I, Zhu Youjian: the first prodigal son of the Ming Dynasty

Chapter 195

"So, that dead eunuch asked you for a favor?" Zhu Youjian asked helplessly, "Then did you give him anything?"

Li Zicheng's old face darkened, and he said angrily, "No."

"We are a rough man and a poor man, apart from some food stored at home, and the chickens, ducks, fish and geese shared by the villagers, how can we have spare money for others?

Moreover, even if there is spare money, we can't give it to him! "

Li Zicheng looked aggrieved.

"Oh, why can't you give it to him?" Zhu Youjian, the idiot emperor, said with a smile: "He is someone close to me, so aren't you afraid that he will speak ill of you in my ears and kill you?"

Li Zicheng held his neck, held his breath, and said, "Hmph, even if he wants to kill our old Li, we still have to see who the current Long Live Lord is?

If Lord Long Live is a fool, he will naturally beg our old Li to die.

But Long Live Lord, you are the greatest Ming emperor and holy emperor in our Ming Dynasty, you are a good emperor, how could you listen to the eunuch's one-sided words, thus harming your inner secret agent Linglingba..."

After speaking, Li Zicheng carefully peeked at the emperor's face.

He wanted to slap himself twice.

Ouchi secret agent [-], how can this identity be revealed in the presence of others?I'm just dizzy...

The idiot emperor didn't take it seriously, he laughed and said: "Hahaha, you, Li Ziguo, are indeed a hero, and you are worthy of being our secret agent zero zero eight!

Those eunuchs are used to eating and receiving cards on weekdays, and they don't have to ask for them when they are with important officials in the court, they will happily give away some coins, antiques, calligraphy and paintings and so on.

These, I understand in my heart.

But Li Zicheng, you have to know that when the water is clear, there will be no fish. Governing a country is not what you ordinary people imagine, it must be so that there is no room for a grain of sand.

I often still think that being an emperor is sometimes similar to raising fish to grow food. You can’t just clean up the entire fish pond or the entire field because the water is too muddy or there are too many weeds? "

Li Zicheng held his breath, and suddenly couldn't bear it anymore.

No wonder the dead eunuch below was so arrogant, and he was unscrupulous when he asked for benefits.

Feelings are your emperor's inaction?

The upper beam is not straight and the lower beam is crooked. Could it be that our Ming dynasty is about to become a great black dynasty?

No, it's hard to meet Long Live Lord once, how can he, the 'big inner secret agent [-]', not say anything!

"Long live, my minister... Caomin has a few words in his heart, don't know if he should say it or not?"

"Since it's from your heart, feel free to say it. I give you the right to speak out."

"Then, did I just say it?"

"Well, go on, I'm listening."

To be honest, facing such a simple, honest and upright character like Li Zicheng, the idiot emperor was quite happy in his heart.

Work hard, you old boy can rebel if you want.

Anyway, even I rebelled, afraid of a hammer...

"Long live, the old man said that the water is clear and there will be no fish. The grass people think this is very reasonable, but it is not right."

Li Zicheng's face was dark, and he said seriously: "Long live, you have never raised fish, but our old Li is an expert in fish farming. For fish farming, the water needs to be fertile and the grass needs to be abundant, but the variety of fish is different. but not too complicated;
Especially that kind of bad fish, once found, they must be completely salvaged and killed one by one!

why?

We raise fish to eat fish meat and drink fish soup, not to let those bad fish eat fish meat and drink fish soup..."

Li Zicheng's words were a bit rough, but his reasoning was so-so, which not only made Zhu Youjian laugh out loud.

Even Zheng Zhilong, Wang Chengen and others who accompanied him around nodded in agreement, thinking that this black-faced man was straightforward, honest and honest, much more pleasing to the eye than some ministers in the court.

"Okay, okay, Li Zicheng, your reasoning is much more transparent than mine," Zhu Youjian said with a smile, "Then tell me, how should we deal with this situation?
Don't worry, as long as what you say is right, I will agree to everything. "

"Caomin don't dare to say..." Li Zicheng grinned and laughed a few times: "They are all serving the Lord Long Live. Even if the grassroots have the guts, they don't dare to speak nonsense."

Zhu Youjian stretched out a finger, pointed at Li Zicheng's nose and scolded with a smile: "You Li Zicheng, you seem to be honest and honest, but in fact you are even worse than me!
Hahaha, I like you.

Wang Chengen? "

The idiot emperor suddenly turned his face, and looked at the eunuch Wang Chengen with a gloomy expression: "Whose godson is that little Liu Zi?
Is it Wei Zhongxian's, or your Wang Chengen's? "

Wang Chengen knelt down with a 'thump'.

"Long live God, calm down, that damned servant is my godson..."

Zhu Youjian looked at Wang Chengen, picked up a bowl of tea, and drank it slowly without making a sound.

There seemed to be a murderous intent looming on the young and handsome face.

This kind of dog slave is simply ashamed to live in this world!

Zhu Youjian has always turned a blind eye to playing in the capital. Anyway, everyone is playing like this. Although it sounds appalling, there are eunuchs asking for bribes of several 10 every now and then. Two denarii...

After all, it was just a house-playing game.

The transfer of money from the hands of one bad official to another bad eunuch will not hurt the foundation of the Ming Dynasty.

However, once they leave the capital, they still have to play this trick.

That is the way to die!

The common people are the foundation and the most fundamental pillar of a dynasty.

Once even the common people start to develop this kind of custom, thinking that they have to give gifts when they meet important people, and they need to burn incense and kowtow to do trivial things, then it is time for the Ming Dynasty to come to an end...

"Long live God forgives the sin, this servant will punish him severely!"

Wang Chengen spent a long time by the idiot emperor's side, and his mastery of Zhu Youjian's joys, anger, sorrows and joys can be said to be second only to the great eunuch Wei Zhongxian.

At this moment, the emperor's expression...

It was clearly a murderous intent.

"Oh? How do you punish? Thirty court rods? One month's salary?"

Zhu Youjian said coldly: "If you think it's so feasible, then go for it."

While talking, the idiot emperor stood up, picked up the teapot, filled himself with tea, and poured tea for Zheng Zhilong and others.

For a while, there was a 'speech' in the hall.

Everyone fell to their knees and shouted in unison: "Long live Lord calm down, it is important that Long live Lord take care of the dragon's body..."

Everyone could see that Zhu Youjian was really angry this time.

The emperor brought tea and water to the ministers...

I really dare not think carefully about the things here!
Especially those accompanying eunuchs headed by Wang Chengen were even more terrified, their faces were so frightened that their colorful brocade robes were soaked through.

"I'm in the deep palace, and I don't know much about you people's flamboyant intestines, so I don't know how to deal with this matter, so I will ask you, the eunuch holding a pen, what crime should I be guilty of asking for benefits from the common people?
Don't tell me about the Great Ming Law.

You Wang Chengen speak for yourself. "

The great eunuch Wang Cheng'en knelt on the ground, pounded his head on the ground, and made a loud noise.

"Long live lord, servants should die, please calm down, long live lord, it's important to take care of the dragon's body, long live lord..."

Zhu Youjian snorted coldly, and said, "Let me take care of the dragon's body for nothing!"

"Continuing like this, the bone, marrow, and flesh of the dragon of the Ming Dynasty will be slowly eaten away, and it will become an empty shell that no one wants!
Compared with Da Ming's Jiangshan Sheji, my dragon body is simply a fart!
You are all my right arm and right arm, the people I can rely on and trust the most, but who would have expected that once you are within three or five feet away from me, each of you is a master, a long live master.

It just doesn't make sense! "

I have been living a comfortable life recently, learning foreign languages ​​day and night.

Even the idiot emperor himself felt a little crooked.

Although it is said that governing the country is not about fighting and killing, the majesty of the emperor in front of his courtiers still cannot be left alone.

Otherwise, with the temperament of these dog slaves, I don't know how they will run amok.

"Li Zicheng, you are the witness to this matter, and at the same time, you are also the most direct victim. Tell me, how should you deal with that dog slave?"

Li Zicheng was stunned for a long time, unable to say a word.

This Long Live Lord is indeed wise and mighty!

There are rumors that the current Long Live Lord is a big idiot, the biggest prodigal son in the history of the Ming Dynasty, idle around all day long, greedy for money and lustful, taking the lead in selling officials and nobles, taking money and breaking the law...

It seems that this is not the case.

This is simply the ancient sage!

"Long live lord..."

Li Zicheng kowtowed his head seven or eight times, his throat was choked, his tiger eyes were full of tears, and he said in a harsh voice, "Long Live God can sympathize with the sufferings of the people, and never tolerate the corruption and perversion of the people around him. He is really a holy king through the ages!"

Zhu Youjian: "..."

This Li Dayan, what do you think?
Why are you talking and crying?
Returning to the ancient sage, as long as you don’t disagree with me and dig up the ancestral grave of our old Zhu’s family in Fengyang, I will thank you, Li Dayan’s eighteenth generation ancestor!
"Okay, you are Ling Lingba, my secret agent, and you can be regarded as one of my people." Zhu Youjian's face gradually turned calm, and he said gently: "Then try this case on my behalf.

Remember, don't be soft-hearted.

To deal with those moths of the court, no matter whether he is the king of the sun or wearing a tiger fur hat, or the buzzing and disturbing flies and mosquitoes, as long as he dares to reach out.

Or, if you stretched out your hand before, you chopped them up for me! "

Zhu Youjian took off a jade pendant casually, and said: "Li Zicheng, you have taken this token from me, and you are my imperial envoy, so go handle the case now.

By the way, how old are you this year? "

Li Zicheng took the jade pendant, and was about to kowtow and bow nine times for a set of 'Rainbow Fart', when he suddenly heard Zhu Youjian asking about his age, he couldn't help being stunned.

"Grassman, cough, Weichen was born in August 34th year of the Wanli Dynasty. This year... he is about 23 years old..."

Li Zicheng said with some uncertainty.

After experiencing so many things, even he himself felt that he should be approaching middle age.

Unexpectedly, he was suddenly asked by the Long Live Lord, and only then did he realize that he is not yet [-] years old!
The idiot emperor Zhu Youjian was also taken aback for a moment, then laughed loudly, and cursed: "Well, you bastard, you have a black beard, and you pretend to be an old man?
Hahaha, I thought you were a middle-aged greasy uncle! "

Li Zicheng grinned in embarrassment, and said: "Your humble minister, you look older..."

"Still looking old? From my point of view, you are clearly old." Zhu Youjian stroked his chin, which was as clean as jade, "However, generally speaking, you are still five or six years older than me.

How about this, I will be married to Jinlan with you, how about it? "

"By the way, I will introduce another person to you, Zheng Zhilong, Zheng Feihuang!"

Zhu Youjian is in a good mood. If you and I are married to Jinlan, we are brothers of the opposite sex. If you really want to rebel in the future, you won't go to Fengyang to dig up the ancestral graves of your sworn brothers, right?

This wave, steady profit.

"Mr. Fei Huang is my sworn brother, born in March 32, Wanli Dynasty, two years older than you, Li Zicheng, so he can be regarded as our elder brother!"

This operation by the idiot emperor Zhu Youjian completely fooled everyone.

Especially Li Zicheng and Zheng Zhilong were tongue-tied for a while, unable to utter a word.

This Long Live Lord, he is so unbelievable that he will be married to Jinlan every now and then!

The great eunuch Wang Chengen, who knelt aside and shivered, secretly breathed a sigh of relief.

This time, he himself escaped a catastrophe.

As for the dead eunuchs under his command, let him go, the bastard who wants to squeeze a few drops of blood from the common people deserves his own misfortune!

I have to say that over the years, the bad ethos of the eunuch party really needs to be rectified...

"Come on, big brother, second brother, brother, let me treat you to tea!"

"As for the rituals of burning incense and praying, and Taoyuan's triple knot, let's just skip it, hahaha."

"During the Three Kingdoms period, Liu Guanzhang and Taoyuan were sworn brothers."

"Today, the three of us are gathered in the Peach Blossom City on Pengbao Island. It is a very appropriate occasion. Let the historian record it as a three-way marriage between Peach Blossoms and Peach Blossoms!"

Zhu Youjian filled a bowl of tea with his own hands, put it in front of Li Zicheng who was stunned, and said with a proud smile: "Come here, second brother, please drink tea!"

"Thank you, Long Live God..."

Li Zicheng's calves were soft, and he felt that his crotch was a little hot and humid.

Married Jinlan with the emperor...

Li Zicheng couldn't believe it when word got out and Village Chief Zhang was killed.

However, the tea bowl in his hand was really hot, and Li Zicheng couldn't help biting his tongue to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

"Come on, Mr. Fei Huang, my dear brother, I will bring you some tea."

Zhu Youjian picked up the teapot and filled a bowl of tea for Zheng Zhilong, who was also a bit confused, and then walked back to the dragon chair and sat down: "The status has been decided, but the two brothers don't have any psychological pressure.

As for me, I'm actually quite righteous in my heart, as long as I don't dig up my ancestral grave, and don't force me to hang myself on that crooked-neck tree on Meishan Mountain, I will respect the two elder brothers from the bottom of my heart! "

Zheng Zhilong: "..."

Li Zicheng: "..."

Where is this going?!

What I said just now was good, but it suddenly involved such unlucky things as 'digging the ancestor's grave' and 'hanging yourself from a tree with a crooked neck'...

"Okay, stop gossiping," Zhu Youjian pulled back his expression, and shouted in a deep voice, "Zheng Zhilong and Li Zicheng obey orders!"

"Zheng Zhilong, within three months, build three big cities and three hundred miles of railways on Taiwan's Pengbao Island, and build forts on all coastlines suitable for landing. No foreigner, black widow, etc. are allowed to land. !

Li Zicheng, let's try the eunuch's corruption case first, don't worry about my face, let him die if he deserves to be killed!
After finishing this case, I still have a secret mission, waiting for you, the big inner secret agent, to complete.

Dismissed! "

(End of this chapter)