almost lonely

He said: "Why isn't Chenchen awake?" He said: "Juelan, I miss him so much." He said: "Does he want me anymore?" He said: "Chenchen doesn't want me anymore."

Ning Juechen seemed to be watching a funny play with the wrong script, it was so funny but he couldn't laugh at all.He stood expressionlessly, saw Xu Ye's tears seep into his fingers, and thought dumbly: What is Xu Ye acting in?

In fact, Xu Ye went to Lian City last night, and rushed back in the morning without stopping, and just arrived in Jingcheng in the afternoon.It was already the seventh day after the car accident, and Lu Juelan's condition had stabilized a lot. The doctor said that he would wake up soon, but Ning Juechen showed no sign of improvement at all.

Xu Ye stayed at the hospital day and night, which reminded him of the days when his grandma was first hospitalized several years ago.At that time, he didn't know how to face Ning Juechen, and he broke up with Lu Juelan because of the recording. He stayed with him in the hospital all day long, and one day he couldn't hold it anymore. made a phone call.

It took a long time to connect, and the voice over there was obviously suppressed: "I'm in a meeting, I'll get back to you later." Xu Ye took a deep breath, and the hand holding the phone was trembling: "Mom..."

"Is it because you don't have enough money? I'll have someone call you." "Mom! Grandma is like this and you still haven't come back?!" "Children, I told you that the project at hand is very important to the company. Dad has paid a lot to get this opportunity, and we really can't get away these few days. When the work here is over...Hello? Kid?"

Xu Ye hung up the phone without saying a word, his calf was completely numb, like a needle prick, after a while he wiped his face and stood up staggeringly, almost stepped on the ground when he went downstairs.

Watching over Ning Juechen for the past few days, he seemed to be 17 again. The heartbreaking pain was like a huge net, densely packed and caged down, making every minute and every second feel desperately long .

Compared with Lu Juelan, Ning Juechen's place is much more deserted, only Chen Yuhong would come over sometimes, Xu Ye and her were relatively silent, sitting in the corridor in silence.

The same flesh and blood, Chen Yuhong's bowl of water has never been leveled for so many years, she has spent much more time and thought with her eldest son than with her younger son, obviously Lu Juelan already has Lu Chengxiong with a fiancée, 24 I have never broken a person when I was young, and there is no one who is not taking care of me with all my heart.

Xu Ye felt an indescribable annoyance in his heart, and felt that how could he have the face to criticize Chen Yuhong?He said that the bowl of water was not level, how much space did he give Ning Juechen in the bowl in his heart?If you want to say sorry to Ning Juechen, he is No.1.

He left in a hurry that day, thinking he would only stay in Jingcheng for one night at most, so he went back. Seeing that a week had passed, Xu Ye had to find a free time to go back to the company to explain his work.He bought a red-eye flight on Sunday, and left the hospital reluctantly when he couldn't make it after ten o'clock in the evening.

It was the rainy season in Jingcheng, and it had been falling for several weeks. The raindrops were not heavy but very dense. Xu Yi didn't hold an umbrella, and his shoulders were wet when he stopped the car by the roadside for a while.The light blue shirt he was wearing was bought by Ning Juechen. It was the same as the one he wore on the day of the accident. The neckline was already a bit dirty after so many days, and the sleeves were also wrinkled.Xu Ye was not willing to change it, and it was ridiculous to hold on to such a weak connection as thin as a spider's thread and dare not let go.

The radio station in the car is broadcasting a movie program, this episode is about the 2012 movie "Search" by Chen Kaige, Chen Ruoxi asked Yang Shoucheng when he fell in love with Ye Lanqiu, Yang Shoucheng said: "When I know I will never see you again When it comes to her.The male host was very emotional when he said this line, and the deep pain and suffering were suppressed under the calm voice.

The driver called him several times before Xu Ye came back to his senses. The car stopped at the intersection ahead and waited for the red light. The driver turned his head and asked again with concern: "Are you all right, young man?" Xu Ye felt his face was wet and cold Yes, I raised my hand to touch it only to realize that I was crying.

He forced a smile, shook his head at the driver, but the tears that he had endured for so many days flowed even more fiercely, and he couldn't stop at all.The lies that have been comforting me for a week have all been shattered by the phrase "I will never see you again", and the fear that has been suppressed in my heart is protruding out, Xu Ye seems to have changed back to the original one in an instant. A helpless weak boy.

Probably because his expression was so ugly, the master was thinking of ways to comfort him along the way, and said several times clumsily: "Don't cry, young man! Your patients know that you are so sad, and they must be reluctant to part with it. Get well tomorrow. Already!"

But he doesn't know.I treated him so badly, so badly, why should a person like me make him reluctant.

It was also raining in Lian City. After getting off the plane and taking a taxi back to the apartment, it was past two o'clock. When Xu Ye arrived at the door, he found that he didn't have a key with him. The person who obediently waited for him at home every day would not open the door for him today.Xu Ye turned around and went downstairs to the company to get the keys. The apartment was very close to his company, but far away from Ning Juechen's work place.

——This position was chosen by Ning Juechen, he didn't tell Xu Ye that he was afraid that Xu Ye would not go there because he was too far away.

The house is usually kept very clean, and there is a little dust in it when no one lives in it for a week.Xu Ye opened the shoe cabinet only to find that he had changed into autumn cotton slippers. The last few times he came here was because of desire. He drove straight in almost as soon as he entered the door, and didn't even bother to change his shoes.

The room was very quiet, with no people at all. The windows were obviously closed, but it always seemed that there was wind coming in from all directions.The half-wet shirt clung tightly to his body, making him shiver with cold.Xu Ye walked through the empty living room and slowly opened the bedroom door.

In the past, there was no desk in the bedroom, but because Xu Ye didn't come here often, Ning Juechen moved his small desk here.Apart from his job as a clerk, Ning Juechen usually writes for magazines, and there is a shelf full of samples.Xu Ye knew about it but never cared about it. He took out a book and saw that the title was "Pompeii".

There was a medical record under the mouse pad, Xu Ye took it out and turned to the latest page, and there was a gastroscope checklist inside, which was half a month ago.The term gastroscopy seems to have become a taboo between them, let alone asking him to accompany them, Ning Juechen dare not mention these two words in front of him at all.

Xu Ye remembered that he had come here once in those few days, and Ning Juechen kept pushing that he was rushing to finish the manuscript, Xu Ye was quickly put off by him and left.It turned out that Ning Juechen was sick at that time but he dared not tell.

There were several sets of autumn clothes of the same style in the closet. Xu Yi took them out and stuffed them into the suitcase, and found a storage box hidden underneath.Inside, Xu Ye found the school uniform he gave Ning Juechen, the book "Snow Country", the pair of black Nike wristbands, and many other strange things that he didn't remember at all.

There are some movie tickets in the notebook. The last two are a literary film from last month, and the ticket stubs have not been torn off.That day after Ning Juechen gave Xu Ye a hard blowjob, he carefully and flatteringly asked if he could accompany him to see it. Xu Ye nodded and agreed, but he forgot all about it when he woke up the next day.The first two tickets were also attached to the ticket stubs. The original words on the thermal paper had disappeared. Ning Juechen retrace it with a black pen. The time was the first semester of the second year of high school. Xu Ye thought about it for a long time but did not recall what happened. .

Really, among those who are sorry for Ning Juechen, he is No.1.

Xu Ye lay down on Ning Juechen's usual sleeping side. He had slept very little these past few days. When he closed his eyes, his dream was full of car accidents. Later, he didn't dare to sleep anymore. He only squinted for a while when he was really sleepy.

This night's dream was finally not a car accident, he dreamed that Ning Juechen was squatting by the closet and quietly collecting things.Xu Ye called him tremblingly: "Chenchen?" Ning Juechen turned around, his body was covered in blood, and his light blue shirt was dyed purple.He stood up holding the storage box, his face was pale, and his eyes were crooked when he smiled.He said, "Brother Yi, goodbye."

18 Dawn is Stranger Than Love

Ning Juechen only visited the ICU once, the day after he woke up.To be precise, it was the day after he woke up in Lu Juelan's body.

Family members visit time is from 04:30 to [-]:[-] pm every day, no more than two family members at a time.Ning Juechen walked over from his ward, his footsteps were as heavy as lead, and every time he took a step forward, he felt the urge to take ten steps back.

The corridor was full of worried and haggard family members of the patients. They gathered together in groups of three or four and whispered. Some of them couldn't hold back their tears for a while, and immediately someone surrounded them to comfort them softly. As he spoke, he also sobbed.

Ning Juechen only felt that he was about to be completely crushed by this heavy and oppressive atmosphere. His body seemed to weigh a thousand catties, and he was almost unable to support it. His feet were so weak and weak that he couldn't even run away.He hurriedly took two steps back in a trance, and accidentally bumped into a person.Ning Juechen looked back, it was Xu Ye.Xu Ye looked even worse than last night, he hadn't slept well for a few days, and his whole body was like an empty shell whose soul had been ripped out.

The two said at the same time: "You...?" Then they fell silent again.When the time was almost up, Xu Ye patted Ning Juechen on the shoulder: "You go first." Ning Juechen also asked what he had just stopped: "Why are you here?" Here you go, wash your hands."

Ning Juechen squeezed a lot of disinfectant into the palm of his hand, and rubbed his hands together unconsciously. This body is so strange that even a fingernail does not belong to him.Both hands were rubbed red and he finally came back to his senses, stiff