night lights up

"Are you surprised?" He asked, his voice low and without warmth.

I didn't say anything, I just looked down at my cell phone number from ten years ago.Every time the phone screen goes dark, I touch it again to make it light up again.

During the touch, press your finger again to go to the "Recent Calls" page.On that page, there was only one name, all of which were "wife A".My finger slides down, almost every day, but there is no small phone sign at the top of all these calls.

Explain that these calls have never been made through.

How could it be possible to get through, I smashed the original mobile phone and threw it away.

Although never through, these calls still exist every day.

Even today, just a few hours ago.

Chu Heng said: "I recharged the phone number, but even so, every time I dial out, there will always be the word 'shut down'."

My fingers swipe so fast that I can't even read the words on the screen.

He said again: "It's better than the number not existing."

My fingers are twitching.

He stretched out his hand to hold my finger, and my finger was shaking habitually.

He asked again, "Is it a surprise or a fright."

The phone screen was also covered by the palm of his hand holding my finger.

If, not for that song suddenly sounded, maybe there would never be such a conversation between us?

I also never see such a mobile page?

So what if you see it?

How could I be with Chu Heng?

This has nothing to do with love, let alone betrayal.

If I never knew this, I would be more at ease.I know that in a city hundreds of kilometers away from me, a person will hate me for the rest of my life, so I will feel much more at ease.

I'm sorry for him.

but--

It's not that I don't want to be with him.

I just, can't be with him, absolutely not.

"It's really hard to find you. I've looked for every city you said you liked, but I didn't expect you to be here."

So it is false to say that you came here unintentionally, you just came to find me.

"I never thought he would be with you." There was a little self-mockery in his voice, "Maybe the sky above my head can't see it, I accidentally found out that he is in this city last month. I just found some clues."

"You, when did you start looking for me." I finally spoke out, my voice trembling more than my fingers.

"On the day of the university graduation ceremony, I put on the suit you chose for me. When I put on the tie, I thought that you had learned how to tie a tie for me for more than a month. When the day came, I still tied the tie for myself."

He didn't know where to look, and his voice filled my heart.

"I was in the audience, watching another person who was not as good as me give a speech as an outstanding graduate."

I'm about to cry, I'm sorry for him for the rest of my life.

"I don't hate, I'm very calm, I never care about these things. A person always shows the best side to everyone. When he accidentally makes a mistake that is obviously not wrong, everyone will treat him. Disappointed, even blaming him. Only he knows, he's just being himself."

He called me: "An Sifeng."

I bowed my head and started to cry embarrassingly.

"You know what I was thinking?"

I shook my head.

"I miss you."

I cried and looked up at him: "I'm sorry, I was a stain on your life. After you got to know me, everything changed. You were punished by the school because of me, and you let everyone down on you because of me."

He didn't wipe my tears. He looked at me crying and said calmly: "I'm thinking of you, thinking that you are the only one worthy of me. Since I was a child, I lacked nothing, even Being a good person is so normal and easy.”

"It's not that I don't have pursuits, it's just that even pursuits are so easy for me to get."

"I used to be such an excellent me until I met you."

I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and said repeatedly, "I'm sorry."

He added: "I thought at the time, how can I lose the only you like this?"

I howled.

"I think, even if you betray me and hurt me, I must not lose you."

"Everyone was listening to that classmate's speech. The leaders clapped and smiled as usual. The media took pictures happily, and the juniors screamed like that. In their eyes, I was just a label called 'excellent' .I have a lot less, and I don’t have more. There are always all kinds of excellent people in the world, and I can be replaced by any one.”

"But, I am with you, and I am the only one."

"I'm not just an excellent person, I'm just the only Chu Heng with you."

His voice was low and deep: "In the middle of the ceremony, I turned around and ran away. I took off my academic uniform and tie while running, and everyone made way for me with surprise on their faces. I was not normal at that time, and my parents sent People are staring at me all the time. Otherwise, my actions that day will inevitably be photographed and posted online.”

"I ran out of the auditorium and wanted to find you."

"But you're gone."

He laughed: "Later, I thought, I really wish my appearance could be photographed and posted on the Internet that day. That way, you can see me, and you probably want to come back to find me."

He continued: "If you think about it carefully, I actually have something to pursue."

He called me again: "An Sifeng, do you know what my pursuit is?"

I'm afraid I'm going to cry and faint.

Why ten years later, he is still so good, he still likes me so much.

I have become like this, with wrinkles, and a weirder personality. I open such a store and make unscrupulous money.

But he is still willing to say such things to me.

I hurt him like that once.

But how can we be together?

"It's been a long, long time since I've said so many words." He laughed at himself again.

I haven't cried like this for a long, long time.

"Seems like I should really be thankful for those songs?" he asked me.

He didn't lock the car just now, I was a little afraid of his words, I really wish he hated me.I cried and tentatively opened the door behind me, and it opened.I froze for a moment, retracted my legs, turned around and got out of the car.

One foot was wearing a shoe and the other was not, and I was suddenly at a loss.

What am I doing getting out of the car?

My face was a little tense from crying, I was standing by the car, blowing the wind by the river, and I was still convulsing.

Chu Heng followed me out of the car and asked me, "Forcing me to tie you up again?"

I turned to look at him, shook my head, and wanted to say that I didn't mean to come down, and I didn't know what I was going to do when I ran down.

But what he needs me to say is not only these, I can't say those words, although I have more things to say to him in my heart.

Halfway through shaking, I quickly stopped again.

He hugged me horizontally again, and said to me: "An Sifeng, do you still remember that I once said that I would hug you like this for the rest of my life?"

I remember, but I can't remember.

Before I could deny it, he said again: "When I was young, I didn't know much about it. I thought that my whole life was the biggest promise. After walking for ten years, I realized that the bigger the promise, the bigger the joke."

My tears were dried by the wind, and I felt like hiccupping from crying.

After he finished speaking, he continued: "In your shop, when I carried you into the car, you knew what I was thinking."

I shook my head.

He hugged me tighter: "I finally hug you again."