Food Bureau

I had an older brother, if I remember correctly, his name is Shang Zixuan, my memory of him is short and vague, it probably started when I was two years old, and ended when I was three years old, because he fell ill that year and died young up.

The disease is not common. His uncle and aunt took him all the way from China to the United States for medical treatment. He was diagnosed as a disease caused by the chromosome gene chain. If they have another child, the chance of their children getting this disease still exists. They Unable to bear such a blow any longer, he decided to adopt.

Since I was three years old, no one in my family mentioned the elder brother who came and left in a hurry.

After several years of waiting for Shangru to come to our house, during an afternoon tea, my aunt and my mother lamented that adoption is all about eye contact, and Shang Ru is to let everyone in the Shang family see her so that they can match each other.I was about eleven or twelve years old that year, quietly eating a freshly baked cake, thinking, I just look alike.

To be more precise, grandma likes her.She even looks more like a grandma than me.

When Shangru was still in the orphanage, he didn't know his last name. At that time, all the children who didn't know their last name had the same last name as Zhang.Zhang Ru showed extraordinary artistic talent when she was very young. Her paintings won the first prize in the provincial children's welfare home competition and were recommended to Shang's family.

She was able to fall in love with Zhuo Bing at first sight and see each other as before, which is not unrelated to the artistic atmosphere shared by the two of them.

Shang Ru can really make everyone in the Shang family meet her. I have a deep understanding of this matter and paid the price for it.

I thought that every girl had experienced a period of absurd ignorance, the summer before I went to England to study in girls' high school, my memory is a deep and shallow pink...

The color of the flower, the color of the body, the color of the tattoo...the color left after the tattoo is washed off.

I thought that all the absurdities would be forgotten as the tattoos receded, or pretended to be forgotten. A person's life is like a boat sailing from one shore to the other. The new ship is wobbly and flustered, but when it gets farther and farther away from the shore, and when you look back, you will know that the most dangerous things are hidden under the calmest sea. forgotten.

I also remember that it rained that night too, which is a lot of rain at that time of year in London.When I returned to London from Yorkshire, the Shang family prepared a house for me. I thought my family would let me live in the same house with Shangru, but luckily they didn’t. But after that night, I knew that this arrangement was intentional. They We deliberately kept us far apart.

Shangru came to see me that night, and the ambiguous feelings remained in the summer in Yorkshire. She kissed the tattoo on my waist, and I kissed her. That was our last kiss.

"Do you still like women?" I asked her.

She thought for a while, "I don't know, I'll know when I meet." She put on her clothes, "What about you?"

I shrugged, "Maybe, girls are beautiful."

I sent her out and went back to the bedroom. I turned off the light, and the phone fell under the bed. When I picked it up, I saw a small blue light flashing on the wall, and then flashing again. I panicked, and turned on the light. I saw a suspicious thing in a very hidden place, next to the smoke alarm to be precise. If you don't pay attention, you will think it is the light that comes with the alarm.

I went to get a hammer, and nervously smashed the wall. After about half an hour, my phone rang. It was grandma. She said she wanted to talk to me.

The content of the conversation was about this wonderful video tonight. I knew that my grandpa was beside me. To avoid embarrassment, my grandma acted as the talker.

And I also know that after the conversation with me, Shang Ru will receive the same call.

The content of the conversation is actually nothing special. I will not be able to meet with Shangru for the next year, and they will arrange a psychologist to give us counseling.

I was crying on the phone.Teenage girls generally feel that their life is over. The most secretive affair and the most private body are caught off guard by others in this way. I don’t think that what happened to my monk Ru is a mental illness. , but starting this evening, I really need a therapist.

Yes, I spent a year repairing this shame and anger, but since then, I never dare to sleep with the lights off. Every night before going to bed, I will check the corners of the room, and often Waking up from a nightmare, staring at the empty room alone until dawn.

Let alone sleeping in a strange place.Until I come across contacts.

There seems to be a kind of magic power in coming and going, and that magic power acts on the air around her, and it even started the moment I saw her back from Xiao Ziyan's circle of friends.

In the place where she exists, I can sleep peacefully, even if I am awakened by nightmares.

The moment you close your eyes, it’s like passing by a bakery when you’re hungry, and the sweet baked bread is coming out of the oven. The smell makes you feel the safety and longevity of the whole world, even if you don’t plan to go in and eat a piece, You stand at that door, on that street, smelling the sweetness and smiling.

I have been separated from Shangru for a year, she met Zhuo Bing, I am happy for her, and my emotional world has been blank ever since.If I haven't experienced the sense of shame at that moment, only I have experienced the shame of desperately wanting to destroy everything, even myself.

Later, the matter of Shang Ru and Zhuo Bing gradually came to the attention of the family. I know that the elders have talked with them, but after all, they are not like me and Shang Ru. Despite the relationship between sisters, the family did not take strong measures to deal with it. Prevent.

Until Pei Sihan proposed to marry a girl from the Shang family, of course, as smart as him, he originally wanted to marry me, and he knew that I was the one who was related by blood to the monk Tanzhi.

But Shang Qinzhi didn't think so. Firstly, he might not have a crush on Pei Sihan, so he was reluctant to marry his only granddaughter to him. Secondly, he also wanted to take this opportunity to break up Shang Ru and Zhuo Bing.

He succeeded and failed.

He can bring Shangru back; he can throw down the copy of our video after a kind conversation, yes, Shangru didn't know we were secretly filmed until then; he can make Shangru feel shocked When he was at a loss, he agreed to the marriage in a daze, and broke up with Zhuo Bing.But I underestimated the love between Shang Ru and Zhuo Bing, it is no longer the ignorant and meaningless love between me and her.

He didn't expect that after careful consideration, Shang Ru confessed everything to Pei Sihan, told him that she had a same-sex partner and could not marry him, she got off the car at Feihong Bridge, and Pei Sihan chased after her. Shang Ru forced him to die, and finally fell down.

When she was rescued and sent to the hospital, I promised her that no matter what, I would protect and take care of Zhuo Bing in the future.

We told everyone, including Zhuo Bing, that the two had quarreled over the planning of the wedding, and that it was as if they had stumbled and fallen.After weighing it up, Pei Sihan was willing to cooperate with this statement, and never mentioned Shangru's secret to the outside world, otherwise, although he was not the direct murderer, he would become the sinner who forced Shangru to jump off the bridge.

Later I asked Shang Ru what happened that day. Shang Ru told me that although Pei Sihan was angry, she didn't want her to jump off, but she was too emotional when the two stood there arguing and pushed him away. One stroke, half of the reaction force, half of the inner despair, she fell off the bridge and fell into the water.

After Shangru was rescued, Shang Tanzhi put her under house arrest in Jingshan Nursing Home in order to cover up the family ugliness. He only said that she was not saved, and issued a fake death certificate through connections and money.Zhuo Bing couldn't accept this incident, her spirit was stimulated, and she crashed into a car where she fell into the water. She was also rescued, but we told Shang Ru that Zhuo Bing died.Afterwards, Zhuo Bing gradually recovered after another year of psychological treatment, but these years he had occasional hallucinations.

Only the family and Pei Sihan know Shangru's real whereabouts.

Pei Sihan knew that he wanted to marry a girl from the Shang family only for his future, and he also knew that Shang Ru's death was inseparable from him, so he pretended to forget about it all these years, and Shang Qinzhi persuaded the board of directors to give him an extra Some shares are regarded as hush money.

And I signed a non-disclosure contract with my grandfather Shang Qinzhi. The content of the contract was drawn up by his elite lawyer team. There is literally no clause that would invalidate the contract. The stock price information, my parents and I will transfer all the shares in Shanggu, and will never be employed by Shanggu and Shanggu's partners, suppliers, and customers.

The mother's efforts during her lifetime were due to her passion for this industry on the one hand, and on the other hand, she hoped to open up a new situation that is still ancient and develop a mature architectural design team. Unfortunately, she passed away early.

And I stayed, bound by the contract, and I still refused to recall the incident of the video in my heart, although I calmed down later and tried to analyze it rationally, Shang Qinzhi put face more important than All people, as long as they are not crazy, there is a high probability that they will not announce any scandals to the public, but my fear has reached a physiological level, and I just don't want anyone to think about it again.

But more, it is a sense of mission. Shang Gu is not only Shang Gu of Shang Qin, but also Shang Gu of his mother, and Shang Gu of all those who have fought for it. I want to stay and initiate this mission.

I don't hate Shang Tanzhi, he has no bad intentions for me after all, one day he will pass away and take all the secrets with him to the west, Shang Ru and Zhuo Bing will meet again, and Pei Sihan's status will be destroyed by me Team replacement, I firmly believe.The future of Shanggu belongs to us.

I thought I would keep silent and carry all these secrets and burdens on my back, until I finally met Zhuo Bing on a narrow road, and brought the stack of paintings to question me about the truth.

How can I blame her?I do owe her many, many truths that I am not a good lover.

In the past few days of breaking up, for an "ordinary person", it may be necessary to feel sad and weigh a relationship, but for me, what I weigh is all these heavy secrets and choices.

That day, I came back and asked me what kind of life I really want in my heart. This sentence seemed to have planted a seed and gradually sprouted in my heart.

Before I had a relationship, I almost regarded myself as a tool person. I lived for my parents, shouldered their mission, and lived for Shangru. After all, if grandpa married me to Pei Sihan, she and Zhuo Bing would not be so miserable, and took care of Zhuo Bing for her.

For so many years, I have lived like this, I am numb, and feel that I am doing well, as long as all the secrets are far away from me, I am a well-living person.

But going back and forth gave me a brand new, fresh new life. I seemed to hear the sound of my bones, muscles, blood vessels, and skin thawing. I seemed to be gradually becoming a real person every day, with my own joy. Anger, sorrow, and joy also affect the heart and emotions for another person's joy, anger, sorrow, and joy...

I even felt that, for the first time in all these years, I really understood my father, why he walked away seemingly irresponsibly, I really understood.

Last night, I made a decision that left me with no way out.

I went to Jingshan to look for Shangru, I know that she has not been crazy these years, but only occasionally, I know that she can live independently.

I confessed everything to her and told her that I had arranged a temporary residence for her and Zhuo Bing. After I found Zhuo Bing, I would take her out and help them go to Europe.

Tell Shang Ru that I also have a lover. For this love, I have to confess everything to her. I will take her to Feihong Bridge tomorrow morning. If she can accept the beginning of this secret, I will take her to See Shang Ru here, and finish the secret.

I was prepared to be blamed by Shang Ru, after all, I have been helping the Shang family to lie to her all these years.

I hate lies. I have never lied to anyone in my life, but I have to face two people who love each other to death. With such a big lie, I have been tortured, and now I am finally free.

Shang Ru was much calmer than I imagined. She even told me that Zhuo Bing was not easy to find, and she could help me if needed.

I know that Shang Ru finally has a reason to live well.

This rain came at an inappropriate time.

I stood under the eaves and waited to come and go. Through the gray rain curtain, I watched the rows of wheels rolling on the increasingly muddy road.

A pair of black leather boots stood in front of me, my heart sank, and I looked up along the trouser legs, and it really was Zhuo Bing.

I thought about what kind of request she would make if she appeared again. I thought about many possibilities, but I didn't think about this one. She asked me where Shangru was.

That tone and demeanor, as if she knew that Shang Ru was not dead, but still alive.

I hope everything goes according to my arrangement. If she messes up everything now and makes a big fuss at Shang's house, I will not be able to pick up Shang Ru, so I asked her to tell me her address, and I will go find her again.

But she didn't believe it no matter what... During the back-and-forth conversations, I saw that she came, and my heart was in a mess. I saw Lai Xiang rushing towards me, and stretched out my hand...

"She will watch you die with her own eyes," Zhuo Bing said.

I got a slight push on the shoulder...

I leaned back uncontrollably, instinctively grabbing something, it was an umbrella stretched out, what did I hear?Calling back and forth, no, there was another voice, that voice was calling Zhuo Bing, I was startled.

That is Shangru.

My arm was caught, and the umbrella led me to rush forward, but it was Zhuo Bing who grabbed my arm. In the next half a second, I rolled down on the bridge with Chuai, and she fell backwards. I'm falling forward...

I subconsciously hugged her waist and rolled to one side, fearing that she would fall too hard. In order to carry me with the umbrella, she fell heavily backwards after I caught the umbrella...

We rolled over the edge of the pavement, a car above us honked and went around, and we rolled half a circle to the side, she hugged me, held me tight, the blood on my hands, the blood on hers The blood was mixed together, something was dripping down the corner of my lips, it was salty.

I touched her face, hugged her into my arms again, and pressed my face against hers, "Back...Back...Are you all right? I'm all right..."

"Almost..." She hoarsely said, "I almost jumped down with you."

I suddenly remembered something and turned to look.

Shang Ru stood there in a daze, Zhuo Bing stood there in a daze.

I trembled uncontrollably, followed my gaze back and forth, and looked at them as well.

I saw Zhuo Bing finally reach out his hand, "Ru, is that you? Really you?"

My vision blurred, and I heard Shang Ru say in a trembling voice:

"Please, allow me to explain one thing first, to relieve your knot... At the beginning, I did not agree to marry that man. When I was standing here, I told him that he should either revoke the engagement or I would jump off."

My tears rolled down, and I saw Zhuo Bing slowly fall to the ground, her body was like a pile of ice that gradually melted, nine years of resentment and hatred, the resentment and hatred that she could not find her own direction, followed by this piece The ice slowly faded on the concrete floor where she had two car accidents, and melted here.

She stretched out her arms and hugged Shang Ru's legs, crying like an unworldly child.

Shang Ru knelt down, hugged her, and murmured: "I miss you so much..."

The author has something to say: I will conclude the article tomorrow, okay~