[Misawa] Dear Mr. Fox

For a while, he had the same dream repeatedly every night.

The stadium in the center of the city was lit with snow-white lights, while in the night sky in the southwest, the thick night was turned rusty red by the lights of the city.He stood alone on the mound, surveying his surroundings, considering the necessary restraints, only to find that neither the runners on base nor his teammates remained as immobile as plaster statues.The auditorium was empty, the blue seats were like a desolate sea, and only one person stood in the center and applauded.Applause for him.The applause resounded through the bright and empty stadium, amplified by the echo of the seats, and amplified again.

Who is it?

He couldn't see clearly, and wanted to run closer, but he couldn't take a step.Because the only thing he can do is throw the ball.Throw your best shot.Let that guy see his best pitch.

That person has been looking at himself.

The sunshine at the end of October is mysterious and complicated, and the oblique angle of severe winter is mixed with the golden illusion of summer, which makes the glass of the airport hall clear.Sawamura arrived a little earlier than the scheduled time and stared at the big screen at the entrance of Starbucks for a while.Picking up people is a much better thing than seeing them off. He knows even if he has no experience in seeing them off. He even knows who are lucky people like himself in the hall at the moment. The anxiety and expectation are written in the smile on his face.The roar covered the sky and disappeared into the clouds.I don't know whether to take off or land.

The target flight landed safely.So Sawamura moved to the vicinity of the customs clearance passage and continued to wait, where he closed his eyes and thought about how to greet his childhood sweetheart whom he hadn't seen for a long time handsomely.When I first thought of the tenth type, I was suddenly knocked on the head.

"Why are you giggling here, idiot Eijun."

It's still a good way to say hello.Nostalgic good.

"It's so fierce when we meet, you really deserve to be Wakana."

He took the initiative to go up and take the luggage handle from the girl's hand.Wakana was stunned for a while.When did you become such a gentleman?It took her a while to realize that the figure in front of her was not Eijun who was surrounded by friends ten years ago.He was no longer her Rongchun.

"How was the last game?"

"Wakana, didn't you read the newspaper?! Although I fought bravely until the last moment, we still failed to win the championship. We agreed to participate in the World Series with Master. I am really not reconciled! I am not reconciled!"

"There's still next year and the year after next."

"What a cold response!"

But just like his tone, it is regrettable that no matter how big the hole is dug, new targets will fill it.And next year, the year after, and another year.Adjust, adjust, and fight again.

Sawamura was so happy that he almost fell off the bed when he just received the mail from his childhood sweetheart.The email was very long, and he read it several times, feeling happy and lonely at times.Wakaca said that she went to the United States in October to visit him, and stayed for two days, and then flew to New York to find her college classmates.well.As I said before, the wedding with my boyfriend is going to be held in April next year, and I asked him if he has time to come back to attend.In April, the season has just started, so it's probably not enough.Sawamura rolled over, half of his face sunk in the pillow.But after all, it's my childhood sweetheart's wedding, I want to go.

When Sawamura was still on the bench in the second army of professional baseball, Wakana also came to Tokyo to attend university, and made a boyfriend from the same school two years later.Afterwards, when the class reunion mentioned this matter, Kuramochi-senpai almost dismantled all the joints—why didn’t you tell me that Wakana came to Tokyo earlier, you bastard!In order to beg for mercy, he revealed another piece of information, saying that the boy was also a shortstop for the university team, and his voice and appearance were slightly similar to that of Kuramochi-senpai, so he passed the review immediately.As a result, I almost broke my neck before I finished speaking (although I have long been used to it).why.

But there was another thing before that, and it would probably be wiped out if it was said.

After dropping off his luggage at the hotel, he volunteered to take Wakaka on a boat trip on the Chicago River and Lake Michigan.Wakana said unhurriedly that she wanted to go to the place where Eijun played and practiced more than that.Even though it was a rest day, unfortunately, I ran into a few seniors who practiced hard on the practice field. Sawamura had to explain in broken English for a long time. This is not a girlfriend, but a childhood sweetheart. How do you say childhood English... Leisurely took his words, as expected of a top student who was admitted to a university in Tokyo, and his spoken language was smoother than that of a person who had been in the United States for more than half a year.

They all noticed the engagement ring on the girl's left ring finger and congratulated her.Sawamura just noticed.Shining in the sun, so eye-catching, so proud.It is very similar to the pendant on that person's neck under the lamp that day.

"Go to the boat, Wakana. It's almost too late to watch the sunset." He said suddenly.As soon as the words came out, those vague shadows in my mind spontaneously dispersed.

"What are you in a hurry for? Is it because you want to take a boat ride? You idiot."

"Not at all! Although I have never sat before. I have devoted myself to hard training and English learning since the first day I came here..."

"It's too weak. Look like a tour guide, please. Keep your voice down, and you're not a child."

Although the answer was blunt, Wakana let him go.The two came to the Michigan Avenue Pier, just in time for a cruise ship that was about to depart.At the end of October, there are far fewer tourists on the lake than in summer. As the autumn wind becomes gradually deserted, it may be frozen in a month or so.Even he hadn't seen frozen Lake Michigan.The two stood on the side of the deck where the building could be seen.Ruocai asked him the names of each building, but he only looked familiar and couldn't answer any of them.And no one told him on his morning jog.

"The Empire State Building."

"Huh? Chicago has the Empire State Building, too?"

Wakana's eyes were full of suspicion, but he didn't notice.The damp wind lifted the girl's shoulder-length hair, which made his face itchy.Wakana still had the short hair she had when she was in junior high school when she said goodbye in Tokyo last time, but it's different now.She said that she looks good in a wedding dress like this, and she wants to be the most beautiful bride.In April next year, it should be able to store up to the length of the plate.

The boat was approaching the mouth of the river when Wakana's cell phone rang.She took it out and looked at it, then put it away immediately, her brows were slightly frowned, but she couldn't help laughing.Continue to look at the scenery on the lake.

"That idiot, asked me if I was jet lagged, and if I fell asleep on the plane. Stop looking down on people. By the way, take a photo for me and send it to him."

"Then who has been thinking about you, you are such a nice guy, my vision is impeccable." Sawamura muttered while taking pictures.

"That's not it. The group of high school students brought by them entered the semi-finals again this year, and they just participated in Hagar, isn't it good? More importantly, he will take the initiative to text me and say, 'I hope you can watch by my side It's a world of difference from someone who grew up with me."

"You're so ashamed to produce and sell your own products...It hurts! Please let me go!" The instep of my foot was almost crushed by the high heels.

——I like Eijun.The kind of liking that is different from childhood sweethearts.

She said so to Sawamura on Valentine's Day in her first semester of college in Tokyo.I have imagined his answer countless times, for example, I can't be distracted when I play baseball now.For example, Wakana, you are a good person, but I have someone I like.But after reading so many girl manga, how can you be so emotionally dull?He was more flustered than she had imagined, and after holding back for a long time, he said something, I don't quite understand, this kind of thing.How about a date first?I dated a few times in a daze, and held hands, but I still feel much more at ease holding hands when I was a child.And more importantly, she discovered a secret that even Sawamura himself didn't know.In fact, she should have noticed it a long time ago, since Eijun returned from Tokyo five years ago and decided to go to Seidou.Eijun never told anyone who he met or what he saw that day.But from that day on, a vague voice in a corner of her heart told her that Eijun would not return to Nagano, nor would she return to her side.Never again.

They still date.Like a pair of close friends, watching baseball games and movies together, going to the bookstore to buy shojo manga magazines, and discussing the boys from other schools who are pursuing her recently.But she didn't tell him anything about him.Little revenge.

The profile of Sawamura depicted by the setting sun on Lake Michigan suddenly made her feel a little guilty.

"That guy, let me tell you about my family, is Miyuki-senpai's college junior. The two are still on the same school team. Did you mention this to you before?"

Yes, like this.You don't even realize it yourself.Even though they were hidden in several shadows of the setting sun, those eyes suddenly became bright.I had hoped before that if Eijun was just confused about feelings, maybe one day he would come back to me.But it's okay, it's already okay.

Now I just want to know, if this heart does have a home already, where is it?And why did you not return?

"The last time he came back from the class reunion, he kept talking about why Miyuki-senpai didn't come. I remembered that Eijun also mentioned that it was because of a violent incident on the team. No, how could that matter cause Miyuki-senpai to leave baseball The reason, that kind of thing. He also told me that when he was in the second grade, his school team had a conflict with another team that was a bit rogue, and several fourth-year seniors' drafts were affected. At that time, Miyuki The senior also led them to regain morale and get out of the shadow of the incident. But it didn't take long for him to propose to leave the team. Everyone was surprised, and the supervisor didn't miss him, but he didn't leave anything, saying that he was a family member. In some cases, he insisted on leaving. After that, he immediately transferred to the finance department of the school and graduated within a year. At that time, some seniors who had a good relationship with him revealed that it was his family’s business problem. I found it strange Yes, if you become a professional baseball player, won’t you be able to solve your financial problems as well?”

"No, he probably considered a lot before finally deciding to choose this optimal solution. Such a self-righteous guy never consults with others, but what makes people unhappy is that his choice always seems to be right."

She looked back at Sawamura.She had never seen his expression like this, soft, fuzzy, deeply trapped in the mire of memories.He thought of the first match they entered Koshien, the smile on Miyuki's face when he was fighting with injuries.Miyuki himself must be very clear - the self who has been standing on the diamond field doesn't care about anything except the fun of baseball, and of course he can't save the most important thing.

"Thank you, Wakana. Thank you for telling me this."

It's been a long time since I saw that undisguised smile, and it's been a long time since I showed it in front of her.This return gift, she likes it very much.

"What's the matter, just say something that Eijun would not say." And she couldn't help laughing, "To thank me, come to Nagano to attend the wedding. Ashin and the others have said they will come, so it's up to you."

"Say it sooner, tell me sooner! I'll discuss it with Master tomorrow! No matter what kind of competition there is, it's not as important as the life events of childhood sweethearts!"

"You have to walk the talk."

When the sun was about to sink, the cruise ship turned around, and a vast area of ​​water appeared in front of them.Wakana said, this is not a lake, it is even wider than Tokyo Bay.

Empty bodies of water always give the impression that the earth is actually an endless plane.When two people meet in this world, they look at each other and smile, pass by each other, back to back, and walk in diametrically opposite directions. Meet somewhere on this sphere, and see that familiar figure appear on the edge of the horizon like a natural miracle-who knows, it is just a mirage.Self-deception and cowardice masquerading as truth.Beautiful hope is just a lie.At that intersection, if you miss it, you will never meet again.

Is that right?

Sawamura suddenly felt that the vague shadow in the dream seemed to become clearer again.

Getting closer, more and more familiar blowing.He could reach out and trace that shadow with his fingertips.

He took a step, hoping to go forward.The one who let him escape is himself, the one who is stuck outside his world is also himself, the one who can't do anything, the one who is confused and cowardly, the one who knows nothing.

If we go around the original road, return to the place where we meet, and follow the track of time, we will definitely meet again.