Silently affectionate

Si Chao had never felt this way before, so that when Su Kesheng walked over to him after hearing the news, his legs were trembling.He couldn't control his rapid breathing, and couldn't hold down the beating heart in his chest.

He could feel his ears heating up, so he made a very abrupt movement under Su Kesheng's suspicious gaze——

He covered his ears, then turned around and fled.

Su Kesheng watched a person who clearly said he was looking for him, but after he came, he touched his ears indifferently, turned around and left expressionlessly.

In Su Kesheng’s memory that day, it was a day that was not painful or itchy, just like usual, except for helping the stage to build the shape, and meeting a very good-looking boy in the backstage, there seemed to be nothing special .

But Su Kesheng didn't know that it was the beginning of his years of secret love as a young man. It was a memory that he buried silently in his heart, enough to secretly recall his whole life. It was the source of his eight years of secret love and all his affection.

That was their beginning, but not really the beginning.

Since then, Si Chao has started his own surreptitious behavior of surreptitiously surreptitiously, breaking even his usual ignorance of people, and inquiring about Su Kesheng through his contacts in many places.But that day he left in such a hurry that he didn't even dare to say hello, let alone ask his name.

So when he finds Su Kesheng and knows his name, it will be more than a month later.

During that whole month, he either lay down in the dormitory, or wandered around the campus looking for Su Kesheng, trying to have a chance encounter or something, or get in touch with the seniors at the welcome party at that time. .

But before anyone could be found, his handsome guy's name was passed out first, and within less than two weeks, he defeated the previous school grass and was promoted to the new school grass of the xx class.

——It wasn't until later that he opened a certain post on the school forum that Si Chao accidentally learned that the school girl he defeated was Su Kesheng, whom he fell in love with at first sight.

While beating his chest and calling himself a fool, why didn't he visit the school forum earlier, he cheered secretly that it would be easier to find information with his name and photo, quickly browsed through the replies to the post, and picked out Su Kesheng's name from among the many comments user ID.

He clicked in instantly, and decisively pressed follow.

However, an ID in the post bar can reveal very limited personal information, Si Chao is not satisfied with these, and has no choice but to start to worry.

Later, he found out Su Kesheng's major, and it was much more convenient to squat every day.

When he was at the first spot, he actually wanted to go up and talk to Su Kesheng or something.But when he saw Su Kesheng's figure appearing in front of his eyes, he was still the same as that day, even his palms were sweating. It is obvious that even if his state is over, the most likely thing is to stammer and say no. Say nothing.

If Su Kesheng had been a little girl, Si Chao might have gone up to strike up a conversation, and even said that when they met for the first time, he would have asked him for a QQ number or a mobile phone number—more likely, the two Man has long been accomplished.

However, Su Kesheng was a man, and he was still a man whose sexual orientation was unknown in front of him. It would be easy for him not to be hated by others if he went up to talk rashly.

The first semester passed amid Si Chao's hesitation.

At that time, he let himself follow Su Kesheng like an idiot every day, and he had already found out all of Su Kesheng's habits. It can be said that none of Su Kesheng's roommates knew about Su Kesheng. .

However, in the second semester, that is, Su Kesheng's graduation season, when he finally survived the winter vacation and was about to confess his love, on the second day after returning to school, he discovered something that made him thunder from the blue.

... Su Kesheng has a girlfriend.

The girlfriend he made was a traditional and gentle girl with a small round face and a small frame. She was chubby and laughed at everyone, and had a very kind and friendly personality.

When Si Chao saw her, she was holding Su Kesheng's arm, talking with a smile.

Si Chao watched from afar, and his courage was smashed to pieces in an instant. He stood in the distance and watched the two go away quietly, not even having the courage to cry.

Because he was a big man—well, not a big man for now, and it was so strange to watch another man cry.

Whether he thinks it's weird or not, everyone around him will think it's too weird.

Although it's true...it's so strange, how could he fall in love with a man?

No one gave him an answer.

Si Chao, who has not yet grown into a real man, faced the person he loves, the hand that he was cautiously trying to touch was hit, so he quickly retracted, he was throbbing, so he no longer dared to raise his head Look up to that person.

He hasn't followed Su Kesheng since then.

However, he always returns to his rented house on weekends, lying on the bed and fantasizing that Su Kesheng might appear on this bed, fantasizing about the living room where he can appear in the next second, fantasizing about the door being knocked a few times, he Walking over to open the door, outside the door is Su Kesheng's smiling face.

He masturbated, fantasized, and daydreamed to his heart's content in that room, but he never dared to look directly at that person's face in reality.

After three months of silence and depravity, Si Chaocai discovered during a certain campus activity that it was almost time for the old students to graduate.

And Su Kesheng is a senior student, one of the students in this graduation season.

When Si Chao saw the big red banners hanging all over the campus, Su Kesheng happened to be passing by talking and laughing with a few friends, his eyes were still smiling, and when he passed by Si Chao, it seemed that there was nothing there. glanced at him.

That glance still had infinite power on Si Chao, making him freeze in place, clenching his fists unconsciously.

Although there is no chance, at least I should let him know what I want, right?

At that time, Si Chao thought so, and followed Su Kesheng again at night when he was off work part-time, and unexpectedly got a chance to "save the beauty as a hero".

Unexpectedly, this should be the beginning of all the stories, but the intersection of the two of them came to an abrupt end.

……

"The next thing is what you know," Si Chao smiled helplessly and sadly, "I helped you beat those hooligans away in a hurry, and I forgot to confess my love in a panic. Originally, I thought there would be a chance next time , but I didn't expect that you didn't even attend the graduation ceremony, and completely disappeared in my world."

Of course, he concealed the shameful past of the rental house, and didn't mention it any more.

Su Kesheng listened quietly all the time - the two of them kept their heads down all the time, and they didn't even make eye contact.

"During graduation, something happened in my family." As soon as Si Chao's voice fell, Su Kesheng raised his head slowly, "And that girlfriend at that time...she has nothing to do with me."

The author has something to say:

This article is a half memory kill