fingertip quicksand

I don't know how long after, a person sat gently by the bed, and that person put Nan Jiu's hand in his hand, that hand was very rough, he patted Nan Jiu's hand as if comforting and comforting and said

"I know you don't want to talk to us"

The person who spoke was Uncle Li. At this moment, Uncle Li was the only one left in the room. There was a bit of distress in his eyes. Also, although he was not his daughter, she was almost watched by her when she was young. She looks like this now , it's only natural to feel distressed

"But you can't do it all the time."

Those words are still going on, speaking very slowly, sometimes speaking and sometimes interrupting, Nan Jiu's motionless appearance, I don't know how much I listened to

"I found someone. I thought, if you don't want to talk to us, you should still be willing to talk to her."

After the words were finished, there was indeed someone approaching, it was the familiar clean smell

Although Nan Jiu didn't look at it, she reacted extremely strongly. She climbed to the other end of the bed in an instant, and she couldn't control herself well. She staggered and fell under the bed. She didn't have time to care about the pain or not, and quickly got up and hid under the bed. corner of the edge

At this moment, she was barefoot, stepped on the ground and squatted, her head was buried under her knees, she didn't dare to look at any place, and even her body was trembling slightly. This was the first reaction since this month, intense. more painful

"Nan Jiu"

That voice was calling her softly, but she still didn't dare to raise her head, curled up in that corner, and the person who called her also squatted down, didn't touch her, just called her name again and again

over and over again

The numb heart seemed to be throbbing slightly, but it still hurts, which is really surprising

Nan Jiu raised her head slowly, stared blankly at the person in front of her, and saw Bai Bai's lips pursed and calling her there, at that moment Nan Jiu thought she would cry, because she really felt a sore nose

When you finally meet someone you can cry to, will the tears really come down?

But after that glance, I didn't cry, I just watched, almost greedily

Then a smile appeared on the corner of his mouth, was it a wry smile?Or laugh?or neither

It was a comforting smile, as if to say, I'm fine, you don't have to worry

When Bai Bai saw this smile, his heart seemed to be hit hard, he couldn't breathe, he felt like he was about to drown

Why does this person still behave like this in this situation, and take into account the other person's feelings, won't she be in pain?Won't it be uncomfortable?Why don't you cry, isn't it good to cry?why are you so stubborn

At that second, after that smile, Bai Bai suddenly realized how ridiculous his previous acts of revenge were, for such a girl, such a pitifully stupid girl

Perhaps it was because Bai Bai's expression was too obvious, Nan Jiu seemed to see it, and she spit out the first sentence since this month

"Are you pity me?"

sure, no doubt, just stating the fact

But Bai Bai is indeed feeling sorry for her, besides being pitiful, there is also a trace of guilt, a trace of indescribable guilt

"Fortunately, there are still people who will pity me"

The sense of desolation brought out by those words made people feel tense, Bai Bai didn't know what to say to comfort her, as if no matter what he said was wrong, he could only look at her like that

Nan Jiu's eyes didn't dodge, and they were no longer empty, but the blankness still hasn't been erased, it seems to exist in the corner, and it can't be lingered no matter what

Nan Jiu hugged Bai Bai who was squatting in front of her. Bai Bai was hit by the sudden hug and sat on the ground, but he didn't push her away, but stretched out his arms and hugged her, Gently and slowly patting her back

Careful, afraid that too much force will smash it, the ease of movement is almost non-existent, but it is real

It was also those movements that made Nan Jiu curl up in this embrace with peace of mind. There was no expected warmth in the embrace, it was wet and cold.

Is it because my heart can't cover the heat anymore?Because it can't get hot anymore, no matter where you stay, you will feel cold and cold

It seemed to be raining outside, there was a rustling sound, Bai Bai's whole body was wet at the moment, could it be that she was drenched all the way, so she was anxious, so anxious to run all the way?

It was like that at the time, no matter whether it was self-indulgent in the end or not, it should be like this at this moment, so that you can have a little hope, so you won't be so desperate

Nan Jiu thought about her anxieties about herself and those pitiful things, how about living?

It doesn't matter if you are anxious or pitiful, it's good to be pitiful, it's not bad, just enjoy the last pity about her selfishly

And after that, Nan Jiu would sometimes say something like this

"Can you pity me a little more"

more, more

Bai Bai didn't quite understand, he always laughed it off, and then said

"Shouldn't I love you, why did I become pitiful?"

During this conversation, three years have passed, and the scars from the past are no longer so deep, so Bai Bai also began to forget, the first conversations, so after many years, he will talk about the topic. Made it so easy 'cause time really can dilute some things

"You won't love me again"

This was a joke, but the sadness under the joke was so obvious, Bai Bai's body paused for a while, and he didn't say anything

I don't know if it's because of Nan Jiu's thoughtfulness, or because she just said something casually, so this topic was quickly exposed, and such a topic only appeared once, and it didn't appear again after that, like a taboo yes, dare not touch again

For three years, Bai Bai has been by Nan Jiu's side. During this period, there were too many reasons, or guilt, because she could have stopped it at the time, maybe there was more than guilt, it was a very chaotic relationship

"Actually, at that time, I could have prevented that from happening."

Bai Bai muttered this sentence to himself, it was the first time Bai Bai mentioned that matter

And Nan Jiu didn't know if she understood, because what she said was endless and abrupt.

And Nan Jiu didn't ask about this sentence, but just nodded and smiled, it seems that she didn't understand it, and Bai Bai didn't explain it anymore, or maybe she couldn't explain it.

But what Bai Bai didn't know was that Nan Jiu understood, and understood very well, humblely understood, ridiculously understood

Nan Jiu pointed at the bus in front, looking very excited

"Is that the car?"

This time out to play, Nan Jiu did not ask Uncle Li to see him off, but followed Bai Bai. At first, he planned to take a taxi. It may be the rush hour or other reasons. Anyway, he did not stop the car along the way. Under the circumstances, Bai Bai proposed to take the bus, and Nan Jiu readily agreed.

Judging from Nan Jiu's expression at this moment, it seems that she is still vaguely looking forward to it. Seeing her reaction like this, Bai Bai just shook his head dumbfounded.

Although there are many people getting on the bus, the order is not chaotic. Everyone lined up to get on the bus one by one.

Bai Bai walked in front of Nan Jiu, with a calm expression on his face, but Nan Jiu, on the contrary, was always looking around, looking at the people who went up one after another, or put coins or swiped cards

The card reader beeped from time to time, and Nan Jiu became distressed secretly. She didn't have the card, so she rummaged through her bag anxiously, feeling a little flustered for a while.

Because it will be her turn soon, but fortunately things are going well, and the money is quickly taken out

And during this process, Bai Bai didn't even look back at her, he just swiped his card calmly, and then walked inside, but he looked back at her uneasy.

Turning around, I saw Nan Jiu throwing the red banknote in his hand into it. Before he could stop it, the money fell into it with a swipe.

Seeing that she looked strange, Nan Jiu asked

"what happened?"

Bai Bai looked at her and wanted to say something, but seeing that it was not good for her to block the door, he pulled her inside and said while pulling her

"Your money is enough for you to do it fifty times, what's the matter, don't be so stupid next time"

Of course, this sentence was just a joke, but it was also very serious. Unfortunately, Nan Jiu didn't listen to it, because when she took the bus again later, although she didn't put coins like this again, she did another one. stupid thing

Nan Jiu looked at the people behind thoughtfully, and indeed found that they all voted in small change. At first, she didn't know how much money was appropriate to invest, and she didn't think too much because she was too hasty

"That's your fault, you didn't remind me"

There were no seats around, so that everyone got on the bus and it became a bit crowded. Bai Bai found a suitable place to stand firmly, and Nan Jiu followed her and stood beside her, but Nan Jiu wobbled seems to be unstable

From time to time, he would stagger forward or backward, causing Bai Bai to always pay attention to her and help her

After a long time, I felt a little troublesome, so I simply pulled her to a place very close to me, and protected her in front of me, so that she would not be thrown out, killing two birds with one stone

"It's not that I didn't remind you, it's because you are stupid. Didn't you notice that I swiped the card twice? You still go to insert coins yourself. Why, I'm afraid that others will not know that you have money."

Bai Bai said this jokingly, but Nan Jiu stayed quietly in Bai Bai's arms, so quiet that it made people feel strange.

"Why didn't you speak?"

Nan Jiu raised her head slightly, just in time to meet Bai Bai's eyes, one lowered her head, the other raised her head slightly

"Then you have to pay me"

Bai Bai frowned slightly, puzzled

"what?"

"It's all your fault, so you have to pay me"

Bai Bai smiled

"Then how do you want me to pay?"

Nan Jiu seemed to hesitate for a moment, a gleam of brilliance flashed in her eyes

"Since you can sit fifty times, then you have to sit with me for fifty times"

This request seems to be too simple, Bai Bai nodded his head almost without any hesitation, but after nodding, he felt a little funny

"It's that simple"

Nan Jiu lowered her slightly raised head, and gently attached her head to her chest. Feeling the warmth brought by this embrace and the unique fragrance of her bath, she hummed softly.

It's just so simple, very simple, simple companionship and simple guardianship, that's all