Point

Crane City has always started to cool down from October.Seasonal changes in this city are not clear. It seems that the cold air rushes over overnight. When you get up early and open the curtains, you can see pedestrians who were wearing short-sleeved clothes yesterday and have already put on coats.

He Tianxi was okay, and didn't care much about the temperature change.He lived at Yang Eryu's house until the end of September, during which time his friends were trying to stay with him.

Yang Eryu is talkative and big-hearted. He always talks to himself about whether he likes to chat with him. The big things include "my mother got married again and found a little boy who is not a few years older than me", and the small things are "driving at the traffic lights today When I was waiting for the bus, I saw the old man crossing the zebra crossing, and saw the old man rushing for the green light without zipping his trousers.” All sorts of things were stuffed into his mind like a duck. Talking made him shut up, and sometimes staring blankly at Yang Eryu's repeatedly closed and opened lips, he even began to understand how Xing Congjing felt that the song he was listening to was noisy.

Sister Jialin has a jewelry store in the city center. She calls herself a jewelry designer, but she is obviously not very enthusiastic about her work. She lived with He Tianxi at Yang Eryu's house for a few days, sleeping until At eleven o'clock, she got up from the bed and knocked on the door of He Tianxi's room. He Tianxi ignored her, and she opened the door directly to dig He Tianxi out of the quilt.

"Privacy..." He Tianxi huddled under the quilt, and sometimes he would utter two words with great difficulty. In his brain, he felt that he was about to shout angrily, "Sister, can I still have privacy", but He felt physically tired and couldn't lift his spirits, so he could only spit out two words a little weakly.

Sister Jialin didn't pay much attention to the privacy of an adult man. She lifted his quilt like a kindergarten kid's quilt, then dragged him out of bed, stared at him to wash, and then asked him to take Yang Eryu's adopted puppy with him Go out for a walk.

He Tianxi resisted to no avail. When he walked out of the house with He Jialin, he felt that He Jialin was going out for a walk with two dogs, one of which had a particularly difficult leash.

After walking the dog and eating lunch, He Jialin would find a lot of inexplicable old movies, hold snacks and press him to watch movies with him.

He Tianxi has no interest in watching movies, and now he is even less interested in movies. Most of the time he stares at the colorful screen in a daze. Sometimes He Jialin starts to cry when he sees a touching part of the movie, and she beckons him to pass a tissue Crying to myself, I asked, "Why don't you cry, are you serious about going to the movies with me?"

When He Tianxi handed her the tissue, tears would roll down her face inexplicably because of her doubt.He threw down the tissue for He Jialin, raised the back of his arm and kept wiping his eyes. He felt ashamed and baffled. He didn't know why he was crying, as if some organs of his body were out of his control.

He cried sadly, and He Jialin's eyes looked more kind, like an 80-year-old lady who sees through the world.She pulled out a tissue, moved over to wipe the tears on his face, and said softly, "The movie is very touching, right? It's okay. You should cry when you are moved. You should cry when you are sad. After crying, you will be fine, okay?"

He Tianxi wiped the tears on his face carelessly with a tissue, and argued in a low voice, "I don't want to cry."

He Jialin said: "It's okay, I want to cry, I infected you."

He Tianxi always cried with He Jialin at the end of September like this. He didn't know why He Jialin always had so many sympathetic tears when watching movies, and he didn't know where He Jialin could find so many movies that could cry. I only know that every time He Jialin asked him "why don't you cry", he always burst into tears inexplicably.

Until he refused to watch movies with He Jialin, when He Jialin entered the room and wanted to dig him up from the bed in the room, he huddled under the quilt with red eyes and said in a low voice: "I won't watch movies with you anymore, you too I can cry."

He Jialin stood beside his bed and bent down to touch his head. Her eyes were kind like his 79-year-old grandmother. He Tianxi was inexplicably amused: "You look like an old lady now."

He Jialin didn't speak, she sighed softly, and walked out of his room, he finally didn't have to watch movies with He Jialin, nor did he have to cry with He Jialin.

He Tianxi felt that his brain seemed to be dull, as if the parts were old and rusted. He could receive He Jialin and Yang Eryu's concern for him, but he couldn't understand it, and felt that it was meaningless. He felt that many things in life were Meaningless.

This feeling is a bit like when he just left Crane City at the age of 20 to go to college.

He didn't live on campus when he was a freshman. The gift from his family for going to college was to buy a small apartment next to the school for his convenience.His brother gave him a sports car as a gift for college entrance examination. He didn't go to class all day, and he raced with others in the streets with no people at midnight. Most of the time, he was drunk and unconscious.

It is the feeling that the whole person has become very dull. I don't know what day it is today, what tomorrow will be, or even what I am doing.

In the first semester of his freshman year, he once raced with someone on a deserted street at night. There were never many people on that road in the early morning. That day, he had a carnival with the people who took him to play in the middle of the night, and everyone stepped on the accelerator very loudly.

He Tianxi was very erratic at the time. The soaring speed of the car made his brain constantly secrete dopamine. He felt the excitement was very refreshing, until a car in front of him made a screeching sound of brakes on the empty street, and the car behind him slammed into it. , The huge impact sound stimulated his brain to freeze instantly. He slammed on the brakes and turned the steering wheel quickly. The car hit the roadside street light, the airbag deployed, and his brain buzzed.

He didn't know what happened to the car in front of him, his fingers were trembling, and he felt that he almost ran into it.

It was only later that he realized that the car that ran to the front had no time to brake when it saw someone on the road, and the car following him directly hit it, killing two and injuring the other.

The first time He Tianxi had close contact with death was when he was 20 years old.

He Tianxi was in Crane City before the age of 20, and lived with his parents. Because he was not in good health when he was a child, he was spoiled and spoiled. There was almost no troublesome rebellious period. After leaving Crane City and going to university, his rebellious period came too much. Ferocious, he dared not tell his parents about the car accident, and secretly called his brother, who was pissed off by him, scolded him severely, and then asked him if he was injured.

He Tianxi was not injured, but he was a little frightened, and he crashed a street light and needed compensation. He was driving late at night on the road and usually had no accidents, so he could turn a blind eye to it. Now that something happened, he would definitely have to be punished administratively. He couldn't handle these things. Otherwise, he wouldn't even make this call with his own brother.

My brother sent someone to help him deal with things.

This person is Xing Congjing.

Xing Congjing was helping his brother's company during his senior internship. He Tianxi hadn't seen Xing Congjing for more than two years at that time. Although he didn't want to admit it, he did have some fear of Xing Congjing at that time.

He Tianxi has never been afraid of anyone since he was a child, but he was afraid of Xing Congjing when he was 21 years old, even though Xing Congjing at that time only existed in his memory.

Xing Congjing didn't contact him first when he first arrived in his university city. He quickly and decisively dealt with his traffic accident with a method he still doesn't know. phone call.

He Tianxi was a little nervous because of the traffic accident and couldn't go out to play anymore, so he went to the classroom to attend classes. He felt that the large number of people in the school could relieve his tension.

When Xing Congjing called, the teacher was giving a lecture on the podium. He lay on the desk and connected the phone number from Hecheng boredly: "Who?"

Xing Congjing's voice was very calm, and he asked concisely: "Where are you now?"

However, He Tianxi was struck by the sound like lightning. His face turned pale. Even though he had never contacted him for more than two years, he could still distinguish Xing Congjing's voice very clearly. He suddenly stood up at the back door of the classroom, The fingers holding the phone are all straining.

In the eyes of his classmates and teachers, he walked out of the classroom from the back door with a white face. He walked all the way to the window at the end of the corridor without saying a word.

Xing Congjing's voice became a little impatient: "Did you hear me? Do you need me to ask again?"

He Tianxi felt like a drowning fish, like a fish choked by water, and in Xing Congjing's impatient voice, he struggled to let out the air bubbles stuck in his throat: "Mmm."

After he made the sound, Xing Congjing was quiet for a short moment, and then asked: "Where are you now, sleeping at home?"

He Tianxi said with difficulty: "At school."

"Well." Xing Congjing, "Your driver's license has not been revoked yet. I'm in the repair shop. I'll sell your car for you. You can ask your brother to change it for you. But I suggest you stop driving until you are sane enough to understand that a car is just a means of transportation."

Under Xing Congjing's sarcasm, He Tianxi felt the many bubbles in his throat spit out all at once, and then burst into the air. He tried his best to stabilize his voice, as if he was facing him. Anyone in front of him: "You, he, mom, here, put, what, what, fart?" He cursed out this sentence word by word.

Xing Congjing even laughed out loud on the other end of the phone, and hung up the call without replying.

He Tianxi remembered that his car was sold by Xing Congjing in the end, and Xing Congjing would not care about his opinion, never would.

He lost a hobby of speed racing. After he regained his energy completely, because he had nothing to do and was bored, he found someone to drink every day, got drunk, and finally hurt his leg when he went downstairs.

Then Xing Congjing appeared directly in front of him.

At that time, he hadn't seen Xing Congjing for three years, and almost a year had passed since the last phone call. He didn't buy a new car, and he didn't go racing again. The feet were wrapped in plaster and rested at home.

At that time, he had a girlfriend. He had only known him for a week, and his foot was put in a cast and he could not move. The girlfriend would come to his house to take care of him every once in a while.When Xing Congjing came, his girlfriend was cooking in the kitchen, and he stood at the door and knocked on the door.

He Tianxi crossed his legs on the sofa while smoking a cigarette and playing games. Because it was inconvenient to move, he was a little angry when he heard the knock on the door: "Who the fuck?!"

The frequency of Xing Congjing's knocking on the door remained unchanged, and his girlfriend wiped her hands and immediately went to open the door, then stood at the door and asked suspiciously: "Hello, who are you looking for?"

Xing Congjing stood at the door with a backpack on her back, nodded slightly: "Hello, is this He Tianxi's house?"

He Tianxi heard his voice, and the hand holding the game controller slipped suddenly, and the game character he controlled died instantly. The tip of his nose was sweating a little, and he didn't dare to glance towards the door from the corner of his eyes.

"Okay, excuse me." He heard Xing Congjing's voice, and could vaguely feel that his girlfriend found a pair of shoes for Xing Congjing, and then Xing Congjing stepped into his safe area.

He Tianxi seemed to have been electrocuted, he couldn't hear his girlfriend's voice, and when he turned his head to look at the door, Xing Congjing was hanging his backpack on the shelf at the door.Xing Congjing looked at him, raised his eyebrows slightly, and opened his mouth slightly as if he wanted to speak, but He Tianxi suddenly looked away as if he had been burned, and he cursed secretly, "Fuck", Putting down the game console in his hand, he hopped on one foot and went to the kitchen to find his girlfriend.

My girlfriend said, "Don't worry, you can eat it in a while, don't order takeaway every day, you can do it yourself."

He Tianxi stood next to his girlfriend, staring at his girlfriend's cooking with unprecedented seriousness. Although it sounded really cowardly, at that time he really hoped that this meal could last forever.

Of course, it is impossible to have a meal that lasts forever. My girlfriend put everything on the table and helped He Tianxi sit on one leg, and warmly invited Xing Congjing to have dinner together.

Xing Congjing was sitting on the sofa playing the game console that He Tianxi left behind. He lowered his head, and the curvature of his jaw line looked so relaxed that he was staying alone in his familiar place. He said: " No, you eat, I have eaten."

After He Tianxi had dinner with his girlfriend, it was Xing Congjing who washed the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen. He politely suggested to his girlfriend, "It's not safe for girls to go back to school too late. Let me clean up the kitchen." The girlfriend thanked him gratefully. Afterwards, he left He Tianxi's house.

He Tianxi was really sitting on the sofa at home, as if on pins and needles.

Xing Congjing was never uncomfortable, and wherever he went, he would never really feel that he "disturbed" the other party. He rolled up his sleeves and washed the dishes in the kitchen. He asked He Tianxi: "He Jialin said that you are drinking and drinking. Broke your leg while stepping on the stairs?"

He Tianxi squeezed out two words between his teeth: "Fart."

Xing Congjing snorted, and said, "Your brother said that you have been a little outrageous recently, let me come and see you."

He Tianxi had a lot of thoughts going through his mind at that time, such as who the hell broke his foot, but it was only slightly twisted; and how did his brother know that he fell down the stairs? He would say; he also blamed his younger brother for falling, why didn’t his own brother come to see him, and why did he entrust some kind of agent to come; the last sentence he thought was “I have nothing to do with you”.

I didn't express my thoughts on the previous points, but I did say the last sentence.

Xing Congjing didn't speak, and the house was so quiet that only the sound of water running in the kitchen remained.

It was even more unbearable for He Tianxi to be on the sofa at home. He frequently switched on and off the screen of his mobile phone, and frequently clicked into his chat software, hoping that there would be a friend who asked him out for a drink.

But because of his well-known foot injury, no one came to him during this time.

After washing the dishes, Xing Congjing asked, "Where is the bathroom?"

He Tianxi bought a small apartment, and the layout of the house can be seen clearly at a glance. There is no need to ask where is where. He originally wanted to scold Xing Congjing for not having eyes, but Xing Congjing walked to the sofa and bent slightly. After taking a look at him, he pretended that he was chatting with other people, raised his hand casually and pointed in a random direction: "Over there."

When Xing Congjing walked away, He Tianxi suddenly raised his head and stared at his back.

When He Tianxi was 21 to 21 years old, he was very afraid of seeing Xing Congjing, and was even very afraid of hearing Xing Congjing's voice, until Xing Congjing came to his university city inexplicably at the age of [-], and lived in his house for a week. He felt that he had recognized the essence of Xing Congjing.

He's a fucking man at heart.

After he came out of the bathroom, he took out the daily necessities he was carrying from his bag, walked back and put them in the bathroom, and after he came out, he asked He Tianxi, "Have you not showered for a few days?"

At that time, He Tianxi's fingers were stiff because of his presence, and when he heard this, he let out a slightly demented "ah".

Xing Congjing asked: "Don't you think you smell bad?"

"..." He Tianxi's nose moved.

Xing Congjing said, "I'll help you take a bath."

The mobile phone He Tianxi used to pretend that he was busy was pressed on the sofa by him. He raised his eyes to look at Xing Congjing, and shook his head suddenly: "No." He refused.

Xing Congjing didn't care about his refusal, he took He Tianxi to the bathroom, found a small stool for He Tianxi to sit down, and flattened the injured leg.

He Tianxi's face was pale and he gritted his teeth tightly. Although he was trying to restrain himself, his upper and lower teeth still made a sound because of the trembling, Xing Congjing still didn't care.

He took the shower head in his hand, washed He Tianxi's hair first, applied shampoo, rubbed He Tianxi's hair, and rinsed him off with water.

He Tianxi sat motionless on the chair, as obedient as a little rabbit.

After washing her hair, Xing Congjing said, "Take off your clothes."

He Tianxi's anger was pulled to the limit, and he yelled ferociously in the misty bathroom: "Xing Congjing, what the hell are you doing?!!"

Xing Congjing's hand was still stroking his hair, and said in his mouth: "I feel that you are quite stupid in college. Either you have a car accident in a fast car, or you fell down the stairs after drinking and eating. Since you have nothing to do, it's better to have more trouble." Looking for something to do?"

He Tianxi put his hands on the ground and wanted to stand up from the small chair, Xing Congjing said again: "What's the matter, you find that your life is a mess, do you feel that your life is very bad now? Boring and looking for excitement?"

Panting heavily, He Tianxi scolded: "You fucking idiot!"

Xing Congjing began to undress He Tianxi, rudely took off He Tianxi's drenched T-shirt, and took the shower head to pour over He Tianxi's naked chest.

He Tianxi's upper and lower teeth trembled, goosebumps appeared on all exposed skin, and his slightly raised arms trembled involuntarily.

Xing Congjing washed his upper body for him and started to take off his pants. He Tianxi grabbed his pants and gritted his teeth: "You are fucking sick! Xing Congjing! You are fucking sick! You are fucking sick! !"

Xing Congjing took off his pants, and then said: "Why, do you think your life is very hard now?" He shrugged his shoulders, still in the same indifferent manner, "That can only be endured." on."

He Tianxi can remember Xing Congjing's tone of voice and the look in his eyes.He looked at himself sarcastically, as if mocking him for moaning for nothing.

He Tianxi spent his freshman year in a daze. Xing Congjing, whom he hadn't seen for three years after his sophomore year, reappeared in his life. He was almost tough enough to break He Tianxi.

He didn't let He Tianxi drink until he was unconscious. He Tianxi drank until he was drunk for a long time. When he opened his eyes, Xing Congjing was teasing him. He didn't even take off his clothes. He is whipping He Tianxi's soul.

Xing Congjing would say at that time: "It's okay, you can drink as much as you want, and I will feel pleasure when I rape a corpse."

He Tianxi would flop on the bed like a fish, struggling to get up and wrestle with Xing Congjing.

This period of time didn't last long. He Tianxi's drinking capacity increased and he rarely had a drink, and he really didn't dare to drink any more.

He woke up after drinking the fragments. If Xing Congjing was beside him, he would feel like a beast in Xing Congjing's eyes.

Now eight years later, he has become listless and muddled again, not knowing what he is doing every day, not knowing what tomorrow is, and not knowing what the fuck is going on in the future.

Nor did Xing Congjing, who was like a beast, do something like a beast to him.

He Tianxi felt very good.

Great.

Sun Ji gave him a business card of a psychological counselor, and asked him that if he wanted, he could even invite someone to visit him for consultation.

He Tianxi sat on the sofa staring at this business card, until Sun Ji sighed and asked him to think about contacting at any time, and then left, he kept staring at this nondescript card.

He only felt that there were a dozen or twenty words on the business card, each word became what Xing Congjing told him, they said——

Don't try to escape, accept it.

The author says:

Here I come, I have a list task of more than 1 words this Wednesday, shocking!