Dawn Redemption

It's one thing to promise, it's another to deliver the letter by hand.

There were not even mailboxes near the concentration camp.Fein didn't take a car, and didn't find someone to borrow a bicycle, so he walked a few kilometers to the nearby post office abruptly.

On the way there, as if afraid of losing it, I took out the letter from time to time to have a look.It has only been a few hours since he got this letter, and all the contents above have been firmly memorized by him.He even knows where Noah wrote a continuous stroke and where there is an ink dot.

He even hoped that he would have the courage to tear this thing up suddenly, throw it into any garbage bin on the side of the road, wait for the garbage truck to take it away and burn it in the garbage factory, turning it into a pile of ashes or sticky pulp.But he didn't, he wasn't as impulsive or irritable as he imagined, on the contrary, he was unusually calm on the way to the post office.

That's why he chose to walk to the post office on foot.The slow pace seems to be able to make him calmer, but from now on, it seems that it is not necessary.

He remembered that sometimes in order to appease the prisoners and prevent them from getting too nervous, they would send out letters or postcards for them to fill in.This seems to be the only chance for them to get in touch with their family members in the outside world. Fein once watched them fill in the names and addresses of their family members with a smile and excitement, and was so excited that the hand holding the pen trembled. non-stop.

Finn stood at the door of the barracks, watching with lowered eyes as they happily piled up all the words they wanted to write on that small postcard or letter paper, almost filling up all the space, but they were still dissatisfied.Some people even worked up the courage to ask for another one.

When looking at them, the more cheerful the atmosphere in the barracks was, on the contrary, the heavier Fein's heart was, and he even turned his head away or simply walked out of the room to prevent himself from seeing all this.

Maybe it's because he has been imprisoned in such a depressing place for a long time. He has always been cautious and treated roughly, and he doesn't think too much about the welfare he finally got.

Or they don't want to think about it more.However, in fact, the secrets of the concentration camp were completely sealed off from the outside world, and these prisoners had personally experienced almost everything at the bottom of the concentration camp, so how could it be possible for them to pass on the news unimpeded like this.

Therefore, this is just a means to appease their emotions. No one, no matter whether it is a soldier, a prisoner guard or a special task force, no one has the leisure time to check one by one among so many pieces of paper.At that time, Finn was standing beside the newly dug deep pit, his face glowed red by the firelight.The fire was so fierce that those standing there would not dare to stay because it was too hot, but the fire still couldn't melt those eyes that were as hard as ice.

He watched impassively as the task force pushed the cart full of papers to the fire pit and dumped the contents into it.Finn watched the letters and postcards full of handwriting, scattered like goose feathers and snow, and turned to ashes as soon as they touched the dancing flames.

After thinking about it, this is not worth feeling at all.Even human life is so fragile here, not to mention those flimsy, powerless pieces of paper.

He would have liked to just drop the letter in the mailbox outside the door and walk away.But he can't.He still walked into the post office, handed over the letter to the staff, and completed the formalities of registered mail.Of course he was in a bad mood, and he only said a few brief words from beginning to end.

But his cold expression always made people feel a little timid. The staff didn't dare to neglect him, and they didn't dare to provoke him because of his military rank, so they helped him go through the formalities swiftly.

Fein didn't stay long either, he turned around and left the post office after seeing that everything was done, and returned to the concentration camp along the same route.

He had never called this place home, no one would want to live in a place like this.Only because he has some friends and Noah is here, he can settle down and live here temporarily.

But now, even now that he hadn't left, stopping at the gate of the concentration camp, Finn looked up at all this.To him, the gray walls, barbed wire fences that seem to have no boundaries, and numerous sentry towers are like a gray city without color and sunshine, so strange.

The sky has gradually begun to darken, and it is even darker than the daytime. The thick clouds in the sky are surging one after another, like cascading waves, rolling in.Standing under this sky gives people a sense of powerlessness that is about to be swallowed up, but cannot escape.

He didn't know where to go.It feels a little early to go back to Noah's place for dinner, and he's not hungry at all.No, it's not that I'm not hungry, it's just that the esophagus seems to be blocked, and I feel like I can't swallow anything.

When he returned to the dormitory, he didn't know how to explain it to the group of people. After all, he couldn't confess his relationship with Noah in front of other people.

My heart was in a mess, and I could only circle around the camp.The sound of footsteps on the gravel

I don't know if it's deliberate or has a rhythm, but it will continue to maintain this frequency the moment I notice it.

Finn heard a whistle, which was really not pleasant, but the tune was familiar to him.But before he could react, he heard the whistle stop, and a hearty shout came from above his head: "Fin!"

He raised his head following the sound, and saw Jonas' head and the row of shiny white teeth exposed on the sentry tower: "My God, I actually saw that you were distracted. Finally, you caught me distracted. Didn't you Are you here to check the sentry? Where are you going?"

It was quite difficult to speak through such a high sentry tower, Finn raised his head and could only raise his voice and said, "I don't want to go anywhere, just stroll around."

"If you have nowhere to go, come up and sit for a while. I don't have anyone to talk to, so it's boring." Jonas put one arm on the edge of the guardrail, looking very leisurely.Normally speaking, Finn is not the best person to chat with, but Jonas doesn't seem to care.

Finn happened to have nowhere to go, so he nodded slightly, walked to the watchtower, wiped the sweat from his palms, and climbed up the wooden ladder.

Jonas was alone on the tower, no wonder he was bored.Seeing Finn coming up, Jonas seemed to remember something, and quickly put out the cigarette in his hand on the ground.

There was no place to sit on the sentry tower, but there were a few small benches there, which they probably brought up by themselves.Finn glanced at Jonas and sat down slowly beside him.

"Are you in a bad mood?" Jonas has always been more sensitive to other people's emotional changes.Finn didn't want to hide it from him either, so he nodded, "It's more complicated to explain... I wanted to go back tonight and tell you guys."

He was very afraid that Jonas would show some extreme emotions after he finished speaking, such as excessive surprise, or strong dissatisfaction, because he didn't know and he didn't have the mood to appease his emotions, and it would make himself very embarrassed.But during his explanation, and after he finished speaking, Jonas's reaction was much calmer than he imagined.

He just sighed lightly and patted Finn on the shoulder.When Finn looked up and saw the extremely sad expression on Jonas's face, he sniffed his nose lightly and said softly, "I'm fine."

Jonas could tell if he was alright, glanced at his mouth, looked at the wooden boards under his feet, and suddenly found that the wooden boards were not as tight as he thought before, and through the gaps in between, he could see several meters of gravel ground.

"Actually...it's not as painful as you think." Jonas pretended to be casual and said, in fact, he didn't want to make Finn's heart feel heavier. You can make a phone call. With the relationship between the two of you, what are you worried about? He won't talk to others..."

"What are you thinking?" Finn interrupted Jonas angrily and amusedly, judging from his appearance, he must feel that he was worried that Noah would find another new love or something, "If you really only need to worry about this .Jonas, I feel shameless now. I huddled in a safe place like a tortoise, protected by him, knowing that he would also be hurt, but I could only watch!"

"That's what he arranged..." Jonas stretched out his hand in a panic, but he took a step too late, not stopping Finn's fist from hitting his own knee hard.

"Of course I know!" Finn said loudly, realizing that he couldn't get angry with Jonas, his voice restrained a little, "I'm just not reconciled! Why must I be regarded as the weak side in life? I him Damn, he's also a man! I too... I want to protect the people I care about too! But I can't do anything!"

He punched down again, this time caught by Jonas' palm.He grinned and shook his painful hand: "You are also ruthless enough to punch yourself. You can't force this kind of thing. Even if you stay here, when the day comes, you can do it for him." What? Help him block a shuttle of bullets? Stop kidding!"

Jonas stood up and put his hands solemnly on Finn's shoulders. Only then would Finn believe that he was indeed seven or eight years older than himself: "Listen to me, Finn. If you think you can't do it for him If anything, listen to his arrangements, do your own thing, protect yourself, and don't let him worry about it. Wait."

He took two steps and poked his head out of the sentry tower, and whistled down: "Hey! Hannuo, today is really on time." He turned his back and put his gun on his back and said to Finn: "Let's go down, the change of guard is here. Now, if you don’t know where to go, I’ll accompany you around the camp.”

"Yeah." Finn stood up and went down the ladder.

"Hi, sir!" Seeing Hanno's flurry of salutes, he obviously didn't expect that there was another person on the sentry tower besides Jonas.

Fein replied: "Thanks for your hard work." Watching Jonas climb to the last few steps and jump down, he said to him: "Let's go."

The two walked side by side in the middle of the dark barracks. The tall and dark buildings on the side were under the hazy sky, oppressive as if they were slowly approaching, and finally squeezed the two people who couldn't escape to death in the middle like burning garbage.

"If you find it hard to explain in the dormitory, I'll talk about it later." Jonas put his hands in his jacket pocket. "Some things are unnecessary—" Finn said hastily.

"I know. I promised you." Jonas said.Although this person usually feels like a talkative who will never get tired, his promise is very reassuring, "I am the same person as you, and I know what to say and what not to say. Although I don't believe Marcus and the others will betray us, but it’s not a bad thing to have a long-term mind.”

Finn kicked a small stone on the ground, but it didn't fly out in an arc as he expected, but just rolled on the ground for a short distance before stopping on the side of the road: "You will have such a Do you feel? Just because the person you like is of the same sex, you will feel... We are different from them. Because of this, others will look at you differently. Walking on the road, it seems that other people know the relationship between us Same thing."

Jonas looked at the sky and thought for a while: "This kind of thing is a psychological suggestion. If you think it is, it is. If you don't take it seriously," he turned to look at Fein, "then it is not. "

"In my opinion, this is just part of the propaganda." Fein pondered and said, "Because it will hinder their birth policy and hinder the reproduction of the so-called excellent race, they treat people like us as criminals. In fact, we are not guilty."

"Yes!" Jonas suddenly became excited, his eyes sparkled, "We are not guilty, we are no different from others!"

Finn shrugged helplessly: "You know why I don't want to leave. Except for Noah, I like being with you very much. I can feel that although Rolf and Marcus didn't hold back, even if They know your orientation, and they have no malice, and they will not look at you with strange eyes."

"I can understand your mood. When I knew I was going to leave Berlin," Jonas smiled self-deprecatingly, "It was worse than your mood. But now I'm used to it, and you have to get used to it slowly. .”

"Is there any trick?" Finn asked without hope.

Unexpectedly, Jonas really said immediately: "Of course. If you can't make it, just imagine the scene of reunion. Don't put too much pressure on it. The more beautiful the fantasy, the better. Simply put," he took off Hat, plucked the hair deformed by the hat and said, "It is to have hope."