The world is very bitter, you are very sweet

"Don't go..."

The boy refused coldly.

Xu Li didn't ask him why he didn't go, and didn't get into the car. Instead, he held the open car door with both hands, and his tone was not too cautious, but it seemed to be joking, "Okay, I won't go... But, my child, It’s not a fun place up there, if you want to play, don’t come here, it’s not cool to sit on it, come down quickly, uncle will drive you back.”

The corner of the boy's mouth curled into a mocking smile, and he lowered his head even deeper, "I know it's not fun up there, but it's fun down here."

Below this is the abyss, the icy river.

"It's better than that damn man..."

Hearing these words, Xu Jingheng and Xu Li were at a loss.

"Then why is the damned person still alive..."

Xu Li frowned deeply, but his voice was extremely calm, "Son, what are you talking about? Is there something wrong? Don't be overwhelmed by yourself. If you have any difficulties, tell your uncle. He will see if he can help you! "

The boy shook his head with empty eyes, "You go, I will go soon."

Xu Li sighed, and said helplessly, "Son, it's not uncle who scares you... You see, with such a strong wind on the bridge, you might not be able to hold on to the railing when the wind blows. Uncle will hold you down first. You have to sit on the bridge." Sit on the ground, okay?"

The boy sat on the railing and turned his head.Under the dim street lights, Xu Jingheng couldn't see his appearance clearly, but the blood on his face was particularly glaring.

The boy's thin lips stained with blood clots slightly opened and closed, "Just like you did just now, just pretend you didn't see it, let's go..."

Xu Jingheng's eyes widened in the car, the little half of his head that was stretched out just now, was seen by that boy? !

The boy seemed to squint his eyes, and through Xu Lihe's open car door, his eyes fell on Xu Jingheng who was sitting on the co-pilot. His tone was very casual: "I've already left, why did you come back?"

Xu Jingheng's staring eyes met the boy's half-closed eyes, he was startled, his Adam's apple rolled up and down, and he said in a panic: "I... I just... saw it wrong, I didn't see that it was a person, I just turned around to take a look, I..."

The boy didn't speak, but smiled invisibly, and the corners of his mouth curled up frivolously.

Xu Jingheng forced himself to calm down, raised his voice and said to the boy: "I... don't know why you are sitting here, and I don't know what happened to you, but I still want to persuade you to come down, maybe... you didn't It’s not the only way to go.”

The boy raised his eyebrows that were sticky with blood, "Really?"

Xu Jingheng whispered: "Maybe... yes."

Xu Jingheng pressed the lock of his seat belt, opened the car door and went out.

After he went out, the boy turned his head again, looking at the silent river.

Xu Jingheng walked up to Xu Li and stood still, side by side with Xu Li, facing away from the boy.

He put his hand on the car door, and said lightly: "Don't worry, if I don't go over, don't rush."

With his back to the boy, he tilted his head slightly, and he could see a trace of the boy's back from the corner of his eye, "That...can I ask, are you still a student?"

The air was quiet for two or three seconds before I heard the boy say, "Yes."

Xu Jingheng hurriedly said: "I'm also a student, I'm going to be 17 years old this year, how about you?"

The boy snorted contemptuously and said nothing.

Xu Jingheng didn't care either, and asked softly: "Excuse me... can I... slowly walk behind you, I won't touch you."

He waited for a few seconds, seeing that the boy didn't speak, he suddenly felt a little happy in his heart, it seemed that there was still hope.

"If you don't speak, I will take it as your acquiescence, then I will walk over."

Xu Jingheng patted Xu Li on the shoulder, pointed to the boy behind, and signaled that he was going to go.

Seeing the worried look in Xu Li's eyes, Xu Jingheng raised his chin again, signaling him to rest assured, "Dad, can you sit in the car first? I have something to tell him."

Xu Li nodded after hesitating for a few seconds, sat in the car and closed the door.

Xu Jingheng walked slowly and extremely carefully behind the boy. The boy seemed to feel a breath approaching from behind, and his hands clenched a little when no one noticed.

Xu Jingheng lowered his voice and said, "Actually...you are still hesitating whether to die, right?"

The boy turned his head and looked at him blankly.

Xu Jingheng was stunned for a moment, his eyes widened suddenly, he raised his hands and waved quickly, and stammered: "No, no, no... I'm not... I'm not trying to provoke you! Don't get me wrong! I didn't mean that!"

The boy chuckled lightly.

Xu Jingheng stared at the boy's back, and moved behind him one step at a time, and finally almost leaned against his side.

Seeing that the boy didn't say anything, Xu Jingheng put his elbows on the guardrail.

With his face propped up, he exhaled at the buildings standing vaguely in the darkness and the pitch-black water in front of him, as if he was a little disappointed, "I really want to hear what happened to you, and then help For you who have experienced these things, analyze whether it is better to be alive or dead at this stage... because I don't really want to persuade you to live as a passer-by without knowing your experience. "

Xu Jingheng said again: "But I don't want to ask, because this is your sad matter. I know that when people are in despair, if they think of a sad event, the subsequent sad events will come up one after another, and then... People's emotions will be extremely negative, leading to collapse."

The boy on the guardrail remained silent, and Xu Jingheng continued: "I think... since you have come here, you must have the idea of ​​not wanting to live. But, you are still sitting on it, and you didn't jump off. That’s why there’s still a reason to want to live.”

Xu Jingheng raised his head, turned his face to the boy's face, and saw the boy was squinting at him with his head down.

He smiled, "I said... right?"

There was a lot of blood on the boy's face, but it was almost dried by the wind, and there were no traces of tears.

He still didn't speak.

Xu Jingheng laughed happily: "If you don't speak, I will take it as your acquiescence."

He changed his posture, folded his palms on the guardrail, and lowered his chin to gently touch the back of his hand, "I think... If you have many reasons for wanting to die, but only one reason for wanting to live Reason, you have to live."

When Xu Jingheng didn't see the boy's eyebrows, he frowned slightly.

Xu Jingheng lowered his eyes, and said funny: "Because when you close your eyes, you can't see anything, there is no hope, and there is only darkness. But when you open your eyes, you can still see what you want to see. The sun, the beauty of the earth...and yourself."

"Opening your eyes is light. And light has always been able to defeat darkness."

The boy sighed, a little helpless, "What did you say... What did you say, you think you are a psychological mentor?"

Xu Jingheng pursed his lips and raised an eyebrow at the boy.

The boy glanced at him, then looked at the river in front of him again, and said in a cold voice, "Bystander, it's too easy to say..."

Xu Jingheng's eyelashes drooped slightly, "Yes, I am a bystander, but you are not... You are not a bystander of your own life. The bystanders want you to live, and you should let yourself live even more."

The boy sneered and closed his eyes, "When you have experienced what I have experienced...and felt my feelings...maybe you won't even hesitate and die right away."

Xu Jingheng nodded thoughtfully, but said in a brisk tone: "Hmm...maybe. In fact, I had a hard time a while ago, that is... school violence, you know? Haha... I was just bullied by school. the one."

The boy turned to stare at him with disdain in his eyes.

Xu Jingheng shrugged his shoulders, and said heartlessly about the thing that made him have nightmares every night, "Those people beat me up every day when they caught me. I have no power to resist because I am outnumbered, you see look!"

He smiled, raised his wrist, which was scratched by those people with the point of a compass, and left a slight scar, and handed it to the boy, shaking it, "They made it, hehe..."

The boy looked at Xu Jingheng with a strange...uh...looking like a fool.

Seeing the boy's eyes, Xu Jingheng burst out laughing, "Don't look at me like that, please be careful..."

He retracted his hand, "I... I was bullied for a long time at that time, and my classmates in school ignored me, so I could only play with myself."

"But... playing with myself is really boring and depressing... I feel that the world is getting smaller and smaller, and there are fewer and fewer people. There is no sound around me anymore, and I gradually feel uncomfortable I don’t know my own existence, I can’t find the meaning of living, it’s even difficult to breathe, and I can’t taste the food.”

Last year, Xu Jingheng often had nightmares, dreaming that he fell into the abyss, or drowned in the deep sea and couldn't struggle, and then woke up sweating profusely.

"At that time, I really wanted to have a friend, and I really wanted someone to be close to me when everyone was far away from me."

Xu Jingheng turned around, leaned against the bridge guardrail, and looked at the indifferent boy with a leisurely attitude, "It sounds simple to others on such a day, but it is really tormenting for the parties involved... …Just as I cannot feel your pain, you cannot feel my pain.”

He smiled inexplicably, "You see, at least you are still hesitating, aren't you? If you hesitate, you still have concerns. If you have concerns, don't give up easily."

He sighed softly, "If you can't change it...you can choose to escape. Like me, I chose to escape. I chose to leave that place and start over here."

The reason for his avoidance, disgust is the second, and fear is the first.

In fact, S city is so good, why do you hate S city... that is, you hate those people who do evil around you.

Fear of those fists that hit him again and again, fear that one day... his world will really become a space where only he exists.