water blossoms

These thoughts seemed to be many, but they were only circulating in his head for a short second, and then Ye Shuwen had an idea.

"Crack!" He put the bowl heavily on the table, glared at the man opposite, and said coldly, "What's the matter with getting carried away after winning the championship? Don't you know how to use your brain? Don't let me hear such words for the second time." all over!"

Wen Hao was terrified by the yelling, his eyes were red, and his lips moved, wanting to say something.

Ye Shuwen glared at him: "Eat! Do you want me to say it a second time?"

"..." Wen Hao clenched his lips, lowered his head and buried his face in the bowl, and really obediently ate.

Ye Shuwen breathed a sigh of relief temporarily, at this time he had to thank Wen Hao for his personality flaws.He couldn't explain what it was, let alone analyze the reason, but he knew that under Wen Hao's gentle appearance, there was actually a timid heart like a rabbit.

Ye Shuwen felt distressed. He clearly knew that Wen Hao would not persevere in questioning him after he was angry. It was all because of the potentially painful experience, but he despicably took advantage of the other party's weakness, just for the selfish desire in his heart—— I want to maintain the same relationship with Wen Hao, I want to see Wen Hao standing on the podium of the Olympic Games, I want to see him really become stronger from the inside out.

Terrible dinner, half of a table was eaten, neither of us had appetites.After eating, Wen Hao still managed to clean up the table and wash the dishes.

After tidying up the house, Wen Hao walked to the door and said, "Coach, I'm going back."

Ye Shuwen sat on the sofa, looked at him for a long time, and shook his head: "You can't go, I have something to talk to you about."

Wen Hao's heart sank.

Sitting nervously opposite Ye Shuwen, his hands were clasped together, his feet were curled up, and he looked cramped.

Seeing Wen Hao like this, Ye Shuwen always felt that this person might be hiding in the cave again, which made him discouraged, and couldn't help pressing the bridge of his nose because of the headache.

"you……"

"Ok!"

Ye Shuwen took a deep breath: "Have you been hurt emotionally?"

"?" Wen Hao didn't expect Ye Shuwen to say this. He thought that after he sat down, he would be training him for not doing his job properly.Faced with those sharp words, he felt that he was ready for it all.

Ye Shuwen added: "I have a friend who majors in psychology. You should know him. He also came at You Mingjie's wedding. His name is Liu Yang."

Wen Hao scratched his hands subconsciously with his fingers. He had an instinctive rejection of psychology, as if he was a psychopath.

Ye Shuwen obviously understands his current state of mind very well: "In the United States, most people will have a psychiatrist's phone number in their hands. They face some setbacks in life and the resulting pressure. They think it will have a great impact on their lives. So I like chatting with a psychiatrist. I also have a psychiatrist. Liu Yang is a friend. He is too close to me. I found a psychiatrist for myself. I will tell him my dreams, my doubts in life, and treat him Views on life and feelings, every time I go there, it’s like going to a big toilet, after I finish talking, I feel refreshed physically and mentally when I come out.”

"..."

"Do you understand what I mean?" Ye Shuwen leaned forward, looking at him with burning eyes, "Go to see a psychiatrist, it's not that you are sick, but that you need to take out all the things in your heart. If the pus and blood are scraped off, you will never get better. You live too hard. With such a burden of thought, you will not be happy. Even if you think you are happy, it is only relatively speaking, and you will not understand the real What is happiness, like, like..."

"Winning the championship in the competition made me laugh from ear to ear. Thinking about it now, I'm all happy." Wen Hao said.

Ye Shuwen nodded, a smile appeared in his eyes: "Then do you want to be happy? Have you always been this happy?"

Wen Hao thought for a while and nodded.

"Then promise me and talk to Liu Yang. I think it's embarrassing to talk about this kind of thing with acquaintances, or do you think it's better to tell me?" When Ye Shuwen spoke again, his tone was much softer.He could see that Wen Hao also wanted to get out, and some things would become very simple as long as he was willing.

"Coach, do you have a girlfriend?"

Ye Shuwen was surprised. He didn't expect Wen Hao to ask him about it at this time, but he answered him seriously: "Yes, we officially got together not long ago."

Wen Hao nodded, lowered his eyes, and said, "Anytime is fine, I will have a good talk."

"Yeah." Ye Shuwen breathed a sigh of relief, this child is so distressing, so obedient, he will seriously consider and implement what he says, he really doesn't want to live up to this trust.

Leaving Ye Shuwen's dormitory, Wen Hao originally thought that he would be very sad, but for some reason, although he felt very stuffy and uncomfortable, it was far from the level he imagined.

Could it be that I have already determined that it is impossible in my heart, and hinted that I will have a tragic ending, so I feel relaxed after being dealt with by Coach Ye four or two times?

In fact, Wen Hao knew very well in his heart that Ye Shuwen had clearly rejected him today, but at the same time he also felt Ye Shuwen's "love" for him was not from a lover, but from a teacher to a student. Being persuasive is enough to make yourself feel at ease.

So, is my current state of mind at ease?

Wen Hao was a little confused.

Back in the dormitory, I struggled for a while, and when it was almost nine o'clock, Yuan Zheng went out to the play dormitory, and only Wen Hao was left in the room.

As soon as he calmed down, Wen Hao began to think again, thinking about everything that happened today, and then inevitably thought of Gong Cheng, and then the extinguished anger rose again, and he hated Gong Cheng's meddling in his life.

Is there any way to change the current situation?

A week later, Wen Hao and Liu Yang met.

Liu Yang was a member of Ye Shuwen's first class, and he also went out with the Chinese National Swimming Team. He met Ye Shuwen at the tour guide's wedding, and he still had an impression of him.Liu Yang is handsome, especially good at talking, and has a good relationship with Ye Shuwen.Wen Hao still remembers Ye Shuwen at that time, with Wei Wen on the left and Liu Yang on the right, smiling happily, different from the mature and stable person in front of him, he even made funny faces in front of these people.

At that time, he envied them very much.

Liu Yang called first and asked him where he wanted to meet. Wen Hao chose his dormitory without thinking too much.

When Liu Yang came, Yuan Zheng was kindly called away by Ye Shuwen, leaving the two of them in the room.

Two people who were so unfamiliar that they hadn't even spoken to each other.

Liu Yang is wearing loose light-colored clothes and has a soft smile, reminiscent of the spring breeze.He asked Wen Hao to sit on the bed, and then asked him to put the pillow on his lap, and then moved a chair with a backrest, placed it on the opposite side of the bed, and sat on it.

When the four eyes met, Liu Yang smiled slightly, handed Wen Hao a tablet, and said: "I heard from Ye Zi that you like to play the game of heroes, and it happens that I like it too. If you feel uncomfortable, you can play a game on your own account." can you?"

"Okay." Wen Hao cooperated, clicked on the game, and logged in to his account.This is a real-time battle game. You won't find things to do after you go up, just enter the room and fight.

Today's luck is very good, less than 8 minutes, he won the game.

Then he raised his head and looked at Liu Yang.

Liu Yang sat where he was, smiled at him, and asked, "Do you need another game?"

Wen Hao thought for a while, shook his head, and put the tablet aside: "Let's start, where do you want me to start?"

"Where you feel pain, memories that you don't want to recall, as long as you feel that you can talk about it, I will listen carefully." Liu Yang nodded to him and smiled.

You Mingjie was in Ye Shuwen's dormitory, but Yuan Zheng went somewhere. The two men were sitting on the sofa watching TV, chatting from time to time.

You Mingjie said: "Why do you suddenly want to let Liu Yang come over? Is there any problem with Wenhao?"

Ye Shuwen said: "The psychological burden is too heavy, it's time to clean it up."

"Is psychotherapy really that useful?"

"Anyway, I believe it. Believe it or not, it's up to you."

"I also feel that there is something wrong with Wen Hao's child. He has a special face, as if he has no temper, and he can rub it whatever he wants. But the key is where are we? This is the base camp of athletes, youthful and passionate, forging ahead, and full of vitality. , he appeared here, it’s too different.”

"You see it too?"

"Ah."

"Why didn't you think about it before?"

"Tsk tsk, blame me? I just took over from his former coach. At that time, he was like this. I thought it was his nature. In addition, at that time, his focus was on cultural classes, and there was no communication in training. I went to school, where would I know? If you hadn’t mentioned it, I wouldn’t have found out.”

"Okay, who doesn't know that your crooked heart is all on your nephew! Okay! I know what you want to say, no need to explain, I know, I can understand! I don't blame you, not everyone has insight, can see through Look beyond the surface to see the essence."

"..."

"In short, let Liu Yang take a look, he is more professional than us."

"...Then he hit me, and I was already stunned at that time, especially when he left, I think I must have been very ugly at that time. I knew he cheated first, and I was so manic, although it was just to me Playful mentality. But at that moment, I still had a feeling that the sky was falling. He left, closed the door, and my world was destroyed."

Liu Yang looked at the man across from him, his heart was trembling, he didn't understand how he managed to get through so much grief.Ye Shuwen said he was fragile, but Liu Yang didn't think that this man's heart might not be strong enough, but he was full of resilience. He kept wrapping up those injuries, hiding them deep in his heart, and then let himself continue to face life, at least To live well.

Wen Hao said: "Because of this incident, I was punished, suspended, and even didn't participate in the Olympic Games that year. I know they all sympathized with me, but to be honest, I think it's okay, because the whole series of things Everything makes me miserable, so being punished is just one of them."

"And after that? How did you get out?"

"Because I have to live." Wen Hao said, "I have no savings, and I haven't graduated from college. If I am still retired by the national team, I will be finished. Maybe I can only go to the construction site to move cement. I don't want to live that kind of life. I have to Let myself have a way of life after leaving here. So I put the focus of my life on my studies. A student who graduated from Peking University, this title is enough for me to find a good job.”

"That's right." Liu Yang nodded, "I retired after the 04 Olympics. I was with Ye Shuwen and Wei Wen at the time. Our condition was actually very good at that time. Wei Wen even suggested that we go to the United States to continue playing professional games. But I refused. You know, I had the same thought as you at that time. It was enough for me to swim to that level. I should think about the rest of my life. A diploma from a prestigious school is a good choice. Unfortunately, I didn’t Your signboard is ringing, I’m just a graduate of Beijing Sports.” After speaking, Liu Yang shrugged his shoulders, his tone and expression were very humorous.

Wen Hao followed with a smile.In fact, many people think it's a pity that he gave up swimming, but if he can't get out of swimming, why should he hit the south wall?Can't you take another path to make your life better?

The two "smart men" smiled at each other, and Liu Yang asked, "What about after that? Do you still have contact with him?"

Wen Hao smiled and sighed: "He wants to get back with me now."

Liu Yang raised his eyebrows: "Then what about you? What do you mean?"

"Of course not."

"why?"

"Those things happened, since I came out, why did I have to go back? Let's not say that dogs can't change eating shit, but people's feelings. After loving, I don't love anymore. Normal people don't choose to love again. Let's go back?"

"He won't give up? Are you troubled?"

"Yes."

"Have you thought of any way?"

"Ignore him, even made a move, but he still appears often."

"Do you think he really wants to get back together with you? Have you ever thought that after you get back together, you may be completely different, he will treat you very well, and you will love each other very much, have you ever thought about it?"

"..." Wen Hao was silent for a while, then nodded, "Thought about it. But it's impossible, I don't trust him anymore, and his family won't allow it, anyway, it's impossible for me to get back together with him."

Liu Yang nodded as he listened, and wrote something quickly in his notebook, until finally he focused on it, he raised his head: "It's almost time for dinner, let's go here first, and we'll talk again in a few days. "

"Anything else?" Wen Hao was surprised.

"What? Don't you want to see me?" Liu Yang showed a sad expression.

Wen Hao shook his head: "I just thought it would be enough to talk about it once... I have no experience in this field, sorry, I don't know."

Liu Yang smiled: "Not only next time, but next time, you can come to me whenever you want to chat."

Dinner was Chinese food for Ye Shuwen's treat, because they were not sure when they would come back, so they didn't go to the cafeteria to order food.

During the meal, no one asked Wen Hao what he said in detail, and Liu Yang didn't say anything. Everyone mainly talked about this year's Olympic Games.A countdown calendar has been hung up in the conspicuous places of the athletes' apartment and training center. There are still more than 190 days left, which is about half a year. The red numbers are decreasing day by day. nervous.

After the meal, Wen Hao went to pay the bill secretly, asked the coach and seniors to wait for him, and didn't consciously order the bill, which was too ignorant.

Ye Shuwen wanted to pay the bill after eating, but was told by the waiter that the bill had already been paid, so he said a few words to Wen Hao.Wen Hao smiled with a normal expression, which relieved Ye Shuwen who had been worried all afternoon.

After eating, everyone separated. Ye Shuwen took the time to ask Liu Yang what was going on. Liu Yang said, "I have professional ethics, so don't ask me."

Ye Shuwen stared: "You don't need to say what it is, just tell me whether Wen Hao's situation is good or bad."

Liu Yang frowned: "It's not very good. One time is not enough, we need to talk a few more times."

Ye Shuwen grabbed Liu Yang's hand and patted it: "Brother, it's up to you."

Liu Yang snorted: "The treatment fee will be paid from you!"

"I still need money!" Ye Shuwen wailed!

After separating from everyone at the gate, Wen Hao went straight back to the dormitory. Yuan Zheng was lying on the table writing something, when he saw him enter the room and looked back, he asked, "Are you all right?"

"What?" Wen Hao didn't understand.

"Lele told me that Liu Yang is a psychologist. When you meet alone, Lele is a little worried."

Wen Hao smiled: "Don't worry, I will tell him when I see him."

Yuan Zheng thought for a while, then turned around a bit: "What's the matter, if you want, you can also talk to me."

Wen Hao's smile became more intense, knowing that with Yuan Zheng's taciturn personality, being able to say these words meant he really cared about him, so he nodded: "Don't worry, it's not a big deal, it's just a conversation."

Yuan Zheng nodded, turned around, and continued to bury his head in writing.

Wen Hao took the tablet and skillfully clicked on the icons on the screen, and suddenly the scene of the afternoon appeared in his mind.In the afternoon, he really said a lot, and when he thought about it carefully, he didn't know what he said specifically, but he was sure that he really went all out, and poured out all the things that had been suppressed in his heart for those years. said it.

why?

Is it because of strangers?

Or is it because of the recommendation of the coach?

Or, is it because he wants to change himself?

In short, with Gong Cheng's return, the pressure on him from the opponent is increasing. However, the Olympics is coming soon, and he also wants to break through himself and get a good result, so will he work hard to cooperate?

But... what can this change?Gong Cheng is the source, if he doesn't give up there, his own pain can only continue to exist.

That night, Liu Yang went back to sort out his notes. Looking at the messy things he wrote down at that time, his brows frowned.

The penguin icon on the computer jumped up, and a call request was sent to him, and he pressed the agree button.The lover's face appears on the screen with a bright, washed blue sky in the background.

"Baby, what's the matter? Looking frowning?" Yao Ye asked him.

Liu Yang said: "I went to meet an athlete today and talked all afternoon. It was the first time I encountered such a difficult thing to judge. I think he wanted to tidy himself up. He cooperated very well, which also shows that Part of the problem. But at the same time, I found that something caught him subconsciously, and he seemed to be struggling."

Yao Ye raised his eyebrows.

Liu Yang said: "In other words, the imprint on him by the other party is too deep, er... it is his former love object, they have known each other since they were very young, that person may have left too deep marks in his heart, deep He got used to it and didn’t think there was a problem with him.”

Yao Ye nodded, indicating to continue.

Liu Yang considered it for a while, and said uncertainly: "Or, it's like the nobles in ancient times and the family had children. The nobles are always on top, and the family's children themselves, children, and children's children are all given to this family. They are used to it. Survival without even realizing that you are being ruled by the other party."

Yao Ye was stunned, and raised his forehead: "It's too complicated, so what's the conclusion?"

Liu Yang said: "Being ruled and branded as a slave, now he wants to struggle out, but he is powerless. It can even be said that he has a deeper and more complicated emotion for the person who ruled him than hatred."

"Love...?"

"I don't know." Liu Yang shook his head, thinking that this man would survive in modern times, and even become a world swimming champion, which is simply too weird.What a contradictory person, pitiful and lovely, strong and fragile, it almost makes people feel that his existence itself is a miracle.As for the person who created him, it’s fine if he didn’t realize it. Once he realizes it, how can he let go of the strong emotion of loving himself as the only one and as a “god”?Or, already aware of it?Will use all kinds of means to compound.

After that, Wen Hao met with Liu Yang several times. Later, Liu Yang even established a psychological consultation room in the west building of the athlete's apartment, providing free psychological consultation for the athletes.

Liu Yang, Ye Shuwen, and many retired national team members returned to the place where they grew up during the Olympic year, silently serving as volunteers, radiating all their light and heat.

Winter is over, spring is here, and the temperature is gradually rising.

Liu Yang called Wen Hao to his consultation room today. Wen Hao finished his day's training and passed away obediently after dinner.

The psychological consultation room was as quiet as ever. Liu Yang was sitting behind the desk writing something. There was a faint fragrance in the room, which Liu Yang said could make people relax.

Seeing him coming in, Liu Yang put down his pen and stood up, and the two sat side by side on the sofa like friends.

Wen Hao asked: "Do you want to talk today?"

He met Liu Yang no less than five times these days, and each time he chatted with him. The memories of the past were part of him, as well as his expectations for the future, his views on the Olympics, and of course some targeted questions. The questions will also be sharp and make him think for a long time before he can give an answer.But he didn't hate meeting Liu Yang, especially when he felt relaxed after confirming that he had told the secret, he knew that these treatments were effective.

Liu Yang held a notebook in his hand and smiled at him: "Today I want to tell you that the first course of treatment is over. I want to tell you some problems I found. You can choose to believe me or question me. You should be clear that the process of psychotherapy is to let us constantly face the problem and then solve the problem, so we can only peel it off layer by layer patiently, and finally find the problem.”