middle aged

The three of them waited downstairs at Mo Fanfan's house for a whole afternoon, not daring to ring the doorbell or knock on the door, for fear of disturbing Mo Fanfan's grandma and grandfather. Taking advantage of Qi Yunze's inattention, Li Wei picked up a stone and threw it on the window of Mo Pingfan's room. When Mo Pingfan woke up, he put on a coat indiscriminately, opened the door quietly, and slipped out.

At the end of spring and the beginning of summer, the wind was cool, and Mo Fanfan, who had just left the gate of the unit, looked at the three people under the street lamp, their silhouettes were a bit blurred, but in the backlight, they could clearly see a little fat man sitting beside him. On the pier, with his hands resting on his cheeks, a skinny monkey stepped on the stone pier where the little fat man was sitting, with a cigarette in one hand, and a taller one, standing straight under the street lamp, with one hand stuck in the stone pier. In the pocket of the school uniform trousers, he stood for a while with a cigarette lit in one hand, but he didn't see him take a puff, only let the red-stained cigarette butt slowly burn upwards.

After stopping for a while, Mo Pingfan still slowly walked towards the three people.He didn't think about what state to use, and didn't know what tone to use, so Mo Fanfan walked straight to them.

"Pingfan." Seeing a figure gradually become clear in the darkness, Li Wei called out to him. With just one sound, Mo Fanfan's eyes were red and his nose was sore.

"Why are you here?" Resisting the urge to shed tears, Mo Pingfan asked

Hearing his hoarse voice, Qi Yunze couldn't bear it to the extreme. It's been a few days since I saw him. He's lost weight and haggard. Although he tried his best to cover it up, there are thick dark circles under his eyes and a strange sound like torn kraft paper , still betrayed the strength that Mo Pingfan tried his best to build.

"I heard that something happened at your house, and the three of us wanted to come and see you, but we never dared to knock on your door, so we had no choice but to do something wrong." Li Wei raised the stone on his right hand, squeezed A smile uglier than crying came out.

"Ordinary, how could auntie..." The little fat man couldn't help but asked

"When checking the engineering project... from a high place..." Mo Fanfan still covered his face and choked up. He had been avoiding his mother's accident for so many days, and he didn't want to imagine it. Unable to control his eyes, Li Wei poked the little fat man, and Wang Hu also knew that he had said something wrong, so he fell silent for a moment.

Qi Yunze on the side didn't speak silently, but when he heard the whole story, he shook his eyes and took a deep breath of the cigarette. The cigarette in his hand burned to the end in an instant, and the residual temperature of the cigarette burnt Qi Yunze's hand. But he didn't move at all.

Although the sad matter was brought up, Mo Pingfan also knew that the bloody result had become a reality. Although his heart hurt, he was not nearly insane like he was a few days ago.While pushing the glasses, Mo Fanfan quietly brushed the corners of his eyes, but Mo Fanfan still didn't let the tears stay.

"The reality is like this, and there is nothing I can do. The fate between my mother and I ends here, and the only thing I can do in the future is to live a good life. After all, if she is still here, I hope that I can continue to walk happily."

His eyes looked so firm and indifferent, but Wang Huyi and Li Wei had nothing to say. They only felt that Mo Fanfan in front of them was completely like a stranger to them. He was using a hard shell to hold him tightly. Wrapping his body riddled with holes, he tried to make people around him not to sympathize with him, not to pity him, but it was precisely this pretending to be strong that showed his most hurt and most difficult side to the fullest.

The air seemed to condense in an instant, there was no sound, and Li Wei, who talked the most on weekdays, had nothing to say. No matter how he grew up, he was still a child of fifteen or sixteen years old. The matter of life and death was still too far away from them, too far away. The past is out of reach, even if the reality is presented in front of them like blood, they are young and have no choice but to panic.

Qi Yunze wanted to take another puff of the cigarette, but when the butt of the cigarette was brought to his mouth, he realized that the burnt cigarette butt had already touched his skin, and the burning tingling had belatedly touched his brain nerves , Qi Yunze threw the cigarette butt to the ground with a flick of his hand, and stomped on it fiercely.

"Come with me." The smoked voice was a bit hoarse, but it did not affect the unquestionable tone in Qi Yunze's tone. He took Mo Fanfan's arm and strode a few steps away from the dim light under the street lights, leaving only Li Wei and Wang Huyi looked at each other in blank dismay.

The night enveloped the two of them in darkness, leaving only two paper silhouettes in the light.In the dark corner without street lights, Qi Yunze could see Mo Pingfan's face clearly only when the moonlight was falling, and he had been thinking about this face for several days, but when facing him, Qi Yunze was full of words, I can't even say anything.

"Did you eat well these two days?" After a long silence, Yun Ze bit his lips, resenting his own incompetence.

"Hmm..." Pingfan kept his head down, and when he heard Yunze's question, he just hummed lightly.

"..." There was another long period of silence, embarrassing, and entangled between the two of them. The two of them were so ordinary with headaches that they couldn't hold on anymore.

"What do you want from me?"

"Are you going back to City S?" The two people who spoke at the same time looked at each other for a second, but then moved away.

Mo Fanfan suddenly felt a little funny. He looked up at Qi Yunze in the dark, and saw that he was not daring to look at him with his head turned away. He suddenly felt extremely disappointed in his heart. Under his seemingly strong physique, he was indecisive. , A cowardly heart that dare not speak out, dared to kiss herself in her room that day, but at this moment she did not dare to keep herself, and even did not dare to look at herself again.When Yunze pulled him away just now, there was a throbbing in the depths of Pingfan's heart. The idea that he would keep him came out of the ground, which made Pingfang's heart look forward to it. Such a silence, such a word.

"Of course I'm leaving. Is there anything else in Z City that I can miss?" Pingfan looked straight at Yunze. He knew that Qi Yunze knew that he was staring at him. It's like finding a breakthrough, wanting to vent, wanting to listen to Qi Yunze, wanting him to respond, what is behind that forbidden kiss!

But to his disappointment, Qi Yunze never answered, he even avoided his eyes, not daring to look directly at him.Pingfan was disappointed to the extreme, but he smiled coldly. In desperation, he understood that this kind of taboo can be broken no matter how you say it. If you say it is broken, you are still a friend. If you say it is broken, it can be nothing.Mo Fanfan turned around and wanted to leave, but those familiar hands held him, warm and unquestionable: "Am I worth remembering for you?"

"..." After being dazed for a long time, Mo Fanfan didn't look back: "The three of you are my good friends, and I will always remember you."

The hands that grabbed him tightened tightly. Just when Mo Fanfan was about to withdraw his hands and leave, the person behind him pushed his back against the dilapidated street corner with a stronger body than himself. On the stone wall, when his back hit the stone wall, his stomach ached from the shock. He hadn't eaten well for a few days, and he felt a bloody smell rushing up from his stomach and up his throat, just when he was about to reach the tip of his tongue. , but was squeezed out by the smell of cigarettes, Mo Pingfan opened his eyes wide, looking at the person in front of him who was kissing him affectionately and closed his eyes, the familiar tongue was not as jerky as it was the first time. Wrapped around his tongue, teasing, sucking, and entangled, as if after this kiss was over, he, Mo Fanfan, would disappear without a trace.

When he was about to lose his breath, Yunze still stopped his kiss, pressing against Fanfan's forehead, Yunze held Fanfan's face in his hands, the sound of breathing was too close, every time he breathed out, they were intertwined, Fanfan couldn't help it She wrapped her arms around Qi Yunze's waist, just looked into his eyes, and suddenly felt that maybe life is not so difficult.

"I like you, I don't know why, I just like you, I know, we are all boys, we shouldn't be like this, but I just can't control myself, do you know, for a long, long time, I have been I think about you all the time, I didn’t know why before, but now, I know, I like you, I want to be with you, I want to watch you every day, ordinary, don’t go, okay?” The young man of the world, the confession with swelling blood, at this moment, Qi Yunze summoned up all his courage, he has long given up thinking about reality, he has long given up thinking about life, he just wants to express all the feelings that have been suppressed in his heart for too long, Tell that person.

But that person is far more rational than Qi Yunze.

Hearing Qi Yunze's confession, Mo Fanfan, who should have responded excitedly, did not have the sense of happiness he imagined. The love words he was looking forward to, originally he thought he would be as desperate as Qi Yunze. At the lowest point of his life, he simply ignored all willfulness Once, but after all, he is the Mo Pingfan who was hurt by rumors since he was a child. Words can kill people. This is the truth that Mo Pingfan realized when he was the youngest. The soul-lock chain has been entangled in the deepest part of Mo Pingfan's heart. He raised his head and looked deeply at Yunze. After all, they are only fifteen or sixteen-year-old children. What should I do, should Qi Yunze be made to endure the pain of being talked about by others and being poked in the back by others like himself when he was a child? !

No matter how much Mo Pingfan wanted to be willful, he still couldn't do this.

"With your words, I am enough...I have the same thoughts as you, you should know..." Slowly hugging Yunze, Pingfan gently leaned his head on his shoulder. "But, we can't be so willful, can we? What will we do in the future? How should you face your parents? How can I continue to live here?"

"But!" Yunze was a little anxious

"Don't worry." Pingfan gently stroked Yunze's back. "Promise me, after I leave, you study hard and get admitted to the school you want to go to. Our grades are similar, and we may be able to go to a university in the future. At that time, we will meet again."

"Really?"

"..." Pingfan held back his tears and suppressed his voice: "Really, I won't lie to you."

"Then... I will call you every day."

"……it is good"

Pingfan replied, comforting Yunze, saying this, but he made another plan in his heart. After this night, Qi Yunze will never see him again. This forbidden love can end here Yes, he has already endured too many rumors from the world, and he doesn't want the person he loves to suffer from the rumors like him. He would rather, after tonight, he can forget about himself, marry a wife and have children, and live his childhood I just envy the life - such a normal family. As for the ordinary himself, his life has long been far from normal. What happens in the future, he can only live with the situation...

The silhouettes under the street lamps are tightly intertwined. Once we leave, we will never see each other for the first time in life.