Epigenetic edge

Chapter 9 Sharp

Ye Shenyi's back stiffened, he was nailed to the spot, and he didn't even dare to turn his head.Of course he knew what he did shouldn't be, but he didn't want to die in pain in the hospital at all.

Echizen Nanjiro looked at the boy who suddenly turned against him. He sighed and took a step back: "Escaping won't solve the problem. Come out and explain it to me."

Ye Shenyi stood with her head down for a long time before gathering enough courage to go out and face Echizen Nanjiro.

Echizen Nanjiro sat on the stool, he pointed to the bed: "Sit over, rebellious boy, can you tell me why you did this?"

Ye Shenyi sat over obediently, without saying a word.He hung his head, his long hair blocked his face, and he looked like he was refusing to cooperate.Echizen Nanjiro was speechless impatiently: "Yakami-kun, is this how you treat people who care about you? The old woman knows..."

"Don't tell her." Ye Shenyi begged softly.

Echizen Nanjiro nodded: "Give me a reason."

Ye Shenyi stopped talking again, Echizen Nanjiro was not going to give him any more time to struggle, he stood up neatly and was about to leave.Ye Shenyi was so frightened that he quickly grabbed him: "Senior."

"Ah, I hate doing useless things the most." Echizen Nanjiro twitched his hand, but didn't twitch.Ye Shenyi held him tightly, the joints turned white with force.He had lost a lot of weight, and his face was less bloody, and he looked like a thin shadow in a hospital gown.

Echizen Nanjiro grabbed his wrist and pulled it down: "Young man, I will be very distressed if you do this."

Ye Shenyi has nothing, if he really has something that belongs to him now, it is probably a little bit of care from the person he loves.When you don't see it, you don't need extravagance, but once you see it and get it, how can you let it go.Ye Shenyi is reluctant and cannot lose, so even if it is to dig out the deepest shadow in her heart, as long as that person can stay, then it is all right.

"Don't!" Ye Shenyi stretched out his other hand to grab Echizen Nanjiro when his fingers were detached from Echizen Nanjiro's palm.

"I...I don't want to die in pain..." His face was pale, his cheeks twitched uncontrollably, and even his lips were trembling.He held Echizen Nanci's clothes, as if he was holding his salvation, and it seemed that it was the only thing that could support him.

"I have seen it with my own eyes. These medicines are useless, they will only increase unnecessary pain, and they will not save people. My father, mother, they are all..." Ye Shenyi trembled uncontrollably. At first, Echizen Nanjiro realized that his face was bloodless, almost transparent white.

Ye Shenyi's voice was hoarse, and he said excitedly: "It's useless. What's the use of living longer with chemotherapy? What's the difference between a month and a year? What's the point of living a little longer? In the end, you're still going to die." Yes. It’s better to end it sooner than tormenting the pain continuously. The constant struggle will only make myself and the people around me endure longer and deeper pain. I don’t want to… I don’t want to be in such pain…”

Echizen Nanjiro was silent, he looked at the red-eyed young man, and found that the patient who had always been safe was actually more scared than anyone else.This year, Ye Shenyi is so young, she should be the most innocent and fearless age without any worries.But in fact, he has endured too much that a child of this age should not bear.Fate might be really unfair, at least he was too harsh on Ye Shenyi.It was so harsh that he was in pain and fear, and he didn't even have a single person he could tell and trust.

That was the first time Echizen Nanjiro took the initiative to hug Yagami Yi.He leaned down and pressed Ye Shenyi's face into his arms, and gently rubbed his head as if to comfort him: "Young man, if you don't give up, you may be able to survive forever. If you give up, you will never have another chance. Just like tennis , A man who forfeit at the beginning of the game can't win the ball."

Ye Shenyi suddenly felt that she was about to be buried in sadness.Life and death are too heavy, love and hate are too tormented.

He loves this person, but this person does not belong to him.He scolded himself for being greedy, but he was reluctant to part with the warmth he had absorbed from Echizen Nanjiro.This world is so big, and there are so many people in the world, but none of them belong to him.He didn't ask for anything when he had nothing, and how could he have no desires and desires when he fell in love with someone.But no matter how much he wanted it, he still couldn't get it.

He wants to live, but it is impossible to live well.He loves him and it's impossible to be with him.There is really nothing in his life that is worthy of his lingering, desperate to live on.

Echizen Nanjiro tore away the gentle and calm skin that Ye Shenyi was wearing on his body, revealing the fuzzy flesh and blood inside.Ye Shenyi couldn't keep pretending anymore, he suddenly pushed him away and stood up, almost gnashing his teeth: "But I have already lost, and there is no chance of a tie-break in 6:0. What choice do I have other than to make myself look good when I lose! Do you take those medicines and then lose your hair and keep vomiting and pain? So what?

I'm still in pain, every day, every night, I can't sleep because of the pain.I ate and tried to swallow, but the medicine made me spit it out even more uncontrollably.Disgusting and embarrassing!In the end, when I lost all my hair and vomited until I couldn't eat anything, I would lie on the bed, skinny with only a handful of bones, ugly like a skeleton covered in human skin, and exude the breath of the dead.But I am still alive.

Even if I become a bone that can only move around in a wheelchair and eat through a soft leather tube, I am still alive!Do you understand that feeling?Have you ever been in pain?Do you know what it feels like to have your flesh and blood cut to pieces?I'm always...always in pain...but I'm...no one knows...my mother cried to my father, and my father said to me, what can I do?Every day, every day is suffering for me, I want to get rid of it earlier, is it wrong? "

Echizen Nanjiro was stunned for a moment, he was always gentle and gentle, as if he had no edges, but his bones were sharp and piercing.Probably this feeling of losing control made Echizen Minamijiro face up to this junior, and he put him in a position where he could get along with each other on an equal footing.

Echizen Nanjiro said: "Young man, you still have a chance. It's because you don't want to live."

What a frightening insight.

Ye Shenyi's face was pale, he sneered, and pushed back the broken hair on his forehead, revealing his white forehead.He was a little thinner, his chin was sharper, and his smile was more cold. He looked at the window, and the sun was shining on the window sill.He said lightly: "It's probably too boring. Living is a very boring thing. If you can live well, you will live, and when life is too difficult, you don't want to struggle. Senior, you don't understand .”

A lot of people, most of the people in this world don't understand.Probably only those who have experienced what it’s like to live alone like a spirit floating in the world for more than ten years, and who feel that the future will still be lonely and sad can understand what it is like to have no life.

Nanjiro, I was alone for more than a dozen years, and I don’t know how long the years will be in the future. I can only embrace what you gave me and live.I thought I could do it, but then I realized it was too difficult and too painful.I'm probably not really a strong person, and I don't know what else I can expect in the world.People say that they are not afraid of death, so why should they be afraid of life.But living is harder than dying.

Echizen Nanjiro seldom thinks about the past, even less about Ye Shenyi, he often deliberately suppresses and forgets.But there are occasional times when you can't bear it and can't forget it.He thought about this day and this moment, and he wondered if Ye Shenyi would be able to get the calmness he wanted for at least the last time if he let go at that moment, and whether it would be easier for him to leave at least.

But in the end, no one can go back to the past, and no one can predict the future.

Echizen Minamijiro is a dream of Yagami Yi.Echizen Nanjiro personally wove a beautiful dream for Yagami Yi.It was he who personally shattered this beautiful dream.

Echizen Nanjiro stole Ye Shenyi out of the hospital.Yes, they sneaked out.Ye Shenyi had probably never done such a thing that disregarded the rules in her entire life. When she was dragged by Echizen Nanjiro and ran wildly for a while, she felt very happy, as if she had been released from some shackles.So he pursed his lips and chuckled.

Echizen Nanjiro covered his mouth in a hurry, quickly investigated the situation, and let him go only after making sure it was safe.Ye Shenyi's pale face turned bloody, and he covered his mouth obediently, as if it wasn't him who was gnashing his teeth before.

"Senior, I'm sorry."

Echizen Nanjiro waved his hand: "Don't worry so much."

He took out the bicycle and motioned Ye Shenyi to sit on it.Ye Shenyi sat on it for a while before remembering to ask, "Senior, where are we going?"

Echizen Nanjiro put his foot on the brake, pointed to the noisy place ahead: "Come on, let's get excited, boy."

Ye Shenyi looked vaguely at the brightly colored gate, full of childlike decorations, and a long line of gates—the amusement park.When I was young, it seemed that I had been here, but I was too young to remember.Later, my mother became more and more ill, and since then, I have never had the opportunity to go out and play easily.

The parties in the tennis club are either eating and drinking or tennis courts, and the amusement park is where children and girls gather.In this way, he is so unfamiliar with this place that he probably knows some common sense that everyone knows, and he probably doesn't know as much as a child from an elementary school.

Echizen Nanjiro parked his bicycle and dragged Ya Shenyi to line up to buy a ticket and enter the door.Ye Shenyi looked at the cartoon buildings and various entertainment facilities in a daze.Echizen Nanjiro handed over the map and strategy to Ye Shenyi: "Boy, where do you want to go?"

Ye Shenyi subconsciously wanted to hand over the decision-making power to Echizen Nanjiro, he looked at Echizen Nanjiro as if asking for help, but Echizen Nanjiro turned his head away, and began to lie to a passing child unscrupulously.Ye Shenyi couldn't help it, he grabbed Echizen Nanjiro's sleeve to rescue the children, and walked towards the queue for the roller coaster: "If you come to an amusement park, the roller coaster should be a must, right?"

"Ah." Echizen Nanjiro glanced left and right at the beautiful girls passing by, and said casually, "Is that so."

Ye Shenyi had a headache, turned around and covered Echizen Nanjiro's eyes with both hands.Perhaps it was Echizen Nanjiro's attitude that gave him the courage to be presumptuous: "They...they are not as good-looking as me, so walk well."

Echizen Nanjiro pulled Ye Shenyi's hand off, and stared straight at Ye Shenyi's chest: "Young man, don't be brave."

Ye Shenyi's earphones turned red, and suddenly felt itchy: "I don't have that kind of thing anymore!"

Echizen Nanjiro tilted his head, looking at the girl with a proud chest.Ye Shenyi grabbed his hand and left, not wanting to give him another chance to look at it.