The Cat's Inheritance

On the first day of entering junior high school courses, Sparta was keenly aware that the number of cats in the class had decreased a lot.He looked back and forth nervously, and was pleased to find that the onion buns didn't follow this time.Hehe, maybe that little fat man didn't pass the graduation exam at all.Sparda flicked her tail triumphantly.

It's a pity that within a few minutes, more and more small windows lit up on the screen, so many that Sparta has lost count.Sparta was surprised when a familiar call pulled him into reality. "Ah, Sparta, I'm Sparta! We're together again! So happy!" Scallion put his short nose in front of the camera and greeted Sparta cheerfully.

Sparta snorted, his beard turned up, and he looked at the scallion bun with confusion.Meow, the world is really small.

Fortunately, the teacher appeared soon and made the noisy classroom quiet again.The teacher is a handsome big cow cat, the whole chin and chest are white, like a big comma drawn on the chest.She looks young and has a playful voice. "Hello everyone, my name is Dou Sprout, and I am your tutor for this stage of study." Teacher Dou Sprout announced that they will enter the 10-minute introduction course for new students.

What is a tutor?Sparta sat cross-legged, looking at the screen puzzled.

After entering junior high school, due to different course selection, students no longer study in the same fixed classroom.The teacher of each course will stay in the exclusive classroom, and the students need to "change shifts" according to the different subjects they choose.Although this step will be done automatically by the system, it is still the student's responsibility to remember the timetable.Every [-] cats will belong to the same virtual class, and there will be a dedicated tutor to be responsible for daily affairs such as management and teaching administration.In normal times, these classmates will not get together, unless the elective courses overlap, or there is a general announcement that needs to be issued.

Hearing this, Sparta became happy again.Speaking of which, it's unlikely that the little fat man, Scallion Bun Stew, will take the same course as him.He flicked his tail happily.That little fat man has been thinking about Miwu, and he still hasn't given up after so long. This enemy Sparta can almost be remembered for a lifetime.

After Mr. Bean Sprout introduced various precautions for new students, he greeted everyone cheerfully. "I wish you success in your studies!"

At this time, the system screens of all cats are updated. According to the course selection, they will be transferred to the corresponding classroom and start the first course.Sparta's first class was Human Language for Dummies (Chinese).This is his dream course, and he has been so excited that he couldn't sleep for several days.He glanced roughly at the classroom, there were only six other students besides him, very good, no scallion buns!

The face of the teacher who taught the introductory human language was pitch-black. After he got a little farther away from the camera, Sparta recognized that it was a Siamese cat with a pair of pretty lake-blue almond eyes. The voice is also very gentle. "Hello, my name is Lianqiu, you can call me Teacher Liqiu. Today is our first class, and we will start with self-introduction. I need to know your names, ages, and why you want to study human language."

Oh, another self-introduction.Sparta was a little less interested.As always the oldest cat in the class, he didn't like this part.However, after studying in preschool and elementary school, he has been able to complete this step proficiently.So, when it was Sparta's turn, he took his time to introduce. "My name is Sparta, yes, I just look that old, I am two years old this year. I want to learn Anthropology because I want to go to university and major in Anthropology, so that I can understand my human language. say what."

Wow, go to college!The other students gasped in amazement.Although every cat has more or less a dream of going to university when entering school, there are very few cats who can really persevere and keep working hard for it.Everyone's eyes showed admiration, which made Sparta very useful. After all, he was a proud cat.

Mr. Briquette shook his beard gracefully to express his appreciation. "Very well, your goal is very clear. I hope that our course can really help you achieve it."

Alright, let's start class now.First of all, our course is called Human Language for Fools, which means Human Language that even fools can learn.As cats, you must know that human language is a very broad concept.As for the human species, it is quite strange. They are not like our cats, who can communicate with cats in any area without any obstacles after mastering a set of cats.Human beings in different regions speak different human languages ​​of different language families. It is impossible for cats to master all of them. Even humans themselves cannot master multiple branches of human languages ​​at the same time.Therefore, the focus of our study is the common human language mastered by most of the humans around us. After all, cats do not like to travel far. Mastering this language family is enough for us to identify most of the communication intentions of humans in daily life.

Of course, our courses are entry-level only.Just as the Spartan students just hoped, in the next stage and even the next stage, you will have the opportunity to learn more complex and complete human languages, such as different local language families.The small human language families that we know that have teaching qualifications are Cantonese, Sichuan dialect, Changsha dialect, Hangzhou dialect and Hokkien dialect. Most of them have only one professor in the country, and there are quite few learning opportunities.Access to these complex advanced courses requires unremitting effort and hard work.Come on everyone.

Sparta exclaimed, it turns out that there are so many human language classifications in the world, it sounds so difficult.Fortunately, I only need to learn the common human language to understand what Miwu said.Good risk, good risk.He licked Mao Mao to calm himself down.

Although theoretical knowledge sounds difficult, the course of Introduction to Human Language is very practical. Mr. Liqiu uses a multimedia teaching method combining video and audio to explain the profound things in simple terms and bring students into the daily life mode. It is easy to comprehend the learning skills in it.

For the first class, the teacher's requirements are not high, and the students only need to master two sentences of everyday human expressions: Come here, are you hungry?

Come here, listen to the human pronunciation again.Remember?It is an indicative term, usually used to call us, often when we are not around humans.So, as a cat, how do you respond to the call of "come" from humans?

It's very simple, just pretend you didn't hear it and ignore it.

You must have clearly understood that human beings are very coquettish, always hoping in vain to have all our attention on them, and we will happily rush to them as soon as they say hello.In fact, this unrealistic fantasy is the original reason why many humans are willing to be taken over by us.

However, the reality is cruel. As cats, we don't like to come and go when we call them.In view of this, the sooner humans recognize the reality, the better a healthy cat-human relationship can be established.We don't take over human beings outrageously asking them to respond to our every call, do we?Instead, we always reason and make them realize that answering our call is the best option.

So, when a human asks you to "come here," you can decide whether you need to respond in the moment according to your mood.You can flick your tail and pretend you heard it; or you can pretend you don’t hear anything, since humans are not 100% sure whether you understand their language anyway.Of course, if you are in a good mood, or if humans have cans you like to eat in their hands, then you can pretend to be very happy and run over to rub their legs, and they will willingly open the cans for you.

The second phrase is very important, are you hungry, let's listen to the audio of human language, are you hungry.I would strongly recommend that all cats memorize this human language, because it is extremely useful.This phrase is used to ask if you want to eat. When humans ask this sentence, it means that they judge that we should need to eat.Since cats are always in a state of craving something, this is an opportunity to claim a favor.Just meow and go back. It doesn’t matter what the meow is. Humans can’t understand it anyway. As long as you respond, they will know what to do.

Hearing this, Sparta raised his paws high. "Teacher, I have a question."

Teacher Liqiu is very kind and friendly, and welcomes questions that interrupt the class, without showing the slightest impatience.

"I want to know how my humans call my name!"

As soon as Sparta's question landed, many cats responded.That's right, we don't know my human language name either. Although we can remember its syllables, we don't know what it is.

Mr. Liqiu shook his ears and said with relief: "Spartan is really a good cat who is eager to learn and has a spirit of inquiry. That's right, human beings call our cats in all kinds of strange ways, and they are not unique, so we must It is very difficult to judge our names from many seemingly meaningless syllables. If you want to understand the meaning of all the names, I am afraid that you will not be able to achieve it until you have entered advanced human language learning. But here I am There is a little trick that can help you figure out the meaning of your name in advance."

The method is very simple, but it needs to resort to the cat's voice system, and requires a flexible mind and the ability to adapt.You can choose a hidden place at home to hide your tablet, mobile phone or other tools that can activate the cat voice system.After instructing the system to start the recording system, at this time, you need to use your cuteness to attract humans.Humans can't help but talk to you, and the system will automatically record their audio and intelligently divide it into different sound blocks.You review these sound blocks afterwards, identify the sound block that matches your name, hand it over to the system for recognition, and you will get the answer soon.

This method also applies to learning those super-class vocabulary you are interested in, and even if used properly, you can rely on the system to translate human languages.With the help of the system, your learning potential will be unlimited.Of course, I don't need to remind everyone that although this method is very good, it is difficult to achieve the perfect effect. You may need to go through several failed attempts before you can succeed once.Therefore, patience is the most important thing.

Sparta listened and shook his fleshy neck excitedly.This method is good, as long as I record the sound of miu, I can quickly know what he is talking about every day.It's cumbersome, but it sounds great!Sparta sharpened his claws, wishing he could run upstairs now, record Miwu's sleep talk, and listen to what he was talking about.

Of course, as a junior high school student, Sparta's homework is still very heavy, and he cannot skip classes casually.In the junior high school stage, cats only have one day off every three days of class. On school days, the classes will be fully arranged according to the cats’ schedule, and even the nap time between classes will be compressed to 10 minutes.Once the somewhat leisurely primary school time is over, the cats will face the brutal junior high school competition.

Immediately after Human Language, Sparta entered the photography course.As Dai Mochi said, the photography course is not to teach cats how to take pictures, but to teach cats how to become a perfect photogenic cat. Perhaps for humans, this course is called the model concave modeling course.

The teacher of the photography course is named Little Prince, a tabby Norwegian deep forest, with a luxurious white big scarf and white gloves, big golden green eyes, at first glance it is a qualified plane model.

"As a responsible cat, how can you make the humans you take over happier? Catching mice? It's too low-level, and it often backfires. In modern society, humans are willing to be taken over by a cat, except for some inexplicable reasons Besides, to a large extent, it's because—" the little prince stopped suddenly when he said this, and when all the cats' eyes focused on him, he continued triumphantly, "Of course it's because we cute."

Our fluffy faces are adorable, our fluffy bellies are adorable, and even our not-so-fluffy paws are adorable.Because we are so cute, humans can't reject us-of course, this refers to most humans, and some humans have such a weird aesthetic that they don't think we are cute, but so what?We are still the cutest.

Humans are so enamored with us, it's natural to want to share our cuteness with other poor humans who don't have cats taking over.This is their kindness and their vanity.As a cat, you must understand the mood of this part of human beings.They provided us with a warm house and delicious food as much as possible. In return, we occasionally need to satisfy their vanity.

What's more, this doesn't require us to do anything, because we are already very cute.

After saying that, Mr. Little Prince tilted his head to one side, and at the same time raised a paw, resting it softly on his cheek, with his eyes wide open, staring at the camera without blinking.

Even if it is an illiterate cat like Sparta who has no theoretical basis for photography, he has to admit that Mr. Little Prince is very cute.

"To sum up, as a model cat, whether your human beings want to take pictures or record videos for you, the most important thing is your camera sense. So how can you have a camera sense—"

Sparda craned his neck for an answer.

"It's very simple, the most important thing is that you look good."

Sparta's beard drooped unknowingly, well, it touched my blind spot of knowledge again.

"Of course, if you are not as good-looking as me, don't be too discouraged. Camera sense can be cultivated. Here are a few simple tips. After you go back, you can use every opportunity to train yourself. I believe it will be soon, you guys They will all become the little princes and princesses of the lens, and surprise your humans."

Lens sense training skill [-], always know where the lens is

Only when you know where the camera is, can you know how to match the camera to show your cutest side.Knowing where the camera is doesn't mean your eyes have to follow the camera forever.This is so stupid, it is almost an entry-level posture, so I suggest that cute people don't try it.Sometimes, we have to learn how to ignore the camera.

Lens sense training skill [-], adjust mentality

There is only one trick, always believe that you are the cutest!If you are not as confident as I am, then every day after waking up, facing the mirror, stand up straight and shout three times: I am the cutest!No cat is cuter than me!It is very helpful for boosting self-confidence.

Camera sense training skills three, know why you are cute

No matter which angle the camera comes from, you have to know what kind of posture is the cutest under that angle.This requires a very good understanding of oneself, knowing which direction every hair on the body grows needs to be clear in the chest.For example, unlike human beings, when they take pictures, they always like to make their heads as small as possible, mainly because they are not cute enough; our cats tend to have bigger heads, bigger eyes, and more The closer to the camera, the cuter it is.Therefore, if you find that the camera is right in front of you and the distance is very close, you might as well bring the distance between you and the camera closer, such as sniffing the camera.Believe me, humans cannot resist cats posing like this.

Basically, master the above three skills and practice diligently, and you will be able to become a very good photogenic cat.The theoretical knowledge is temporarily introduced here, and we will enter the practical link below.

Xin Qin found that his cihuamao has acquired many new habits recently, for example, it used to always lie on the sofa and sleep on its belly.But now it lies face down, with its legs stretched out, its tail neatly placed between its two hind legs, and it can lie down for more than ten minutes at a time. How did you learn it.

"Baibing, what's the matter with you?" Xin Qin couldn't help touching the back of Sparta's round head.Could it be sick?He heard that many cats would put on all sorts of strange poses after being sick.Do I need to send it to the clinic for another check?

Sparta pressed his beard on his face. In fact, this posture is not very comfortable, but the teachers said that this posture is cute and can most seduce human beings.Miu, come and take the bait!Say my name quickly!In this way, I can quickly let the system do the translation for me!He thought of the tablet computer with the recording function turned on that he hid under the sofa, and laughed out loud.

Seeing Sparta still lying on his stomach, Qin Qin couldn't help but sit beside it, pinch its ears, and tease it to move. "Who spread such a big pie here?"

Seeing that his plan was about to succeed, Sparta couldn't help flicking the tip of his tail triumphantly.

Suppressing a smile, Xinqin continued, "What kind of pancake is it? Scallion Pancake?"

Meow, is this word familiar yet unfamiliar?Is it my name too?

"Egg-filled pancakes? Thousand-layer pancakes? Finger pancakes? Multigrain pancakes?"

……

Sparta lay silently on the sofa cushion, thinking, studying is really difficult and painful.

"Sweetheart cake?"

Sparta rolled over and yelled at Miwu, it's so annoying, Miwu don't name me anymore!Human languages ​​are hard to learn!

But Miwu couldn't hear his troubled heart, instead hugged him and laughed out loud.

Hate it.