[HP Doujin] take care of you

With Ron, Hermione, Harry, Neville and Luna, Ginny felt like she was back in her fourth year when they fought against the Ministry of Magic together.They cooperated tacitly and chatted happily.Sitting in the Requirement Room so they wouldn't be disturbed by the people at school, they were almost like normal teenagers.

Ginny sat next to Luna, chatting and braiding her friend's hair.Harry often looked at Ginny with soft green eyes, and Ginny would often blush.She did all these things and fell in love with his godfather, she didn't deserve his favor.How was she going to tell him?

"Granny is here, too," said Neville, adding another name to the list of people who lived at Hogwarts.

"Really?" Ginny asked in surprise.

"How do you feel, Neville?" Hermione asked kindly, looking up from the book to see his reaction.

Neville shrugged.

"After fifth grade, she encouraged me even more," he said slowly.

"Most of the students who were picked up from school have returned," Ginny noticed in the Great Hall that morning. "Why?"

Ron frowned on the sofa.

"Mysterious man," he said briefly. "Duh."

Ginny rolled her eyes.

"Couldn't be more obvious, Ron," she called to him.

Harry smiled at Ginny, and she couldn't help the smirk too.

"Voldemort killed so many members of the magical family, it's a little difficult for the wizarding world to ignore him," Hermione replied.

"It's safe here," agreed Neville.

"Aren't we kind of sitting around waiting to die?" Ginny asked.

"Not everyone is here," Luna said dreamily.

"Some members of the Order were gathering allies outside the school. Before you came back, your whole family was doing it."

Ginny lowered her eyes when Hermione mentioned her time travel.She hadn't been forced to talk about the mission yet, she wasn't ready.She didn't know if she would ever be ready one day.How would she describe to her friends the feeling of being fully accepted in another time and place?How is she going to talk about James and Dorcas and Lily and everyone in 1978 without breaking down?

The room fell silent and Harry cleared his throat.

"Who wants to play Crackle and Blast?"

Ron immediately jumped off the sofa and moved to Harry's side.Harry produced a deck of ordinary cards, but Ginny knew how messy they could be.

Ginny finished braiding Luna's light hair with a smile.Luna turned to look at Ginny.

"I miss you," Luna told her.

Neville sat down next to Luna and Ginny.

"Me too, Ginny," Neville agreed, laughing. "It's good to have you back. Hogwarts just isn't the same without you."

"I miss you two too," Ginny said, trying to hug her two close friends.

But this is very strange.Although Neville and Luna had been close to Ginny before she left, she now felt as though there was some distance between them.Maybe only Ginny felt that way, but she couldn't help feeling that things would never be the same again.

"Are you still in class?"

Ginny thought her question was stupid, but she really didn't know.She's still learning about what happened in the months she's been away.Hogwarts went from school to refuge.Wizards and witches, children and old people, live at the school, preparing for the doomed battle against Voldemort and the Death Eaters.Anyone is welcome to come and go, but it's up to the Order of the Phoenix to decide how much freedom a person has within the school.

"Never mind," Neville told her. "It's more like a training session to help people prepare for battle. But these are at the professor's discretion."

Ginny nodded, looking at Harry and Ron.Harry was waiting for Ron to settle down, lost in his own thoughts.He seemed anxious and restless, and she wanted to help him.

After more than an hour, Harry lost to Ron, Hermione finished her study notes, and they decided to leave the Room of Requirement.Harry walked over to Ginny as they entered the corridor.They slowed down, and the others didn't notice, but kept going.

"Are you feeling better?" Harry asked concerned.

Ginny nodded.She does feel better.With her friends and family around, and without Sirius in sight, Ginny felt normal.

"Thank you this morning," said Ginny, taking his hand.

He shrugged, but smiled.

"Of course." He replied softly. "But I thank you very much, too."

Ginny looked at Harry confused.He bowed his head to her, his eyes sparkling, and she felt her heart tighten.

"Why did you risk your life to bring Sirius back from the Veil?" Harry asked her. "I've been trying to figure it out, but...but I don't understand. Why did you do that?"

Ginny was speechless, not knowing what to say.They continued walking down the corridor arm in arm.

"I can't even yell at you about it," Harry continued, seeing that she didn't answer. "Because Sirius is back... is the best thing that ever happened to me. And it's all because of you."

Harry sounded like he was about to cry.

"But why did you do that?"

Ginny sighed.What can she say to him?She saved Sirius because she needed him in her life?She saved Sirius because she loved him?As long as Sirius can regain his life, is she willing to risk her life?

"I'm for you," she said finally. "I know you need him."

Harry's mouth fell open in surprise.Thinking of the lie she just told him, she felt guilty and ashamed, and her body heated up uncomfortably.And worst of all, her words made him look flattered.Harry stopped, and before Ginny could react, he pulled her into his arms.His lips were on hers, and she grabbed his shirt.

"Don't do that again, okay?"

But when Harry bent down to kiss her, Ginny stepped back and let go of his shirt.She bit her lip and clenched her hands into fists.

"Harry," she whispered, frowning.

I can't, she wanted to say.A look of sadness flashes across his face, then he looks embarrassed and rubs his neck like James.The thought made her feel sick, and she backed away again.

"I'm leaving," she told him.

The last thing she wanted was to leave a bewildered Harry.She'd never wanted to hurt Harry, but she couldn't pretend there was nothing wrong now.So Ginny turned and walked down the corridor, ignoring his burning eyes as she watched her go.

-*.*.*-

When Ginny found Remus, he wasn't alone.It was a shocking realization that someone else was with him, that someone else was with him.Sitting in front of the fireplace with Tonks, Remus didn't hear Ginny enter his office.Tonks was lying on the ground, his socked foot resting on Remus' lap.Ginny froze, jealously watching the harmonious love between the two.

"Lupine, you'd better not—"

Remus scratched one of Tonks' feet, and she laughed and tried to kick him away, but Remus continued to scratch her with a smirk.

"Soon you won't be calling me Lupine so insultingly," Remus said softly.

She stopped struggling, raised her eyebrows, and wiggled her toes.

"Soon." Remus let go of Tonks's feet, moved closer to her face, and continued. "You're going to be Mrs. Lupine—"

Ginny backed away, wanting to leave the office, not wanting them to know that she had rudely barged in without knocking.But her back hit the door that was quietly closed behind her, and the sound resounded through the room.Remus looked up, and his face fell when he saw Ginny.Tonks sat up with his eyes wide open.

"Ginny!" Remus stood up frantically, reaching out to help Tonks up.

Tonks took his hand and he carefully helped her to her feet.Ginny blushed, still not sure how to behave around Remus and his fiancée, and held out her hand to the doorknob behind her.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she murmured. "Let's talk later, Remus."

"Hello, Ginny," Tonks called as Ginny left the office, closing the door behind her.

Ginny took a breath through her nose, and Remus walked out of the office before she could leave the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.She blushed with shame and turned to look at him.He smiled apologetically at her and walked towards her.

"Sorry, Remus," Ginny whispered, wrapping her arms around her chest.

He shrugged slightly and put his hands in his trouser pockets.Although he had left Tonks in his office, the time they spent together still made his countenance glow.Ginny noticed.She actually felt unhappy about it, she felt bad.

"It's okay." He replied slowly. "What's the matter with you?"

Ginny fidgeted, then shook her head.

"It's nothing, I just—" Seeing Remus' knowing expression, she stopped. "What's wrong?"

"Don't think this will make a difference," Remus told her. "I'm still the same as you."

Ginny forced a laugh.

"Everything is different," Ginny said softly. "Everything. Nothing stays the same. I feel like a lot happened today—"

"Because a lot really happened today. Perhaps it's time for you to go to bed?"

She knew that he had tried not to use the tone of an adult preaching to a child.Ginny knew that his tone was not intentionally condescending.Ginny knew in her heart that his words hadn't been meant to be harsh.But the fact is.

Her expression must have given her away, because Remus groaned and rubbed his face with his hands.

"Ginny," he said, trying to be as understanding as possible. "I mean, you probably feel better when you sleep. It seems to be easier tomorrow, too."

He wanted to be with Tonks.Of course, why wouldn't Remus want to be with his fiancée?Ginny felt her stomach sink and she started to back away.

"You're right," Ginny told him. "See you tomorrow."

Ginny didn't wait for his answer.She closed the classroom door and ran down the corridor.When she returned to the student union chairman's dormitory, she was out of breath.Ginny rested her hand on the drawing of a raven and a snake, trying to slow down her heartbeat.

She was annoyed, mostly with herself.How dare she hurt Harry's feelings when Harry didn't know what had happened to her?It wasn't his fault that she felt guilty for smiling at him and kissing him.How dare she turn to him for comfort when Remus had a life of his own besides hers?He is finally happy.Remus was no longer the teenager who worried about his three best friends, Ginny and homework.

How dare she feel that Luna and Neville would never fill James and Lily's place in her life?Sirius lived so carefree, how could she dare to feel that she was incomplete without his attention?How dare she want to cry for hours on her mother's lap because she hasn't been able to do so in months, and her mother has been working non-stop for the Order of the Phoenix?

How dare she feel like a 16-year-old girl who screwed things up?

Ginny opened the portrait and walked into the common room.No one was there except Charlie, who was sleeping on the couch.Seeing him sleeping made her body ache, and she longed for her bed upstairs waiting for her.She climbed the stairs, into the bedroom, took off her shoes, and climbed onto the bed.The bed was so comfortable, she had only one thought, I wish it wasn't, and afterward, she fell asleep.

-*.*.*-

When Ginny woke up the next morning, the depression was still in her chest.It was as if something was weighing heavily on her chest, making it hard for her to breathe.The pressure had unprecedented force, and it cluttered her mind.

She rolled over, and sunlight streamed in through the window, illuminating her room.At least the weather looks good outside.Ginny got out of bed and began to tidy up slowly, she had never been a morning person.Most of her family would be with the Order today to discuss strategy.She is only 16 so she cannot attend the meeting.

For the first time, Ginny didn't want to go either.She didn't want to hear anything about Voldemort and his methods of torture.He has ruined her life.

Ginny got dressed and found herself staring annoyingly.She came to the auditorium, which was full of families who had come to have breakfast.Ginny wondered where everyone went after dinner.Hogwarts is a huge castle, but how do you pass the boring time?Seeing everyone's smiling faces made Ginny feel better again.

Life wasn't going well, yes, but at least she was able to enjoy breakfast, relax for the day, and clear her mind.

"Good morning."

Ginny was startled, and spilled the orange juice she had just poured on the table.Sirius looked at her with polite interest, and Ginny's face flushed.She grabbed a napkin and immediately covered her face with her hair, cleaning up the mess.His voice echoed in her ears, and her hands trembled.He is still alive.It's him.

"Ginny?"

She looked up, breathing hard.

"Good morning, Sirius," she whispered.

He smiled charmingly and sat down beside her without asking if she could.This was Sirius' way, and Ginny's heart tightened.

"I've been waiting for you to get up," he told her.

Ginny just stared at him.She didn't know if she looked weird, but she couldn't control it.He is still alive.Sirius Black was alive, and it was all because of Ginny.The world around Ginny seemed out of control, but at least Sirius was constant and real, and he was alive.

"Hey, Ginny, you're talking too fast, I can't even understand." Sirius lowered his face, but his eyes were smiling. "Give you a second to organize your thoughts."

It was so cruel, she wanted to cry.

"Aren't you—shouldn't you be at the Order of the Phoenix meeting?"

It was all she could think of to say.Sirius gratefully accepted the response, took an apple out of the basket, and took a bite.He chewed thoughtfully for a few moments before answering.

"They don't like my presence," he finally replied. "And I don't like going. Not yet anyway."

He continued to chew the apple while Ginny watched him.He was older, much older than the last time she had seen him, but he was still handsome.His torment from Azkaban seemed to fade.Sirius looked happy.

"Why are you chatting with me?" she asked, but she didn't mean to use such a cold tone.

Sirius raised his eyebrows.

"Everyone's at the meeting. Except you. Anyway, I think we need to talk."

Ginny turned sideways and took some food.But she doesn't want to eat anymore.

"What are you talking about?"

Sirius grabbed Ginny's hand that was going to get the toast.His touch made her skin crawl, and she stared at him with wide eyes, wondering if he felt it too.Sirius looked at her curiously and leaned towards her.

"Talk about why you rescued me from the veil."

Ginny was dumbfounded and disgusted.Why did she come down for breakfast?Hearing his words, her face flushed, and a fine layer of sweat floated on her forehead.She wanted to breathe normally, to focus and come up with a lie.For Harry, for Harry, I saved you for Harry...

Sirius held her arm, and the strength he used was surprisingly light.Sirius was always rude and straightforward with Ginny, and he always wanted her to listen to him, whether that meant pinning her to the ground, pulling her back to face him, or cupping her face, She couldn't avert her eyes—his touch was so light it didn't exist.If Ginny's nerves weren't so sensitive, she might not even notice.

"Are you all right, kid?"