Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Chapter 73: Performing on the Ground
After the ranking was re-determined, everyone received different treatments according to their ranking.

Uncle Master Qin Xiaoxian and Uncle Junior Master Qi Long were each followed by two high-end cameras. Yunhe Jiuxiao and the other three were accompanied by an ordinary camera. The last four had head-mounted sports cameras, handheld sports cameras, selfie sticks and mobile phones, and mobile phones without selfie sticks.

Zhang Helun, who fell into the Haizi class, had to use his mobile phone to film himself to have filming materials, otherwise there would be no shots.

The most uncomfortable thing was that the battery of his mobile phone was only 30%, which made him anxious about low battery. He kept shouting to leave quickly so that he could find a place to borrow a power bank.

In addition to the shooting treatment, the travel methods were also different. Qi Long and Qin Xiaoxian rode in a Rolls-Royce with a starry sky roof and the three words "Yunhe Jiu" on it. It was an ordinary sedan. The three of them squeezed in the back seat, and the photographer was in the passenger seat.

When they got to the last five, they got into a van that looked quite old. It was shaking and rocking them so hard that they almost vomited the lunch they had just eaten.

Everyone took a car to the next mission location, a market that was about to officially open. Here, Qin Xiaoxian and Qi Long had to each select four team members and divide them into two groups to compete.

The content of the competition is simple: perform on the street.

The two teams were less than 20 meters apart, diagonally opposite each other, performing on the street in a market where street performers were allowed to perform. The program staff, square dance aunties from the nearby community, and some old men who were dragged along by the aunties were passers-by.

Each of them holds a Comedy Club medal given by the program team. They will vote for the group whose performance they like, which is equivalent to a reward for street performances. In the end, the group with the most medals wins. As for what to perform, that depends on their own abilities.

Qin Xiaoxian selected the players first and chose Gao Dongqiang right away. He thought that Qi Long and Dongqiang had such a good understanding of each other.

Qi Long smiled slightly: "Then I choose Yue Longgang!"

Most of the elderly people still watch TV.

Even when they are playing with their phones, they are watching short videos that earn gold coins which can be exchanged for money. The quality of the short videos on those express versions of software that pay money varies greatly, and there are very few that are related to crosstalk. Among these people, those who have been on TV are definitely more familiar.

Especially CCTV. Qi Long and Dong Qiang won the crosstalk competition this year and showed their faces, but Yue Yunpeng performed a skit on the Spring Festival Gala two years ago, and performed a crosstalk with Sun Yue last year. So his face recognition on the Spring Festival Gala should be higher in the past two years.

This selection is a great profit.

"Uncle, why did you take down my calligraphy?" Yue Yunpeng walked over with a frustrated look.

Qi Long laughed: "Aren't you from the Dragon generation now? I don't think Long Peng is as easy to pronounce as Long Gang!"

Both sides selected their players in turn and the lineup was determined: Qin Xiaoxian's team, Gao Dongqiang, Meng Hetang, Luan Yunping and Shaobing.

The Qilong group consists of Yue Yunpeng, Guo Qilin, Zhang Helun and Cao Heyang.

After both parties entered, they briefly discussed their respective ways of attracting customers, then opened the market, and all the middle-aged women and men came in.

Qi Long started singing immediately. When he performed on the ground in the past, he would make a circle at the beginning. The circle means to gather, so that the audience would gather.

Sing little songs, have little arguments, write on the sand, and all kinds of things.

Qi Long sang "Question and Answer Song", a popular ditty.

Here, Yue Yunpeng, Guo Qilin, Zhang Helun, and Cao Heyang sang: [What kind of person is self-respecting? What kind of person is good-looking? What kind of person is climbing up the ladder? What kind of person is beaten and scolded? ]

The four of them sang a line each and asked questions to Qi Long.

It's a question-and-answer song, with one question and one answer.

When the question was raised, I was curious about the answer, so I came to listen naturally.

Although Qi Long had memorized the lyrics by heart, he still acted embarrassed when he heard the question and was thinking about how to answer. When all four had finished singing, Qi Long raised his head and opened his eyes wide, as if he had figured it out.

[Those who are self-respecting and self-esteem are people who have achieved enlightenment, those who are good-looking and colorful are people who are rich, those who climb up the ladder are thieves, and those who are beaten and scolded are villains! ]

This question-and-answer song is not just one part, there is also a back part, with the same lyrics, but if you replace the person with a door, a flower, or a god, there will be different answers. Next, their groups also performed one by one, with four people asking one question each, and Qi Long answered four sentences in one breath.

[Self-respect is the God of Wealth, good looks is the Door God, climbing up the ladder is the Mountain God, and being beaten and scolded is the Plague God.]

When it came to the flowers, Qi Long successfully answered the first three: peony, hundred flowers, and morning glory. But when it came to the last one, he hesitated.

The four people thought they had stumped him: [What's the point of being beaten and scolded? ]

Qi Long had another idea: [Being beaten and scolded is like playing with cotton! ]

"Great!!!" The uncles and aunts clapped enthusiastically.

Compared to the excitement here, there were not so many people from Qin Xiaoxian's group who were arguing over there. Those who couldn't stand it directly showed off their martial arts. Meng Hetang directly showed off his unique skills, the iron threshold.

Just grab one leg from the front and jump up with the other leg to pass through it.

There was a burst of applause, and many old men and women from Qi Long's side were attracted over there.

"We would like to invite Yue Yunpeng to do a somersault!" Qi Long shouted hurriedly upon seeing this.

When the audience heard Yue Yunpeng doing somersaults, they became interested. Looking back, Yue Yunpeng was stunned.

"You don't even know this? Uncle will teach you!" Qi Long did a somersault while lying on the ground, which earned him cheers.

Shaobing over there refused to accept the challenge and immediately did the same somersault but with a somersault as well.

The two fat guys, Yue Yunpeng and Zhang Helun, were asked to demonstrate it, but they couldn't do it and made a fool of themselves, which caused laughter.

Whether it's Qi Long's carp jump or Meng Hetang's iron threshold, they are skills that one must prepare to play the role of a martial arts family in crosstalk, and they all require real kung fu!

Even though Guo Degang is short and chubby, he can still do somersaults. It’s all the result of practice.

But it was obvious that only Qi Long could do somersaults, while the others could only make jokes and soon they failed to retain the audience.

On the other side, Gao Dongqiang, this muscular and reckless man, showed his power.

He held Qin Xiaoxian in one hand and Meng Hetang in the other, and squatted down and stood up; the two of them sat on each other's backs and could do push-ups with one hand, which immediately attracted everyone's attention.

Qi Long shouted, "It seems that I have to show off my unique skills. Bring me the white marble powder, and I will write on the white sand!"

He took the powdered white marble, threw it into his hand, and began to write on the ground, singing as he wrote.

[One character is written like a beam, two characters are written like a short top and a long bottom, and three characters are written like a "川" upside down.]

Writing with powder doesn't sound that difficult at first glance, but when you sprinkle white sand on it, the words look like they were written with a brush, with the brush strokes complete and neat and beautiful. This requires skill.

The proper way to sprinkle sand is to make your hands into a funnel shape and sprinkle sand downwards.

But Qi Long, who had never done this before and whose master had never taught him, just imitated. Later he figured it out on his own. He used his fingers to pinch and sprinkle it down, which was much simpler than the proper way.

"Cross Brocade" is not only sung from one to ten, but after singing it you can also add a stroke to each word to change it into a new word, and it also has a tune.

[Add a stroke to the ten characters and you get the word "Qian", which means "one thousand miles away to find my brother Guan Yuchang". Add a dot to the nine characters and you get the word "Wan", which means "pills, powders, pastes and pills" are offered to the King of Medicine. Add the eight characters and you get the word "Ren", which means "one person", which means "everyone praises Song Jiang".]

There aren’t many places where you can see this these days, so many old men and women were immediately attracted back.

(End of this chapter)