Dawn Redemption

Not if you love him.

Not ashamed of what he has imposed upon himself.

Because when you can't get his love, getting physical contact is also a kind of self-deceiving satisfaction.

Not only is it difficult to feel disgusted with the other party, but in retrospect, there is a kind of luck after a long time of greed.

Yes, it was a fluke.

Since it is impossible to get it, I have to be paralyzed by the ecstasy of that night again and again.

Finn turned the office doorknob.

I don't know how many times I stepped into this well-decorated and well-organized room.I don't know how many times I have seen the scene of the man in front of me working hard.An indescribably familiar feeling.Even the faint light of the morning sun passed through the glass windows and illuminated a sparse area on the floor along the track of the past.

"Good morning, sir." Finn stood still.It was amazing that his voice today did not tremble in the slightest, even though he had to accept the fact that he was powerless to refute.The man in front of him unintentionally won a place in his heart that he couldn't take away.

"Good morning, Lieutenant Finn." Noah said without raising his head.Knowing that he was just concentrating on the work at hand as usual, Finn desperately longed for him to take a look at him at this time.

One glance is enough.

To prove that he is not a discarded toy.

"Sir..." Seeing that he didn't move, Fein took a deep breath and said, "I..."

"Huh?" Noah's eyes still did not leave the paper in his hand, but the second half of the sentence that Finn had no confidence in, or even he hadn't prepared at all, was blocked back by this interruption. "I... I went to camp, if nothing else."

He didn't even notice it, and when he said this, his eyes dimmed.And Noah, who was only concentrating on his work, would never notice that his adjutant's clenched fist trembled slightly when he spoke.

He couldn't wait for Noah's answer, so he felt an uncontrollable impulse, so he turned around and walked out abruptly.

"Lieutenant Fein." Noah thought behind his back with an unrecognizable emotional voice.Fein only felt that the "Lieutenant" was harsh at this time, "I feel that your work has been a little relaxed recently, I don't know if you are not very accustomed to the new work form, or there are other things affecting you. "

Finn stubbornly refused to turn his head to his officer. This was probably the first time, but his intuition was very clear. He felt that Noah had raised his head and stared at his back.

"I don't know what you're thinking, but I don't think a qualified soldier should bring his emotions into his job." He paused, "You know, that's not my intention."

"Okay." Fein lowered his eyes, smiled and walked out of the office.

That kind of smile was piercingly cold, carrying a deep coldness.It wasn't until he turned around the porch that he almost couldn't stand still and was about to fall, that Fein's pale face showed a bitterness of pain.

I know, of course that wasn't your intention.

He staggered down the stairs in front of the door, grabbed the jacket on his chest with his fingers, and panted heavily as if he was suffocating, but even so, it was still difficult to reduce the throbbing pain in his heart.

The footsteps didn't know which direction they were going to drag him, but they just moved slowly like a walking corpse.

Obviously everything is your fault.

Finn turned around a corner of the house, staggered and almost fell, and simply supported the wall, leaning his whole heavy body against the wall.

What to pretend to be high-sounding.How to pretend to be sanctimonious.Maybe I just want to use this kind of behavior to make myself forget those things, maybe I can continue to work in the original way of getting along?After all, all he valued was work, wasn't he?

Finn sneered, his nails sinking deeply into his clenched palms.

Obviously, I have gained enough, and I will never be as frightened as before, hiding myself forever under a cold mask.With him as his backing, he no longer has to bear such a heavy burden.

He is already so kind to himself, I can see him every day, stand by his side, and do everything I can to help him.

How can you force something like this!It was my fault that I felt for him!

Yes, Finn Yannick, it was your fault.How dare you expect that he, who is also a man, will always be responsible for himself because of that possession?Reality always slaps people loudly in the face, just to punish some people who persist in not believing in its cruelty.It's time to wake up, Jonas's ending is absolutely impossible to happen to him!It's sadly delusional to even think about it.

This is a sin, how can you pull him to become a sinner together.

Such a cruel reality should be his own salvation...

But if you can't do it, you can't do it.

Noah rescued him from the abyss of humbleness. From that day on, he was finally awakened by others. To live like a human being, he was no different from others.

However, he immediately deprived himself of the right to selfishly have feelings as a human being.

In the end, you ruined me.Noah von Seifert.

The author has something to say:

If there is time after the meeting, I will come back for the second update