Occultist

This is probably the first occult theory class in the history of the world.

Because of the existence of special esoteric rules, there is very little direct information flow among occultists.

In the past, because of Yiying, the country established a secret art database to keep the known secrets, but the authority of the database is strictly controlled, and only the harmless parts that Yiying has confirmed will be released to all organized mystics. public.

Of course, apart from the well-known "First Theorem of Mysticism", in fact, mystics have quite different understandings of this law.

Through the unified evaluation of mystics, the Secret Service was able to select a group of qualified ones and join the establishment; and the remaining unqualified folk mystics, some of them went to prison for the crimes they committed, and some of them were eliminated. After losing their memories, they returned to their daily lives, and a very small number of them went to the secret arts research institute controlled for life...

After entering that kind of place, it is basically impossible to come out, and a considerable number of people served in it to death.First-level agents like Fei Lian will go in after confirming their retirement.

There are a total of more than 100 national occultists in the program this year, except for a few who are on missions or who are really unable to be present, almost all of them are sitting in the classroom.

This classroom is also completely different from any other classrooms in the world. It is independently closed, and there are baffles between each seat. These baffles can be transparent, semi-transparent or completely impervious.

And on the podium, there is also a holographic projector, and the lecturer—Comrade Yiying will choose the picture.

Before the start of the class, there was no whispering. Most of the mystics were quite patient, even though more than ten minutes had passed since the agreed time.

Suddenly, an electronic sound came from the middle of the classroom: "surprise!"

Everyone was startled and looked sideways.

There was a brown cane lying horizontally on a seat in the middle, and a small loudspeaker was tied to the head of the cane, and the sound came from here.Probably after some processing, the timbre has been distorted.

—a crutch?

The crutch "opened" again: "That green dress over there, yes, it's you. Come, help me to sit on the podium!"

The man in the green vest stood up in confusion, walked over and looked around, but did not see the lecturer himself.

The crutch immediately said: "What are you looking at! It's you!"

The green vest was full of question marks, and looked at the monitor hanging at the back of the classroom, as if he wanted to see where Yiying himself was through the camera.

The crutch scolded: "Look down, look at my body, and help me onto the podium! Such a simple thing can't be done, why don't you just jump out of the window, so as to keep the average IQ in the whole classroom?"

The green vest was sprayed with blood, so he had to raise his crutches with both hands, "please" to the front podium, and helped it to be straightened by the loudspeaker by the way.

Then, the crutches cleared their throats and said, "Hello, classmates!"

The whole classroom: "..."

Most afraid of the air suddenly quiet.

Crutches sighed and said, "You people really don't know how to respect teachers, you don't even have the most basic cup of tea."

Pop, the projector was turned on, and some people's headshots began to be played in a loop.

The crutch said perfunctorily: "Okay, the first lesson starts, you watch these people for me."

Everyone recruited one after another and carefully looked at the portraits of the cycle.

One sheet was changed every three seconds, and it took about 2 minutes for the change to end, so there were nearly forty people in total.Most of these people are Caucasian, and there are a few black and yellow people. They are not very special in appearance alone.

Among the mystics, those with extraordinary talents may memorize seven or eight after two rounds.

At this time, the crutch said again: "Okay, close your eyes, and imagine that these people are all dead. I will give you 10 minutes to ask questions, another 10 minutes to discuss, and finally tell me all the information about the murderer. The higher the overall score."

Wow, there was a little commotion in the audience.

This pace is a bit too fast, and no one expected Mr. Yi to come up with a question to test everyone.

Fortunately, all the elites in the audience were chosen from thousands of people, and some raised their hands in no time.

The crutch said: "The one with the white silk scarf, tell me."

The white silk scarf asked: "Excuse me, what is the cause of death of these people?"

Crutches said: "There are too many. Some people suffocated to death in their own bathrooms, some fell into the lake and drowned, some were poisoned to death after eating poisonous things, and some jumped to death. However, the preliminary investigation It was suspected to be suicide."

The white silk scarf asked again: "Then what are the identities of these people?"

The crutch said: "Seeing that you look good, this question is for free, and the next question needs to be asked by a different person-these people have many industries, some are salesmen, some are stars, some sweep everyone, some open shops, some The ones are still students."

Wow, there was another sound from below.

Because this answer is almost as good as no, and does not contain any useful information.

The previous green vest raised his hand and asked, "Excuse me, what do these people have in common?"

"Their biggest and only characteristic is their faith—" The crutches paused for a long time, as if they were deliberating, "Well, let's just pretend that they believe in the Flying Spaghetti God."

There was a discussion in the audience, and suddenly someone shouted: "Sir! Are you alluding to the serial deaths of religious figures that happened last month?"

The crutches exaggerated: "Yes, the Flying Pasta God Cult is also a God Cult. It's really hard work for you to name my example."

A mystic in a suit and leather shoes got up again and asked, "Among these people, which one has the most bizarre cause of death? What is his identity and cause of death?"

The crutch made a long sound of "um", seemed to think for a while, and then said: "It should be the richest man in a Southeast Asian country. The way he died was that he had been on vacation for a month. He should eat and play. Hundreds of women finally called his family doctor to inject him with an overdose of drugs, and then he died peacefully because of the drugs.”

The mystics got a little excited, and someone asked, "Did you investigate this family doctor?"

The crutch said: "Check it out, he is completely innocent. It was the richest man who asked him to inject so much. He didn't think about it at the time, so he did it."

The man said, "How can you be sure that the family doctor is telling the truth?"

Crutches was silent for a while, then said: "We sent a hypnotist there."

The clinker said again: "How can I be sure that he was indeed hypnotized, or that the expert has no problem?"

The crutch said angrily: "Because the person who went was Lao Tzu! What's the problem? If not, please stand on your head in the last row of the classroom for 3 minutes, because you are wasting everyone's time!"

Pfft, small laughter came from all over the classroom.

Niu Jiaojian looked left and right, and ran to the back of the classroom in desperation, and began to think about his mistakes.

At this time, someone said: "Then let's assume that what the family doctor said is true. This shows that the richest man may have committed suicide, and his behavior before his death seems to be a final pleasure. If we investigate his background and recent encounters Is it possible to find the reason for his suicide?"

The crutch said: "I checked, there is no. This person is an oil seller. He is rich like a country. He lives an optimistic and cheerful life. Both of his parents are deceased. Every day is as happy as New Year's Eve. He has absolutely no depression."

At the back of the classroom, Niu Jiaojian asked again: "How can you be sure that he is really happy? Did you take a psychological evaluation before he died?"

"Because I'm pretty close to him," the crutches said slowly, "He's the money that fell from the sky, and I have a treasury behind me. We can buy a Maserati every 10 minutes, and we can buy old and dead, and we can send hundreds of cars to everyone present." No problem, may I ask if you feel good about it?"

Everyone: "..."

Why do I suddenly feel that this crutch has become a little flat.

"I think we have to think about religion." Someone analyzed, "If I remember correctly, what these dead people have in common is that they believed in the same sect. We should first summarize the sect's characteristics and creeds."

Immediately someone said: "I know, the sect—"

Suddenly, the crutches interrupted: "This is the holy Flying Spaghetti Cult! Don't yell!"

The corner of the other party's mouth twitched, but he said kindly: "Well, Fei, Feitian Spaghetti Sect, a sect that has been around for a long time, has been popular since more than ten centuries ago. The believers believe that as long as they believe in their God—that is, Feitian The God of Spaghetti can go to heaven after death, no matter what crimes he committed during his lifetime, as long as he repents and converts before death, he can still go to heaven.”

Everyone looked weird after listening to it, and someone asked, "Which is their classic?"

The people who popularized science said: "It's the ancient...ancient pasta classic."

The crutches couldn't bear it any longer, and laughed unrestrainedly. After electronic processing, it turned into a super weird voice: "Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie Jie!"

Everyone: "..." Didn't you start it, why are you laughing!

The science popularizer himself held back his laughter and said: "This sect has a very small proportion of believers in today's world, and there are not many people who study the scriptures seriously, and there is no recognized pope now. They have their own lines. In the next meeting, I think that as long as everyone closes their eyes and meditates, they can directly communicate with the Flying Spaghetti God, so there is no need for the church and the pope."

Crutches said: "Communist religion, very social. Anyone want to join?"

The mystics looked at each other.

The white silk scarf said suddenly: "Sir, what do you mean, we can send people into this church to find out what they are thinking? Then dig out the real motive of the richest man's suicide?"

"Hmm..." said the crutches, "I found that you are very good in one thing."

The white silk scarf is beautiful.

Crutches added: "People say that big breasts are brainless, so your breasts must be big."

White silk scarf: "..."

The crutches said, "Everyone, please stand up."

Everyone: "?" Although they didn't know why, everyone still stood up collectively.

I heard the crutches continue: "Now bow your head in silence for 30 seconds. Because your colleague Bai Silk Scarf selflessly infiltrated the Flying Pasta Church to find out information, and died gloriously after a few days... just because of being tortured." Let the flowerpot be smashed to death. Okay, let’s start a moment of silence for the martyrs.”

Everyone: "..."