can i trust you

As soon as Ding Li said this good word, Ding Yixing was so angry that he couldn't speak, pointed at him with his index finger for a long time, and finally got up and went out.

Ding Li sat quietly on the spot without moving.

It wasn't until Shen Mo came to him and touched his head that he raised his head, looked at Shen Mo, and said softly, "Let's go."

In fact, Ding Li has no emotion at all about Ding Yixing's words, no matter whether Ding Yixing is serious or speaking in anger.

He didn't care whether Ding Yixing gave him money or not.

Anyway, what Ding Li wanted, Ding Yixing never gave him.

The only thing that made him feel bad was that he didn't know how to go back to see his aunt and grandma later.

Thinking of this, Ding Li suddenly opened his mouth and said to Shen Mo, "Let me make a call." Then he took out his mobile phone.

After dialing the phone, before Ding Li could speak, he heard the other person say, "I heard from your mother that your father asked your sister-in-law to check your records?"

"Ah."

"what happened?"

Ding Li smiled, "I thought you could guess it."

There was a moment of silence on the other side, "So? What do you think?"

"That's what I thought."

"So you and that boy?"

"Ah."

There was another silence on the other side, and then he smiled, "It is estimated that when your father comes back, he should come to me to ask the teacher for his crimes."

"none of your business."

"Why don't you close it? After all, I raised you. Your father probably blames me for raising you in a wrong way."

"He has the ability to support himself."

"It's just a lot of talking... Let's bring someone back during the May Day holiday. I have to take a look."

"My dad said that he will ignore me in the future, and I will have no place to live when I go back."

"I can also miss the place where you live. Remember to tell me if you have anything to do."

"Ah."

Both of them were quiet for a while, and then the other person spoke again, "Ding Li, I know you have your own ideas about things. I also know that what you have decided will not be easily changed..." said with a smile , "How long have you not called me. A call is a big deal."

Ding Li also smiled, "I don't want to disturb you."

"Oh, so this call doesn't bother me?"

"This is an explanation, it's different."

"Okay. Anyway, for many things, you can make your own decision. Just a little. If you make your own decision, don't regret any decision."

"I know."

"Well. Hang up if you have nothing to do. Your mother doesn't know yet. If she knows, she will probably nag you."

"She's nagging a lot. I just don't listen."

"You, how many times have I told you. You can't be like your dad. Why don't you listen. "

"I'll just listen to you."

"Then I will let you separate, do you listen?"

"Do not listen."

The other side laughed, "Wake up. That's it. If I tell you for a while, I'll be pissed off."

Ding Li smiled and hung up the phone without saying a word.

Seeing Ding Li hang up the phone with a smile, Mo Mo asked him, "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing. My aunt asked me to take you back on May [-]st."

I stared at him in silence for a while, it didn't look like he was in a bad mood, "Okay."

The two walked back quietly.

After walking for a while, Ding Li raised the corner of his mouth and said, "Ask whatever you want."

"Your father..."

"I'm out of breath."

"..."

Ding Li smiled, "It's none of your business. Even if it wasn't you, he would do the same. He didn't want me to find a boyfriend or girlfriend outside. It's just that you happen to be a man this time. Give him more play space."

"What's the meaning?"

"It means that even if you are a girl, he will find a way to disagree. He is like this. He feels that he is the head of the family and is the authority. He has to listen to everything. He wants me to go back, so he will keep saying If you want me to go back. All the words mean, I still have to go back after graduation, I always have to go back. Why should I go back. He can’t control me or help me when I go back. I have to rely on myself .In this case, why should I go back? Staying outside is not the same as working hard.”

Shen Mo frowned, "Just because you don't want to go back?"

Ding Li took a deep breath, "Many people love their families, they would like to be by their parents' side, and they would like to be closer to their parents. That's what they think. I haven't wanted to go back to that home since high school. I can't feel it. To a little sense of belonging. Some only have indifference, and a sense of oppression. They don't see me as their child. Just their appendage. I need to do things according to their ideas. I am enough. Since I realized that I am because I've had enough of their vanity from the beginning. I've been walking all the way, and I don't feel anything except that they pay me tuition and living expenses. I know how deformed my character is. But when I realized At that time, I was already like this." He said with a smile, "Are you scared by me?"

"No."

"Silence, in fact, I have never been a good boy. I just hide myself. Although I am confident that I can hide for a lifetime. But you should know.

I hate everything around me.I hated from the moment I realized what I had become.I envy those who are luckier than me, and I envy those who work harder than me.I should try, I know.But whenever what I have worked so hard to do is not as good as what those people do with ease, I feel that the world is unfair.

Why.Why do I deserve all this.

Why should I have that damn obsessive-compulsive disorder.Why can't I communicate with others normally like others.Why can others feel the love of their parents.I know it's not that my parents don't love me.Maybe they love me too.But when I can understand, I have lived for more than ten years under the feeling of not being loved.

So, be silent, loving me will be tiring.Are you still willing to love me? "

Mo Mo looked at Ding Li quietly, and said softly, "As long as you are still you, I will love you."

The author has something to say:

It was the first time that Ding Li spread himself out for Shen Mo to see.Because he really pressed for too long.

Regarding Ding Li, I have always said that he is not a particularly nice person.

In fact, Ding Li understood many things.He has been hurt by friendship time and time again, but he still longs for pure friendship, which is why he can always remember when others treat him a little bit kindly.He also longs for family affection. Although he keeps saying how much his parents don't love him, he still wants to believe that they love him in his heart.It's just that he didn't dare to take these thoughts as his real thoughts.Because he really couldn't bear more damage.That's why he cared so much about silence.

Maybe everyone thinks it is wrong for him to hurt his parents for a relationship that has not started for a long time and does not know how long it will last.But it was because they were Ding Li's parents that Ding Li knew that it was useless for him to compromise once.Because what they want is not Ding Li's compromise this time, what they want is Ding Li's lifetime compromise. If they compromise this time, there will be a next time, next time, so Ding Li insists on his own ideas.

There is another reason.This feeling is the only feeling that Ding Li can grasp.So it is impossible for Ding Li to let go.

In fact, I like Ding Li very much, but my writing skills are limited, and I may not write Ding Li particularly well.

Friends who have read my other articles may find that the protagonists in my articles are not particularly beautiful people.Probably, it's because I'm not a nice person either.

In short, I still hope that everyone can like Ding Li.Even though he's not that good, he really craves every emotion in the world.

Thanks to everyone who came in.than a 2.And then, presumably, it's over.