Lan Juan

I believe in Lan Juan, because I have seen an unfinished sketch of her. The figure on it is delicate and elegant, which is the Lan Ping in Liu Fang's mouth.

I didn't quarrel or quarrel. In the complicated emotions, I even had a bit of unspeakable joy. It seemed that I was closer to my mother because her lover was always with me. It turned out that she always gave me Some things are left behind.

However, most of the time, I'm not worth it for her, and I don't understand why she fell in love with such a woman.

Lan Juan didn't reveal more, so I spontaneously made excuses for her.Or Lan Ping's departure hit her too hard, so she lost her way; or she and Lan Ping separated because of hooliganism, and she wanted to play hooligan even more.I understand this kind of revenge-like psychology, so I have a little empathy for her.

But my revenge could not go on. I looked at my young girlfriend and always thought of Lan Juan and my mother, so I broke up with her.

I had the same experience with Lan Juan, she told me to wash my hands and eat, and I washed my hands and ate, without any disobedience.It's just that I clearly know that I can't live with her anymore. When I have nothing to say to her, the barrier cannot be resolved by words.

That day Lan Juan quarreled with Zhang Jiqiang again, and Zhang Jiqiang slapped Lan Juan, making her face tremble.When I was young, I was always worried that they would fight, afraid that I would be scared out of my courage, and afraid that I would not be capable enough to stand out.But when I actually saw Lan Juan being beaten, I was still terrified. I had grown up, but I didn't have the stand to stand up for her.

Fortunately, Zhang Jiqiang stopped immediately, and Lan Juan entered the room with him, where they quarreled quietly but fiercely.I could hear muffled voices through the door, as if they were covered by a pillow or filtered.

I heard Lan Juan accuse Zhang Jiqiang, saying that he is not a thing, and he gambles again, always gambles.

And Zhang Jiqiang said that he wanted to accompany those bosses and brothers again, in order to find a way to repay the debt.After earning some more money, I can buy a new color TV, a new phone, and a big mobile phone for my family.

It turned out that Zhang Jiqiang was not at home all the time, and he went to gamble. It turned out that his color TV was obtained from nightclubs with his brothers. No wonder Lan Juan didn't like it at all.

I also heard them talk about me.Zhang Jiqiang said, Lan Juan was not my proper guardian in the first place, and should have sent me to the orphanage a long time ago.

It turned out that Zhang Jiqiang was unwilling to raise me for a long time. After all, he didn’t have much friendship with my parents. For a long time, he didn’t talk about it, but he always cared about it in his heart. What’s more, I am not a well-behaved and caring child. On the contrary, I always look down on them, Zhang Jiqiang I am afraid that I have long been regarded as a white-eyed wolf in my heart.

It was hard for me to listen anymore, so I went back to the house with my schoolbag in my arms.

Two days later, Lan Juan bought me roast meat again, and said at the dinner table that she had an old classmate who was also a student of her mother, and now she was the leader of the health school, and asked me if I wanted to go.She said that graduates from health schools are still assigned jobs.

I discussed it with Lan Juan earlier, because my mother is very knowledgeable, so I want to go to high school and take the university entrance exam. Not so popular anymore.

Lan Juan also said that the opportunity is very good. If I want to go, she will help me to withdraw from school, and then I will repeat my studies for half a year with my junior high school status. My grades are not bad, and I will definitely be admitted to the medical school.

She spoke well, but I knew she didn't want me anymore.

She violated the agreement with me, and also violated my mother's expectations.She felt that what Zhang Jiqiang said was reasonable, that raising me was a burden, but she was not willing to send me to the orphanage, so she thought of a compromise.She may even think that if she doesn't put more energy on me, maybe her relationship with Zhang Jiqiang can be repaired.

Before Lan Juan made the proposal, I did spend two days tossing and turning. I kept assuming and looking for clues to refute it. I even thought that Lan Juan went for birth control without a child. Take good care of it.

But I overestimated the weight of me and Lan Ping in her heart, maybe the incident I had a few days ago chilled her to some extent; maybe she didn't know how to face me.

The day of leaving Lanjuan was also in the summer, and I was admitted to the health school as she thought, in a neighboring city.That day I received a registered letter of admission, and I opened the door to tell Lan Juan. She sat on the bed silently, looking out the window like a log.

Maybe she was also a little sad, Lan Ping must have said to her that she hoped that I would go to college or something.

Then she got up and packed for me, and there was a whole summer vacation, but she started packing from that day on.She put away the nightdress I was wearing and put on the newly made underwear, folded and unfolded, unfolded and folded again.I recalled the scene when she changed my clothes for the first time. At that time, she was only in her early twenties, and she was in a hurry, and she didn't know where to put her eyes.

She followed her as she boarded the train, her perfume mingling with the sweat and foot odor of the noisy crowd.Zhang Jiqiang also came to see me off. He helped me pile two large suitcases of luggage on the luggage rack, took out a cigarette but didn’t smoke it, put it on my ear, and said, “Study hard, little plane, study hard, and make progress every day. "

This seemed to be one of the few educated words he had said. Lan Juan didn't make a sound. She smoothed my collar for me, wiped the table again, asked where the hot water and toilet were, and then said on the radio got out of the car.

She didn't watch me off like in the movie, she just said a few words to Zhang Jiqiang on the platform, and before the train started, she wrapped herself in a thin coat and turned around to leave.

The roar of the train is magical, it always renders the sadness of parting, I sat on the car and wiped my tears for no reason, but only wiped it two or three times.

Afterwards I consoled myself that I had finally left her.