Holding hands can only be happy

No matter how detailed and careful the plan is, it will always be caught off guard by reality, defeated completely, and then it can only be accepted without any strength to fight back.In the hottest July in the south, Shun Jun endured the extreme discomfort and accompanied me to the driving school to practice driving. When she introduced Xiao Xiao as my comrade-in-arms, her clear expression should be that she already knew that the person in front of her was me. As I told her before, there was a hint of embarrassment in the air, but fortunately, I was worried that I would be too cold.When I was practicing the car, I watched Shun Jun take pictures with her mobile phone through the rearview mirror. When Xiao Xiao was practicing, I finally couldn't help asking in a low voice, "Why do you keep taking pictures of me secretly?"

"Sneak shooting, I'm doing it above board!"

"Okay, then why did you shoot me openly?" asked dotingly

"I won't tell you." Looking at her pale face but arrogant, she smiled knowingly, and then she whispered in my ear, "You look very handsome when driving."

When I got home, Shun Jun's complexion became more and more ugly. After I put her down, she took her temperature and found that it was 39 degrees. Suddenly, she was confused and panicked and asked her mother what to do. My mother immediately said in a low voice. Said, "Go to the hospital quickly, this person has a fever in our house, what should we do if something goes wrong?"

"Let's go to the hospital to see if it's okay?" He came to the bed and coaxed her softly.

"I don't want to go, it's okay, just rest for a night"

"But you are like this, I am very worried, I don't know what to do" Seeing her weak expression, my heart was pierced

"My own body is clear, it's fine." Weakly holding my hand, the hot temperature made me worry.

My mother couldn't help the storm, so I went to the hospital. After I was busy, my mother actually called Shunjun's mother. After her mother came overnight, she kept thanking me and my mother.

"We have gone through a lot. You can say that we are comrades in arms who have lived and died together, so you don't have to be so polite." After organizing the language, I decided to say this, because I think some things can't be rushed, but when I finished speaking, Shun Jun's face It became gloomy immediately, and I looked at her as if sitting on pins and needles, but I didn't know where I was wrong.

Taking care of Shunjun without sleeping or eating, she finally couldn't bear it and caught a cold. My mother was anxious and told me many times to let Shunjun go back first, but I didn't care or take it to heart.One day at dinner, she said tactfully in front of Shunjun, "You have to take the second test in two days. You are so cold that you keep passing it. How are you going to take the test? Let Shunjun go back first, and wait until he recovers." Come back after you've finished your exams."

After struggling, I obeyed my mother's words, "Why don't you go back first and find you after I finish the exam?" Her disheartened and cold eyes filled with tears, "When I gave up everything and came to you, I chose you regardless, but now I have the courage and no conditions! Why am I always giving, I have done so much for you, can’t you see? Every time a problem occurs, it is me You apologize, if I really don't care, I won't do things that make me feel undignified again and again! I finally told my mother about our affairs, but you broke it for life by saying that we are just comrades in arms! "

My eyes were red, and I was silent for a long time, unable to say anything full of my heart.From the first time she shed tears, every time it will deeply burn my heart, the scalding temperature will leave a deep imprint every time, so I hope she will stop crying, her heart is riddled with holes, yes I myself don't know what love is, and I always misunderstand her. I only know how to care about what I have paid. She is cold and aloof and has removed all the disguises in front of me, but I fell in love with her who is full of emotions and desires, and I can't extricate myself... …

On the way to send her away, I have never felt so cowardly, full of desire to keep her, but pushed her away again and again.I don't know how to protect her such a heavy love. Before this, I have never loved someone so deeply. Some of them are just the germination of youth. The first time I fell in love, it is such an unusual love that makes me Confused.It was she who let me know what love is, and it was she who insisted on our love time and time again, the love that she cared about but didn't say easily, and she gave all the love silently.

On the morning of the subject [-] exam, I still had a low-grade fever, so I pulled myself together and drank two Cokes.I got in the car and put on my seat belt, still in a daze. I didn't even look at the parking spot on the side, so I just drove in with the feeling of the car, and got a full score.

In August, when I was about to go crazy with missing, I walked into a store that I had visited together before, but I couldn’t find the item that she liked last time. I stumbled home and suddenly found that I had promised a lot, But it didn't come true, only to realize that he was a very unqualified lover.

The coin hanging around her neck is a piece of affection she chiseled out with a compass with her bare hands, and the safety pendant on the car is a piece of missing she shows off.The pillow brought back from the army, every appearance of her is engraved in my heart, very deep.

Numbly, according to the plan drawn up before, the days of picking up the books again are boring, but I think about Shunjun in my mind, thinking about the promise to go to her after the exam, and I keep insisting.When I was tired, I drank coffee without sugar. When I was tired, I hummed the song I wrote for her, thinking that one day I must sing it to her.The adult college entrance examination in October finally brought an end to the unremitting efforts during this period.

On December 2011, 12, when I was full of joy and wanted to find her and play her the song I wrote for her, the breakup came without warning, no matter how much I didn’t want it, it still came .

She often said that she is sunny only when I am well, but without her, how can I be well?Her clothes were still in place, seemingly waiting for her return at any moment.

I said: If I am willing to give up everything to be with you, is there still a chance?

She said: It's too late to cover the water

Then, let go of each other, I can't bear the lingchi of a knife, let's end it all at once!

Farewell, God in my heart, take my hope, be happy!

If she likes Bianhua, then we will lead to hell and perish together.

If she wants to be free, I will let her go and watch her fly with the wind.

In December 2011, all thoughts were lost, my mind was empty, and I was groggy. I only ate one meal a day for nearly a month. Finally, I was admitted to the hospital. But the stomach just couldn't hold food, and I had to hang glucose every day. Finally, I was forced to eat bacteria like lime by the so-called famous doctor, saying that it was because there were too few beneficial bacteria in the body.

On the day of the entrance exam, my mother was holding the porridge she made for me. She was afraid that I would collapse if I couldn’t hold on. She kept persuading me to drink a few more sips before I entered the exam room. Worried, after stuffing a few mouthfuls indiscriminately, there was another violent churning in the stomach, and he still vomited it out.

Walking into the examination room, looking at the examination paper that was exchanged for two years of military career, it was precisely because of it that I lost Shunjun, and my heart was full of pain. Looking at the writing around me, my eyes regained Si Qingming, with a little reluctance in his heart, held the pen in his hand and wrote without hesitation.After the end, look up at the blue sky, Shun Jun, no matter what the result is, I promised, I will wait for you right here!

Four years later, she inadvertently opened the WeChat account of her only friend, and looked at the wedding photos in the circle of friends, thundering, and the pain in her heart that could no longer be faked.After a long time, I replied "Congratulations", and saw her "Thank you"

The farthest distance, the most poisonous hatred

It's not that you don't know my love, it's not that there is no fate

but at the end, only the last

my congratulations and your thanks

Seeing the familiar avatar flashing on QQ, I mustered up the courage to click on it, as if it had been a lifetime

"Are there?"

"exist"

"..."

"I saw your wedding photo before. It's very beautiful. When are you going to get married?"

"I have received the certificate, but I haven't held a banquet yet"

"Okay, you're happy

"I don't want to hear you say this, I'm not good, I'm not happy"

"why?"

"I want to see you"

"it is good"

please give me happiness