There is a kind of love you know

The sun shines through the floor-to-ceiling windows in the house, casting soft sunlight.The clear and crisp chirping of birds called the sleeping person far away, as if telling the arrival of a new day.

The two lying on the bed were close to each other, sleeping in each other's arms, everything looked so harmonious.

Slowly opening his eyes, Xu Luyan couldn't help showing a smile as he looked at the sleeping person in his arms.

I stretched out my hand to stroke the eyebrows of the other party, I just thought it was pretty, and I was a little greedy for the temperature in the quilt room, but I still had to get up.

I'm really reluctant, Xu Luyan thought lightly, kissed the boy's forehead, and got up quietly, for fear of waking him up.

Xu Luyan went into the bathroom to take a shower, completely unaware that the boy on the bed had woken up early, and just kept pretending to be asleep.

I stood up, and there was a slight pain between my legs, but I didn't dare to go down to see the unbearable pain between my legs, I just clamped my legs and sat on the bed.

Fortunately, after the incident last night, Xu Luyan helped me take a bath, otherwise some kind of liquid might flow out.

I turned my head and looked at the blue sky outside the window. I was stunned for a moment, but I looked away, feeling that the blue was too... dazzling.

The way I behaved last night was really mean. This was the first thought I had when I was clear-headed. Now I just feel that some things don't matter, and they have deteriorated.

Why did I become like this?I hugged my knees, thinking a little bit suspiciously, my heart was completely empty.

Coming out of the bathroom, Xu Luyan, who was wiping his head with a towel, frowned slightly when he saw the young man sitting there insecure.

When he came to the side of the young man, Xu Luyan felt a little pain in his heart when he saw the pale look in those eyes.

I noticed Xu Luyan standing aside, looking up at him, showing a faint smile, "Good morning."

It was only when I made a sound that I realized that it was very hoarse, probably because I yelled too much last night.

Xu Luyan looked a little gloomy, came to sit beside me, took me into his arms, and interlocked my fingers.

"Are you okay?" Xu Luyan asked me carefully.

I shook my head.

"Xu Luyan...can you..." I wanted him to let me out, but I didn't know how to say that.

"What?" Xu Luyan looked at the boy in his arms and frowned, and his expression changed a little according to what the boy said.

I looked up at him, fell silent for a moment, and said, "I want to go out and come to a store, so..."

Xu Luyan probably understood what the other party was worried about. Maybe the boy's behavior last night was also for this matter. Inexplicably, he had mixed feelings in his heart.

"I can let you go out to open a shop, but you have to come back before seven o'clock every day." Xu Luyan knew that it was not a long-term solution to tie the other party to Xu's house, and he wanted the other party to accept him.It's just that he was a little worried about the person in front of him, and he was really afraid that he would accidentally lose him.

"Really?" I was a little happy, I didn't expect Xu Luyan to agree to me, or I was wrong, thinking that Bao Yang was staying at Xu's house all the time, not letting me go out.

"Yeah." Xu Luyan looked at the smile of the person in front of him, and felt that he had said so before.

"Then... can I go out today?" I asked expectantly, completely forgetting the pain in my body.

Xu Luyan frowned, looking down at the hickey marks on the other person's body, feeling helpless.

"Not today, stay at home for a few more days."

"Why?" I raised my head and asked him with some puzzlement. The days in Xu's house had made me feel too uncomfortable, and I wanted to go outside.

Xu Luyan really felt that the other party was sometimes too smart and sometimes too stupid, but he liked the other party no matter what.

Maybe all his patience will only be reserved for the person in front of him.

"You got out of bed now?"

Xu Luyan's words made me blush.

"I...then...wait for a few more days..." I whispered and lowered my head.

"You..." Xu Luyan squeezed my hand lovingly, and smiled helplessly.

I didn't tell him, I was not shy, but thinking about what happened last night, I felt very uncomfortable, as if I was pressed by a stone.

Am I pretending too much?

I closed my eyes and didn't want to think about it any more.

"Have a good rest at home today, I'll be back tonight." Xu Luyan patted my head, got up and went to the closet to get some clothes to wear.

I looked at his back and thought it would be good if all of this was just a dream. I hope that everything is a dream.

"What's wrong?" Seeing the young man looking at him, Xu Luyan asked gently.

I smiled and shook my head, "It's okay, I just think you look good in this blue shirt."

"Really..." Hearing what the other party said, Xu Luyan also felt that he looked better in this outfit.

When he came to the boy, he kissed him on the cheek and said with some nostalgia, "Wait for me to come back."

I smiled slightly, "OK."

There is a warm current in Xu Luyan's heart, this is the love he has been looking for all along, the loveless marriage in the family was a kind of torment for him, now it's all over.With the person in front of him, he won't be alone anymore.

"I'm leaving."

Xu Luyan came to the door, left these words and left.

The moment I saw the door closed, the smile on the corner of my mouth finally fell.

In fact, I don't want to laugh at all. I have long forgotten what laughter is, and I just feel that I am too fake.

Resisting the pain in my lower body, I walked to the bathroom, turned on the water heater, directed at my body, and didn't put the water in the bathtub, it was too troublesome, and I didn't have much strength.

I feel that I am quite dirty, and I keep trying to wash off the hickey marks on my body, but I can't rub them off, and on the contrary, those marks are getting deeper and deeper.

I growled, but was covered by the sound of water hitting the ground.

I couldn't tell whether the water on my face was tears or not. I folded my arms and squatted on the ground, crying with my voice suppressed.

I clearly said I wouldn't cry, why can't I do it?

why?

Since it's your own decision, shouldn't you regret it?

But why is my heart so empty?

So empty.

The sprayed water hit my back like a handful of needles, which hurt me so much.

The pain of thought and spirit made me really fall into pain, which was also accompanied by changes in personality.

What I didn't know was that I had already stepped into the bottomless abyss, and I couldn't get up again.