Embroidered Pillows and Paper Tigers

Qu Ya was buried, she and Shen Yan had no relatives, and Fu Youcheng did not reappear after performing the pain of bereavement in front of the public.

The entire funeral was deserted, with only five people, Shen Yan, Li Shi'an and Lao Yu, because the funeral was on the weekend, Lao Xie and Zhu He also came.

Lao Yu decided not to transfer the studio, and just left it vacant for the lease period, so that Shen Yan would not have nowhere to go. After the funeral, a few people planned to go to Fu Youcheng's house to help Shen Yan get rid of Qu Ya's belongings, but at When they arrived at the door of Fu Youcheng's house, they found that Qu Ya's things had been thrown outside the door, and a small basket was placed at the door of Li Shi'an's house next door. A pair of small hands and feet were sticking out from the basket, kicking around indiscriminately. .

Li Shi'an hurried up and took out the baby inside. It was Fu Xiaotong. When she saw Li Shi'an, she kept making a "babbling" sound.

Shen Yan was already very depressed this day, when he saw the scene in front of him, he frantically went forward to pat on the door of Fu Youcheng's house, he kicked the door while shouting: "Fu Youcheng! Come out! Come out!"

Several neighbors opened the door to look, and then closed it as if they hadn't seen anything. Finally, a mother-in-law came out and said, "Stop shouting, we're moving out early in the morning." , "What's the matter, jumping off a building, moving, and fighting."

When Shen Yan heard that he was going to rush downstairs, Li Shi'an grabbed him: "Where are you going?"

"Look for Fu Youcheng, I'll kill him!" Shen Yan's eyes were red, he never expected Fu Youcheng to take care of him, but he didn't expect that bastard to ignore his own daughter, he roared again: "I'm going to kill him! "

Seeing that the situation was not right, Lao Yu hugged Shen Yan: "You can't go!"

Lao Xie quickly used his body advantage to block the corridor, and Zhu He also stood side by side with him, blocking the last gap in the corridor, and echoed: "Don't do this, Shen Yan!"

Shen Yan couldn't listen at all, he kept struggling, Lao Yu was not as strong as him, he almost broke free, and shouted at him: "You are going to be an adult soon, you will pay the price for what you did today, you will wear shackles on your hands Going in and out of the court, participating in various court trials, in order to deal with the judges and prosecutors' questions, I kept recalling all the details of today, think about it, child, don't destroy yourself!"

Shen Yan finally calmed down, and fell to the ground exhausted.

Li Shi'an hugged Xiaotong next to Shen Yan, took his hand and said, "Don't do this, let's find a way together."

Zhu He had seen this baby in the photo of Li Shian and Shen Yan kissing, so he probably knew what was going on. He said, "That man committed the crime of abandonment, right?"

Lao Xie said, "Since he committed a crime, wouldn't it be over if he sued him?"

Li Shi'an shook his head, that bastard Fu Youcheng had domestic violence, what kind of Xiaotong would he develop with him?But he couldn't separate the pain of Shen Yan and Qu Ya from showing to others, he could only say: "If he doesn't want to take care of them, it's not good for him to take care of them."

"Then... what should we do then?" Lao Xie was speechless.

Lao Yu realized how troublesome things really were: "Both of you are minors, I'm afraid you have to find an agency to take care of this child, but the child has a father, and the agency will shirk it, so..."

So it is very likely that the child will be handed over to the agency, and the agency will send it back to Fu Youcheng, and Fu Youcheng will abandon her again.

Hearing Lao Yu's words, Shen Yan glanced at Xiao Tong in Li Shi'an's arms, tears streaming down his face suddenly.Xiaotong is still so young, she doesn't know that her mother is gone, and her father doesn't want her, she doesn't know anything.

Xiaotong has been taken care of by Shen Yan since he was born, and his affection for the child is definitely deeper than that of Fu, but he is a child himself, and even if he cannot protect himself, how can he raise Xiaotong?

"Then what should we do?" Zhu He asked Lao Yu.

Old Yu shook his head, he didn't know: "Even if someone needs to find someone to adopt, it's still a question of where the child will settle before then."

Li Shi'an looked at Shen Yan, feeling distressed, why did Shen Yan have to bear all this?He is so good, so fragile and sensitive, and the reality seems to be full of strength, hitting him desperately, as if it will not stop until it breaks this person.

Why do this?

***

In the end, Fu Xiaotong was taken home by Li Shi'an. She was less than three months old, and she couldn't squeeze into Lao Yu's classroom with Shen Yan.

When Li Shi'an took Xiaotong back, he was ready to accept Li Qishan's sarcasm, and Li Qishan did not disappoint him.

"You have to take care of everything. How capable do you think you are?" Li Qishan leaned on the sofa and looked at Li Shi'an. The more chaotic things were going on next door, he became more and more confident about the two children's problems, so he didn't speak when he spoke. There was no anger mixed in with it.

Li Shi'an didn't answer. Apart from witnessing his own insignificance time and time again, he didn't feel that he had any abilities.

After all, Li Qishan is not a villain, and he also despises Youcheng's actions. Facing his son's silence, he said, "What are you going to do when you bring her back?"

"I don't know." Li Shi'an said.

He really didn't know, he and Shen Yan had taken care of this little baby together, and knowing that Shen Yan had feelings for her, the ideal way was to let Li Qishan adopt her, but Li Shi'an knew that it was impossible for Li Qishan to raise her, so now he wished he could take care of her with all his followers. It's better for Shen Yan to get rid of related things from his own life.

Li Qishan: "I don't know what you brought her back for? Or do you now know how to pity the baby? Why didn't you think about it when you were with Shen Yan, what would such a small baby do without a mother?"

"Dad, what do you mean?" Li Shi'an felt strongly uneasy.

Li Qishan slowly exhaled a smoke ring, and said what he thought he shouldn't have said: "Qu Ya suffered from postpartum depression, how dare you say that she wasn't depressed because of your problems with Shen Yan? Haven't you thought about it yourself?"

Li Qishan's words were like a bolt from the blue, hitting Li Shi'an head and face. Was it because Qu Ya couldn't think about it because he was with Shen Yan?Li Shi'an really didn't think about it, and he didn't dare to think about it.

"Why do you say that?" He questioned Li Qishan.

However, Li Qishan didn't answer, he left room for Li Shi'an to think for himself, he saw Li Shi'an's reaction in his eyes and was full of confidence.

The next day, the family invited an aunt to take care of Fu Xiaotong, and Li Qishan asked Li Shi'an to arrange Fu Xiaotong's whereabouts as soon as possible.

After Li Qishan succeeded in implanting the idea that "Qu Ya's death is related to you and Shen Yan being together" into Li Shi'an's mind, this idea began to haunt Li Shi'an like a ghost, making him feel guilty, uneasy, and even terrified. He didn't dare to fall asleep, and when he fell asleep, Qu Ya looked like he was covered in blood.

Shen Yan noticed that he was in a trance every day, and finally asked him: "Is there anything wrong with you recently?"

Li Shi'an nodded silently, and asked Shen Yan: "Is it because of our affairs that your mother can't think about it?"

Shen Yan never went to school after Qu Ya's accident, and turned around to devote himself to the intense preparation for the entrance exam. For him, dancing practice is a study, a hobby, and an escape.

He had also thought about Li Shi'an's question. He had recalled the last lunch with Qu Ya countless times, and carefully thought about every word Qu Ya said, but he didn't think that it was because of them that Qu Ya couldn't think about it.

He said, "No."

Li Shi'an said, "But I think so."

Shen Yan loudly denied: "No!"

Li Shi'an has fallen into a kind of nervousness: "Shen Yan, if our feelings destroy our family, it will destroy us sooner or later. The days of getting along may be sweet at the beginning, but we will slowly get along with guilt and regret. Start killing each other's love, patience and last mercy!"

Shen Yan collapsed: "I said no, why don't you believe me?"

For some reason, the more Shen Yan tried to deny it, the more Li Shi'an felt that Qu Ya's death had something to do with them, and he couldn't face himself, let alone Shen Yan.

Li Shi'an said, "I don't know."

Shen Yan: "Then what do you want to ask about this?"

Li Shi'an still said, "I don't know."

"I don't know" is the sentence he said the most recently. Every time he said it, he became more aware of what Li Qishan meant by "small".

Li Qishan lied to him, he said that life is like that coffee candy, that all hardships come to an end, but this time the suffering seems to have no end, ever since the matter between him and Shen Yan was exposed by Yu Qiao, things have continued to happen.

Life is not like this candy. It is not that if you suffer today, you will taste sweet tomorrow.The sweetness and bitterness of life are messy and disorderly. Some people don't know what sweetness is like in their whole life, just like Qu Ya.

The dance room was terribly quiet, Shen Yan seemed to understand Li Shi'an's intention of coming to him today, tears kept falling, he told everything, hoping to save this relationship.

"My mother and I had dinner for the last time that day. She asked me if I liked boys because I was disappointed in her. I will pick her up tomorrow, we will move out from Fu Youcheng together, who knows..."

Li Shi'an suddenly hugged Shen Yan tightly, and he was unwilling to let go for a long time.

After Shen Yan's sobbing and trembling had calmed down, Li Shi'an said, "Shen Yan, go study abroad."

Shen Yan stared blankly at the mirror in the classroom without saying a word.

"Say something," Li Shi'an begged.

Shen Yan wiped away the tears: "You don't believe me, you don't want me anymore, if you don't want me, don't want me, what else do you want me to say?"

"Even if it's for yourself," Li Shi'an said, "for your dream, the life you want, go out, Shen Yan."

Li Shi'an promised not to give up, but in the end it turned into persuading him to leave. All the things that happened recently have overdrawn Shen Yan's anger, and he was left with exhaustion and helplessness: "I never knew what kind of life I wanted to live. , it's you who don't know."

Li Shi'an nodded: "Yes, I have never been as persistent, brave and strong as you, so I need time and space to think about it."

Shen Yan: "Need me to leave?"

Li Shi'an closed his eyes: "Yes."

Shen Yan: "How long do you have to think about it? One month or two months, or one year or two years? Or simply never want to see me again?"

"I don't know." Li Shi'an said painfully.

"Okay, I'll go." Shen Yan stood up, slammed the door and left.

Li Shi'an didn't know how he left the dance studio. When he went home and told Li Qishan that Shen Yan had agreed to go abroad, Li Qishan patted him on the shoulder and said, "Finally sensible."

Still "sensible".Li Shi'an didn't say another word, and went upstairs quietly.

The day before Shen Yan left, out of respect, Li Qishan informed Li Shi'an in advance, and Li Shi'an said, "Let me see him off."

Li Qishan nodded.

It was raining on the day we parted, and Li Qishan didn't show up. He arranged for someone to take Shen Yan to the airport. Li Shi'an stood downstairs and waited for Shen Yan. When Shen Yan dragged a box down, he never expected to see Li Shi'an. Standing there, expecting a word of persuasion, but heard Li Shi'an say, "I'll see you off."

give you?How decisive.

Li Shi'an graciously stepped forward to open the trunk, he wanted to reach out to pull Shen Yan's trunk, but Shen Yan refused.

When getting into the car, Shen Yan even blocked the door, showing a gesture of refusal, and said to Li Shi'an, "Let's go here."

Li Shi'an froze in place, then saw Shen Yan get into the car, and closed the door with a "bang".

Until the moment the car started, Li Shi'an was running behind the car, chasing after him, but he didn't know what he was chasing. After all, he was still reluctant to part with Shen Yan, but it was he who made Shen Yan leave, he was the one who refused to believe Shen Yan Yes, he said that it takes time and space.

Shen Yan saw Li Shi'an running in the rain in the car's rearview mirror, tears streaming down his face, but he stubbornly refused to turn his head.

The plane gradually took off, Shen Yan overlooked the city in the air, watching the usually oppressive city gradually become the size of a matchbox below, he remembered the night when Li Shi'an met his grandparents for the first time, The movie they watched together was called "The Truman". Shen Yan liked the line in it very much: If I can never see you again, I wish you good morning, good afternoon, and good night.

"Goodbye, Li Shi'an."

Li Shi'an was still sitting on the side of the road under the building. He looked up and saw the plane passing quietly across the gray sky, and fine raindrops dripped down his face. He said, "Goodbye, Shen Yan. Goodbye, my boy."