midsummer restlessness

2006, 8.20.

It was the coldest morning in Chongqing in Xia An's memory.

Xia Lincheng, who was diagnosed with lung cancer a few months ago, did not survive the six-month period prescribed by the doctor. After a night of intense pain, before dawn, he fell asleep forever and never woke up again.

He didn't leave a word, just threw them a lot of empty and long dark time.

Crying bitterly all night, through heart-piercing despair, Xia An followed behind her mother, staring blankly at the empty and unfamiliar room.

Li Ranru stepped forward and silently began to pack up the relics, folded them neatly and packed them in boxes.

Xia An stood motionless on the spot, like a lifeless puppet, with an expressionless face and dim eyes.

"Xiao An, go back to the room early to rest. There are still many things to be busy tomorrow morning"

Li Ranru's voice was hoarse from crying all night.

Xia An looked up at her indifferently, pursed her lips, not obediently as usual.

"Is what Auntie said true?"

Suddenly, she asked slowly in a deep voice.

Li Ranru froze for a while, and continued the movement in his hands for a long while without raising his head. "You don't need to worry about adults' affairs, children, go back to the house quickly."

"Is what Auntie said true?"

Xia An suppressed the trembling in his throat and repeated it again.

Li Ranru lowered her head, her disheveled hair covered her eyes so she couldn't see her expression clearly.

After being silent for a while, she lowered her hands, smoothed the hair around her ears, looked up at Xia An, opened her mouth as if she wanted to explain something, but she didn't make a sound after a while.

"Is it that difficult to answer?" Xia An looked at her, eyes full of doubts, expectations, pleading, tears accumulated in the eye sockets ready to come out.

"Just say no! It's all her deception, it's not true."

Li Ranru remained silent, Xia An opened his eyes unconfidently, and asked tentatively, "This is not true, is it?"

But the mother did not give the answer to her prayer.

She moved her throat slowly, her voice was dry and scary when she spoke, as if she had exhausted all her strength to speak a complete sentence.

"not real."

"Just like you heard, we're going to emigrate to Melbourne when you finish high school—"

"You are dreaming!"

Xia An was suddenly emotional, staring at her and shouting, "I won't go there even if I die!"

Xia An choked with sobs, pointed at the portrait on the wall with trembling fingers, "How long has it been since Dad passed away? You can't wait to marry that disgusting foreigner. Is your heart made of stone?"

"You've been looking forward to this day for a long time! You can't wait for him to die soon!"

"Snapped!"

A slap hit her face, Li Ranru stared at her, her bloodshot eyes were frighteningly red.

"Xia An!" She roared, her pale lips trembling uncontrollably, only huge teardrops fell down, and she couldn't say a word.

"Heh. I hit the mark, right?"

Xia An covered her face, looked up at her with red eye circles, and sneered.

Li Ranru turned her head in pain, and slowly stretched out her hand, trying to pull her, "Xiao An, listen to what mother said——"

He waved away the hand that touched the shirt, "Don't touch me!"

Li Ranru was stunned, her hands stiffened in mid-air, not knowing where to land them.

Resolutely walking to the door, Xia An looked back at the ashen-faced Li Ranru, gritted his teeth, "You really make me sick."

Then ran out and never looked back.

The sky was getting darker and darker, and the thick cloud cover was very low. With a few thunderclaps and lightning, the rain fell down with a crackling sound.

Xia An ran wildly on the street, her face was wet, she wiped her face vigorously, but her vision became more blurred.

She ran to the telephone booth on the opposite side of the street, opened the door and jumped in, tremblingly put in a few coins, clumsily pressed the number that had been dialed hundreds of times with her white fingers, and a cold and long prompt sound came from the receiver. Biting his lips tightly to prevent himself from moaning, he clutched the receiver tightly with both hands.

Answer the phone... Please, answer the phone, please...

The rain became more and more violent, hitting the glass of the phone booth with thunder, a burst of thunder roared, and the phone was connected with a beep.

"Hey."

A warm voice came clearly from the receiver.

"Xiao Kai..." After calling out his name, all the accumulated grievances flooded up, Xia An's nose turned sour, and tears burst out of his eyes instantly.

"...Cheyenne?...Is that you?"

asked hesitantly.

She choked up and nodded vigorously, unable to say a word, just nestled in the phone booth with the receiver in her arms, crying hysterically.

Wang Junkai grabbed his coat and umbrella and rushed out of the house, running wildly all the way.

According to her speechless description on the phone, she finally saw Xia An in the red closed telephone booth at the corner of the street not far away.

It was very late at night, and there was no one on the road.

Wang Junkai stopped and looked at her across the street. Xia An hugged her shoulders and curled up to one side, her legs were bent and her head was deeply buried in it. Her long wet hair was stuck to her back, like a wounded child. Help, suddenly felt sour in my heart.

The person opposite seemed to sense his presence too, she slowly raised her head, looked straight at him, watched him quicken his pace, walk towards her in the heavy rain, step by step into her ruined life.

Wang Junkai held an umbrella and opened the door.

In the small phone booth, the air was filled with a warm and humid smell, and it was as peaceful as another world.

"Xia An."

he called her.

The girl raised her head bluntly, looking at him with eyes that were out of focus and frighteningly empty.

Wang Junkai suddenly became scared.

He knelt down and reached out to hug her, patting her back in bewilderment.

Her thin body was cold, and she slowly shrank into his arms, lying on his shoulders.

After a long time, she suddenly called his name.

"Xiao Kai..."

"I don't have a father anymore."

She said softly, her voice trembling and hoarse.

The warm yellow light on the top gave her hair a layer of fluffy light, and Wang Junkai felt a sudden sore heart when she looked at it.

He tightened his arms and rested his chin on the top of her soft hair, but he didn't know how to comfort her.

He thought for a while, looked down at her and said seriously, "You still have me."

Then, as if confirming something, he added.

"I won't leave you."

The umbrella standing next to it quickly flowed out the rainwater and meandered on the ground.

The downpour surrounded the small phone booth, creating a separate space.

The boy hugged the trembling girl, kissed her cheek, and murmured something.

The sound was very low, and it was almost inaudible mixed with the sound of the rain outside.

He said, "You still have me. I won't leave you."

Xia An sat up abruptly, her forehead was soaked with sweat.

He raised his hand to check the time, and the phone showed 2:[-] in the morning.

The night outside the window was as black as ink.

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