Do not love me

It's late at night, but I can't fall asleep again.

On the small white bed, Tezuka stared at the seldom-settled sleeping face with a stiff smile on the corner of his mouth, and stretched out his hand to gather her messy hair behind her ears.His fingertips lightly slid across her baby-like face.The delicate touch made Tezuka's long fingers tremble slightly.The sound of heartbeat also followed, and I am afraid that the invisible cheeks are also hot red.The feeling of intoxication is mixed with sweetness, so this is the experience of love?Sure enough, he is not a saint, and he will be fettered by such feelings.Looking at her sleeping face like this greedily, he is so insignificant.So insignificant that he could wipe out years of silence just for her peace of mind.

Little favors, little joys, little happiness filled his lonely heart that hadn't been filled at the moment.Quietly, she took her soft hand and pressed it against her heartbeating chest.Trying to use her quietness to calm all the panic.Some things have been explained, which is a kind of relief, but also a kind of panic.It's just that at this moment, the original panic was replaced by the warmth of her palm and the peaceful sleeping face.There is no such thing as heartache or not, no such thing as ethics, and no such thing as love or not.Heartbeat, heartache, heartache.That is love.What other rhetoric can be found there?

It doesn't matter what you lose.Everyone wants to love someone who wants to love once.

Stop struggling, don't think about whether she loves someone else, don't want to understand whether the future is possible, if you can look at her like this, it doesn't matter if loving her will hurt in the future.I don't want to be depressed anymore, it hurts to press such a heavy thing on my heart.

suffocated.

What can't be suppressed but must be suppressed is always annoying and aggrieved.He is not the kind of person who asks for hardship, nor is he the kind who cannot bear it.Even if he clearly knows that falling in love with the person in front of him who cannot be accepted by the world is a big mistake among mistakes, he still wants to go on.Even if it was, in the end he was covered in bruises.

Let him, who usually does not make mistakes, make a big mistake.

Begging God like this, he begged God to forgive his willful and knowing behavior.

Wrapping her small palm, Tezuka looked out of the dimly lit window.Hopefully that unknown god in the sky will hear his prayers.They will pray for happiness.

A flash of bright light flashed by.Tezuka smiled slightly.It seemed to be a sign of God's consent.

There was always a smile on the corner of his mouth, because he was sure that they would be happy.

Good night, kissing the forehead that was unfamiliar but felt familiar many times, he put the hand that had suddenly become cold without noticing it into the bed.Get up and turn off the lights and leave.

And... that distant falling meteor, the barely audible meteor.No one knows whose wish was fulfilled.Because on the same night, at the same time, someone made a wish like him.

A girl asleep, promised.Don't love me, wish.

Don't love me, falling in love will hurt you.

Knife wounds, scalds, and burns are not as good as the wounds with marks on the heart.It hurts beyond words.Does he understand all these?

I don't understand, do I?

She also didn't understand.All I know is that it hurts.Don't ask Qianshang Weiai how she knew it would hurt so much, just know that when he held her hand and pressed it to her chest, her heart throbbed inexplicably, almost to the point of piercing her lungs.Just a little bit, she couldn't bear it, let alone falling in love with her like this?She didn't want his heartache, so she chose to make this wish.

Are you saying she is too kind?Or do you want to say that she is too cruel?

If you want to count, it should be too cruel, right?Obviously so heartbroken, but also so cruel to treat yourself and the one you love...

Love……

It really is love.It turned out that he had unknowingly given him the place of the one he loved in the mist.It's only now... that I realize... how cruel it is.The reason why she was so attached to him turned out to be nothing more than this kind of feeling... To this day, what else can she do when she finds out?Only, possess him greedily for a short while, and then return him intact to where he should stand.

God really went too far and treated her unfairly.Why not let him show up earlier?Why not let her find herself in love with a stranger the day before that night?She wanted to make such an unreasonable request to God, but she couldn't find a bargaining chip to use.

Stupid, already beyond redemption.

Asakami Yui why are you so stupid not to fall in love with this man before that happened?Why do you have to be so tolerant towards that sister who always makes herself tidy up?Why should he be punished instead of her?

There is no one to blame, so Qianshang Weiai can only naively find excuses for herself to blame a person she should hate.

In the dark night, the girl hugged her huddled legs with both hands, and the trembling appearance made everyone who saw it feel distressed.

Can't cry, desperately warned myself.She told herself not to cry.The crystals kept falling, one after another, seemingly unprecious.Wet a large piece of soft quilt.The slightly bitter salty taste asked her to try one by one.This taste is so disgusting that she wants to slap away the traces of the astringent smell with a wave of her palm.She was dreaming, dreaming unrealistic dreams.In the dream, they were in love but not staying together. In the dream, she was doomed to find no happiness even if she tried her best.

She loves him, is in love.What to do now?

Selfish possession for a little while?Or leave in awe-inspiring manner and live a sad life alone?She is not a saint, not a kind person, so there is no way to go against her own heart.The desire to be with him has become so strong that it is unavoidable and on the verge of breaking out.

"Tezuka..."

I don't know what strange motivation it was that forced her to get up barefoot and rush into the room of the person she fell in love with before she even had time to dry her tears.

Well, he hasn't rested yet, and the lights are on.

Don't care so much, don't care if his body is still half-wet, whether he is in an embarrassing state where he didn't even put on his shirt and only covered his important parts with a towel, and even more don't care about his astonishment, she floated in like the wind, From behind he hugged Tezuka's dripping body tightly.The hindrance of her stomach can't make her hug him harder, but it is enough affection.

I was stunned for a moment, and time was frozen in an instant.The hand wiping the hair was also still, unable to move.The fragrance penetrated into the nostrils, causing Tezuka's heart, which could clearly distinguish her smell, to sink to the bottom and stop beating.Also, the originally smooth breathing sound became hasty.If you beat slowly, you might even stop breathing.

"Asakami..." A trembling voice sounded from Tezuka's mouth with a cold tone that did not match the emperor's.

A little tension, a little joy, and a little uncertainty are all kinds of emotions mixed in Tezuka's voice.

The nervous thing is that she hugs herself proactively like this, always when she is sad, but the happy thing is that he faintly senses how fast her heartbeat is, and how full of emotion it is.And what's not sure... he can't be sure if it's true?Are you dreaming.Have a dream that can be broken with a single hit.So, he was a little afraid to make a sound...

"Yeah." Asakami Yui replied softly.Then, without raising his head, he leaned his face closer to his warm back: "I won't call you Tezuka-kun, so why don't you call me Asakami as well. Just call me by my name."

Maybe it's because I just took a shower, the water droplets haven't dried thoroughly yet, so my back feels sticky and wet, and it's also cold.

Maybe she was crying...

Hearing what she said about not being alienated and calling him by his name, Tezuka's fingertips slipped from the wet hair on top of his head trembling slightly.With the scalded fiery palm, tightly wrapped the little hand that was released not long ago.

"Yes." He nodded in agreement with her request: "Wei Ai."

Calling out gently, this name that has never made me delusional feels so good.So good, he wanted to smile.

Nodding slightly, she heard it.She liked being called by his name like that.The indescribable tenderness and peace of mind penetrated into the heart one by one, warming the whole cold body.

"Can you let me hold you like this?" Hold you to sleep like this, so that she won't be mistaken for a hallucination.

He vaguely understood a lot of the dependence and panic in Qianshang Weiyan's mouth.He thought, that is love, right?Maybe that's the case, or maybe I'm thinking too much.However, it doesn't matter at this time, he doesn't care if he will make a mistake, as long as she can rely on him like this, that's fine.

Turning around without a trace, he didn't like being hugged by her so invisible.Wanting to be hugged by her all the time like this, and even more wanting the woman who is holding her to clearly see that the person she is relying on, the person holding, and maybe even the person she loves at this moment is him, Tezuka Kunimitsu.However, just as soon as he turned around, he clearly understood how superfluous, how selfish, and how cruel his domineering was.

How could she be wearing so little, without even shoes, hugging him who was wet all over?

silly woman.

Whisper softly.Tezuka bent down and hurriedly held her thin body into his arms.Trying to warm this fool's cold with his own body temperature.

His slender hands pulled over the messy quilt on the bed next to him, swiftly wrapped the woman with her head buried in his chest, and took advantage of the situation to hug her light body.On the bed that hasn't smelled of him yet.

Lie down on your side, "Sleep, I'll wait for you to fall asleep."

She was trembling, must be very scared?Couldn't help tightening the strength in his hand again.He hugged her trembling body more forcefully.

Just make this dream come true.

Closing her eyes, she was powerless to fight against reality.Tired, love, don't let go.

Wayward, own him.At least, I will leave a memory for myself.I'm so scared, even the memories will become blank after there are no traces.Just let the heart sink in his tenderness.It is life, it is death.Also willing.