Give a bellflower to the drowning ghost

146

They stared at each other in the dark rainy night.

Bodyguard Chen said: "But you are worse than me. If it wasn't for Wang Ze, you wouldn't need to die here. You were implicated by him. Besides, you are quite suitable as an audience, and you are not annoying." The meaning is that Wang Ze is very annoying.

This is the only friend Wang Ze considers in his heart.

"I would appreciate it if you could turn this sympathy into action," the ranger said.

Bodyguard Chen smiled: "If you still want to go to the bathroom, I can continue to help, but it's fine if you're big."

The rainwater that leaked in from the roof wet the ranger's hair, and Chen's bodyguard moved the ranger to another position in a leisurely manner.He felt the ranger's heat and smell, and knew all too well that this would pass quickly.

Bodyguard Chen asked: "If you could survive, what would you do?"

147

The smell of rain tinged with rust.

The ranger thought for some time, while Bodyguard Chen patiently waited for his answer.

The ranger finally said: "I want to resign, leave my current job, and go to burn incense and see their families who committed suicide because of writers."

Chen's bodyguard did some research on his experience, and probably guessed that the writer had reached an agreement with him, and even wrote a report and handed it to the boss for review. Last wish is this.

Bodyguard Chen asked, "Do you regret it?"

"No regrets," the forest ranger immediately swallowed back the words, "no, it is impossible to say that there is no regret at all."

At that time, the writer begged him like that.Don't ask him to do anything but stand by and allow him to be free.

But to the rangers, the behavior at that time was tantamount to killing.

But the writer's pain is so real, he can't ask him with ethics, and comfort him with empty words, "You shouldn't give up, tomorrow will be better."

Even now, he probably couldn't do it.

The ranger said: "But if I were given another chance, at that time, I probably could only make this choice. What I regret is that I was not strong enough to support the writers at that time. According to your words, I just didn't Give him enough memories to survive. And all sorts of things, like not taking him to another doctor, all kinds of afterthoughts. Although these attempts are probably just to appease my own conscience..."

Still, it's better to accept this harshness than to give up more people just to rationalize your behavior.

This is what Wang Ze brought to him.

Get redeemed memories.

"But I can't let go of the rest of the people who were affected by this incident." The ranger glanced at Wang Ze who was in a coma. "Before I met Wang Ze, I met some people who wanted to commit suicide for writers, but None of them succeeded, and they didn't really start their careers for writers, so I didn't feel strongly moved. But Wang Ze told me that there are eleven other people who have the same experience as him, and most of these people They all chose to kill themselves, really, for the sake of the writer."

Among the twelve people, except for Wang Ze, some people are probably still struggling in pain, going to collapse step by step, or even giving up.

Their stories have been written into novels by writers, inspiring more people, that is to say, their lives can touch others, but they feel that their own lives are worthless.

It's as if the writer thinks he's worthless.

How can people be worthless?

The ranger said: "The death of the writer brought pain to these people, and the death of these people will bring pain to many more people. And the fuse of all this is me."

Bodyguard Chen said slowly: "Those people have committed suicide, so it has nothing to do with you. People who committed suicide were just eliminated by Darwin's theory, and it can be classified as another optimization of human genes."

"Please don't say that," the Ranger said. "It's such a sad statement. I don't think they're losers on any level, and I don't want others to think so."

Bodyguard Chen said: "After all, people are mortal. Is there really no difference between dying early and dying late?"

The ranger said: "No, I can't tell. I'm not saying that they shouldn't commit suicide, nor that it doesn't matter if they die if no one cares... I'm not qualified to criticize such a profound issue, or give this That’s the end of the story. I just want to go and see for myself, to see what my choices have changed, if possible, or to lift up those who are still struggling in the sea.”

148

Not everyone can stand up on their own, and those who can't stand up often just need a belief that "you are not struggling alone".Even if it doesn't pull everyone up, it's good to give them a break.

Even if you can't do anything, it's okay if you can check it.

The ranger was pulled up by Wang Ze. Although Wang Ze himself was still submerged in the sea of ​​sorrow, he gave him a certain degree of redemption, allowing him to feel the tenderness of human beings again, and made him realize the connection between people. is unavoidable.

There are many things he can't do, and he himself is not a strong-hearted person, but even he was saved and had the opportunity to save another person.Perhaps the next person he saves will eventually choose the same path as the writer, but all this will not be meaningless.As long as human beings have existed, they will have an impact on other people. This is the meaning, and this is the connection of human society.

If you do nothing and stay hidden in the forest, no more bad things will happen, but there will be no more good things either.

The Ranger felt that this would be his way to fight back his inner sea.

149

Bodyguard Chen said: "...you are truly a Holy Mother."

He added quickly: "Or the Holy Father? Anyway, it's really hypocritical."

The ranger immediately realized that Bodyguard Chen was shaken.

Chen's bodyguard and the ranger put a physical distance between them. He stood up, looked for the remaining candy in his pocket, and looked away from the ranger: "I thought you were a wise and safe person, but I didn't expect there to be such a A heart of charity."

He said: "You can't do it. Nine out of ten people who commit suicide have depression. This is not something that non-professionals like you can interfere with. The reasons for their suicide are beyond the current blow. Problems, family and so on, if you want to save these people, you think too much of yourself. Those who don’t want to die don’t need you to intervene, and those who want to die can just let them die.”

The ranger tried to meet his gaze again: "Maybe I can't do it, but I can find someone who can. I only made this decision for my own satisfaction, and I won't change it because of what others think... probably not Will."

Bodyguard Chen smiled exaggeratedly: "Impossible, after all, you are going to die here soon. People who can't even save their own lives, what confidence do they have to say that they want to become a Virgin?"

"I really don't think I'm going to end up here," the ranger said earnestly.

150

Bodyguard Chen fell silent.

The sound of rain was overwhelming.

His companion was sleeping soundly not far away, only he heard something that made him uncomfortable because of insomnia.

Realizing this, he instead woke up from that state of indecision.

Bodyguard Chen smiled: "Am I within the range you want to save?"

"If you're not offended," said the ranger.

Bodyguard Chen said, "Okay, then I'll give you a chance to live."

He took a pistol from his trouser pocket, and popped the blade right in front of the ranger's nose.

He said, "Use this knife to cut off Wang Ze's carotid artery, and I will let you go."

In front of them, Wang Ze lowered his head, as if he knew nothing about his fate.

151

"I can't do that," the ranger said to the tip of the knife.

Bodyguard Chen laughed mockingly. He put the back of the knife on the ranger's face, and gently scratched it: "I know you can't do it, but that's your benefactor. But you can do it first, and wait for me to do it." Untie your hands and kill me with a knife, kill the others, and run away."

The forest ranger shook his head: "We don't need to take each other's lives, we still have a way back before we kill each other."

Bodyguard Chen said: "People who don't even have this kind of awareness, don't talk so much."

"I just didn't want to lie to you," said the ranger.

The bodyguard Chen sneered a few times, and took the knife back: "Then you hold those restraints and die. I will leave here at dawn tomorrow. Brother Hong has already hidden my share of the money for me. Only they will stay and wait for the rest of the day." You and Wang Ze will stay here, wet your pants, and wait for your embarrassing death."

Bodyguard Chen no longer had that calm and composed attitude. He said hastily: "If you dare to kill, you still have a chance before dawn. I will teach you a principle of life before you die: ethics and principles are Only stick to it when you can live. People born like us can’t live without getting their hands dirty, and people who can’t save their own lives should not clamor to save others.”