double rebirth

When Ren woke up, he only felt sore around his eyes, and his body was very heavy. He stared at the ceiling for several minutes before he recovered a little.

He seemed to have had a long dream, including Shen Zequn.

Thinking of this name, Ren Qing's body trembled violently, and he sat up all of a sudden.He hurriedly lifted the quilt to take a look. He was wearing house clothes and still smelled of body wash.

Isn't it a dream?Is Shen Zequn really here?

Ren Qing recalled it carefully, vaguely, he remembered that Shen Zequn seemed to really help him take a bath yesterday, they seemed to have kissed, and said a lot, but he couldn't remember what they said specifically.

Ren Qing's complexion became very ugly at this moment, he couldn't help but knocked his head hard, but he didn't feel any discomfort under his body, he didn't do anything with Shen Zequn.

Ren Qing looked around subconsciously, and there was no Shen Zequn's clothes on the hanger.Ren Qing hurriedly got out of bed, her head still a little dazed.

He opened the door of the bedroom, and Shen Zequn was sitting on the sofa, neatly dressed.

"you're awake?"

Seeing Shen Zequn turned around, Ren Qing poked his neck and nodded, but when he saw Shen Zequn's pale face clearly, he was really shocked.

"Are you OK?"

Shen Zequn just smiled: "It's okay, I ordered porridge and put it on the dining table, you remember to eat it later."

Seeing him like this, Ren Qing guessed that Shen Zequn must have a stomach problem. He remembered that Liu Chuan had commonly used stomach medicine at home, so he opened the cabinet under the TV series and found it: "Eat this."

"Thank you."

Shen Zequn seemed to be in severe pain, so he took two pills and swallowed them.After Ren Qing finished washing, Shen Zequn was already sitting at the dining table.

Ren Qing walked over, and then asked: "It was so late yesterday...how did you come here?"

Shen Zequn looked at him and said: "Just passing by, I see Liu Chuan helped you up, I was a little worried, so I came up to have a look, you did drink a lot, next time...don't drink so much."

Ren Qing admitted that he drank a little too much, mainly because he was very busy recently, and his heart was in a mess, so he forgot his drinking capacity for a while.I didn't think much of it at first, but the aftertaste of the red wine was indeed a bit strong. When I entered the house, I was able to stay awake, but I only worked on the sofa for a while, and when I got up, my world began to spin.

Shen Zequn looked at how Ren Qing was drinking porridge silently with his head down, and couldn't help wanting to touch him, but he suddenly remembered what Ren Qing said last night, and Shen Zequn's hand that had just been raised dropped powerlessly.

"Ren Qing..."

Hearing Shen Zequn calling him, Ren Qing couldn't help raising his head, Shen Zequn looked at his slightly swollen eyes, and finally sighed: "I know I annoy you... You piled up those things in the cabinet Li, I saw it when I was looking for clothes for you yesterday."

Ren Qing was a little confused, and he only had a vague impression of what he said yesterday, but now it seems that it is not a good word.

As if digging a hole in his heart with his own hands, Shen Zequn's body arched slightly in pain: "I won't give those things away, you...I just want you to live well, live well, Don't feel so embarrassed and painful because of me, I don't want to bring this to you. You said that there are too many deceptions and suspicions between us and we can't go back to the past. In fact, I thought a lot this night. It's hard for me to imagine big sister After telling you that I actually have a marriage contract, how uncomfortable you must be, I obviously had so many opportunities to explain to you, please forgive me, but I missed them all, you should hate me very much."

Yesterday... what did he say?

Ren Qing's mind went blank, he just looked at the despair on Shen Zequn's face, for some reason, he suddenly remembered that the first time he saw Shen Zequn, even in the noisy crowd, Shen Zequn was still so dazzling, making people take a look I can no longer look away.

How did Shen Zequn become like this?

What went wrong with his liking with Shen Zequn?

If Shen Zequn could explain to him earlier instead of avoiding like this, if he could express his worries at that time and not run around, even if it was irrelevant after an explosive quarrel, they would not be like this kind of ending.

So he couldn't put all the faults on Shen Zequn and clean himself up.

These days, he has seen too many expressions of Shen Zequn showing pain. Until now, as long as he thinks of Shen Zequn's begging and tears that day, he feels that he is going to be out of breath.

As for Shen Zequn's appearance at the moment, the earth also has a lot to do with what he said yesterday.

Shen Zequn would also lose control because of his words and deeds, which he never dared to think about before.

But he didn't like this taste.

For the first time, Ren Qing tried to say to Shen Zequn: "Actually, I fell in love with you at first sight."

Shen Zequn was startled, raised his head and looked at Ren Qing with disbelief in his eyes.

Recalling the previous events, the emotion in Ren Qing's eyes became unreal: "You are very gentle, but you have the attitude of a natural superior. If you didn't take the initiative to help me, I'm afraid I won't be here for the rest of my life." There will be a chance to meet you. When I like you... I am actually very contradictory. On the one hand, I will be proud because I like such an excellent you, and on the other hand, I will feel inferior because of the big difference between me and you .So that year I tried my best to work hard, and I thought that at least when I no longer owed you, I would be qualified to say I like you."

It was also the first time for Shen Zequn to hear this from Ren Qing, and he didn't know what to say for a while, so he could only look at Ren Qing in a daze.

Ren Qing said again: "When I confessed to you, you wouldn't know how much courage I used. I bet everything on it, although to you, it may seem really simple. So I was When I refused, I really didn't know what to do. I didn't know what went wrong. I thought you liked me and that's why you treated me so well, but after being rejected by you, I'm not sure .”

Speaking of this, Ren Qing still felt heartbroken: "After that...you didn't come back for a long time, I knew your heart, and then I met your friend once, and I heard about you by accident I like Lin Li. At that time, your sister just came to me again and said that you actually had a marriage contract. I naturally felt that you were just supporting me and would leave sooner or later. I also knew that I should leave, but people are always used to avoiding , I like you and loathe myself at the same time, so I can only go to other places to work. I actually thought about having a good talk with you when you celebrated your birthday. , My mind was blank at the time, and I left without even thinking about it. I was drunk alone, and I felt that I was a joke from the beginning to the end. That feeling of self-esteem being underfoot, don’t you I will understand."

"Don't...don't say..."

Ren Qing felt that this was the first time he said these words, and it must be the last time, so he shook his head, he wanted to say what was in his heart once and for all: "Become Ren Han who is with you again When we were together, I really hated you, so I always resisted you. Until you told me that day that you didn't like Lin Li, but me..." Ren Qing looked at him: "Shen Zequn, when did you Like me? After I die?"

"No..." Shen Zequn hugged his head with his hands in pain: "I don't know when I liked you, but when I was listening to you sing that song, I suddenly realized that I was wrong. Yes, and then you confessed to me, I feel I can't accept it, just explain to you again, before asking for your forgiveness. I was very confused, I met my mother once. I understood the mistake I made, and realized that I But after going back... you changed. I became scared, I felt like you were like quicksand, the more I wanted to hold on to you, the more I couldn't hold you. It was also because of my evasion that you would ...I wanted to start over with you, but I never thought about whether you still need a poor man like me to spend the rest of your life with."

Shen Zequn wiped his face: "Ren Qing, I'm not as good as you think, I'm not good enough for you. I'm looking for Ren Han because you are so similar, I can't control myself to get close, but I also know you Already... But it was so hopeless, those two years were like an endless nightmare to me, when I thought that I would never be able to be with you for such a long life, I wanted to kill myself But just when I felt that I couldn't hold on any longer, I met Ren Han. The more we got along after that, the more I felt like you two, so I lost control and had a relationship with you."

Shen Zequn smiled wryly, and his eyes were a little blurred: "I don't know whether it's God pitying me or punishing me. I finally got you, but I also lost you completely. You...you don't like me anymore."

Shen Zequn didn't dare to say any more, he was afraid that he would lose control and do something more terrible, and he would want to just ignore everything...as long as he could keep this person by his side.

But when Ren Qing heard Shen Zequn's words, he felt mixed feelings in his heart.

Does he really dislike Shen Zequn?

After all, he was someone he liked so much, and he was in control of all his joys, anger, sorrows and joys. He really couldn't forget this person completely, on the contrary, he would never forget it.

He still liked Shen Zequn, but he didn't dare to like him any more.

He was tired and scared, and he just wanted to put all these good and bad things in his heart.He just subconsciously felt that if he was with this person again, there would only be helplessness and suffering waiting for him.

Facing those unknowns, he didn't have the confidence to accept them, nor did he have the confidence to re-establish a new relationship with Shen Zequn.

He really didn't make much progress, he still just wanted to escape, to escape everything about Shen Zequn.

Shen Zequn felt that if he didn't leave, his emotions would be completely out of control. He rubbed his face, stood up slowly, and said, "Next Wednesday is your birthday, let's have dinner at the end."

"at last?"

Shen Zequn nodded: "Yes, Ren Qing, don't you remember what you said yesterday?"

Ren Qing's heart sank: "What did I say?"

"You said you don't like me pestering you, you said that it would be better if I never came back, I'm really afraid of you, I admit defeat, I won't pester you anymore, so don't say that kind of thing again. "

Ren Qing already understood in his heart why Shen Zequn was like this, he only felt his face was slightly hot, and said in a low voice: "I was drunk yesterday, so I don't want to live, I still have to sing well. Although you haven't Appeared, but the ones given away...someone in the company is gossiping, I don't like that, I feel my mind is messed up, I just want to calm down and think about the future."

Shen Zequn looked at Ren Qing's dazed look, and couldn't help but patted his cheek: "Ren Qing, I'm just very scared, afraid that if I don't bother you anymore, you will forget me or fall in love with someone else."

Ren Qing really didn't expect Shen Zequn to ask such a question, and couldn't answer for a while.

Shen Zequn didn't ask any more questions, he knew that Ren Qing couldn't answer.

In the end, Shen Zequn just lowered his head and kissed the top of his head, and said, "I came to pick you up on your birthday. I have something...I wanted to give it to you at that time, but I couldn't send it out."