Mecha and God

When I was a straight man—to be precise, I don’t know exactly when that was, after all, my previous memories are all taken out of context—I used to imagine that if I had to meet my father-in-law one day, I would what should i do.According to the habits of people on earth in the early 21st century, I will buy a few cigarettes, buy a set of anti-aging cosmetics, put on a new suit, apply some hair oil, and then knock on the door of my father-in-law with all my sincerity and honesty.

It turned out that I was gay, and my husband had no father or mother, no father-in-law to serve him, no mother-in-law to run on him, so we skipped the process of a new daughter-in-law entering the house in a daze, and skipped directly to the key step of my husband coming to the house as a son-in-law.

To be honest, I have never seen Long Yin so panicked.

I thought that if I became gay, I could get rid of the fate of waiting for my wife to dress up, but I didn't expect to be waiting here for me.The military uniform was changed one after another, all the military badges and ribbons were hung on the chest, and a light woody perfume was sprinkled on it.

"Do you think it tastes okay?"

"Our family raises pigs." I fell on the sofa, put one leg across my knees, trembling, "Pigs stink, really. If you've been there, you'll know that, except for the smell of pigs, you can smell everything. not come out."

Long Yin took out a small notebook and began to write: There are pigs at home.Then check the living habits of this unique species on the sentinel planet online. "Do you want to bring any gifts for your pigs? Are there any taboos about pigs to obey?"

"No—you don't need to be so nervous, Long Yin, really, you just come to my house for a light meal. My parents are ordinary people, and they are very nice."

"They are family to you, but they are complete strangers to me, and my life's happiness is still in their hands. Of course I have to be fully prepared to please them."

"Today is very tight, you are not ready, we don't need to tell our parents."

Long Yin's button-buttoning slowed down, "What are you talking about?! You're going to let me go to your house to have a meal without a name, just like Sha Zuo?! We've already slept!"

I quickly put my feet down and sat up straight.Sha Zuo, who had been lying on the sofa with his feet up on the backrest, also sat up and took off the magazine on his face, "Well, who called me? Can I go?"

Long Yin glared at us, then turned around to sort out his final attire, "The next item is the means of transportation. Are we going to use the armor? I brought the latest fighting machine, which is limited to ten units in the entire galaxy."

"No, no, my parents are not the kind of people who feel that they have more face in front of the whole village just because their son-in-law comes to the door in a luxurious mecha! And my family raises pigs, understand? Where can I get a pigpen? Is there a place for you to give me a hangar?!"

"Also, we have tense race relations now. Daedalus has already sent out a message to let the Hilo people prepare for the hunting day... If we go there in the mecha, maybe the whole village will run away." Sha Zuo Take over.

Long Yin thought for two or three seconds, "Yes, yes... I can't wear a military uniform and all the medals, it's too offensive, it's almost like saying: I am the executioner who is about to slaughter you !They won't like me."

Went in again to change clothes.

"In order to go to your house for dinner, I haven't eaten since morning, and now I'm really hungry..." Sha Zuo complained to me.

"Get lost—" Long Yin yelled crisply from the fitting room.

Sha Zuoxuan and I sat up straight again.

In the end, Long Yin chose to wear his usual uniform, that is, to wear epaulets on his shoulders in a conspicuous position, to show that he is a worthy officer among the conquerors. "In this way, even if they don't like me, they dare not drive me away, because they will worry that I will go back and kill everyone in the village."

"Have you changed from flattery to threat! Don't give up on yourself like this! What's your original intention!"

Long Yin led us downstairs, pointing to a big cardboard box in the back seat of the car, "here."

"what is this?"

"Gift."

"This gift looks a bit big..." I got into the car, "Actually, our door-to-door son-in-law usually has a chicken in one hand, a duck in the other, and sometimes a little doll on his back."

Long Yin had a face full of horror, "This is all right?! It's too foul. It's impossible to be kicked out by the old man, and I have all the dolls! Damn it, why didn't I think of it? - Sha Zuo, you know the school Has anyone's omega had a baby recently, can I borrow it?"

"Which family's alpha is more expensive from father to son!" Sha Zuo yelled at him. "Don't give up on yourself so much!"

Long Yin finally dismissed this idea.Erhu Zongzi stood at the speed of light 7800, touched his head, "Come on, master."

Doudou's eyes with a light speed of 7800 also blinked biubiu.

Long Yin told them to take good care of their home, drove past the mecha warehouse, picked up Xilou and Chuanbei, and our group went to the village of the Xiluo people.It would be foolish to leave the "Temple" protective barrier as the sun was about to set, because the forest is full of horrible xenomorphs.Fortunately, we all carried guns. During the 45-minute drive, we shot down three flying beasts with a wingspan of more than 5 meters, five packs of Timberwolves, and seven or eight insects with a height of more than three meters.I, Chuan Bei, and Sha Zuo shot at the window, and at the same time had to deal with Long Yin's endless problems. After the shooting, I had to take a small towel to help him wipe the splash on the windshield. The blood on it was really exhausting.I really never thought that one day I would take my other half home to meet my parents, and it would be a Hollywood disaster movie.

However, there are a lot of these alien species recently, and the attack power and attack tendency have been significantly enhanced, which makes people feel creepy.

Although in the end our car was riddled with bullets and leaks from all sides, we got home safely and parked the car by the river pond in front of my house.Xilou blushed and got out of the car, "Mi Nuonuo, I'm going home first, I have to go see my grandpa."

"Let's go after dinner, there are quite a few of you."

"I can't..." Xilou opened the car door and ran away with short legs.

Xilou has a bad reputation in the village.His grandfather was an old lunatic who always said horrible and incomprehensible words. When he was a child, whenever the old lunatic went out, the children would follow him and throw stones at him.Later, the old lunatic fell ill and never went out again, so they bullied Xiao Xilou instead.I don't know if there is any other meaning in these so-called "bullying". Anyway, I feel that some boys in the village are not so innocent. After all, Xilou is a bit too beautiful.Chuan Bei and I protected him, and as time passed, there were rumors that Xilou would seduce people at a young age.My father once asked me about this in a side-by-side manner, asking me if I liked Xilou. I was not sensible at the time, so I told Xilou this as a joke. Later, Xilou did not dare to walk too far with us in front of people. Nearly, even going to my house are cautious.

Normally, I would definitely catch him to my house for dinner, but today is a special situation. As soon as I stepped into the village, I felt that the atmosphere was not right. There was tension in the air, presumably because the hunting day was approaching.At this juncture, I took the two conquerors home, so the West Tower should be less involved in this matter.

After Xilou left, I asked Long Yin to follow me.Long Yin asked me back: "Is your home this country villa?"

"Yes."

"You guys go first, we'll be there later." Long Yin winked and told Sha Zuo to stay.

Chuan Bei and I went in first.When I got to the gate of the courtyard, I turned my head and saw Long Yin and Sha Zuo rehearsing how to meet my parents under the gradually rising moon and on the river pond.

How to act and how to act with the same hands and feet.

I laughed.

******

There was no dinner at home when I walked in.My dad was trying to drive the pigs who were stealing food in the kitchen back to the pigsty. When he saw me coming, he asked me to help without saying a word.That's what my dad is like.

After finishing the farm work, my dad said to me, "This time you worked a lot of overtime at the White Rose Military Academy. Some people also said that you caused a lot of trouble and went to outer space... I can't say a word about those words." I don't believe it. If this is the case, the conquerors would have come to our door to question us."

At this time, Long Yin and Sha Zuo appeared outside the courtyard.

Long Yin stood outside the door, expressionless under the reflection of the gasoline lamp, without saying a word, looking particularly ferocious.

All I know is that he forgot the words.

And Sha Zuo also put the knife and gun in his belt, and the army stab was full of blood.It is estimated that Long Yin reminded him that no one is teasing him tonight, so he remained expressionless and said nothing. Let's feel the visual effect.

My dad was so scared that he yelled that he was not good, and dragged us to run away.I quickly pulled the old man back, "This is my guest. The two friends I made in the military academy are good people. They passed by here today and came to have a light meal."

My dad had a face of "fucking this is actually called a good person", and he was so frightened that the two trembled.But he is also a respectable person in the town after all, and he has eaten more food than me for decades. At this time, he said in a trembling voice, "In this case... please come in."

Long Yin pretended to be calm and said, "Thank you."

Then lift your feet.

He stumbled on the threshold and fell like a dog eating shit.

Sha Zuo, who was following behind him, didn't have time to brake and fell on top of him.

The two raised a lot of thatch, frightened the wandering chickens to flutter their wings, the watchdog barked, and the pigs poked their heads out in the pigsty: Heang~heang~ohy~ohy~"It happened What's the matter? Is Mino being naughty again?"

My mother came out of the house in a shawl and looked at the yard.

"No... I just came back! I have been away for more than a month, and I just came back for 3 minutes!"

"Have you been away for more than a month?" My mother wrapped her cloak tightly, "I still remember the scene where you knocked over an oil bottle in the cellar."

"It's really not Mino being naughty this time, my wife," said my father, "it's two Conquistador lords who fell through the door and wanted to have a light meal."

"The current conquerors are really hard to understand. They used to be much simpler. When they came, they just burned, killed and looted, and never disturbed the people."

My mother held my father's arm and watched Long Yin and Sha Zuo standing up, shaking off the thatch from their clothes, recalling the past, and their eyes were red.

My dad sighed, "Hurry up and prepare dinner, the rice vat will bottom out as soon as my son comes back, not to mention there are two master conquerors."