Holding hands can only be happy

I didn’t know until I got back to the class that Xiao Zhou chose that tomboy, and many times afterwards she would always say in my ear, “XXX, so handsome.” I would only reply to her, “Isn’t he already yours? , still like a nympho." Squad leader Zhao finally took Han Yi.All day long, the little recruit I selected has been by my side, as if ready to help me at any time. At night, I finally stared at her helplessly and asked, "What's your name?"

"Squad leader, my name is Lin Su" Hearing her respectful answer, I suddenly felt uncomfortable

"Lin Su, um, I, I don't need you to help me with anything. I'm used to doing it myself. You can read books by yourself, take a rest, or help Squad Leader Zhao do things, you know?" She nodded, as if relaxed. He took a breath.It made me think that everyone has their own pride, but they have to bow down due to reality. Seeing them is like seeing themselves in the first year, but they have changed positions when they look in the mirror. The mentality of the superior is really easy lost.

"Why? Why didn't you choose me?" While I was still thinking, Han Yi's voice came slowly, and when I looked up, Taohua's eyes were filled with tears. I was at a loss, and hurriedly raised my hand to wipe the Bean-sized teardrops said, "Don't cry, I didn't choose you because I'm a person with poor expressive skills. Squad leader Zhao is a professional squad leader. Her ability is definitely better than mine, and I'm also her leader." Come out, you follow her carefully, try for a while, if it doesn’t work, I’ll go and tell her to change you, okay?” She met my eyes and asked earnestly, “Really?” "Really, I promise"

"Then I'll help you make the bed?" Some couldn't keep up with her jumping thinking

"Ah? No, no, I'm used to doing it by myself, go and do your work." Looking at her leaving figure, I repeatedly asked myself, why did I lie to her? Is such a lie really good?In fact, I know better than anyone else that I am afraid that I will not be able to control myself and that I will be sorry for Shun Jun. I must keep a distance from Han Yi, because once my heart is moved, I cannot take it back.

Since the recruits were divided into majors, Shun Jun and I were not in the same class. Our majors were more than theirs. Usually, she was on duty once a day, while I was on duty every two days. Most of the time I was in the class. Reading and waiting for her to come back, Han Yi would sit next to me and talk to me when she was in class.Gradually, I realized that although this girl was older than me, her thinking was very pure and simple. Unlike Shun Jun, there was a mystery in her eyes and heart that I couldn't figure out.

After lunch, I was waiting for Shunjun to come back from the shift. Suddenly I heard a piercing scream. I saw Han Yi clinging to the cabinet with both hands, her feet almost hanging in the air, and the stool fell to the ground. I hurried over to hug her from behind. I grabbed her leg and slowly lifted her down. After she landed, I reprimanded and asked, "What are you doing? Do you want to go to the health team to recuperate?" She said in shock, "Accidentally stepped on the ground."

"Yutong" Shunjun came in at some point, looking sharply at me and Han Yi, these two women seem to be born at odds, between the lightning and the flint, I seemed to be roasted, crackling on the inside, scorched on the outside, tender on the inside. Surprised, she quickly withdrew her hand on Han Yifang, and said in a panic, "Shunjun, you are back." She turned around silently, opened the door and went out without looking back. I quickly chased after her and grabbed her sleeve "Shunjun, I just went to help her when I saw she was about to fall, trust me"

"Well, I believe in you." Her wooden tone made me sad. She said she believed in her words, but she didn't have the slightest sense of trust in me in her expression.In the next few days, Shunjun treated me coldly. Although she still got up early to wake me up, folded the quilt for me, took good care of me, and occasionally chatted with me, but there was something missing in her cold eyes. Warmth, no matter what I do, it's like punching cotton, and it doesn't have any effect.

One day, when I came back from work, I sat on the big stool in the class and stared blankly at the door, thinking that Shun Jun would come to look for me at this time before, but today I haven't seen her come over for a long time.Suddenly there was a weight on my leg, Han Yi hooked my neck, and sat on my lap without any warning. After I reacted, I quickly pushed her away, and Shun Jun came in in an instant, saw it, and left without a trace of hesitation. Yes, I squinted at Han Yi, and said out of my body, "Are you satisfied?", no more words, just sitting quietly.In the next few days, the relationship between Shun Jun and I was completely condensed like a snowfall. When our eyes subconsciously met, the icy look made me not know how to explain it.

At this time, Xiaoyu called me to the corridor and asked, "Yutong, what's wrong with you, did Shunjun treat you badly? She promised me that I would treat you well."

"What do you mean?" I looked at her inquiringly, trying to find the answer from her face

"Shunjun's recruit company and Xiao Zhou are very good, but I think they are too smart. Think about how kind Li Squad Leader Li was to them when we were in the recruit company. In our first year, she even told Xiao Zhou that you I'm gay, and then everyone will know." Such words exploded in my mind with a bang, and the scenes that puzzled me in the past were connected together. I suppressed the anger in my heart and pretended to be calm. "What do you mean by telling me now?"

"I told you because I love you! I love you so much, but I knew you only had her in your heart at the time, so I hope she can treat you well" Oh, what's going on, when did I become so hot?Everyone said they loved me, but they stabbed me straight with knives in their hands

"Do you know what love is?" I said sarcastically, my anger was already unbearable, and my body was about to burst out

"How much do you love Shunjun, that's how I love you" It's harsh to hear, I can't tell what is 'love', what is 'good', and what is 'bad'

"Heh, do you think I will still believe it?" Before she could speak, I ran away resolutely. I really didn't have the courage to listen any more. I don't know how many lies surround me. Squad Leader Li, Squad Leader Chu, Yang Squad leader, Xiaoyu, Han Yi, and even Shunjun, all of them think I'm a fool?I laughed like crazy, troops!I have recognized you, you are fine, fine!

I went to the company headquarters to ask for leave, and rushed to the building where the recruits were trained. Looking at everything I was familiar with here, the door was closed. I didn’t know if there was anyone inside. The "come in" made me feel like I went back to a year ago.Pushing the door open, the platoon leader looked at me in surprise, his nose was sour, and his eyes immediately filled with tears, "Platoon leader, I, I don't know what to do." He stared devoutly at the platoon leader who was still straight , and I am like a novice waiting to be enlightened.

"Oh... I thought that you would come to me crying in the first year. I didn't expect you to be so stubborn. Later, I thought you had grown up by yourself. I figured it out. Now it seems that you are still a little Childish. You are a kind and brave child, but your strength is the most distressing and gratifying. Since I became the platoon leader, you are the first batch of recruits I have led. I have seen your progress little by little. , It’s like watching your own child learn to walk. When you go to the company, I remind you not to trust others easily. That kind of mood also wants you to avoid harm, but you must grow through pain. In fact, Not only in the army, but also in society. This is a small society, and what you have to do is to learn in advance, no matter how harsh the environment is. Kindness is a good thing, but being too kind will only hurt yourself, so you Protect yourself instead of relying on other people's protection. Of course, it can be seen that you have done a good job. It's the second year, please continue to be strong, I believe you can, just like running at that time, um ?”

Staring at her firm eyes, I smiled knowingly, and solemnly promised "Okay!" She looked at me with satisfaction, "Okay, go back quickly, it's not good to stay here for too long." I nodded and went out Before the hospital, I paused and said "Thank you, platoon leader." Seeing that she didn't speak any more, I left this place full of memories reluctantly.Taking a deep breath, exhaling it heavily, looking up at the sky, puffing out my chest, mustering up my courage, come on!Come to me with everything else, I will no longer be afraid, no longer shrink back!

"Yu Tong, Yu Tong, where have you been? I can't find you anywhere" Seeing the eagerness in Shun Jun's eyes

"Is something wrong?" She was stunned by the cold tone.

"Xiaoyu was talking about the previous thing, after you were drunk that time, and I was not sure about myself, so I told Xiao Zhou." She frowned tightly, and hurriedly explained

"It's okay, let's talk about it, I really am" Before I finished speaking, I interrupted her and said nonchalantly

"Don't treat me like this, okay?" Her soft begging made my heart twitch, fearing that I couldn't help but soften my heart, so I stopped talking and trotted back to my class

In the days that followed, I tried my best to keep myself calm and avoided all contact with them, except for on-duty training, which was to watch the 'Daxian' dance.I don't know how to dance. After watching it for a long time, I was surprised to find that her dance was full of strong sadness. She swirled lightly - raised her legs - landed, and every movement seemed to be crying.When she stopped, I couldn't help asking: "Why?" She understood the question without beginning and end, and looked at me fixedly: "Yu Tong, you are very kind, Shun Jun It’s also very good. The past can’t be changed. If you don’t cherish the present, it will eventually become the past. Life is actually very cruel to people. Sometimes, even a small dream can never be realized. Reality is reality , it lingers on our minds and bodies, and then numbs until all the blood is drained!" After finishing her shocking words lightly, she began to dance lightly again.It turns out that she doesn't only live in her own world, she is so sensitive, maybe it's just because she has no choice but to stay in her own pure land.

The calm on the surface seems to always hide the turbulence. After that time, Han Yi and I have no contact. On this day, she hurried to me and panted: "Squad leader, company commander told me Want me to go to the art team" Hearing this, I paused and said lightly: "Go, this is a good thing!"

"You want me to leave so much, are you afraid that I will disturb you?" The enchanting peach blossom eyes have dimmed, and I continue to hold my heart, and said casually, "Yes, if this is what you want to hear, I can tell you"

"Do you really have no feelings for me at all? I like you, you know, I have liked you since the next day, but why have you never seen me in your eyes?" She said with all her strength, straight She looked at me straight, as if she was trying hard to see the retention in my eyes. This kind of her touched my nerves, and she pinched her hands firmly into the flesh, restraining her desire to pity.

"I'm sorry, I" before I could finish, she interrupted me

"You don't need to say anything, I promise you, I'll go" staring at her charming eyes full of determination, I couldn't say a word.

"Can I give you a hug for the last time?" I was moved by the lonely begging, I stretched out my arms to hug her, and embraced her in my arms. Sure enough, I didn't feel a heartbeat at all, and I really didn't feel any affection for her.After a long time, I wiped away tears for her, and whispered, "Take care of yourself"

After sending off Han Yi, everything returned to calm, but Shun Jun and I were still indifferently embarrassed.Huang Shen watched the dance of 'Daxian' end, and after wandering for a long time, he went forward and said, "XXX, can you do me a favor?"

"What?" She was a little surprised

"Help me entrust your comrades in the art team to take care of Han Yi." This is the first time I asked for help, I thought it would be better to be direct

"Okay" I was a little at a loss when I agreed cleanly and without asking why, and said leisurely: "The life there should be better than here, right?"

"Well, at least I think it's simpler and cleaner than here." At this moment, her tranquility reassures me.

"Yutong, the company commander is calling you to come over," Xiao Zhou hurriedly ran over and said

"Oh..." I adjusted my clothes unhurriedly, walked to the company headquarters, knocked on the door, and shouted "report, company commander hello" has become a fixed mindset. As long as I walk to the door of the superior leader, my hands and mouth will cooperate Homework does not need to go through the brain at all.Seeing me coming in, the company commander asked with a smile, "Yu Tong, there is a place in our company to study as a hygienist. I would like to recommend you." I quickly digested it and replied, "Company commander, I don't think I am suitable for it." Go, this year I must be demobilized and go home. It is only suitable for those who want to stay in the team. I think this opportunity should be given to comrades in need.” After finishing speaking, the company commander neither agreed nor objected, but just let me Go back first.In fact, I have no idea in my heart. I am afraid that he will let me obey without asking for my opinion. At this moment, I can clearly see what I am most reluctant to part with. Shunjun, if I don’t leave this time, So, let's start over!

Sitting heavily in the class, thinking about the hygienist, suddenly heard the crying voice of the class next door, Shunjun, with a 'thump' in his heart, and ran over at the fastest speed, only to see Shunjun sitting there, seeing me He came in without saying anything, stubbornly wiped away his tears, his heart ached, and asked Xiaoli, who was standing stupidly next to him, "What happened?" Seeing that Shunjun was still silent, Xiaoli explained, "She is a professional That recruit Liu Xu, who did something wrong by himself, went to the professional squad leader to sue Shunjun, saying that it was Shunjun who did it. I was so angry that at this moment Liu Xu opened the door and came in. I rushed over and kicked her hard, grabbed her by the collar, and said fiercely, "I tell you, don't think that if we keep quiet, we will be silent." When we are easy to bully, please remember, you are still a new recruit, put yourself in the right position, if you dare to bully Shunjun again, I don’t mind beating you up!” After recovering from my rage, Shun Jun and Xiaoli hurriedly pulled me back, glared at her angrily, let go of their hands, thinking: if the tiger doesn't show its power, does it really treat me as a sick cat?Although I have never fought, I have been beaten at any rate, and I know what kind of lethality is more powerful.

Seeing Liu Xu's terrified face running out, I took Shunjun's hand and stared at her. I looked at her for ten thousand years, as if I had gone through the vicissitudes of life for a few years. But because of me, they looked at each other with affectionate eyes, and couldn't help touching that flawless face, their eyes were full of tenderness. "Cough, cough, okay, okay, please restrain yourself, there is still a big living person!" Xiaoli's voice brought us back to reality, and I teased indifferently, "Then you are still here, Don’t you know how to avoid it?” Just when she was about to refute, Xiao Zhou came in and said seriously, “Yu Tong, Squad Leader Zhao told you to come over.” I was taken aback, then nodded, thinking: It must be that Liu Xu has gone to sue again.He walked into the class awe-inspiringly, pushed the door open, glanced sarcastically at Liu Xu who was standing in front of Squad Leader Zhao, and scoffed, "Yo, as expected, a dog can't change eating shit, why do you like to complain so much?"

"Yutong, what's the matter? Why did Shunjun beat her?" Squad leader Zhao stopped me now, looked back at Shunjun who followed me in, and said with a sneer, "Shunjun? I said Liu Xu, obviously I hit you, why are you talking about Shunjun again? Can you not even tell who hit you? Or do you actually fall in love with me and want to be beaten by me?" Staring at Liu Xu's face I was told that it was red and then white, and I didn't expect when I was so sharp-tongued.

"Enough, Yu Tong, how can you beat recruits?" Squad leader Zhao's face was livid

"Why don't you ask her what good deed she has done?" I replied without showing any weakness

"What's your attitude?" Now, she was completely angry

"You should ask the attitude of the recruits you have taught. They step on my stool and plaster every day with their shoes on, and never wipe it after they get off. I turn a blind eye to these things. Now it's all right. What does it mean to sow dissension in the status of the squad leader? I never asked them to do anything for me, but the minimum respect should be there, right? I think they are two-year soldiers now, and I am a new soldier!" Filled with righteous indignation, anger looking straight at her

"Yutong, where do you think you are? You go to other people's shifts all day long, and you just go to the computer room as long as you meet Shunjun at work. The monitor on duty always complains to me. Do you think you are someone in this class?" Do you think of me as your class monitor?" Seeing her raised eyebrows, turning over old accounts, reminded me of the shrew in the market, the teacher I respected in the past, the person who taught me tirelessly and patiently, but now Standing on the opposite side with me, there was a burst of sadness, and she looked at her sadly, "If you think these recruits are good, you can live with them as much as you want, and I will not come back to the class from today on. How about it!" Leaving Xiao Zhou and them looking at each other in blank dismay, I walked out of the class without a trace of nostalgia, taking Shun Jun, Xiao Li and Xiao Yu who came over at some point.Back in Shunjun's class, we sat down face to face and had a small meeting. Xiaoyu first said, "Recently, a female assistant instructor came in. I heard that he will specialize in managing female soldiers. If Zhao X goes to sue you incredible"

"Yeah, you're too impulsive," Xiaoli continued

"Actually, it would be great if Han Yi was here today." Shun Jun's words surprised me

"It's okay, the soldiers will block you, and the water will cover you." I said calmly, and they were at a loss for what to do with their stable appearance. Looking around at their stunned expressions, I smiled dumbly and said, "Okay, don't worry, I'm no longer the idiot I was before. I’m so stupid.” What I didn’t say was, I don’t know if I can stay here, but before I leave, I will definitely clear up all the obstacles for her. I can offend the whole world, and even break my own heart. The bottom line, but I will never allow anything that hurts Shun Jun to happen in the slightest.

"That's good, I can tell you, that Liu Xu took Zhao X into obedience again." Xiao Zhou walked in unhurriedly and said

"Well, I know what's going on" I guessed that this guy stayed there to find out the truth

The calm days are bound to bring waves again. The legendary deputy director came as scheduled, wearing big waves and military uniforms. He really has a special flavor. With such a high profile, the background should be quite big. Although the general female platoon leader can stay She has long hair but must be tied up. As we expected, she conducted a "rectification" on the female soldiers and had to go round the room in the middle of the night, so I had to go back to the original class and sleep for a while. Zhao X is also flattering and flattering, and incidentally sued us for many things.We gathered all the soldiers of the same year to brainstorm, and we jointly elected Xiao Zhou as the correspondent of the commander, who was able to spy on the enemy's situation, sow dissension, and listen to the wind.In this way, these "little partners" and I blew the horn against the non-commissioned officers "hand in hand, heart to heart". After a arduous struggle, it ended in a stalemate with neither side winning.

During the period, I fell ill again and had a low-grade fever for nearly a month. Shun Jun stayed by my side except on duty. Sometimes when I was confused by the fever, I vaguely remembered her gently calling me to get up to eat and drink water. , Feed me medicine, looking at her always full of moist eyes, I was also anxious.When I really recovered, seeing the anxiety in Shun Jun's cold eyes, losing her former expression, and her thin face that was one size smaller, I felt extremely distressed in my heart. Such a god-like woman is now... Because of me, she lost her position and messed up her snow-like world. With such a love, how many lifetimes should I promise her stability?