Why not hang yourself on the southeast tree

Mao Dajie cooks and Mao Jiawen washes the dishes.

The little guy has been shouldering the heavy burden of washing pots and dishes since third grade and never shirks his responsibilities because of the heavy homework.

Three years ago, that is the year when I bought this unfinished house.

At that time, their family of three lived in a small house that Liu Fang had bought before marriage. In order to raise a down payment for a school district house, they put that house up to the real estate agency, but it was sold in less than half a month.

As a result, it exploded and ended badly...

The family was happily waiting to move in and start decorating their new house, but then a bolt of lightning struck and it felt like the sky was falling.

Mao Dajie arranged all the health, accident, serious illness, retirement and other insurances he could think of for his family, but he did not buy insurance for a safe and smooth handover of the new house.

(Whatever, this type of insurance does not exist┓( ′?` )┏).

Mao Jiawen, a third grader, was confused.

Watching my parents come back from the construction site and cry;

I watched my father resign from the insurance company, take off his suit and go to the fish shop, where he learned how to kill fish and do business in a messy way.

Watching grandparents come to the house and cry, smash things, overturn tables, point at mom’s nose, and call her a spendthrift woman;

I watched my father rush in to protect his wife, but was slapped by grandma and turned into a pig's head.

At that time, he also wanted to follow his father's steps and rush forward to be the hero to protect his mother. As a result, as soon as he jumped up, his grandfather grabbed the back of his neck and he couldn't move, like a chicken.

Grandpa usually doesn't say anything, but when something really happens, he becomes very naughty!!!

[Jiawen, are there any boys in your class who wear skirts? ]

Liu Fang suddenly remembered that someone in the parents’ group was talking about the circumcision of a little boy, and asked casually.

Mao Jiawen poured the dirty dishwater into the toilet over and over again and was about to mop the floor when he heard these words.

He turned his head, extremely surprised.

[? Mom, how did you know? Did you check our class surveillance?! ]

[Ahem, no, didn’t you ask those classmates? ]

[What's there to ask? If you want to wear a skirt, just wear it. Aren't I wearing colorful skirts in all the photos of me when I was a child?! ]

[You’re still bringing up something that happened before I was a year old, you stingy guy…]

Speaking of this, Mao Dajie couldn't help but touch his nose. Those little skirts were all bought by him, and he dressed his son up when he was old enough to have no resistance.

Who told him that the girl he had been waiting for for more than nine months had grown so big...

He reluctantly gave away the room full of Barbies, dolls, and mini skirts that he had stockpiled during pregnancy.

He turned his back, clasped his hands together, and muttered to himself:

[God bless me, the second child must be a girl! ]

Liu Fang was hesitant to speak, so she punched Mao Dajie and signaled him to go and speak.

[Come on, son, let's go and have some private conversations between men.]

Mao Dajie hooked his son's neck and took him to the toilet.

【Prosperous! 】

I wanted to follow too, but the mistress grabbed my tail.

【Ouch~】

It’s over, it’s over. I violated the rules - Mao Dajie and his son strictly forbade me to have physical contact with pregnant women, for fear that she would be infected with Toxoplasma gondii.

But I can clearly see that every month they would pin me to the ground and comb out fleas and ticks from me, and then give me a dose of internal and external deworming pills. The taste was crunchy, bitter and astringent, and I can't describe it.

Being a dog is hard, and being a guard dog for a pregnant woman is even harder.

The father and son closed the door and were whispering in the bathroom, and there were sounds of someone pulling and taking off their pants.

Tsk, my son has grown up and knows how to be shy.

When he came out, his face was red, spreading from his forehead to his collarbone, which was quite a sight.

He spoke in a bad tone and glanced at his father with a reproachful look.

[Mom, adults shouldn't ask about children's affairs! ]

Liu Fang and Mao Dajie exchanged glances, and he nodded heavily.

What it means is that the time has come to cut it off.

Three more days of painless childhood passed.

Mao Jiawen was very active and worked overtime on Friday to finish two days' homework. Before going to bed, he washed the dog who had been clamoring to sleep with him, and the two brothers slept well in each other's arms.

Early Saturday morning, Mao Dajie drove the mother and son to the Maternal and Child Health Care Hospital. As soon as his son got out of the car, he stepped on the accelerator and drove away, leaving him no chance to react and escape.

[Mom?! Didn’t you say we were going to the movies? My classmate said Transformers 5 is great, the special effects are awesome!]

[Ahem, let's go upstairs and have a chat with the doctor first, ah! ]

Liu Fang was also a little embarrassed, but unfortunately Mao Dajie had to take care of his business.

Originally, a surgery like this that requires a month's recovery period should be performed during the winter and summer vacations. Unfortunately, hospitals in big cities have too many patients and a shortage of human resources, making it difficult to get an appointment.

I was able to get an appointment with the expert through connections, but the appointments for the winter and summer vacations have already been fully booked.

She’s a female expert, what a coincidence.

Mao Jiawen's pants were stripped off again. His eyes were filled with tears, and his face showed a look of forbearance and accusation.

Liu Fang felt very sad when seeing this.

[As parents, don't you usually pay attention? The skin can't be opened, and the inside is inflamed and swollen. Surgery cannot be performed today. Anti-inflammatory treatment must be given first.]

Mao Jiawen temporarily escaped the danger. Without any help, he jumped out of bed, put on his pants, sat on a stool away from the doctor, and said nothing.

Liu Fang was so wronged.

[My son is older now and he doesn’t want us to help him take a bath, and he never said anything about it.]

She cursed Mao Dajie in her heart for not looking more carefully. If he ruined the child's life, just imagine how anxious he would be.

After picking up a few boxes of cleansing products and topical medications, the mother and son stood in front of the outpatient building, looking at each other.

[Mom, you said you wanted to watch a movie, you weren't lying to me, were you?! ]

[Ah? This...haha, of course not, let's go, mom will buy the tickets right away!]

Mao Jiawen: You still say no...

Okay, she is a pregnant woman, I will be magnanimous and not make a fuss about it.

What is coming will eventually come. Mao Dajie paid extra money to buy a number for next Saturday from a scalper.

The day came in the blink of an eye.

This time, Liu Fang was so upset that she refused to go to the hospital, so she called Lao Liu, and the father and daughter teamed up to cover her son-in-law's shift for a day.

Mao Jiawen insisted on not letting his father stay in the clinic, but when he saw him walk out and close the door, he became so nervous that he wanted to pee...

Mao Dajie took the receipt and scanned the code to pay. Wow, the surgery cost 1600 yuan.

It’s still that female expert.

The voice is gentle, but the words are fierce.

[Take off your clothes, lie down, and don't move. 】

Mao Jiawen: ┭┮﹏┭┮

Weak, pitiful, and helpless.

He could only hold on to the mattress beneath him.

The female doctor turned on the cold light shadowless lamp, which gradually focused on a certain place.

Mao Jiawen shivered cleverly, and the little bird began to tremble as well, becoming even more frightened.

The female doctor put on gloves, thought for a moment, and took two steps forward to fasten the safety belt hanging under the bed for him.

Well, I really can’t move this time.

The surgical area was coated with a large amount of iodine and felt cool.

Mao Jiawen didn't dare to raise his upper body to look, he just stared at the ceiling above his head. All he could think about was the scene in last week's movie where Bumblebee swept through thousands of enemies with a 40-meter-long machete.

【ah--】

A scream.

Both men inside and outside the door shuddered.

[What are you yelling about? It's time to get anesthesia. Just bear with it, little man. It won't hurt in a while!]

The doctor has to perform more than a dozen such minor operations a day. He is well aware that the little boy needs to save face and knows how to handle it.

Mao Jiawen's tears were already pouring out, and she bit her lips hard to keep from breathing.

The little Jiawen in my heart roared loudly: You are not a man, you say it doesn’t hurt and it doesn’t hurt, try giving your little bird a needle, wuwawawawawawa…

Put the ring on, cut a circle evenly and carefully with a knife, sew it up, tie a knot, beautiful!

【Little guy, it’s done! 】

The doctor grabbed his armpits, lifted him up and put him on the ground.

There was no bloodshed, nor was there any complete annihilation.

[Don’t wear pants these two days. Ask your dad for a long T-shirt to wear. A skirt is also fine. Hahaha.]

The operation takes less than five minutes.

Mao Jiawen will need a month to recover from the shock and trauma he suffered, and he will also receive several fried chicken, hamburgers, milk tea, robot models, and submachine guns...

Before he even opened the door, Mao Dajie felt like his wallet had taken a severe hit.