every breath

Zhuang Yu clenched his fists tightly and looked into the distance, the last ray of sunset light had already disappeared in the sky, the color of the sunset glow gradually dimmed, and the first evening stars began to flash in the darkened sky.

The birds hurried back to the forest, but the river still flowed tirelessly.

The metal shell of the harmonica was warmed by his grip. He looked at the profile of Zhou Chuyao who was standing motionless in the night, and asked in a low voice:

"You still think of him now?"

She looked at the tree shadow in front of her, and said in a faint voice, "When I play "Green Sleeves", yes. That was the first song he taught me."

"I didn't know he could play the harmonica." He glanced at the harmonica in his hand, looking very nostalgic, "He never played it in front of me."

There were still so many things he didn't know, but that person just left like this, nowhere to be found.

He handed the harmonica back to Zhou Chuyao: "Since he gave it to you, you should take good care of it. I can't accept it."

She didn't reach out to take it: "You should keep it, it's a commemoration of coming to Yongchuan."

Although Zhou Chuyao always looked expressionless, she seemed to understand everything.Seeing her insistence on this, he had no choice but to take the harmonica back, and smiled wryly: "Okay, if no one can see it, it's good to get a souvenir."

Zhuang Yu put the harmonica in his pocket and walked slowly back along the field ridge.The road in Yongchuan is not complicated, even a stranger can tell the direction of his distant home without any difficulty.In the afterglow of the setting sun, he slowed down. He was not in a hurry to go back at the moment. Since he had witnessed the decline of the Qin family's old house and had a conversation with Zhou Chuyao, he just wanted to be alone to sort out his thoughts quietly.

But Qin Xuanyang's handsome face would always pop up in his mind unexpectedly, making him unable to think about anything.

"You bastard."

He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth.

"fraud."

In his mind, Qin Xuanyang smiled at him.

"It's a shame to laugh!"

He punched the void angrily.

"Where the hell are you!"

The anger accumulated for many days erupted at this moment, Zhuang Yu tore off his usually gentle face, and looked at the sky covered with gorgeous sunset glow with tears in his eyes.

The more beautiful the sky, the angrier he is.

"Qin Xuanyang, how long are you going to hide from me!"

He growled in a low voice, but got no response.

Only the sounds of cicadas and frogs that can be heard everywhere in summer echoed him from afar.

A gust of wind blew in the far sky, and he stood alone on the empty field ridge, feeling the coolness brought by the wind blowing over his face.He wiped away his tears, bowed his head and continued to walk in the direction of his home.

Maybe in the end, maybe everything is a futile effort, but how can I give up halfway.

After all, I don't know how to see you again.

After returning to Yuan's house, the brothers and sisters of Yuan's family seemed to have formed a kind of tacit understanding, and they stopped asking him where he went that afternoon, and what he talked about with Zhou Chuyao.Everyone still sat together and had a lively dinner. After the meal, Yuanchen invited him to go for a walk together, but he refused because he was tired.Back in the bedroom at the back of the house, he found the picture album he had brought from Yongchuan Primary School a few days ago, flipping through it page by page.

The immature and clumsy brushwork expresses a heavy and heartbreaking plot.

The phone rang suddenly, and he couldn't help sighing when he saw the two words lit up on the screen.

"Mom, what's wrong?"

"I can't call you if I have nothing to do?" The mother's voice was still so familiar, with the rhetorical question pattern that middle-aged women like to use, "I don't think you have called me recently, so I will call you. How is it, okay?"

"It's fine, nothing wrong." He looked at the vines climbing in the garden outside the window, and lied.

"Don't work too hard, pay attention to the balance between work and rest, and eat breakfast, lunch and dinner regularly..." On the other end, the long-winded mode was turned on again. My mother didn't know that he was in Yongchuan at this time, and thought he was still in the original city ​​work.He responded with a few words of um, ah, and a few more perfunctory words, and then planned to hang up the phone.

"By the way, that friend of yours is called Qin Xuanyang. Take him home for dinner when you have time. I haven't seen him in the past few years."

Zhuang Yu's body froze, and it took a long time before he replied in a low voice: "He... is busy and has no time."

"Young people shouldn't put all their energy on work. It's not good to work too hard. You still have to pay attention to your body."

"Understood, I will tell him." Afraid that if he continued speaking, the lump in his throat would betray his emotions, he hastily thought of an excuse and hung up the phone.

My heart was stuffy, as if something was clamoring.With a muffled voice, he lowered his head.

Taking out the harmonica in his pocket, he tried to play a few notes, but he couldn't get into tune, so he had to give up.

In what mood did the young Qin Xuanyang play the harmonica?

He gently rubbed the edge of the harmonica, imagining that his heart ached.

He slowly lay sideways on the bed, pressing his chest, and slowly closed his eyes.

In a trance, it seemed that someone was hugging him tenderly from behind, with his chest pressed against his back, and his hands on his waist.

Outside the window, it seemed to be raining again.

"Don't be too tired, boyfriend." The man's voice was still so soft.

He felt his eyes filled with tears again.

"Eat well, sleep well, and work well," the man continued.

Zhuang Yu didn't dare to act rashly, although he knew that all this was just his illusion.

"Where are you?" His voice was a little crying.

"I'm here." The man leaned against his ear and said softly.

Zhuang Yu couldn't help turning around, and the hallucination disappeared in an instant—the other side of the bed was a drowsy darkness, and there was nothing.

"Xuan Yang?"

There will be no response.

He clutched his chest tightly and closed his eyes, hoping that that person would appear again.

Just like that summer when he unexpectedly appeared in his own world.

Alasmylove, youdomewrong (ah, my love, you did me wrong)

Tocastmeoffdiscourteously (abandon me you are unjust and heartless)

Ihavelovedyouallsolong (I've been in love with you, ah, so long)

Delightinginyourcompany (how happy to be with you)

Greensleeveswasallmyjoy (Greensleeveswasallmyjoy)

Greensleeveswasmydelight (Greensleeveswasmydelight)

Greensleeveswasmyheartofgold (Greensleeveswasmyheartofgold)

AndwhobutmyLadyGreensleeves

——British folk song "Greensleeves"