howl brilliant

The day I went to Li Xiao’s house, the weather was very good. I went out after lunch, the sun was bright, and I didn’t feel cold at all. After a long journey from bus to bus, I finally arrived at Li Xiao’s house. I listened to the voice on the bus Announcing the station, swaying on the car for too long, it made me feel comfortable and sleepy, but fortunately, it was almost here, otherwise I would really fall asleep, watching the car slowly driving into the platform, I saw it from a long distance That blue figure, Li Xiao, he was wearing the same coat as me, standing in the sun, his eyes were slightly squinted, when he saw the car coming into the station, his eyes were searching for me in the crowd, he smiled when he saw me He waved at me, probably because his smile infected me, and my sleepiness drifted away in an instant.

I walked up to him, and he patted me on the shoulder and said, "Go home, I made red bean and red date soup"

I nodded and followed him, and the two of them walked into the community one after the other.

After entering the community, Li Xiao slowed down and walked towards me. I turned my head and met Li Xiao's eyes. Li blinked at me. I was still confused, but his hand had already taken mine.

I'm actually used to him touching me, but this time it was a bit of a surprise. Now that I was outside in broad daylight, I couldn't help being nervous. I looked around and whispered: "Be careful not to be seen."

Li Xiao was very calm: "There is no one now, I have seen it, and if you see it, you will see it." He shrugged: "I don't care."

Probably because he was by my side, even if I was really seen, I didn't seem to be afraid, so we held hands and walked with some brazenness. I took a deep breath, and the cold air entered my lungs, and it was cool. , but it can give people a very refreshing feeling, just like my current mood.

After returning home, Li Xiao served me a bowl of red bean soup. I drank it, it was hot, sweet, and very comfortable.

"Is it okay to have hot pot at night?" Li Xiao opened the refrigerator to get something.

"Okay, I can eat anything." I put the bowl in the sink, turned on the tap and washed the bowl.

Li Xiao took out the dishes one by one from the refrigerator and placed them on a table.

"So much"

"It just looks like a lot, I bought a little of everything, not a lot, just a lot of varieties"

"Let me help you"

He looked at me and smiled, "Okay, you can wash the vegetables and put them in the bowl"

We were busy for two full hours. Li Xiao was very careful in his work. After the vegetables were washed, they were sorted and put away in a basin with dripping water. After the mushrooms were washed and cut, they had to be blanched again. The radishes were all peeled. Then slice.

"Your knife skills are good." I took a few slices of white radish, they were all about the same size, and nothing was particularly thick.

Li Xiao lowered his head and was cutting potatoes. He only grinned when he heard me say this: "Is there anything good about it? It's just too much."

I put all the potatoes he had cut into a bowl with water, and Li Xiao said that this would prevent the potatoes from turning black.

"Go in and have a rest, you can also play with your mobile phone, the water is so cold, I'll fix it right away"

"No" I started to tear the enoki mushrooms after finishing the potatoes and made them smaller "I'll stay with you" I said.

There was the sound of the knife being put down, I turned my head, Li Xiao's chun touched my chun lightly, his cold fingers touched my ears and gently rested on my bosom, the soft touch of the chun on his lips was instant Li Xiao looked at me and smiled gently.

He had already picked up the knife and continued to chop vegetables. Hearing the regular sound of the knife touching the cutting board, I suddenly wanted to do something to preserve this moment.

What comes to my mind is the scene that happened countless times in my house. Mom and Dad are sitting in the living room choosing dishes together. Mom is always talking non-stop. I just agreed with a smile, because it happened too often, I didn’t feel much before, but now, I suddenly want to go through this with Li Xiao, spend this ordinary day that only belongs to the two of us, like me Like my parents, from youth to age, I am happy in a flat way.

When the sun was about to set, Li Xiao brought in the quilt and clothes that had been drying outside. He put the clothes on the chair, put the quilt on the bed and began to fling the quilt.

"Let me help you"

"Okay." Li Xiao spread out the quilt cover and asked me to grab the two corners. He also spread out the quilt himself, and stuffed the quilt into the quilt cover corner to corner. After stuffing, he told me to grab the two corners. I walked to the other side to set up the other two, and the whole process took about two to three minutes.

"Okay," he said, "bring me the clothes."

"Oh" I hugged all the clothes to the bed, and we sat by the bed and started to fold the clothes.

"Li Xiao," I said, "You are almost on the same level as my mother. If I live alone like you, I can turn this place into a doghouse in a week."

Li Xiao shook his head: "Of course you can't do it now. I used to be the same as you when my mother was still there. There's no other way. People are forced out."

I think Li Xiao is right and wrong. Although people are forced out, they can be forced out or not. I asked him: "Li Xiao, do you miss your mother?"

"It's much better now. After all, it's been so long, and many emotions have faded away. I still remember the year when my mother just passed away. I really found it difficult to breathe. Those who killed my mother, I really Want to kill them with my own hands, no matter what price I have to pay for it, but the fact is that I don't even know where they live, they are not from the same world as me, they are rich and powerful, and I am just a poor student , if my aunt hadn’t taken me out of there after my mother’s death, often accompanied me and enlightened me, I think I’d probably be stuck in a dead end for a long time.”

I sat next to Li Xiao and gently held him in my arms. I have never experienced those things, so I couldn't understand how painful Li Xiao was at that time, but even if it was a little late, I wanted to bear it together with him: "Thank you You tell me this, I know it makes you sad, I'm sorry"

Li Xiao also hugged me and said: "It's okay, these things have been in the past for a long time, I have never told anyone, and I can't find anyone to tell, I feel very good that I can tell you now."

He let me go and took my hand: "Fang Can, I want to be with you for a long time, so I will not hide my past, and I don't want to hide it. Those who killed my mother, One day I will make them pay the price. Before I met you, my only goal in life was this matter. Now, besides this matter, I still want you, Xiaocan, you will always be with me, yes ?"

I looked at him and nodded seriously, Li Xiao smiled.

In the evening, Li Xiao took out the electric pot, and spread the prepared vegetables and meat on top of each other. The soup base was the bone soup that Li Xiao made himself. I looked at the pot full, and there was a table full of vegetables , The saliva began to linger in the mouth.

Li Xiao turned on the battery, took out two cans of beer from the refrigerator and asked me, "Will you drink it?"

"Why do you still buy this?" I said, "I'm not good at drinking." I never drink alcohol, and the only thing I can drink among alcohol is beer, but I don't think beer is good.

"Actually, I'm not very good at it either." Li Xiao put the beer on the table and smiled sheepishly.

"Then you still buy it?"

"I think..." Li Xiao rolled his eyes and looked at me meaningfully: "We should need it to play some role."

What he said was so technical that I felt instantly shocked. I stood there and looked at him awkwardly, not knowing how to reply to him.

Maybe my expression is not natural, or maybe I'm blushing, or. . .I probably unconsciously showed an expectant expression on my face, Li Xiao walked towards me slowly, I stood there, watching him approaching me, couldn't help swallowing.

He kissed me hard.

As soon as the matter got out of hand, I felt that I was hugged tightly by him, and his body weight slowly went up to me. I started to back up, and then we fell on the bed, and Wen continued.

I feel like we took all of each other's clothes off in just 1 minute, even though we were both neatly dressed and even wearing coats.

There was the sound of the two of us breathing next to my ears. I raised my head and looked at the ceiling with dim eyes. I hugged Li Xiao's back with both hands. Li Xiao kept biting my body, and the touch made me tremble.

He raised his head and looked at me, his eyes were full of impulsiveness and a smile: "You are ying"

I lifted my waist and dinged him: "You too"

Then we move on.

The electric cooker on the table made a sound of "呵呵呵". If the glass lid on it hadn't sank, it would have been pushed open by the steam a long time ago.

"The hot pot is on" I pushed him.

"Let him drive"

"Hey...Of course burn the pot through" I was a little dumbfounded by our impulsiveness, I was so hungry and thirsty that I didn't even eat, and I was really drunk.

"It's not that easy, hot pot is meant to be boiled"

I couldn't bear it anymore, and punched him in the chest, "Friend, go down and unplug the power, I'll kick him to death, believe it or not"

Li Xiao got out of the bed and turned off the power.

Back on the bed again, Li Xiao leaned on me and kissed me little by little: "Xiao Can" His eyes were bright, eager to express: "Can I rape you? I want to rape you"

I looked at him and wanted to nod, but my body didn't quite obey me. I knew what Li Xiao was going to do. It should be said that I knew something about it before. I checked it on the Internet, and I became more sure. I like each other, so I don't feel scared, I even look forward to it, and now we are in a close relationship, he really asked me, and I was at a loss in my heart.

I looked at Li Xiao, and felt that my heart was beating surprisingly loudly. I thought Li Xiao would ask me again, but he didn't. He just continued to stroke my head, smiling calmly as if he already knew my answer. watch me.

When he took out the prepared things and dangled them in front of me, I felt like I had to breathe hard to calm myself down. I swear to God that I didn't have the slightest reluctance, but I watched him put the condom on. Goosebumps all over the body will rise immediately, relax and relax!I yelled at myself in my heart, but my shenti started to dou, and it was an uncontrollable kind. I turned my face away and closed my eyes, trying to calm down my body by adjusting my breathing.

Li Xiao pawed back at me: "Relax" he said "I won't hurt you, Xiaocan"

I closed my eyes and nodded lightly. I heard Li Xiao's nasal chuckle next to my ears. He turned me over, and I grabbed the pillow with both hands. His tui was pushed away by him, and something cool flowed onto my tui. In the meantime, I covered my head in the pillow and clenched my hands tightly.

I waited for the next step, but the body was flipped back, and Li Xiao called me: "Xiao Can, Xiao Can, what's wrong?"

I opened my eyes, and Li Xiao was looking at me, the desire in his eyes was gone, replaced by anxiety and concern.

"I..." I knew that I was shaking so badly that even my teeth couldn't help chattering.

"Are you cold, or are you afraid? You are covered in cold sweat." He held me in his arms, and spread the quilt to cover our chiluo's body.

I couldn't answer him, because I didn't know why I did this, I could only hug Li Xiao tightly, I was afraid that he would get angry.

After hugging like this for a while, I felt my body gradually warmed up and stopped shaking. I sighed, thinking about it just now, it was really possible that it was cold, and of course there was also an element of nervousness.

"Better." Li Xiao also felt that I had relaxed a lot.

I expressed that I wanted to cry without tears for my behavior, Li Xiao pulled me up, and then handed me the clothes: "Let's eat first, let's"

I took his hand that was about to put on clothes, and said stubbornly: "Let's continue, I can continue, I was cold just now"

Li Xiao pulled away my hand, picked up the clothes beside me and helped me put them on: "Let's eat first, you are not hungry."

The more I think about it, the more cowardly I feel: "Don't eat"

Li Xiao continued to help me get dressed: "I was too anxious just now, Xiaocan" he louched me into his arms "I love you, so your feelings are the most important thing to me, I know your heart Doesn't repel me, I can feel it, that's enough"

I sipped my mouth and let him hold it: "It's all your fault"

Now it was Li Xiao's turn to cry and laugh. I made a face at him, turned around and continued to get dressed.

I heard Li Xiao laugh wryly behind me.

The two of us ate all the food in the pot. After eating for almost two hours, we also drank all the beer. After eating, we became hot all over and our stomachs were swollen. We put all the things in the kitchen. After finishing the table, I helped Li Xiao dry the washed dishes and put them in the cabinet. After finishing all this work, I still felt that there were a lot of things that I hadn't digested.

"Let's go." Li Xiao said, "Go down for a walk."

So we put on our coats and went out.

Walking aimlessly, the weather was cold, I had enough clothes on my body but the exposed parts turned red after a while, Li Xiao put my hand in his coat pocket: "Xiao Can"

"kindness?"

"What do you want to do after graduation?"

"What are you doing? I haven't thought about it. It's probably an accountant. My mother will take care of it for me. I don't care."

Li Xiao couldn't laugh or cry: "Can you be more rough?"

I said boldly: "That's what it is, even if I want to find it myself, my mother probably won't agree. Besides, my mother will definitely find it for me."

"What about you?" I asked.

"I, I will probably start a company, I need money, you know why"

I nodded. Indeed, Li Xiao is different from me. He has goals and things he thinks must be done, and I believe in his ability: "I believe you can do it."

Li Xiao smiled: "I hope, Xiaocan, do you want to go to other places?"

"Outside? Where?"

"Over there at my house"

"Why are you going there? Isn't this a first-tier city? Do you want to go back?" I forgot that Li Xiao was brought here by his aunt.

"No, I'll just say it casually"

Let's move on.

"Li Xiao, stay here. If you want to make money, you can also make money here. My mother probably won't allow me to go to other places." I think Li Xiao will ask, so he must have considered it.

Li Xiao looked at me and raised the corners of his mouth.

I thought he said yes.

At night, Li Xiao turned on the electric blanket. Although the room was cold, the quilt was warm. We hugged each other, and everything happened naturally. When he entered me, my scalp felt sore and numb. He He leaned over to ask me, and I asked him too. After he started to move, the pain gradually eased. He touched my yao with one hand and touched my bottom with the other. I could even feel his things touching me slowly. In the process of growing up slowly, he hit and fell, which made me almost unable to breathe fully. I felt that I was lost in his arms: "Li Xiao, Li Xiao" I called him, the voice was weak, revealing three points Powerless, seven people were addicted.

My heart was full of feelings for him, and I suddenly had an illusion that I had grown up and become an adult, I had something I wanted to protect, and I realized the difference between liking and love, and I was willing to bear the pressure from the outside world for this person Pressure, we will eventually come together, like my mom and dad.

In the second half of the third grade, this is our last half year in school. For the whole school year of the fourth grade, the school will recommend us to various internship units one after another. If it goes well, we can stay there after graduation, so we don’t have to face The dreaded embarrassment of being unemployed right after graduation.So now this half year is very important. We start to examine certificates. Only six certificates can be exchanged for a graduation certificate, and the word graduation can only be written on our graduate recommendation form.

The atmosphere in the class has obviously begun to change, not only in class, but even in private, everyone seems to have reservations, which is normal, the school is recommended, but not every unit recommended is excellent, okay It is impossible for everyone to share resources. No matter how good the relationship is, this kind of time can only be done according to one's ability.

Li Xiao and I didn’t change much. In the morning we would hide in Qinre’s empty classroom, and after school he would ride his bicycle to take me to the station. Day by day, we lived the same but different days.

Li Xiao always told me that the practical class is very important, not just for the exam, but to truly make what the teacher said into my own.

Even if he doesn't say it, I still know that Li Xiao is smarter than me and sees farther than me. To be honest with him, I will be under pressure, so I also try my best to make myself better, at least I don't need to be inferior to him. too far.

In May, almost all the test results came out. Students who did not get all the certificates needed to attend the school's intensive training class until they passed. Of course, Li Xiao and I were not among them.

After saying goodbye to the pressure of schoolwork, I was naturally in a super good mood. When I got home, I asked Li Xiao: "Shall we go out and have a big meal to celebrate?"

Li Xiao pushed the car and looked at me funny: "What are you celebrating, let's talk about it after the internship unit is settled."

I'm not worried at all, anyway, even if the internship unit is not good, my mother will drag me down, but Li Xiao is fine. . .

"Are you worried about the place of internship, you are so good, there should be many places for you"

Li Xiao shook his head: "I'm not worried about that."

"Then what are you worried about?"

Li Xiao looked at me and sighed.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

He stopped and looked ahead and I heard him say "I won't stay here after graduation, I'll go back"

go back?where?I didn't understand at first, but I immediately understood: "Are you leaving here?"

Li Xiao looked at me and replied helplessly and firmly: "Yes, my roots are there. I want to go back and do what I have to do."

I opened my mouth slightly, as if I had been slapped suddenly, my mind went blank, and I couldn't speak for a long time.

Li Xiao said: "Xiao Can, can you go with me?" In fact, when I asked this question, I could hear that Li Xiao himself lacked confidence.

I shook my head: "It's impossible, my family won't agree." The sudden change made me confused about my emotions, and I almost asked anxiously: "Why do you have to go there if you want to make money? Isn't it the same here?"

His tone became cold: "I said, my roots are there"

"Then I was born and raised here. According to you, my roots should be here. How could I leave my parents and go with you?! I have a family, and my home is here! It doesn't matter where you are Well?" As soon as I said that, I regretted it, and I poked Li Xiao's sore spot.

Li Xiao didn't give me time to react, he rode away directly, leaving me there alone.

Li Xiao and I had a cold war.

In the morning, there was no one in the classroom and cafeteria, and he didn't come at all. My heart was so empty.

I sat in my seat anxiously, and finally waited for him to appear. There were already many people in the classroom. He walked in from the outside, with a straight face, and sat down in his seat calmly. He didn't even glance at me during the whole process. All when I was air, I was so angry, I turned a blind eye because of him, and I couldn't calm down because of my mood.

I know what I said yesterday was too much, but I don't think what I said is completely unreasonable. I don't understand why he changed places. If he thinks this place is not good, why did he choose to go to school here in the first place? His breath was stuck in his chest.

From the second day on, I no longer went to the classroom early to wait for him, okay, if you ignore me, then I will ignore you, whoever speaks first is a coward!

But even if I made bold words, it still couldn't alleviate the irritability in my heart. One day, two days, three days, my irritability was more than one day, and I was extremely irritable and irritable when I did anything. Even my mother could see it. She asked me: "What's wrong with you recently?"

I kept stirring the rice in the bowl with chopsticks, and somehow, the words came out: "After graduation, I want to go to other places and start a company with my classmates."

My mother couldn't help but look at me strangely, her eyes seemed to say: Hey, you, are you not awake, or you have taken too much medicine.

My dad knocked the chopsticks on the table with a "snap": "Why do you have so many things? You always don't worry about it at critical moments. You think that starting a company is for eating, and the dishes will be put on the table for you to serve." The table is ready to eat!? You worry-free little bastard, let me tell you, if you do this again, get out of here!"

It seems that my dad was really angry, he didn't eat any food, and just turned his face away.

My mother was also very angry, because she just looked at my father and scolded me the whole time, and didn't say a word for me.

I am also very angry, angry at what the hell is going on in my brain, people are still in a cold war with me, besides, I have no intention of leaving at all, what the hell is this! ! !

At night, my mother came in to find me: "Son, what's the matter, tell mom"

I sat on the bed and looked at my mother's worried expression. My mood was indescribably complicated. I always let her worry about me, but she is still willing to give for me selflessly. If she knows the relationship between me and Li Xiao I don't know how long I will be sad for me, Li Xiao, I sigh in my heart, even if I am willing to stick to the agreement with him, can his heart not be affected by anything like mine?

I have no confidence, we are still in a cold war, why can he turn a blind eye to me like this? ? ?

"It's nothing, I just see that others talk about the future in a clear way. Compared with myself, I can only let my family help me solve it. I think this kind of self is really useless."

Hearing what I said, my mother smiled gratifiedly: "Mom never thought about how you would become. Mom, I just hope you can be safe and happy. I know my son. You have a soft heart." Heart, mother thinks that is more important than anything else, understand?"

I lowered my head and felt my nose was sore. It's nice to have a mother.

I wonder if Li Xiao wants to go back because he misses his mother. After all, it is the place where he and his mother lived together, but Li Xiao, forgive me for not being with you although I understand you. I have been hiding in the wings of the family and being perfectly protected. The craziest thing I did was probably falling in love with you. I want to be with you, but I was overprotected by the family and almost lost the ability to fly alone. I don't have the courage to face all kinds of pressure from life and work with you. I'm afraid that I can't do well. I'm afraid that you will hate me. I'm afraid that one day you will know that I'm just a coward with nothing to do. .

I didn't sleep well all night. Although I still couldn't bear to apologize, I was not so angry anymore. I thought, he has his own ideas about some things, and I have my own position. In his opinion, it's nothing , for me it might be Dao Kan, and he must go back, and there must be a reason for him to go back, but our attitude was not good that day, and we didn't talk about the main point at all.

I put on my clothes and went out early, I don't know if he will wait for me in the classroom, but I want to wait for him, this is my sincerity.

The lights are not turned on in the classroom, and the door is ajar. Has he come?I think.

Pushing open the door, I looked at Li Xiao's place at first glance. There was no one there, and I was a little disappointed, but before I could react, someone grabbed my hand and pulled me into the classroom. Li Xiao hugged me , we leaned against the back of the door together.

"I'm sorry" was Li Xiao, his hot breath hit my ear, making my ear hammer instantly red: "I shouldn't just walk away like that, I'm sorry"

He was apologizing to me, his voice trembling.

I hugged him back with both hands, and sincerely apologized to him, "I'm sorry, I have a bad attitude, I just... didn't expect you to leave"

In the empty classroom, we didn't say anything more, we hugged each other, embraced and kissed each other, as if this was the only way to express our dependence and apology to each other. After four days of cold war, we settled down again.

In fact, that question still exists. Li Xiao didn’t say where he would go after graduation, and I never asked him. We avoided this topic, probably because it wasn’t too imminent.

The fourth school year has finally started. I heard others say that the head teacher wanted to introduce Li Xiao to the foreign exchange bureau. It was the head teacher's own relationship, but Li Xiao refused. Li Xiao didn't tell me these things. Since he didn't tell me, I naturally wouldn't ask him. In fact, I have some bottom line in my heart. If Li Xiao decides to leave after graduation, then this job is meaningless. There is no need for him to owe this favor.

I still have a little bit of unhappiness in my heart, but I don't want to show it. I don't want to quarrel with Li Xiao because of this, because I know it's meaningless. Li Xiao has his own decision, and I can't shake him. I can only accept it. It is the only way we can go on for a long time.

Li Xiao was hired by an accounting firm. This firm has a large scale. Our school sends interns there every year, but very few can stay. I heard that they just want to recruit some cheap labor. There is a shortage of people, and there are many college students who want to enter their firm. Those of us who are technical secondary school students simply look down on them.

In fact, Li Xiao had participated in an interview with a bank before, and he passed the written test. The other party had told him to take the retest, but he didn't. He said that the firm could learn more about what he wanted to know.

I wanted to do an internship with Li Xiao in a company, but damn it, I didn't pass the interview at all. Although I was depressed, I could only accept the reality. Finally, after many interviews, I joined an agency bookkeeping company. I can't be in the same unit as Li Xiao. I don't care about other places. Anyway, my mother will take care of my job after graduation. This company called me first, so I went.

To be honest, when I was in school, I couldn’t imagine what I was going to do at work. Before going to work, my mother always told me: “Be diligent, talk less, do more, and don’t ask others to say the same thing twice. , do you know?"

Because of hearing this, the first few days when I went to work, the strings in my heart were still tight, for fear that I would make mistakes and cause trouble for others.

Li Xiao and I haven’t seen each other since the internship. We just send text messages every day, and we share some things about work. His office is really busy, and there are many things he comes into contact with. There is a teacher who takes him, but That person didn't teach him much, whether he was busy and didn't have time or didn't want to teach at all. Li Xiao said that this is society, and he was mentally prepared to handle it. He said he missed me very much, and said that his first job in life The salary must be used with me.

I said, I'll wait for you.