The unscrupulous system forced me to frantically test the small black room

It was not until today that Xu Yanze realized that Tao Zhi had never hated him from beginning to end, nor had he ever felt disgusted with himself because of his homosexuality.

Even the love of Tao Zhi that she had been dreaming about in her dreams was actually right in front of her, but she missed it and misunderstood him for so many years.

During those years, bitterness and obsession built up in my heart like a dam, but at this moment it collapsed.

The emotions after the collapse swept over like a raging torrent, drowning Xu Yanze again and almost suffocating him.

More than once, he had developed despicable resentment and anger in his heart, and time and time again he couldn't help but be jealous of Tao Zhi's unstinting love for Gong Cheng.

Knowing that both himself and Gong Cheng were stuck in the quagmire, Tao Zhi extended a hand to Gong Cheng without hesitation, but was unwilling to save himself, and even used vulgar words to humiliate himself, pushing himself deeper and lowering himself.

He saw the brilliance and excellence of Gongcheng, but regarded himself as mud that he didn't want to get involved in.

However, only now did Xu Yanze realize that Tao Zhi's gaze had once lingered on him, and his heart had once beat violently because of him.

Although she and Tao Zhi had looked into each other's eyes countless times, she was unable to discern the sadness and grievance in his words beneath his poor acting skills.

At that time, I was blinded by inferiority and helplessness, and I didn't even notice the love in his eyes.

Xu Yanze bit his lips tightly, and the taste of blood filled the air between his lips and teeth. His wrist was also bleeding from being bitten by himself, but even so, it could not relieve the severe pain in his heart as if it was being torn apart alive.

By the time Xu Yanze reacted, he had already abandoned his work, bought the ticket and boarded the plane in a daze, and went straight to Tao Zhi's villa after getting off the plane.

It seemed as if every cell in my body was clamoring to see him, to hug him, to express the love that had been suppressed for so many years, and then to tell him the words that had been missed and late for so many years.

Xu Yanze sat on the steps at Tao Zhi's door for a very long time, from day to dusk, until the moon rose high in the sky. The night wind blew gusts of wind. It was clearly not the season for the temperature to drop, but for Xu Yanze, it was freezing cold.

A dozen hours were enough for the out-of-control Xu Yanze to regain his sanity.

Tao Zhi once liked me, but that was a thing of the past.

Now Tao Zhi's heart and eyes are filled with Gong Cheng. Over the years, there has only been Gong Cheng in his heart and no room for anyone else.

The role I played was just that of a close friend of his.

Tao Zhi had known the truth that the love letter was for him several years ago, but he never mentioned that he had once liked her, and never once in all these years did he show the slightest desire to be with her.

He reminded himself more than once not to fall in love with him and not to continue loving him.

Perhaps for Tao Zhi, the naive and ignorant love of his youth has long been put aside, and the joy and bitterness that have never been expressed have long been left behind and completely forgotten as he grew up.

The joy of youth is not even worth mentioning as a topic of joke among friends after drinking.

What he likes is undoubtedly a burden to Tao Zhi now.

He would be troubled if I brought up the past.

I have clearly forced myself to stay calm and sober, and rationality has already regained the upper hand.

But when that familiar figure walked towards him leisurely under the dim moonlight, humming an unknown tune, the impulse in his heart broke through the cage of reason.

Then, I couldn't help but cross the line of friendship and embraced her in my arms.

At this time, Xu Yanze looked at Tao Zhi in front of the hospital bed and said the three words "Lang Buping" with difficulty.

If I were braver now, would there be a chance that I could still grab the hand of the boy who was smiling wildly in the dazzling sunshine?

Even though this possibility is extremely small, Xu Yanze still rushes to it at this moment.

Xu Yanze was just about to blurt out the words that he had kept hidden in his heart for all these years, but was interrupted by Tao Zhi.

Upon hearing this, Tao Zhi tilted his head and thought subconsciously, then asked, "Who is Lang Buping?"

As soon as he asked the question, Tao Zhi realized that he was asking like an idiot. The three words "Lang Buping" seemed to be someone related to Lang Bushin. Since Xu Yanze mentioned such a person, there must be some plot involved.

And I just asked him who he was in such a lively manner. If he was someone Tao Zhi was familiar with in the original text, my question would be really OOC.

Xu Yanze saw that Tao Zhi was a little dazed when he heard Lang Buping's name, and the words he had organized were stuck in his throat.

Tao Zhi doesn't remember Lang Buping? How could that be?

Or was he just pretending not to know?

Tao Zhi's alarm sounded in his heart, and he quickly summoned Fanfan after a long absence, and then urgently asked Fanfan to report Lang Buping's character information.

There was already a look of doubt in Xu Yanze's eyes. After Tao Zhi roughly listened to the information, he immediately spoke to make up for it.

"Look at my memory. I tend to forget things when I get older, especially after the previous injury and rescue. I don't know if it hurt my brain, but I don't remember many things from the past."

"For example, I have almost forgotten everything about my school days. I can hardly remember the names and faces of my old classmates."

"I haven't heard the name Lang Buping for a long time. I was a little confused just now about who he was."

"My mind raced and I remembered that this was my good friend who I grew up with. We knew each other since kindergarten and we did everything together. We used to have a very good relationship."

"But since he went to Germany, we have had less and less contact. I almost forgot about this person. How did you meet him in Germany?" Tao Zhi explained guiltily.

Xu Yanze looked at the evasiveness in Tao Zhi's eyes and the awkward scratching of his head while he spoke, and his heart gradually sank.

He emphasized that he couldn't remember many things. Was he telling himself not to mention the past anymore?

"We just happened to meet." Xu Yanze replied.

"I'm telling you that he has been unreliable since he was a child, and he likes to make up lies to amuse others. Did he say something nonsense to you? Don't take it seriously, he is just like that."

"You're already a grown-up, how can you let yourself get so upset just because of a few words from others without any evidence?" Tao Zhi sighed and complained.

Xu Yanze looked at Tao Zhi, who seemed to be worried about him, and did not speak for a long time.

He really didn't want to mention this matter. He was trying to play dumb and skip this topic, Xu Yanze thought.

Xu Yanze's heart gradually sank, until it reached the bottom. The impulse to express his feelings regardless of the consequences gradually subsided, leaving only slight ripples.

Obviously, Tao Zhi didn't want to hear those words from his own mouth.

Perhaps I should follow his wishes, bury the feelings I once had in my heart, pretend to know nothing and continue to maintain our friendship. This is the best option.

Xu Yanze pursed his lips to suppress his emotions and tried hard to make himself smile.

"I didn't think it through and acted impulsively." Xu Yanze said gently.