozi might see Mulan wearing nothing in it when he hugged...

I told Hua Mulan, "Sister, do you have confidence in yourself after seeing my wife?"

Hua Mulan glanced at me and said: "What do you know, this is a woman, I like this girl!"

I thought viciously, maybe ugly people would be more popular among the same sex. So does my popularity have something to do with my appearance? Just forget Jin Shaoyan, Hua Rong, and Song Qingai with me—then why are Li Kui and Yang Zhi also so iron with me?

I looked at Hua Mulan and said regretfully: "It's a pity that the teacher is not there, or let her lead you to buy some clothes first."

"Who is the teacher?"

I paused and said vaguely: "Emperor's concubine."

Hua Mulan said, "Oh, did your emperor choose his concubine again? I saw it when I went out just now."

I was stunned: "What?"

Xiang Yu said on the side: "The model team is performing at the open-air exhibition." I was surprised.

After the meal was served, Hua Mulan mixed some sauce on the noodles, rolled the noodles on chopsticks, and ate it like a chicken leg. I just mixed with cucumber shreds and she had finished eating. We were so surprised that we were stunned and saw the table full of people. Looking at her, Hua Mulan was a little embarrassed to say: "I'm used to it. The military order doesn't wait for anyone. If I have something to eat, I will quickly take a bite and practice it."

Baozi asked: "Cousin joined the army?" Hua Mulan nodded.

Baozi was full of small stars: "I'll just say you have a special temperament, how did you get in?" Baozi told me more than once that her biggest dream before the age of 20 was that there was already a shortage of service places at that time, and there was no way out. Can't get in at all, Baozi persists, and ran away from home many times, but to no avail...

Hua Mulan said casually: "I went because of my father."

"Yeah, which military district chief is your uncle?" Baozi was ambiguous, and could not help but involuntarily brought out a flattering intention. It seemed that he was unwilling to kill our people's army. She even glared at me, probably It's because I have such relatives why I didn't tell her earlier.

I immediately stared back: "There are disciplined in the army, keep it secret!"

Bao Zi grabbed Hua Mulan's hand and said, "Is my cousin a telephone agent or a literary soldier?"

Hua Mulan hadn't heard of this before, scratching her head and said: "I'm a pioneer."

This time it was Baozi's turn to wonder: "Pioneer? What rank?"

I hurriedly said: "Probably equivalent to the colonel."

Baozi said dubiously: "This is the first time I have seen the 29-year-old female team leader." It is rare and strange. There are several female group army commanders in Chinese history, and there is still one female president. She was finally impeached by the Xue family.

Hua Mulan saw Baozi's fist and slapped her hand and said, "If I can go back, I will take you with me, but you have to be able to endure hardship."

The bun straightened up his chest immediately: "Of course I can endure hardship. Do you know why I did the door welcoming?"

I said, "Because you can't do anything else--"

Baozi glared at me: "Who said the land? Back then, I didn't even go to several state-owned enterprises to hire me."

This is true. One of them is a carton factory that lacks a box. The basic work is 400, and then I send the package. I will help her figure it out. If you can get an extra 500,000 boxes a month, you can get a bonus of 200 yuan; The other one is better, and it is still an agency. A certain county cultural bureau lacks a carport...

Baozi continued: "Every time I stand at the door, I think of myself as a guard~www.wuxiaspot.com~ stand up to every guard! This way, I won't be tired at all."

I said, "Come on, have you ever seen a guard wearing a cheongsam?" I guess it's just like Baozi that I don't like red outfits and armed, because red outfits can't pretend to be anything.

Xiang Yu sighed: "It's a pity that we can't go back, otherwise I have to give Baozi a general title, I believe she will be a good soldier."

Qin Shihuang looked at the steamed bun and hesitated for a while before he said, "Xiao Hungry (then I) let you be Hungry Sima." Sima, Minister of National Defense?

I looked at them contemptuously, and they will be yelling, a bunch of them, I am the king and the king, there are more virtual titles than those entrepreneurs, but the rights are not as good as the chairman of the carton factory labor union, bah!

I put my arms around the shoulders of the buns and said, "Let's go, let's not go, it's better for soldiers in peaceful times."

Baozi pulled me away, and said excitedly: "What's the point of that? I like to wear an armed belt and carry a shell gun across the body..."

"Do you not stick the plaster on the forehead? Do you think you belonged to the military police brigade?" I was immediately beaten by the buns, and I rubbed my body and thought: "Just wait, there is no character after Xinhai in this book... "