Three Philosophical Questions for Travelers

The lunatic and the hag looked at each other and said, "We don't have cat problems like this, Quack!"

I can't see it!Gerrit's expression became as uncomfortable as constipation.

"Then please give me another chance, lunatic and hag. I have to meet Dadaras, I have something very important to ask her."

The lunatic and the hag looked at each other again, and said, "Well then, the lunatic and the hag have three questions. If you can answer them, we will take you to the secret realm of Dadaras."

finally come!Geralte is ready.She said to herself in her heart: Come on!No matter how cat-sick the question is, I can answer it!The forest witch has her own tricks!

The crazy woman scribbled in the air with her cat's paws, as if she were knitting a sweater.Then the vines at Geralte's feet began to squirm, quickly weaving into a wicker chair and a table. "Please sit down." The mad woman said to her.

oh?That's pretty serious, Gerrit thought to herself, but the test questions must be very catty, it's okay, I'm good at answering such questions.

At this time, the crazy woman said:

"The first question, the new poem of the Druid school, the last sentence of Chapter 2 in the article "Wild Apes on Mountains": "Apes have no virtue, and man apes do evil; the virtue of ethics is invisible?" What does this sentence mean? How do you understand it in the full text? As a liberal witch, how do you apply this sentence to your practice? Please answer."

"Ah?" Zhe Li was stunned, "What are you talking about? Repeat it again?"

So the crazy woman said it again, and then said: "You have 10 minutes to think about this question."

Why is this test suddenly so serious?Shouldn't you be asking about "catnip and cat attraction" or "the third theorem of dried fish" or something?

New poetry of the druid school?Mountain wild ape?Wild ape?Is this the new textbook for liberals?I didn't learn this thing at all at that time!Zhe Lite looked at Du Ni, and the Seven Colored Witch smiled wryly at her, expressing that she couldn't help.

Gerrit snapped her fingers and said, "If given a choice, I would choose C."

"Wrong, go to the next question." The hag said.

This is also a matter of course, Geralte sat in a different position, waiting for the next question.

The next question was posed by the hag, and the black cat said:

"Second question, the witch of truth, Maria Mafa Massant, once said: 'The essence of liberal witchcraft is the fusion and unity of man and nature.' Then I would like to ask: after the fusion and unity, it should be controlled by humans Nature, or should nature control people? Please explain the meaning of your choice. Then, around this proposition, write an argumentative essay of about [-] words. You have one hour to answer the question."

Gelie said blankly: "I choose B."

The lunatic said: "Wrong, then the third question—"

Gerrit slapped the table: "I'll fucking choose A! It should be right this time!"

The lunatic and the hag said together: "You, you failed. Quack!"

Gerrit turned the table over without saying a word, "I think you are trying to make things difficult!" She questioned the two cats, "When did the liberals learn this kind of stuff? You let Dadaras come out to see me , I will also test her! I want to ask her why the size of ducks and chickens is so big and that of pigeons! If she can't answer, she is a stick!"

The lunatic and the hag laughed, and then the hag said, "Okay, ok! Master Gerrit, I'll give you another chance—the fourth question! It's the last question that no one can answer! The madman The ultimate test with the hag!"

"What?" Gerrit frowned.

The two cats pointed at her and said together: "You, tell me a nasty joke!"

"what?"

"Tell a dirty joke, right now, immediately! A liberal witch must be able to tell a dirty joke!"

Author's message:

ps: IQ -4

The bounty continues——

Song of the Liberals, [-]

Song of the Liberals, [-]

Nasty jokes, this is interesting, Gerrit searched for a joke in her mind, and then began to preach: "In a small town in the south, there is a tavern."

The lunatic and the hag sat on the ground, listening very carefully.Looking at their serious faces, Gerette realized that these guys would not be easy to laugh at.

"One day, a man named Old Jack went to a tavern to drink. Jack was a skinny old man who liked nothing but drinking. When he was drinking that day, he saw a basket on the table in the tavern. Inside the basket was There were a lot of gold coins, and there was a straw stuck in the coin. He was very puzzled, and asked the owner of the tavern, "Hey, boss, what is this for?""

Zhe Lite looked at the expressions of those people, and then imitated the tone of a man and said: "The boss said: 'This is a bet. You put a gold coin here, it is considered a bet. After that, if you can complete three tasks , you can take this basket of gold coins away, if not, then this gold coin will stay.'”

"Old Jack asked him, 'What are those three missions?' The boss replied—" Gerrit changed her voice, "'Hey! First, you're going to beat my bodyguard.'"

"Old Jack took a look at the bodyguard. It was a very strong man with bulging muscles and a fierce look. So Jack said: 'Ha, I can't beat him.'"

"The boss continued: 'Your second task is to go to my backyard and pull out the bad teeth of a vicious dog.' The boss pointed to the backyard, where there was a ferocious dog barking. Jack thought: If Pull its teeth, and my hand will have to be bitten off."

"'One last mission, you're going upstairs and satisfying a horny widow. That bitch is not an easy character!' After saying that, the boss asks him, 'Well, do you want to join the game?'"

"Jack thought to himself, this is a tavern trick, and I can't be fooled. However, after a few drinks, he felt that he was not himself-I was the king of the world! Thinking like this, he put a Throw a gold coin in and say, 'I'm here to challenge!'”

"The people in the tavern cheered, and followed Jack to complete the first task. He came to the bodyguard, slapped the bodyguard with a slap, and then rushed forward and beat the bodyguard violently. The bodyguard But I have never seen such a lunatic, and I immediately gave up."

"The people cheered, and old Jack got more excited, so he ran to the backyard alone to find the vicious dog. The people waited outside, and after a while they heard the dog screaming, and a terrible sound came from the yard. Sound. About ten minutes later, old Jack came back with injuries all over his body. People said he was a hero."

"At this time the boss asked him: 'Where's the dog's bad teeth? Show me.'"

"'Teeth? What dog's bad teeth?' He pushed the boss away and yelled at the others, 'Now tell me! Where's the bitch with the bad teeth?'"

The joke was over, but everyone didn't laugh.This is the most embarrassing thing, Gerrit thought to herself: do they find it not funny, or do they not understand?

Then the hag said to her, "A man lives a dog, doesn't he?"

It is even more embarrassing when others point out the joke with a serious face.Geralte could only say, "Yes."

"The sun dog is not ridiculous." The lunatic said very seriously, "This joke may be able to amuse ordinary people, but the forest witch is well-informed, and the sun dog is not unusual."

Bad, thought Gerrit, I forgot these guys are out of their minds!Things like Japanese dogs are part of their daily life, and it is no longer enough to make them happy!

Thinking about it this way, if this kind of thing can't make them laugh, what else can make them laugh?

"Gerette, you are not qualified!" said the hag. "A witch who can't tell jokes is not a good witch. You are not qualified to meet Dadaras."

"Please! Please give me another chance, I must meet Darthas."

The hag and madwoman looked at each other and asked her, "Then why do you want to see Darth?"

Gelette said truthfully: "I have two requests. First, I need her to divination for me. I want to know if a certain person is still alive, and where is this person now?"

The hag asked her: "Who is this person? Is it your concubine?"

Gelieta said: "He is a good friend of mine. He is a man of integrity and noble character. He is a unparalleled saint. If he lives, many people in the world will benefit."

The crazy woman asked again: "Then what is your second purpose?"

Gerrit replied: "I want to worship her as a teacher and learn the profound and grand law of the liberal school."

The lunatic and the hag groaned for a while, and then the hag said: "Well, for the sake of your piousness, I will give you one more chance—tell another joke!"

Gerrita asked, "Why do you have to tell jokes?" The cats were so hard to catch, I'm afraid I couldn't make them laugh.

The lunatic said: "Quack quack quack! Let me ask you, what are the three compulsory courses for liberal witches?"

"Which three?" Gerald really hadn't learned it before.

The lunatic raised a cat nail: "Number one! Endure loneliness!"

The hag raised another cat nail: "Second! Amuse yourself!"

Finally, they said in unison: "Third, you can tell dirty jokes!"

Gelette said, "What kind of compulsory course is this for the mentally retarded? I didn't have these when I was in primary school."

Du Ni said behind her: "Master Gerrit, these are the three principles established by the witch of truth, Maria Mafa Macent. Liberal witches, the most important thing is to be happy." She spread her hands, " People live to be happy, if you are not happy, then everything is wrong.”

The hag said: "That's right! Gerrit, if you can't understand 'happiness', it proves that you can't be a real liberal witch."

I was quite happy before I met you, Gerrit thought to herself.

"Okay then, I'll tell you two more?" she asked.

"All ears," said the two cats.

So Geralte told two more nasty jokes, the first was about the queen having an affair with the eunuch, and the second was a silly homophonic joke, which she thought she had told well enough, but the two cats remained indifferent.

"You have failed, Gerrita," said the hag to her. "You have not understood the true meaning of happiness, you have not understood the words of Maria Mafa Massente."

Gerrit couldn't bear it anymore, she shouted loudly: "The words of the Witch of Truth are simply wrong! You are all wrong!"

Song of the Liberals, VI

Song of the Liberals, VI

This is a shocking speech, even a liberal witch who is full of judgment spirit will not easily oppose the words of the Grandmaster.Maria Mafa Macent is known as the Witch of Truth. Liberal witches treat her words like gods, and few people dare to question what she said.Witches often say: Everything the truth witch says is the truth, if you don't understand, it's just that you are not wise enough.

But Gelie didn't care about this, even in the liberal school, she was a monk of the wild way.She only learned from an unknown witch for three days, and then learned the rest of the witchcraft by herself.During this period, she had almost no contact with liberal witches, nor did she learn orthodox liberal spells—it was precisely because of this that she wanted to come here to learn from them.

Zerette asked: "Maria said that liberal witches must have three homework, one of which is to tell dirty jokes?"

The lunatic replied: "Yes, what's the matter?"

"Then let me ask you, why are you telling nasty jokes?"

The lunatic gritted her teeth and said, "Of course it's to feel happy!"

Geralte said: "Don't liberal witches have no fun if they don't tell dirty jokes?"

The lunatic and the hag looked at each other and said, "Of course not! We still have the ability to entertain ourselves."

Gerrit clapped her hands and said, "That's right! Think about it, the emotions of a liberal witch should also be free. You can laugh when you want to, and cry when you want to! How can happiness depend on jokes? I think the happiness brought by dirty jokes is false happiness."

This remark caused the witches to think deeply, and the witch said: "You are right." The madwoman said: "Then what do you think is real happiness?"

Zerette said: "A true liberal witch should be able to be happy without relying on external objects!"

The lunatic asked her, "How do you say that?"

Gellette puffed up her chest and said, "Liberal witches can laugh when they want! They are not dominated by the outside world. You can laugh when there is a joke, but you can also laugh when there is no joke! This is freedom. Pai, are you right?"

"That's the truth." The mad woman said.

"I agree too," said the hag.

Only Du Ni didn't speak, she was watching with cold eyes.There was a moment of silence, and then Gerrita asked, "Shall we try?"

The hag asked her, "Try what?"

Geralte replied, "Try subjective pleasure."

Everyone looked at each other, and the crazy woman asked her, "How do I try this?"

"That's right, subjectively becoming happier." Geralte said.

There was a moment of tranquility in the air, and after about five seconds——

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack!"

"Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow—!"

No reason, no reason, liberal wood witches laughing in the woods!The whole forest was terrified, the birds flew away, the worms burrowed into the soil, and the bears hid in caves.

Am I infected by cat disease?Gelie laughed and thought to herself, I was infected by this group of retarded people, what's so ridiculous about it?

But she just found it funny and couldn't stop.

At this time, the hag shouted: "There are cat diseases, cats have cat diseases! They all have cat diseases!" Then the mad woman burst into laughter, rolling on the ground clutching her stomach.

They themselves didn't know what was going on, but they were very happy anyway, laughing until they got sick and couldn't get up.And every time the laughter stopped, another person would shout: "There is a cat disease! There is a cat disease!" Then others would burst into laughter again, and then others would laugh along with them.After a dozen back and forth like this, the witches couldn't laugh anymore. One person and two cats lay on the ground moaning, and some people would let out a "giggle" laugh from time to time.

"The liberal... witchcraft... is too powerful." Geralte gasped.

The lunatic and the hag collapsed on the ground, sticking out their tongues, like two dead dogs.

At this time, Gerrit suddenly noticed that Du Ni was looking at her without saying a word, so she asked Du Ni, "Why don't you laugh, Du Ni?"

"Master Gerrita." Du Ni bowed, "I have seven personalities in my body, but I am the only one who is not insane—don't force others to make things difficult for me."

The air was quiet again.

Thus, Gerrit passed the test successfully.That night, the lunatic and the hag entertained her to spend the night in Dadaras' mansion.The three-star witch Dadaras lives in a cave on the top of the mountain.But this is not unusual for liberal witches, because witches can live wherever they want,

The entrance of this cave is very small, but the inside is very deep and long enough to accommodate a village.The hag and Zhe Lite said: "This is the fortress that Dadaras dug to isolate it from outside interference. It is said that she dug it for 77 years."

"If she just dug it by herself, it would take about 700 years." Gelie looked at this place and said.

"I don't know what secret method she has, but Dadaras did it all by herself. Because Dadaras never enslaved anyone or any animal." The hag said as she led the way, and there were stairs under their feet , together it is difficult to count.Gerette couldn't believe that this was done by herself.