Siheyuan, integrating everything, cultivating the city

He was also not very lenient with his words, often saying that Li Xiangqian was too repressed and should learn to release himself. Today, Li Xiangqian was a little confused, and he knew he needed to find someone to talk to.

"Knock, knock, knock." He knocked on Xu Damao's door and stood at the door waiting for a few seconds. Xu Damao came out of the house and saw Li Xiangqian. He raised his eyebrows and asked with a smile: "Hey, why are you here so early today? What's the matter?"

"I have something to say. Can I come in and talk?" Li Xiangqian's voice was a little low, as if a heavy burden was weighing on him.

Xu Damao glanced at him, and seeing that Li Xiangqian's expression was not right, he immediately put away his smile: "Of course, come in." As he spoke, he opened the door and motioned Li Xiangqian to go in.

Li Xiangqian walked into the house. The atmosphere inside was warmer than outside. The sunlight shone through the window onto the wooden floor, creating mottled shadows. Xu Damao didn't hesitate to ask him to sit down, and then he walked to the small table next to him and started making tea.

"Tell me, what's wrong?" Xu Damao sat down and looked at Li Xiangqian with concern in his eyes, yet directness.

Li Xiangqian lowered his head and remained silent for a few seconds, feeling a little entangled. He always felt that he had too many burdens, and no one could help him share these burdens. Even Wang Cuihua might not understand how tired he was, although she was always by his side. However, when those repressed emotions accumulated to a certain extent, he found that he could no longer pretend that nothing had happened.

"Recently... I've been feeling very confused." Li Xiangqian finally spoke, his voice a little hoarse, as if something was blocking his throat. "I feel a little lost, and I have no motivation to do anything."

Xu Damao frowned slightly after hearing this. Although he didn't say it explicitly, his eyes showed that he felt the same way as Li Xiangqian. "You know, I've noticed that you've been keeping your head down lately and keeping everything to yourself." He said, "Tell me what's going on. Is it about work or life?"

Li Xiangqian was silent for a moment, and decided to speak out. He felt that if he kept it to himself, it would probably get worse. "It's... something that happened recently." He looked up at Xu Damao, with a hint of confusion in his eyes, "I... I ran into my ex-girlfriend by chance today. I know that the past should have been over, but the moment I saw her, I had an inexplicable feeling in my heart, as if something had pulled me back to the past."

Xu Damao frowned, thought for a moment, and sighed: "I understand you. Many times we want to get rid of the past, but some things always suddenly come to our mind at a certain moment."

Li Xiangqian lowered his head, his tone becoming somewhat weak: "I know that I am married and have children, and my life is not as simple as it used to be, but why do I feel so uneasy every time I see her, as if I have never really let go."

Xu Damao listened and thought for a moment: "Have you ever thought that maybe you regard the memories of your past self and her as some kind of regret or unfinished part. Your current life and responsibilities make you ignore your inner needs, which leads to that confused feeling."

Li Xiangqian took a deep breath, a trace of confusion flashed in his eyes: "Maybe, but you know, when I went home today, the panic has not disappeared. I feel like I can't hold on any longer, as if everything is collapsing, and I can't comfort myself."

"You are trapped by the images of the past and cannot let go." Xu Damao said slowly, "You must understand that no matter what you chose in the past, you can never go back to the past. Those days are over. Your current responsibilities and future are what you really have to face."

Li Xiangqian looked down at the teacup in his hand, and the tea in front of him gradually blurred. He knew that Xu Damao was right, but the uneasiness in his heart could not be dissipated. Could it be true? He was becoming more and more uneasy. Was it not because there was something wrong with his life itself, but because he could not calm down?

"I know what you mean." Li Xiangqian finally spoke, his voice a little low, "It's just... sometimes I really feel too tired, as if all the choices have pushed me into a corner, and I don't know how to find myself again."

Xu Damao did not answer immediately. He was silent for a moment, then gently patted Li Xiangqian on the shoulder: "You have taken the first step by saying it. You are no longer the Li Xiangqian who only focused on work and suppressed his emotions. No matter what, you still have the ability to face your heart, face life, and face those choices you dare not face."

Li Xiangqian stayed at Xu Damao's house for a while and seemed to feel a little relieved, but he knew that this could not solve the fundamental problem. On the way home, he walked absent-mindedly, unconsciously quickening his pace, but then stopped and lowered his head helplessly. Even though he knew that the troubles in his heart had not been completely released, the feeling of being suppressed was slightly better, at least it was not so suffocating for him.

Walking to the corner, he caught a glimpse of a small shop selling daily necessities, and his eyes unconsciously stopped on a pair of socks in the window. The socks were simple in design, dark gray in color, and should feel soft. Li Xiangqian suddenly had an idea in his mind - maybe a new pair of socks could bring him a different feeling.

He pushed open the door and the bell rang. The owner of the store, who was sitting behind the counter, looked up and saw him, nodded, and didn't seem surprised. Li Xiangqian walked slowly to the shelf, picked up a pair of socks, and squeezed them gently in his hands. The soft touch seemed to soothe his inner restlessness to some extent. He stared at the socks, thinking that the socks he had worn for so many years had become worn out and always made him feel uncomfortable.

He suddenly felt that changing into a new pair of socks might help him get rid of his inner anxiety temporarily. At least, a little change in life might bring him some different feelings.

He picked up the socks and walked over to the counter. "This pair," he said, his voice calm.

The boss nodded, took the socks and packed them up: "You look a little tired recently, what's wrong? Is work not going well?"

Li Xiangqian was stunned for a moment and did not answer immediately, but his mind was turning rapidly. Yes, work was not going well, life was not going well, and everything was overwhelming him. "Nothing, I just thought that changing some small things might make me relax a little." He smiled, handed the money to the boss, and quickly turned around and left with the new pair of socks.