Infinite Love ∞

M, who had never shared a bed with anyone, fell asleep with a restless mood.Too much attention to the breathing beside him made him a little half asleep.I don't know how many times I turned over, but I still couldn't ignore the strong presence of the person behind me.Just when his head was in a coma and he was about to lose consciousness, M felt a sudden shock in his body.

I thought it was a hypnic jerk just before falling asleep, but it was a natural physiological phenomenon and I didn't take it seriously.But every minute, the mattress under him seemed to shake and tremble again, and M's nearly sinking thoughts gradually surfaced again.

Earthquake?

M half-opened his eyes in confusion, staring at the dim room in front of him. It seemed to be in a stable state, and he didn't hear any shaking of objects.Still thinking about what was going on because of dizziness just now, there was a groan buried under the quilt from behind.

"M...uh..."

At this moment, M clearly felt that the quilt behind her was being pulled away, and then she turned to face the person next to her pillow that night.

S's face was half buried in the pillow, holding the quilt with his hands, kicked his feet into the air a few times, and his body began to keep trying to get into the pillow. The whole figure was like a shrimp that fell into the boiling water. His body whimpered in the quilt and made an incomprehensible sound.

"Uh, M, go away...you don't, ah!"

S pushed forward with both hands, and pushed the quilt to M's chest. Instead of pushing M away, he pushed his body back a little, and some of his body ran out of the bed. This is probably because S often sleeps on the floor. s reason.

"M..."

S raised one hand and waved it randomly in the air, his expression could not be seen clearly in the dimly lit room.From the intermittent sobbing, he felt that he was not having any sweet dreams, but rather flustered.

How to wake up the person in the dream at this time?Shake him vigorously to wake him up?Pinch his face?Call him loudly?

A bunch of strange thoughts raced through M's mind as to how to react to someone talking in his sleep, but he couldn't choose a good answer.

"S, hey."

"Uh... go away..."

In the end, M chose to pat S's face, getting used to the dim light in the dark, he could vaguely see S frowning, and raised his hand weakly to pat the palm of M's cheek.

"Wake up, S!"

M slightly raised the volume, and without even thinking about holding S's hand that was half-waving in the air, S suddenly opened his eyes!He stared straight ahead with a stunned look on his face.Still not subsided from the tension, only the sound of his vigorous breathing was heard in the quiet room, and his chest was obviously heaving up and down.

"Are you having a nightmare?"

"..."

S blinked, and looked at the expressionless face in front of him in confusion, probably forgetting that he slept in an unfamiliar place today, and his head was a little confused.His eyes wandered around the room to confirm where he was, and then he relaxed his brows slightly. M slowly lowered S's hand between the two of them, spread his fingers to brush back S's fringe scattered on his face, and smoothed his hair as if grooming a pet.

"It's okay, it's just a dream." The heat from the hair made S stunned for nearly half a minute, and it wasn't until M stopped that S woke up a little.

"Sorry for waking you up...I'm going back to my room, hiss."

S propped up his upper body and lowered his head to rub his nose, turning his body sideways and trying to get out of bed.The next moment, S felt the warm palm pressing on the top of his head, making him stop.

"S, please calm down, I remember there is still milk in the refrigerator."

M stood up from the other side of the bed, put on the glasses placed beside the bed, turned on the small light in the kitchen and walked directly to the kitchen. M bent over and took out the opened milk carton from the refrigerator door and put it on the counter, rummaged through the dried dishes for the mug that was used at dinner time, and heard the milk being poured into the mug .

"Huh..." S sighed and sat on the edge of the bed hunched over, staring at the closed shutters in a daze.There was the hum of a microwave oven running behind me. It was two o'clock in the morning.

"what……"

S held the warm mug with both hands, licked the white beard above his lips, and looked satisfied after drinking the warm milk. He looked the same as usual, smiling like he was about to start mischief at any time.But after all, he woke up in the middle of the night, still with a bit of sleepy laziness.

"Is that why you can't sleep at night?"

"Almost?" S smirked and scratched his face, watching M sit down beside him.

"You don't have to smile like that if you're tired."

As soon as these words came out, S slightly suppressed his smile and was stunned for two seconds. Although this expression was fleeting, it still accidentally revealed the mask that he tried to wear a smile even at this time.

This man is both real and false.

It was like a box that was already held in the hands, it was indeed in front of the eyes, and the weight of his existence could be felt in both hands.But it can't be opened, and there is no sound when shaking, and there is no hint to guess what is inside.

"Usually I would say it calmly, I thought I could live in peace with this dream."

S smirked and turned the cup in his hand, concealing his indifference to the nightmare, raised his head and drank the remaining milk at the bottom of the cup.

"Would it be better to say it?"

M pushed up his glasses, watched S put down the mug, and wiped it on his mouth with the back of his hand. S looked at the mug in his hand without saying a word, pursed his mouth, and gave a half-smile.Whenever M asks this question, S will hesitate.Although S said that it was out of not wanting to influence others, but this sense of distrust not being poured out made M feel a little annoyed.

"What if I want to know?"

I have never cared so much about the people around me, but why do I care so much about the person in front of me?I want to know more about this man, I want to know...the reason for his tears.

S raised his head and met M's eyes, took a deep breath and then let out a long sigh.

"It was a dream of... a person who left or passed away from me and disappeared again."

S spoke slowly.

"I'm on a bridge with those people, as long as I walk past them, they will fall from the disintegrating bridge behind me, but I can only go forward. Sometimes I look back to save them, and I just I'd just slide down and then I'd hang on to the edge of the bridge. I'd always wake up the moment I fell or fell on a bridge, hahaha."

Perhaps trying to balance the heavy atmosphere, S deliberately made fun of himself. M couldn't bring up a smile at all, and listened seriously.

"The faces of those people became blurred every year, and I got used to it later." S scratched his neck and grinned awkwardly.

"But you just looked scared."

"Well... there was an extra person in the dream, but...but I really didn't want to see that person disappear. I stood where I was and asked that person to run, but he didn't move, and I didn't dare to move forward. It keeps breaking, I don't know what to do... I don't know what to do."

S looked at the cup in his hand, although he still had a smirk on his face, he couldn't hide his intermittent speech, and even whimpered a few words out of tune. M noticed that S's nose was a little red, and felt sad but didn't know what to say to comfort her.His work and rest have always been regular, and he has heard other people say that he can't sleep well. He can't understand what it feels like to be constantly haunted by nightmares.

It's no wonder that he wants to seek peace, he can't sleep well, it must be very uncomfortable.

M hesitated to speak, it seemed that it was wrong to say anything to comfort her at this time, any words would not make the other party sleep better.Seeing that the person beside him didn't dare to raise his head, as if he was afraid of being seen with his current expression, he covered his side face with his disheveled bangs. S rubbed his nose vigorously, as if to help himself or to divert his attention.Maybe this can be excused as nasal allergies, and the out-of-pitch just now was just a mishearing. Before S even spoke, M had already figured out a way to help him get down the stairs.This person obviously looks good at guessing, but he can't guess the deepest part no matter what.

M reached out and took S's head over and rubbed the back of S's head, S's chin rested naturally on M's shoulder, looking at the dim living room in front of him.

"S, you're just exhausted, I just kept sleeping behind you."

"……Um."

S smiled and closed his eyes, feeling the brief tranquility.

At this time, hugs may be better than words.

The next morning, the sunlight that sneaked in through the blinds fell on S's calves one by one, and he was lying crookedly on the bed with his pillows in his arms. It seemed that his sleeping position was not very good.At this time, M had already got up and pulled the collar of his shirt in front of the mirror.Maybe it was because of waking up to appease S in the middle of the night. M felt that he couldn't wake up this day. After pressing the alarm clock, he sat on the edge of the bed in a daze for a while before starting to move, which made it a bit late to go out today.

M tidied up his coat and carried his briefcase, looked back at the seemingly stable person on the bed, and walked out the door.But no matter how small M's movements were when the iron door closed, the rattling sound of the door lock still alarmed S.

S dazedly opened his eyes, and grunted into the gap between the pillow and the bed and rubbed his feet, straightening his hind legs like a puppy stretching. S let go of the pillow and sat up cross-legged on the bed, looking aimlessly at the empty room.

"Um?"

S's gaze stayed on the dining table where a plate of ready-made sandwiches was placed, and they were cut into beautiful triangles diagonally. The transparent bowl next to it was filled with freshly washed red tomatoes with drops of water.It may be that I was worried about S getting up late, so I covered each of them with plastic wrap to prevent dust.And the purple hippopotamus doll sat in the middle of the dining table, and S looked at me and I looked at you for a while, before S noticed that the hippopotamus was holding a note in his hand.

I shouldn't be late, I'll get to the office first...

After walking out of the apartment, M walked straight to the entrance of the subway, planning the order in his mind to start working after entering the office. Every morning, he started like this, just like his life full of plans, and he was also in his mind anytime, anywhere. Create action blueprints one by one, and no mistakes are allowed.

"Ah, bad."

M stopped, looked down at the briefcase, seemed to remember something, then turned around and walked back, striding back to the apartment downstairs.

Just now I was thinking about going out quickly, and I forgot about that thing...

M quickly recalled the place where the item was last placed in his mind, hoping to take it out as quickly as possible to go to work.He returned to the door of the apartment, turned the key precisely to unlock the door, and quickly pushed the door open.

"what."

S, who was sitting at the dining table, suddenly raised his head and saw M open the door and come in without warning. Their eyes met for a moment.

S was frightened, and M was worried.

Sitting at the dining table, holding the hippopotamus doll in both hands, the golden eyes are full of tears, two tear streaks ran across S's cheeks, because he raised his head quickly, the tears fell on the table, and the eyes and nose were naturally Bright red. S was surprised to see M come back, lowered his head in a panic, wiped his tears with both hands in confusion, turned his head and wiped his face on his shoulders and sleeves habitually.

M felt a soreness in his chest, and he couldn't explain whether it was because of S's sadness, or panic because of astonishment, and more emotions were an indescribable clamor. M found that since he and S have been together for a long time, this chaotic emotion has become more and more obvious. He who has always been calm does not know what makes him have such incomprehensible emotions in his heart.

M began to wonder if he had overlooked something?How could it make him cry like this?And when it is out of his sight, such a person is crying, does he often look like this?Passing through one chaotic thought after another, M went straight to S and squatted down beside him.

S was still wiping his cheeks with his hands, rubbing his eyes, trying hard to wipe away the tears, leaning his body on the back of the sofa chairs lined up next to the dining table.If he is really a small dog, he must be hiding under the sofa by now.

"S, are you having nightmares again?" M, who was squatting in front of S, looked up at S's eyes with seriousness and anxiety.

"No, no, no! You, why did you run back?"

S waved his hands violently, forced an extremely unnatural smile, and tried to look at M with normal eyes and speak.But the wetness in the eye sockets can't hide anything at all, even though he has tried his best to show his usual appearance.

"Forget this."

It has always been placed on the seat table opposite S, M picked up the booklet on the table and put it into the briefcase, then turned his eyes back to S's face.This weepy little animal had to be a priority over rushing to work.

"Still afraid of yesterday's nightmare?"

"I just said it's okay! You go to work now!"

S turned his head sideways, trying to avoid M's eager gaze, while waving his hands to dismiss M, but the tears fell down S's face one by one, and his chin trembling uncontrollably, it seemed that this had already happened. It is the limit of S. S shrank his hands between his legs and did not dare to move. He lowered his head and aimed at M's legs, wanting to confirm whether M left, so that he could get rid of this embarrassing state.

M looked at S who kept dodging, which made his chest very depressed.

From childhood to adulthood, no matter whether it is studying or taking exams, he can easily pass the test and get a high score; his habitual exercise has made him physically strong and enviable; he demands perfection, and of course he completes his work precisely and neatly.Everything is easy for him to overcome.

But now, M tasted a sense of loss called frustration.

Obviously I am here, why don't you call for help?I'm ready to pull you, why are you unwilling to reach out!

M sighed and stood up helplessly, while S thought that M was going to turn around and leave, so he slightly raised his head.In the next second, there was a burst of warmth from S's shoulder, and his cheek was directly pressed against M's stomach. M reached out and hugged S's shoulders, pulling him tightly into his arms. He felt that S shrugged his shoulders nervously, bent his elbows and was about to push him away, but M locked his hands even tighter to prevent him from letting him go. escape.

"S, I don't know what you're enduring, you just cry if you don't want to say it."

"I just……"

S' voice was sobbing that he was almost speechless, and he wiped the tears that kept falling with the back of his hand back and forth, as if he couldn't wipe them off no matter how hard he tried.

"Well, what's wrong?"

M also tried to suppress the anxiety in his heart, and asked in a calm and gentle tone.If even he is not calm at this time, the situation will probably get worse.

"It's been a long time... It's been a long time since anyone made breakfast for me."

In the hand of the hippopotamus doll on the table is a note left by Zhang M, with the words "Remember to eat" written neatly.

Like a crying child, S reluctantly finished speaking in a weak falsetto, and made fun of himself with a smirk.

And this answer is heart-piercing. It is a simple thing in the eyes of ordinary people: a breakfast.For S, it could actually move him to tears. M was still thinking that it was just out of habit that he would stop by to prepare his meal when the two of them were around, and S would have such a big reaction, which was completely beyond his expectation.

This situation is like the time when S helped him repair the monitor in the art gallery, M just encouraged him a little and made S burst into tears.But this time, because he took more care of him, the loneliness he had accumulated in his heart collapsed directly. M has no way of knowing the pain of S losing his family, how hard it is.With him like this, no matter how beautifully he uttered consolation, it still couldn't fill the vacancy in the other party's mind.

The only thing he can do now is try not to let S be alone.

"You can also come over for breakfast every morning, if you wake up."

"Damn, haha..."

S was crying and laughing, with a stubborn and complicated expression. He lowered his head and pulled up the collar of his T-shirt with his hand to wipe his tear-wet face.

Usually it looks like you don't care about anything, but now it seems like it will shatter if you touch it...

M let go of his hands, and squatted down supporting S's shoulders in order to see S's expression that refused to lift up.

"I'm sorry, I want you to sleep more, go out without waking you up. I will come back to cook in the evening, and then we will have dinner together."

"What, what are you sorry for, you are almost late! Hurry up and go to work!"

S sniffed, pulled up the corner of his mouth when he was playing with M, and shouted at M, and didn't stop trying to put on the mask.But M can only look worriedly at the tears still hanging from the corners of S's eyes, but he still insists on playing tricks. M found that this was what S would show every time he was anxious: he used exaggerated words to cover up his uneasiness.It's obviously a shivering small dog that's been scared for a long time, but it still uses non-threatening barking to scare away the threat in front of it. Sometimes it's really angry and funny to watch...

M wiped S's face with his thumb, causing S's eyes to narrow together. M pushed back the hair that was stained with tears on S's face, put his hands on S's head, and stared straight into S's eyes.

"Call me if you need something."

"...Let's go now."

M looked at S for a few more seconds, and watched S gradually calm down before getting up and going out.Before leaving, he did not forget to remind S to close the door of his house when he went out, and S complained about his old mother's personality by the way.

It wasn't until S heard the sound of the door closing that he picked up the sandwich and took a big bite. While chewing, S stared blankly at the dust in the air flying back and forth in front of his eyes. After swallowing the food in his mouth, he slowly put his hands on the table.

"It's really... so happy that it's scary."

Tears, mixed with sunlight, slipped down again secretly.

After days of busy work, S had a pleasant day.He stayed in M's room in the morning, rolled around on M's bed after breakfast, lazily occupied a large bed and watched TV from a distance; In a film rental shop to see what new products are available recently; in the evening, standing by the easel by the sea, with a cigarette in his mouth and a paintbrush in his hand, he sketched the ocean with a relaxed expression, adding some color.

Suddenly, the mobile phone in the pocket of his trousers vibrated, causing goosebumps to spread from his thighs to his neck. After all, no one usually looks for him, and he is not used to the slight numbness around his legs.

"Hey, what text is this guy sending at work?"

Seeing the sender's name, S couldn't help but smile, and wondered if he should help with shopping or something.He was guessing in his mind what good food M would prepare for him for dinner, and he clicked on the message on his phone full of anticipation. S's smile was like the waves in the sea; slowly disappearing on the shore.

"S, I'm sorry to be left behind for a meeting temporarily, you have to remember to go to dinner yourself. 』

Looking at the two lines of cold text on the phone screen, the expectation in his heart was instantly turned into smoke. S put down his brush, looked at the sea and squatted down.

"It can't be helped, it's because of work..."

S leaned his face on the arms wrapped around his knees, picked up the remaining half of the cigarette in his mouth, and threw it into the wave tail bubble in front of him.The flame of the cigarette butt went out instantly, and the pipe was rolled up and down by the sea water. S sighed heavily, watching the sunset slowly descend like a big yellow egg yolk, the waves on the shore beat back and forth, and the rhythm of the sea water was getting faster and faster for some reason... The water level gradually climbed to S's feet, until his pair of canvas shoes that had been worn to gray were splashed, and S stood up and patted his buttocks.

"Let's go drink."

S raised the easel with one hand and leaned against the boulder behind him. The newly added strokes have not yet formed, showing a blurred gray shadow on the screen. S stepped on the slippery path when he came up, leaving his secret base.

When M returned to the apartment, it was already 08:30 in the evening, more than three hours later than usual. M put down the briefcase and saw the hippopotamus doll still on the dining table in a cheating posture, with a new note stuffed in his mouth. M raised the corners of her mouth and smiled, then reached out and took out a note: "Next time I want tuna omelets." 』The corner of the note also drew a small bent fish jumping out of the water.

M later collected these small notes one by one, and pasted them separately in a blank notebook.I thought that if I accumulated a certain amount, I would show it to S, and let S know the talent I possessed. M sometimes regrets that S didn't save the first few pictures when he first started playing the message game, only the pictures on his phone are left, but that can never compare with the temperature of the real thing.

"In that case, I have to tell S."

M walked out of her house and stood in the corridor, and knocked on S's door a few times, but no one responded.

not here?It's time to go on a night tour again.

M went back to the room and dialed the phone on the mobile phone, then paced back and forth in the living room.

"Hello? S, sorry..."

M apologized to S as soon as he opened his mouth. He knew that he didn't cook for him when he came back as he told S in the morning.This made him very restless during the meeting, constantly looking forward to the end of the meeting as soon as possible.But Murphy's Law often comes into effect at this time, the more anxious the expectation, the more counterproductive it is.In the end he couldn't make it back in time for dinner.

A high-decibel laugh came from the other end of the phone, telling M that he was okay, which made M feel guilty.He already knew this person's response pattern, and now he was probably pretending nothing happened.But it just so happens that the other party is not around now, otherwise it would be better to make some supper for him...

He obviously didn't want to leave him alone.

"The exhibition you wanted to see is about to start. I have to work overtime these days."

"Can you take care of yourself?"

"Drink less, don't you get gastroenteritis?"

"It could last a week or more I'm not sure."

"I'll let you know when I'm done."

Every word and every word on the phone is concerned about the other end of the phone, even at work, I miss him from time to time. M simply thinks that this is just caring for a friend who is emotionally fragile, and the inner anxiety is just a side effect of busy work.

After hanging up the phone, M looked at the phone screen, only to realize that the surroundings had become completely silent. M raised his head and looked around; the turned off TV, the dim room, and the clean sink were full of the sense of sight when he first moved here.Without S's playful sound, his life is so quiet and monotonous.

Since when did I get used to having his voice?

"Are you free recently?"

"Clam?"

For several nights in a row, S stayed in the bar at [-] again, treating it as his own home as before, drinking at the bar. With his back to [-], S leaned against the bar counter, looking out at the people in the bar talking and drinking, or watching some people having fun on the dance floor, secretly making fun of those people's strange dances.

"You've been reporting on time this week."

"I've been working early shifts lately, so I have nothing to do at night."

"You're so afraid of loneliness that you won't have a girlfriend, aren't you too young?"

[-] lit a cigarette, and laughed inexplicably, so he spit the cigarette on the back of S's neck, which made S itchy. He knew that [-] was teasing him again, so he turned around vigorously to give [-] a punch. [-] backed away with a smile and dodged, with a treacherous expression that he couldn't possibly be hit.

"Fuck, who is lonely!"

S was a little drunk, and frightened at [-] with his mouth crooked.

"You're too noisy, and women will think you're not steady enough."

Still smiling, [-] shook his head at S. S stared at [-] with drooping eyelids and puffed cheeks, then raised his head and drank the glass of beer in his hand until it bottomed out, and jumped off the high chair on the bar to leave.

"The last drink price plus interest."

"Go ahead, I'll give it to you next time I get my salary."

S walked straight to the gate, still not forgetting to give [-] a middle finger.

"It's so simple, you life victory teams are so noisy!"

S biting his cigarette angrily, with his hands in his pockets, was walking along the streets of the city to go home. S childishly kicked the floor, raising the small stones on the ground!With a bang, the small stone just bounced onto the pickup truck passing by.

"Anyway, that's how I am..."

S stopped angrily and looked at the cracked floor tiles on the sidewalk. The part that was kicked out just now was probably part of this small crack.

"Don't kick stones when you're so angry! Come nail Guzhi!"

S looked up at the pickup truck that had passed by just now and was parked in front of it, and a familiar figure poked out from the driver's seat.

"Nail it!"

S smiled and moved forward, playfully punched Akai in the car, Akai opened his hand to block S's hand.At this time, Akai was wearing the uniform of the freight company, which seemed to be a coincidence at work.A Kai is a freight forwarder at S's part-time job. After a certain night shift, S casually asked A Kai if he wanted to go drinking together, and they became drinking buddies without knowing it.

"What time did you run today? Wait a minute, do you want to come to my house for a drink?"

"You've been drinking a lot lately."

"Do, do or don't say a word."

S giggled and lay on Akai's car window to invite, the sky was grayish purple after the sun went down.

In an exhibition room in a certain area of ​​the art museum, there is a messy appearance.Some workers are stepping on ladders to adjust electric lights, and some are carrying sculptures that have just been unloaded outside.From time to time, the crackling sound of nail guns can be heard in the space, and some people are making new space partitions, which seems to be very busy.

M discussed the progress and matters to be contacted with the foreman, took the calendar in his hand and ticked off the note boxes on the top one by one. in his plan. M likes to proceed step by step in everything. Only by doing so can he have a sense of stability and accomplishment.

After the discussion, the foreman went into the booth and shouted that his team was ready to call it a day, and the workers went out of the booth one after another. M looked at the display on his mobile phone, it was almost nine o'clock in the evening, and he could only leave around this time this week.

M stared at the screen for a few seconds, then decided to click on the communication button and make a call.

"Hi, this is everyone's S!"

"...Uh, what's the matter with you?" There was a harsh response as soon as the microphone was connected, and M was slightly startled by S.

S sat on the floor of his room, just opened a can of beer and was holding it in his hand, and there were several packs of snacks and appetizers on the floor.A Kai sat down beside S and opened the beer pull ring, reached out and touched the bottle with S, and started drinking without waiting for S.

"M, are you still at work?"

"Hey, look at this." Akai found the porn box next to S's small TV, took one casually and showed it to S, showing the cover of the box.

"Look, put it yourself." S was still holding the phone in his hand, and he was still talking to Akai, all of which were naturally heard by M.

"..." M was stunned on the other end of the phone, judging from the brief conversation that S should be watching another movie.

"are you at home?"

"Yup."

"Who is next to you?"

"Oh, Akai, did you watch it when I took you to drink? He said he wanted to watch "Temptation of a Wife", hahahahaha!" S laughed, and then S shouted from the phone : "Damn, kick fart!" 』I feel that S and Akai are having fun.

M's face was expressionless, facing S's inattention on the phone with him, he felt very uncomfortable, and the anger in his heart was slightly ignited.He was obviously not such an easily angered person before, what happened recently?

"S, I just want to tell you that I will finish my work next week." Enduring the displeasure in her heart, M said flatly.

"Isn't that great?! Congratulations."

"Have you eaten or slept these days?"

"Nonsense! It's just that I didn't hit Dongdong! Hahaha!"

Maybe it was because of the alcohol, S was in a high mood and was playing around on the phone all the time. M suddenly felt that his worries were superfluous. Even without him by his side, S was doing well, and someone even accompanied him to drink.As he is not good at drinking, he can't play with S like this, and M feels frustrated again.

M's heartbeat quickened. He thought that under such circumstances the conversation might not have any intersection, and because he was also a little tired after work, he decided to quickly end the topic.

"That's it."

"Uh?"

After finishing speaking, M hung up the phone without even saying good night. S looked at the phone that was suddenly hung up, he couldn't judge what mood M was in right now.The last sentence just now was very plain and emotionless, and it was M he didn't know.

"Just go to the middle and do it."

"Damn! Foreplay is my favorite! You don't want it!"

A Kai picked up the remote control to turn quickly, S leaned over to snatch the remote control back, and temporarily left the phone aside.Anyway, M will be back next week, and S feels rather happy.

And M stood alone in the exhibition room where everyone else got off work, her heart beat faster, and her breathing was also a little short of breath.Looking at the call time displayed in the phone's address book, it was only a short three minutes and 28 seconds.

What is this inexplicable feeling of irritability?