waiting for the flowers to bloom

They hadn't seen each other for a long time after that day, except that Sui Dong drank too much and said those things that day, and somehow didn't mention them again later, which made Song Fanfan feel a little relieved.

It didn't take long for school to start. Song Fanfan came to school with a heavier heart than those who went to the grave. He was a sophomore.

"I am born to be useful." Li Bai's words have probably fooled many people since ancient times. Of course, Song Fanfan is no exception. He even took this sentence as his motto when he was ridiculously young, and once believed it. The only thing you want is yourself, you are not only useful, but also a great talent.

One year of college is enough for Song Fanfan to distinguish between reality and fantasy, and the two-month summer vacation did not cheer him up much. He still has no goals, no ideals, and no motivation to work hard.However, this year's courses are more and more difficult, but Song Fanfan started out with depression, destined to become more and more difficult, confused and helpless in the following days.He felt like he was building a road, with no starting point in sight and no direction.

After school started, Sui Dong called several times, saying that the driving school had arranged for the third exam, and asked Song Fanfan when he would have time to take him to practice driving.

But during that whole period of time, he really didn't have this thought, he was not busy, not at all.Except for the six or seven hours of sleeping, the rest of the time is spent with his mobile phone and computer to accompany him day after day.

Song Fanfan never dared to imagine that a person like himself would skip classes, fail exams, and try his best to cheat in the exam room, but this is his daily routine now.

And he seems to have gotten used to it, and he doesn't care. This is Song Fanfan seen by his roommates and classmates.But... How many times did he want to smash his mobile phone, tear up all the books, and have the power to destroy everything... It's terrible, Song Fanfan is afraid of himself who has such thoughts, he just has no expectations for the future It's just hope, but it's just becoming lazy, stupid, a little distorted, and I don't like myself anymore.

The passage of time made Song Fanfan feel oppressed. He tried to comfort himself that there was still a lot of time, but the effect was reversed.The decline submerged him like a tsunami, but he decided to give up struggling and just drift along the sea. He could only use the life jacket in college for four years. After that, he could meet a cruise ship or a plank, or nothing. Willing to make any effort.

As for Sui Dong, this glorious image in Song Fanfan's heart was quietly buried in his heart.Song Fanfan didn't dare to touch the episode of the summer vacation.After the shock, there was a trace of ridiculous satisfaction. On the one hand, he maintained the most normal friendship with Sui Dong, on the other hand, he hoped that Sui Dong would stay by his side forever, and even feared that Sui Dong was just joking. When he didn't want to deal with him anymore, he immediately disappeared without a trace.

If one wants to analyze the development of the relationship between Sui Dong and Song Fanfan, it must be staged and stepped.At the lowest point of Song Fanfan's life, Sui Dong stood beside him.He has changed from a friend to an incredible suitor. Song Fanfan knows that the whole situation is becoming more and more weird, but he can't resist the temptation and is immersed in Sui Dong's fascination bit by bit.So, when Sui Dong touched his heart for the first time, something changed gradually.

Sui Dong felt that he seemed to understand, but he didn't seem to understand.What Song Fanfan was worried about, what he was worried about, what he was confused about, he had never felt, nor had he ever thought about it.What are people born for?Save and why?

The vast majority of people in this world have to run around to support their families, but some are chasing fame and fortune, and some just want to pursue happiness. No matter what, there is always a purpose.Whether it is Sui Dong or Song Fanfan, they also want to support their families. Maybe this is the purpose?Why do I always feel like something is missing?

"Probably because I'm too greedy. I also want to be happy and stable, but also want to live freely, and also want to find the meaning and value of life." Song Fanfan said slowly.

Sui Dong contemplated for the first time in his life, and then organized his own words: "Song Fanfan, I dare not say that I know you very well, but I like you, thank you for still being willing to tell me this," he paused After a pause, "I've always acted immediately when I have an idea, and basically I haven't been entangled in anything. But I think that as long as I live, there should be nothing that I can't overcome. You may think that I am a young man. I am qualified to say this. Indeed, two years ago, I was just relying on my family’s wealth and ignorance, but after I went to the army, I found that my life was meaningless. What I insisted on was seen by others as a A joke. At that time, I spent a long time thinking about what I came to the army for. At that time, I just enlisted because I didn’t want to see anyone, but after a long time, I was thinking about this. What can I do? I have to go back after a year, because I don't know what I can do in the army. But then I figured it out a little bit, man... You must spend your life in the way you like, otherwise there is no life What do you mean? Although so far, I have been living a terrible life, and I haven’t found what I like to do. Although I am also in the company now, I know that I don’t have the ability of my brother, and I can’t say that I like it. It’s true Don't know what else to do."

When Sui Dong said this, he suddenly turned his head and looked at Song Fanfan: "But... on this matter, we can work together. No matter what you think, I will stand by your side and support you all the time. So, if you want , I can...well...we can work together...with you."

He was a little poor at words, and he didn't know if he had expressed his thoughts clearly. It was the first time he wanted to express himself so euphemistically when he wanted to be nice to someone.

Although Sui Dong expressed ambiguity, Song Fanfan could hear the meaning of his words, but he didn't know how to answer.Sui Dong is a unique and contradictory existence in his heart, but he thinks it should not be Sui Dong's so-called "like", but more gratitude and touch.

"Thank you……"

"Don't be too embarrassing, I just want to say that no matter what happens in the future, I will cover you!" Sui Dong smiled lightly, more serious than usual, and even more touching.

These words were too domineering, Song Fanfan felt his heart beating a little faster in a trance, and didn't know how to respond.

They chatted a lot that day, and Sui Dong realized that he had truly met Song Fanfan. This is a confused person, yearning for freedom and ease but unable to let go of the heavy burden, a person who lives in a very tangled life.But when you get along with him, you will feel that this is an extremely indifferent person, or he tries hard to make himself very indifferent.

Like a clear spring breeze blowing into his chest, at a certain moment Sui Dong suddenly felt a faint beauty, not sweet, not fragrant, just a feeling, this is good, this is good.

Obviously, he has seen all kinds of romantic places, but he didn't expect to have the idea of ​​staying here with Song Fanfan.In fact, Song Fanfan has a good impression of himself, but how to ferment this good feeling?

Sui Dong has never been in love, and neither has Song Fanfan.

Sui Dong silently liked someone in his heart, but Song Fanfan did not.

Sui Dong also walked through thousands of flowers without touching any leaves, but Song Fanfan did not.

This is not a battle, but there are winners and losers.Sui Dongtai knew how to make a person fall in love, Song Fanfan almost became an accident, but he still found a breakthrough by himself.If what makes Song Fanfan confused is the future, then he can just accompany Song Fanfan to move forward together.

Probably Sui Dong never felt that he was making a promise for someone, because his ultimate goal was still to want Song Fanfan, but this person was too difficult to deal with, stubborn and not enlightened, he needed to spend more effort to conquer his heart little by little. land.Perhaps in many later times, Sui Dong felt that he did not do anything worth mentioning, but it was for that evil purpose.

But in most cases, people will ignore the influence of "subtle influence". No matter what the purpose is, in the long-term process, people's consciousness, emotion and thought will definitely produce wonderful reactions and results. , but the sensitivity of each person to this influence is greatly different.

For example, Song Fanfan is very sensitive to this kind of influence, otherwise no matter what Sui Dong does, he will not be able to wait for the day when Song Fanfan nods and agrees; while Sui Dong is the kind with extremely low sensitivity, he hardly cares about it. Will examine how his heart and emotions have changed, unless there is one thing that enlightens him.

Specifically speaking, Sui Dong didn't do anything big to shake the world and weep the ghosts and gods, but he kept a lot of thought in his daily life, and in his unconscious state, he invaded Song Fanfan's heart little by little.

But even Song Fanfan himself didn't know his goal. Of course, it was impossible for Sui Dong to know. He didn't know how to read minds, and he didn't have the ability to be a light in the dark. He was just an ordinary person.

But how many extraordinary people are there in this world?How many truly great men have appeared in the long river of history throughout the ages?Those great men who are worshiped by people have undeniable significance, but after all, this world is created by trillions of ordinary people, and ordinary people can certainly do extraordinary things.Sui Dong, an ordinary person, inadvertently led Song Fanfan through the fog and out of the confused predicament.

Song Fanfan is first of all grateful, which is one of the most basic human emotions.Maybe even without Sui Dong, one day in the future, he would get out of the predicament with the growth of his mind, but the price is time, this is a judgment with no date.

Sui Dong's appearance was too sudden and too coincidental, and things became more and more unpredictable. Song Fanfan hoped that he could do something to express his gratitude, but found that nothing was enough to express his feelings.From his initial defensiveness and curiosity towards Sui Dong, he has completely transformed into trust and dependence. Before that, for a long, long time, he made up his mind not to trust anyone other than his family.

Sui Dong must be his best friend in this life, no, not just a friend, a friend is completely incompatible with the relationship between them, it should be a noble person, right?Song Fanfan thought about it, but he always felt more alienated. That's not it, is it a confidant?Sui Dong always understood himself, but probably he didn't want to be a confidant...

Thinking of this, Song Fanfan suddenly became nervous. I'm not disgusted, I'm just curious... If it's him... Maybe it's nothing...