Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Chapter 67 Do you want to be your own master’s wife?
The foundation for crosstalk in the postgraduate entrance examination is based on the foundation of the traditional crosstalk "Wenchanghui".

In "Article Meeting", the funny man at the beginning talks a lot of nonsense, saying that his poems are praised by famous people, but what he reads out is the lyrics of a very famous traditional tune. He himself is still engaged in an ordinary industry, such as pulling a cart, selling pancakes, etc.

In the crosstalk "Graduate Entrance Examination", Qi Long made a lot of exaggerated statements at the beginning, relying on his appearance and seemingly professional evaluation of schools to make himself seem very powerful.

The last one is about studying which of salt, vinegar and other condiments can make the human skin whiter. Combined with the beginning saying that Luan Yunping learned to scrub baths in Tsinghua University, the crosstalk ended with a sentence "You also learned to scrub baths".

Among the specific audience group of college students, the on-site response was quite good.

These days, all walks of life are taking exams, so college is not the end, and many college students have to continue taking exams.

I know more or less about the postgraduate entrance examination, so I talk about things that people understand. If I'm right, it can be entertaining, and if I'm wrong, it can have the effect of a "wrong way of speaking" like a crosstalk, which is also entertaining.

He is just a crosstalk actor, not the postgraduate entrance examination tutor in the video. He doesn't need to be so professional, as long as he can make people laugh.

No student preparing for the postgraduate entrance examination would use a crosstalk as a teaching material. Just laugh it off.

The Wire Festival special was in full swing. Although Qi Long had no personal performance tasks, he still went twice.

Once there was a special performance of group crosstalk. He accompanied Dongqiang's parents, who were also his godfather and godmother, to listen to the crosstalk live. Dongqiang also had a show with Guo Qilin and Yu Qian, which was also a work accumulated from the show. Guo Qilin said, "The supporting role is not good," and Dongqiang beat him up.

Guo Qilin invited his master Yu Qian to come over, and when Yu Qian heard him say that "the supporting role is not good enough", he also joined the army to beat his apprentice.

It was said that crosstalk was an art of language, but in the end it turned into a fight.

Qi Long was watching the fun with a smile on his face. Gao Qi, the biological father of Gao Dongqiang, was standing nearby, shouting loudly with his hands shaped like trumpets.

"Hit that Dong Qiang on the head!"

"Those who have grudges should take revenge, those who have grievances should complain, beat Dong Qiang."

Dong Qiang glared at the audience after hearing this, but when he saw that it was his biological father, he turned around immediately. Qin Xiaoxian took this opportunity to hit Dong Qiang on the head, then ran away, much to the audience's delight.

Qi Long gave his godfather a thumbs up: "Godfather, you are really his real father!"

"Hahaha, let's watch the fun!" Gao Qi, who is also a playful man, shouted casually.

After the chaos, Dongqiang pointed to the side of the stage and said, "I just heard people shouting to beat Dongqiang. I turned around and saw my father!"

Gao Qi pushed Qi Long to stand up. The audience who didn't notice this side saw that it was Qi Long who stood up, and they burst into laughter again!
In addition to this performance where Qi Long came, the next one was a special performance of drum songs. Lao Guo, Wang Hui and Guo Qilin would all go on stage to sing. Qi Long was responsible for the announcement, and he started to make jokes as soon as he came on stage.

"Originally, the announcer was Lord Hou, or Hou Zhen, but he got injured. Two days ago, he was rehearsing with the Drum Music Society. When he was walking back after introducing the actors, he kept staring at the girls with his side eyes. He accidentally bumped into the door frame, so it was my turn."

There was a chuckle from the audience.

"Next, please enjoy Daiyu Burning Books, performed by Zhang Wanyi!"

Amid applause, Qi Long returned from the side curtain and Zhang Wanyi came on stage from the side curtain. Qi Long stared at the little girl and bumped his head against the door frame. This funny body gag immediately caused bursts of laughter.

You are talking about the Marquis, but you are like this too!
Zhang Wanyi was also laughing and almost burst out laughing.

Qi Long is not making things up. This is what Lao Guo said. Many kids are nervous when they go on stage for the first time. You should liven up the atmosphere by leading the audience.

Qi Long agreed and spoke a short paragraph, and he also spoke the rest during the subsequent announcement.

"Look at these girls in the drum music club. Oh, their bracelets and necklaces are so beautiful. We crosstalk performers can't wear them. Why? The audience looks at the tickets in their hands, looks at the jewelry on the girls, smiles smugly, and proudly says 'I bought it for her'. But it's not the same for our crosstalk performers. The audience looks at the tickets, looks at the watches on him, and says with a sad face: 'I bought it for him'!" "In fact, I have always wanted to learn drum music. I have even thought of a stage name for myself, Qi Wanlian. Whenever I go to my senior brother Guo Degang's house during festivals, I will say to my sister-in-law: Sister-in-law, please accept the elegiac couplet."

"Qi Lin didn't learn this drum song properly. If you think he doesn't sing well, don't scold the child or my sister-in-law. If you really want to scold, you can just scold his father and General Yu Qian, right?"

In the language art of crosstalk, when there is a pause, the semicolon will form the effect of a colon, and the joke will come.

After these two Wire Mesh Festival crosstalk specials with Qi Long as the audience and announcer, it was the last day of the Wire Mesh Festival. Just like the first day, there was also a luxurious lineup. Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang's programs were ranked behind the group crosstalk by Lao Guo, Yu Qian and Gao Feng.

"That was a show for three people. Whoever has the slowest reaction will suffer!" Qi Long accurately evaluated the relationship between the three.

Dong Qiang nodded: "Yes, whoever is slower will be the son!"

"All three are very outstanding. For example, Gao Feng is a disciple of Mr. Fan Zhenyu (yes). Guo Degang and I are from the same school and are disciples of Mr. Hou Yaowen (yes). Mr. Yu Qian and Dong Qiang are both disciples of Yue Yunpeng."

"Yeah, that's nonsense, I'm already your grandson?" Gao Dongqiang hurriedly stopped him.

Qi Long spread his hands: "Look, I was slow to react, and I suffered a loss, so who are you?"

"I am Mr. Shi Fukuan's apprentice!" Dong Qiang said seriously.

Qi Long nodded: "Mr. Shi's apprentice, you are like Mr. Fan, Mr. Hou, and Mr. Shi, all of whom are excellent crosstalk actors. It's a pity that the three teachers are gone, alas."

Gao Dongqiang reacted quickly this time and pushed Qi Long away: "My wife is still here?"

The reaction was so fast that I made a slip of the tongue.

The audience burst into laughter, and Dongqiang realized that he had said something wrong, and hurried to make amends into the microphone.

Qi Long shook his head slightly, meaning: I'll make it happen.

After the laughter, Qi Long suddenly realized: "So, you are Shi Fukuan's husband?"

"Sir" can be a respectful title or a way to address one's husband. It has a double meaning and a slip of the tongue can seem like a joke.

Qi Long was still smug: "If I hadn't reacted quickly, you would have taken advantage of me. If you were Shi Fukuan's teacher, I would have to call you Master!"

It looked more like a burden. Dongqiang also flipped through it: "What does a master do? Just a master's aunt will do!"

"Is that reasonable? Is that reasonable?" Qi Long asked in return: "You want to be your own master's wife? Just like Guo Degang."

"What happened to Guo Degang?"

"He learned drum music from his wife Wang Hui. So, doesn't that mean Wang Hui is his master and he is his master's wife?"

Gao Dongqiang didn't understand and stood there: "Wait for me, I'll sort out this relationship!"

"Don't even think about your IQ. Did you know that you are actually a twin?"

"I'm a twin?"

"You died on the day you were born. You are your brother. Figure it out!"

Gao Dongqiang was completely stunned, looking like his CPU was burned out. Not to mention him, the audience also had to figure it out for a while!
(End of this chapter)