life is like this

So there were already eight big men living in this small house, and the spirit of six of them was still very abnormal.

I sat on the sofa dejectedly, not knowing how my life would go on.

When I was very young, I used to fantasize about my future life. At that time, I had a very naive ambition. I wanted to conquer outer space and be a superhero who saved the earth and benefited the world.

When I grew up a bit, I found that children of my age lived so easily. They were always frowning and frightened because they didn't finish their homework, and felt that being hit by an adult a few times was a big event that would fall from the sky.

And I narrowly escaped from death after disaster after another, I touched my leg in plaster, looked at the blood-stained gauze and my peers who fell and cried out of the window, I was only then Gradually understand the difference between me and others.

When I grew up a bit, I was lying on the operating table. At that time, I had already developed resistance to anesthetics. When the anesthetist gave me anesthesia again, I looked at the light of the shadowless lamp and saw the effectiveness of anesthetics. Gradually lose consciousness.

I finally discovered that death was so close to me.

When I grow up again, I still have dreams. Although I gradually understand my insignificance and ordinaryness, I still hope that I can become a very good person and have my own career and responsibility. .

Later, I lay on the operating table more and more times, my health became worse and worse, and the sorrow and resentment in my heart became more and more full.

Those dreams were gradually forgotten by me.

Later, when I grew up a bit, I began to fantasize about my life again in the ward full of disinfectant. At this time, I hoped that I could have a stable life and spend the rest of my life in an ordinary way. No matter how extravagantly I hope to achieve something, even if I gradually become mediocre, I can comfort myself with "ordinary is the true meaning of life".

Later, I really became mediocre day by day, and I became a man who didn’t have much ability and was not liked by others. I always resented the injustice of fate, and became more and more selfish, narrow-minded, and inferior.

Gradually people around me began to hate me and stay away from me.

It's just that those unlucky things still follow me like a shadow, never letting me go.

I am like a hen that has been paralyzed in the nest all day without laying eggs. My eyes can only see the withered straw in the nest. I know that I am terrible, but I still refuse to change in a daze.

In other words, there is no courage to start changing.

Later, I finally saw everything away in the day after day of despair, since it was so unlucky, since it was destined to be mediocre, since it was destined to be unlucky.

Then why don't I go to the wider outside to have a look.

So I used all my money to buy a plane ticket and boarded the plane without hesitation.

I have seen a wider world, encountered more and more unlucky things, and along the way, there are many dangers.

But my life is finally a little bit different.

It got messier and more ridiculous.

I looked at this group of noisy psychopaths in the room. They have very lovable appearances, but they are more dangerous than anyone else. There was a lot of blood, and he killed many innocent people.

Some of these people lost their lives, and their families had to endure great pain, while those who survived endured the pain caused by the mutilation of their bodies, and had to live their entire lives under the strange eyes of others.

The law cannot restrain these people. They are different from ordinary people, and their perception of the world is different from our normal people.

I can't even blame James, he has given up his recipe for me.

However, the life I once dreamed about, the life I planned a long time ago, has already deviated from my original intention and turned upside down.