memory hole

sleep!

He heard a sound, very faint.

He lifted the quilt over his head.His eyes swept across the room and fixed on the window. The curtains there were half closed just now, but now they are all open.

Deng Yi was sitting leisurely on the window sill of the bay window, holding a glass of wine that was about to be drunk, a pair of bright eyes that could not be blinded by the night and drunkenness, staring at the clock string on the bed intently.

Deng Yi didn't leave.

Not to mention that he didn't fall asleep because of lack of interest during the long time when he was taking a bath, as Zhong Xian thought.

Zhong Xian's mind was running fast, and he was relieved to make sure that he hadn't shown anything wrong.

Deng Yi jumped down from the window sill, still holding the wine glass in his right hand. He sat on the other side of the bed and hugged the knee of his right leg and stared at the TV. —The police use Skynet to arrest criminals.

Zhong Xian felt that his heart was at peace, and the thorn retreated.That guy has such an effect just a meter away from him.

The effect of the half-bottle of wine he drank suddenly appeared at this moment, and he closed his eyes in a daze.He was sleepy.

When he opened his eyes again, Deng Yi was no longer in sight.The empty glass is on the bedside table.There was the sound of water splashing in the bathroom.

The TV picture shows the police leading a prisoner towards the prison.

Zhong Xian closed his eyes.

Not long after, he smelled a light fragrance.surround him.Warm and peaceful.

"What's the reason for your sadness?" Deng Yi's voice was close to his ears.

"Mao? Who is sad." Zhong Xian didn't open his eyes.

"I thought I could see you cry."

Zhong Xian took a deep breath. "Shall we... chat?"

"We just talked all the time."

The mattress shook, and Deng Yi rolled over on the bed, and should have gone to the other side of the bed.

"Didn't you say you don't like women?" Deng Yi's voice was not far away.

This guy!Zhong Xian cursed secretly in his heart.I regret what I just said.

"What, do you have an idea? It seems that I successfully molested the police investigating me." He said simply.

Deng Yi smiled over there. "Is there anything else you dare not do?"

"Really not." Zhong Xian said. "Talk about anything. Is it okay to help me until I fall asleep?"

"Do you often find someone to chat with you like this?"

"Never. You are the first." Zhong Xian started to find a topic: "Why are you a policeman? Your temperament is not very similar."

"You don't look like a profiteer either." Deng Yi said. "But we are all over. Why don't you analyze why you were sad just now? Do you believe in cause and effect?"

Zhong Xian took a deep breath quietly: "If there is a cause and effect, the Japanese island should have sunk long ago?"

"The so-called karma does not come from the outside, but from the heart. In essence, you are kind. Even if you want to make yourself unkind, you have always lied to yourself and made yourself do anything. But in the end, your kindness It will bite back and punish itself. This is karma."

"Say so much, doesn't it mean 'conscience can't make it up'."

"almost."

"But I haven't done anything that can't be done with my conscience. I've never hurt anyone intentionally."

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Even if retribution, what is the standard of retribution?"

"Oh, too."

"I was not sad just now, but my chest was uncomfortable. This reminds you of using the theory of cause and effect to teach me a lesson. Does your mother know that you are such a mother-in-law!"

Deng Yi didn't say anything more.He stared at the TV, which was playing the prisoner's confession.

Zhong Xian closed his eyes, and opened them again after a while.

"Are you going?"

Deng Yi didn't answer, her eyes were still fixed on the TV.

"Now...are you bored..."

"You think I'll be bored?"

"Stay for my request. And leave you with nothing to do..."

Deng Yi turned his head, with an inexplicable smile in his eyes, "Are you afraid of me leaving?"

Always so straightforward.The clock string seemed to be deflated.

"Don't worry." Deng Yi stretched one hand into the quilt and held Zhong Xian's hand. "I won't be able to leave this way, so sleep peacefully."

That hand is soft.It really doesn't look like a policeman's hand.

But it's outrageous to sleep holding hands like this!Zhong Xian let go first.

"Does it count if you hurt yourself? Will this also be retribution? I understand what you mean-my current problems, all the illnesses, are retribution."

Deng Yi didn't answer.

"Why don't you analyze it?" Zhong Xian said.

Deng Yi said after a while, "I think, in fact, you want to die."

Zhong Xian was stunned.

"There are many ways to die, and most die quickly. You chose a way to die slowly. May I recommend a more comfortable way for you?"

"Are you humorous?"

"I also think I'm quite humorous."

"You are the one who wants to die!"

"That's what you're doing - reducing the life force in your young body."

"I'm probably suffering from these illnesses and feel that life is not interesting, that's all. I just want to sleep now. Can you say something lighthearted?"

"...Okay. I'll serve you and be your sleeping pill."

"I thank you!"

"You're welcome. Tell me what I think of you. You close your eyes and listen. You are so perfect, outstanding, outstanding. Back then..."

"Are you mocking me?"

"I mean it..."

"I don't want to hear this. You don't have to turn a corner and hurt me, I admit I'm a piece of shit."

"Okay. Be self-aware."

"Tell me what criminal psychology thinks of people like me."

"I can't finish talking at that time. Let me tell you about a well-known point of view in psychology—the most fundamental cause of mental illness—everyone should know that 'life is full of hardships', don't think that life should be smooth and easy. Comfortable, life is to solve one trouble after another. As long as we truly understand and accept this point, then we will never worry about the sufferings of life. Trying to escape and not facing troubles will cause all kinds of psychological problems. question……"

Zhong Xian inadvertently held Deng Yi's wrist, and then let go.He closed his eyes, opened them occasionally, and saw Deng Yi resting on his side with his hands on his head.A pair of eyes are half closed.Under the faint light, his face was clean and clear, like white marble.

Zhong Xian quietly grabbed the corner of the sleeve of the person beside him.Fell asleep.

"Everyone has to face all kinds of troubles in life. Life is a process of facing and solving problems..."

This is the correct answer.Zhong Xian thought to himself.This is correct.I'm not alone.Life is full of hardships.

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35

Pear blossoms all over the ground.

On the tree, in the air, there are swaying broken petals, white as feathers.

Zhong Xian has never seen pear blossoms.

Pears are rarely eaten.

He even kept thinking that the pear blossoms might be pale pink.

But in his dream, the petals are as uniform as snowflakes falling all over the world.

No one told him it was pear blossom, he just knew it.

He was driving a new car with a spacious cabin and excellent visibility.The sound of the engine is soft as if nothing.The wheels run over the petals.Walk through a quiet street.

He still knew it was a dream.He was going to see that man again.

——It seems to be still Deng Yi, with the appearance of a teenager, with a slimmer figure.Sitting quietly on the back seat of the car, that face is not much different from now.

Bell turned the steering wheel slowly and looked in the rearview mirror.The young Deng Yi kept his eyelids lowered, staring at a notebook in his hand.

Zhong Xian turned back slowly.

"what is that?"

He didn't expect to hear an answer.In his dreams, he never heard the guy speak.

The sound seemed to come from outer space.Still with unabated childishness.

"I can't compose your song well."

"Compose... arrange music?"

"Maybe, I can't be your guitar player."

Suddenly, drums sounded, playing an extremely fast rhythm.The sound is getting louder.Gradually deafening.

Zhong Xian woke up.

The hotel room reverberated with a loud and rapid thud, like a drum beating.Someone was knocking hard on the door.

It was bright outside the window, and he was the only one in the room.He got up from the bed.It was as if Deng Yi had never existed last night, only the worn bathrobe was still on the bed, proving that he was indeed here.Zhong Xian was still holding on to the sleeve of Deng Yi's bathrobe, but the person inside disappeared like a snake with its skin peeled off.

It turned out that it was Dake who knocked on the door, looking extremely embarrassed.He was wearing the hotel's white bathrobe, holding a bunch of things in his hands - his coat and backpack from last night.

As soon as Zhong Xian opened the door, Dake rushed in.Throw clothes and bags in the closet next to the door.I took a look at the bed, lifted the quilt to check, and made sure that there was no one in the quilt, so I fell down and fell asleep.

"Fleeing from famine?" Zhong Xianli stood at the door watching this.

"You were alone last night?" Dake asked while hugging the pillow.

Bell closed the door.I went to the bedside table and checked the time on the watch, it was eight in the morning. "You didn't sleep all night?"

Dake grinned, as if smiling, but it was uglier than crying. "I don't have the energy anymore. I just had a cannonball. I don't know why and fell asleep. Just now I was woken up by urinating and found that woman sleeping next to me... Cough, it feels too bad. I don't want to wait for her to wake up, I don't want to Looking at her appearance during the day, I don't even want to have any communication with her. You were alone last night?"

"Yeah." Zhong Xian rubbed his hair.His head doesn't hurt so much anymore.But still lack of sleep.After thinking about it, I went back to bed and planned to sleep for a while.

Where did Deng Yi go?

Zhong Xian touched the mobile phone on the bedside table to look at it.Deng Yi did not leave a message on his WeChat.He may have gone to work.so early?

"Wake up at ten